WWE Extreme Rules (4.29.12)

APRIL 29, 2012

–  Earlier tonight, Santino Marella defeated the Miz in a match for the WWE United States Championship.

–  Your hosts are Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, and Booker T.

–  A video airs hyping tonight’s main event between Brock Lesnar and John Cena.  We are live with pyro in HD and all red ropes tonight.
1.  Kane vs.  Randy Orton
–  Kane charges and scoops up Orton into the corner.  Kane uppercuts Orton on the second rope and knocks him to the floor.  Cover by Kane on the floor gets 2.  Orton follows Kane back in with a lead pipe.  He nails him in the face with it and Kane goes up and over to the floor.  Lead pipe in the opening 2 minutes  = a match not going over 10 minutes.  They brawl through the crowd.  Kane laid out against the boards and Orton runs a knee to the face.  Cover gets 2.  Kane drops Orton down and nails a basement dropkick to the face for 2.  More brawling as the head up to the 2ND tier in the crowd.  Now BACK down to the entrance and Orton goes for the RKO.  Blocked, and Kane with a big boot for 2.  They head to the back and brawl near the level 4 elevators.  Orton throws Kane through the double doors and they brawl in front of people in the back.  Here comes Zack Ryder!  Kane goozles him and Orton Backbreaker gets 2.  Kane tosses Orton into an always needed rack of lead pipes.  Now backstage near the Gorilla position and Kane throws a stage crate at Orton and gets 2.  Back into the arena now.  They brawl back into the ring and Orton with a clothesline out of the corner.  Kane up quick into a low powerslam.  Orton grabs a chair from under the ring.  He goes to the ribs and cracks the chair over the back of Kane.  He takes about 5 more shots as the crowd chants YES YES YES YES YES!  Orton takes Kane to the outside at the announce table.  Kane goozles Orton and Orton elbows out.  ORTON DDTS KANE OFF THE TABLE TO THE FLOOR!  Cover gets 2.5.  Orton goes for the RKO and Kane sends him into the ringpost.  Cover gets 2.5.    Kane is headed up top as Orton is back in the ring.  Superplex by Orton from the top gets 2.5.  Orton tries for the RKO and Kane counters with a chokeslam!  Cover gets 2.999999!  Kane lays out a chair and sets up a chair and goes for a TOMBSTONE!  Orton escapes and RKO ON THE CHAIR!  Orton wins it @ 16:45!  (A slow build with maybe a little too much brawling.  Ending sequence was good and I liked the equal offense by both men.  Good start to the show and Chicago gets jacked up with this opener.  B-.)
–  Backstage, John Laurinaitis and Eve are happy with the way things went down in the opener.  The Raw Roulette is behind them to decide Cody/Big Show’s stipulation later.  Eve has a surprise, Teddy Long will play Benson tonight.  Johnny gets a call from Triple H and leaves quickly to talk to him.
2.  Brodus Clay (with Hornswoggle and The Fly Girls) vs.  Dolph Ziggler (with Vickie Guerrero and Jack Swagger)
–  Dolph runs away from Brodus and kicks him over the top to the floor.  Swagger on the outside with a running shoulderblock on Brodus.  Back in Brodus nails Dolph low, misses a kick and Dolph grounds him for 1.  Crowd is coming unglued for DOLPH!  Dolph with a sleeperhold (thought that was his finisher at one point) as Brodus makes it to his feet.  He throws Dolph over his shoulder.  Dolph charges and Brodus lands a headbutt to the stomach.  BIG Splash and Brodus is victorious @ 4:17.  (Not happy that they would do this to Dolph.  Swagger should have done the job…he’s expendable.  D.)
–  Earlier a wheel was spun to determine that the following match is a Tables Match.
3.  Big Show vs.  Cody Rhodes
–  Show begins by CHOPPING the hell outta Cody.  Cody bails to the floor for more punishment.  Show setting up a table early.  Cody runs.  Show sets up a table in the corner and sends Cody towards the table.  BEAUTIFUL DISASTER OFF THE TABLE!!!  Show goes after Cody and he continues to run.  Show on the apron and Cody kicks him off and one of Show’s legs goes through the table.  Ref catches it!  CODY REGAINS THE TITLE @ 4:39!  (Sorry to be a cheerleader but I was praying Cody would get the strap back.  Match was ehhh, but I love the ending.  D+.)
–  Post match, Show snaps and chokeslams Cody through a table in the ring.  He’s not done as Chicago boos him to shit.  Cody over Show’s head and gets tossed OVER THE TOP TO THE FLOOR, THROUGH ANOTHER TABLE!  Referees, EMTs are down to check on Cody.  Cody gets to his feet on his own and the crowd goes crazy for Cody.  A real “Stone Cold” moment for Cody.
–  Buy Edge’s DVD or just wait for it to be on Netflix.
–  Backstage, Matt Striker is standing by with Daniel Bryan.  Bryan counts the ways he is more superior than Sheamus.  Including his beard, he gets more chicks, and the fact that he is vegan.  He shits on Chicago as he has them in his hand.  He ends by chanting “YES YES YES” as he leaves.  AJ is watching from the side.  
–  We hype up the 2 out of 3 Falls match between DB and Sheamus.  

4.  Daniel Bryan vs.  Sheamus
–  Sheamus may have just gotten booed out the building worse than Cena at MITB last year.  FIRST FALL:  Sheamus begins with a shoulderblock and the crowd shits on him.  Side headlock by Sheamus and into a head scissors.  Sheamus gets free and DB gets free.  DB works the arm and Sheamus gets free.  Rolling senton by Sheamus (!?) gets 2.  DB on the apron and sunset flips back in.  Countered into a Texas Cloverleaf by Sheamus!  DB makes the ropes and small package gets 2.  DB runs up the ropes and flips over Sheamus and follows with a clothesline.  DB jumps into the arms of Sheamus and drives him into the barrier on the outside.  Sheamus heads up top and gets crotched.  DB works Sheamus over with kicks to the face and chest.  DB tries standing on the arms for a cover but gets 2.  DB goes back to work on the shoulder.  Sheamus gets him to the apron and clubs him in the chest 10 times.  DB won’t stay down and kicks Sheamus to the face in the corner.  They head up top and DB goes for the top rope huricarana but Sheamus holds on.  Sheamus off the top with a battering ram for 2.  Sheamus charges and DB holds down the top rope.  Sheamus hits the floor and charges into a forearm by Sheamus on the floor.  Sheamus goes for the Celtic Cross and DB slips down for a roll up for 2.5.  DB goes for the YES Lock.  Sheamus fights out and Sheamus charges and meets the ring post, shoulder first.  DB wears out the shoulder on the ringpost.  DB yells YES as he kicks Sheamus in the arm.  Referee calls off the 1ST Fall and gives it to Sheamus via DQ @ 14:35.  SECOND FALL:  DB charges Sheamus and drops him to the mat.  YES Lock is locked in.  Sheamus is knocked out and DB wins the 2ND Fall @ 16:38.  THIRD FALL:  DB is chanting YES YES YES with the crowd as doctor’s check on him.  Half the crowd is chanting NO.  Sheamus says he can go.  He pulls himself up and DB charges.  BROGUE KICK OUTTA NOWHERE!  Cover gets 2.8!  DB and Sheamus exchanges shots and DB knocks him out with a kick to the head.  Cover gets 2.5.  DB is on the top and misses a missile dropkick.  Sheamus with a double ax handle to the face.  Irish Curse Backbreaker connects.  Sheamus calls for it and BROGUE KICK spins DB around to his face on the mat!  Sheamus wins the 3RD FALL @ 22:54.  (Incredible match.  First fall was great and set up the rest of the match beautifully.  A.)
–  Over The Limit is May 20.  Randy Orton is gonna be there.
5.  Aaron Relic & Jay Hatton vs.  RYBACK
–  Relic and Hatton get mic time to tell us 2 is greater than 1.  Not when RYBACK is involved.  Boot to the chest of Relic and a powerslam in one motion.  Hatton wants no part of this business.  CLOTHESLINE about decapitates Hatton.  Crowd chants GOLDBERG GOLDBERG GOLDBERG!  RYBACK with the running fireman’s carry slam finishes it @ 1:50.  
–  Backstage, Matt Striker is with CM Punk.  Crowd goes BANANA!  Punk says Jericho is a sad man and he will enjoy the hangover he give Jericho tomorrow.
6.  Chris Jericho vs.  CM Punk
–  Jericho in black Wranglers.  Punk comes out in blue Wranglers.  Punk starts by kicks a mudhole in Jericho.  He clotheslines Jericho in the time keeper’s area.  Punk with a kendo stick and nails Jericho with it. Jericho bails to the outside and Punk clotheslines him back inside.  Punk props a chair in the corner and Jericho hides behind the referee.  Poke to the eyes and enziguiri by Jericho.  Jericho with a springboard dropkick and sends Punk off the apron.  Punk is tossed over into the time keeper area again.  Jericho throws him back in the ring.  He rips the turnbuckle pad off.  Punk is up and chops Jericho.  Jericho and Punk brawl to the floor.  Jericho beats on Punk in front of his sister and she slaps him in the face.  Jericho goes after her and Punk goes crazy.  He slams Jericho through the top part of the announce table.  Punk goes for a piledriver and Jericho backdrops him on the floor.  Jericho breaks the rest of the wood top of the table over Punk’s back.  Back inside, Punk suplexes Jericho down.  Michael Cole gets a crack in at Booker’s commentary.  Booker is at a loss on the fly.  Jericho is up and wears out Punk with a kendo stick. Small package by Punk gets 2 and Jericho clotheslines him back down for 2.  Jericho stops for a beer under the ring.  He pours it all over Punk.  He grabs a second beer and chugs it.  Punk kicks him in the stomach and nails him with a kendo stick to the ribs.  Flying bulldog out of the corner for Punk.  Punk is on the top and Jericho crotches him.  He tries to superplex Punk and gets knocked back down to the mat.  Savage Elbow off the top gets 2.5.  GTS attempted and Jericho fights out.  Bulldog by Jericho.  He attempts the Lionsault and Punk puts him on his shoulders.  Punk lifts for the GTS and Jericho jumps off.  He sends Punk into the chair in the corner.  Roll up by Jericho gets 2.5.  Now Walls of Jericho locked in and Punk makes the ropes.  Punk grabs a fire extinguisher and sprays Jericho in the face.  Punk nails him in the ribs with it now.  Jericho rolls to the outside and Punk kicks him in the face onto the Spanish Announce Table.  Punk heads up to the top rope.  He stumbles but catches himself.  ELBOW OFF THE TOP THROUGH THE TABLE!  They rolls back in and Punk covers for 2.8!!  ANACONDA VICE IS LOCKED IN!  Jericho grabs the kendo stick and splits it over the head of Punk.  CODEBREAKER ON THE CHAIR BY JERICHO!  Cover gets 2.99999!  Jericho lifts Punk for the GTS.  Punk counters and sends Jericho to the exposed turnbuckle.  GTS on Jericho and Punk wins it @ 25:14.  (A BRUTAL match for both men.  Enjoyed this one just as much as the DB/Sheamus match.  Back and forth, slow build, emotion; it had it all.  A.)
–  Post match, Punk goes in the crowd and celebrates with friends and family.  WWE reminds up to not try this at home.  We see footage of Santino beating the Miz earlier tonight.  
–  Backstage, The Bellas say that Beth can’t compete tonight.  Eve walks up and says she isn’t medically cleared but she found a replacement.
7.  Nikki Bella (with Brie Bella) vs.  Layla
–  Thought Kharma was coming out but this works.  Nikki gets kicked back as Layla goes up the the second rope.  Brie pushes her off the rope and Nikki with a spinning toe hold.  Back suplex by Nikki and Layla rolls on top for 2.  Brie rolls in and Neckbreaker by Layla win the title @ 2:28.  (DUD)
–  Backstage, Matt Striker asks John Laurinaitis what he talked with Triple H about.  All he says is business and plugs #PEOPLEPOWER.
–  We preview the main event.  
8.  Jimmy Johns presents…Brock Lesnar vs.  John Cena
–  Bell rings and Brock clotheslines Cena down.  Thunderous rights and an elbow busts Cena open already!  Cena pushes him off and Brock clotheslines him back down.  Doctors come back in to wipe him down.  Cena pushes the ref down and Brock just continues to blast Cena in the head.  Charles Robinson is on Brock’s back and Brock knees Cena in the ribs to the floor.  Doctor comes back in and Cena shoves him away.  Cena lifts him for the AA and Brock with three Rolling Germans.  Cena elbows Brock back into the referee and Charles Robinson no longer a factor as Brock continues to punish Cena.  Brock now works the arm of Cena.  He grabs Cena’s chain that he brought to the ring with him.  He chains Cena’s legs together.  Cena stands up and Brock clotheslines him back down.  Cena hung upside down on the ring post and Brock just pounds the hell out of him.  Cena is let loose and he gets up.  He fights back with Brock and Brock just tosses him into the ringsteps.  Brock grabs Robinson by one hand and tosses him back in the ring.  Cena lifts Brock for the AA and Brock jumps out…F5 and Cena’s leg nails Robinson.  AHHHHH THE HUMANITY!!!!!!!!  Another referee runs in and Brock gets 2.5.  Brock lays out the referee and grabs the ringsteps.  Cena fights back and Brock locks in a Kimoura submission on the arm of Cena.  Cena lifts Brock and drops him on the steel steps!  Cena heads up top misses the Leg Drop off the top rope.  Cena rolls outside the ring.  Brock taunts him standing on the ring steps in the ring.  Cena on the apron, Brock takes off and nails Cena with a kick and they both fall over the top to the floor!!!!!  Brock pops up and laughs it off!  Cena up again for the same spot…CENA NAILS HIM IN THE HEAD WITH THE CHAIN!!!!  BROCK IS BUSTED OPEN!!!!!!!!  Cena lifts Brock and AA ON THE RINGSTEPS!  CENA WINS @ 17:41!!  (This was just a stiff brawl from the get-go.  I liked how they worked the match. Brock still looks strong.  Cena looked like an underdog and got the win at the end with little offense.  B+.)
–  Cena grabs a mic and says he may be going away for a while and his boss may not like what he is saying. He thanks the fans and says this was the right town to do it in.  He leaves the ring in visible pain as the show ends.
–  Top to bottom a great card on paper.  Some matches didn’t hit home but the 3 main matches were WELL worth it!  A lot of complaining I hear about the decision to let Cena go over if he is leaving, but I think it is done right.  “But why should Cena go over if he was just leaving?  It makes Brock look weak!”  Well, if that’s the case, then Cena should go over at Wrestlemania, right?  Very happy with Cena winning.  Very happy with Punk winning.  And I can deal with Sheamus going over.  They gotta milk this proverbial cow (Daniel Bryan) for all it’s worth.  Happy with this show, one of the best shows of 2012, so far.  See you Thursday for Impact.