–Tony Schiavone and Bobby Heenan are doing commentary and they are live from Baltimore, Maryland.
–Footage of Dustin Rhodes and Hacksaw Jim Duggan struggling to beat up the Stud Stable on WCW Pro is shown.
–Gene Okerlund and Bobby Heenan are the studio hosts. They discuss Ric Flair wanting to confront Nick Bockwinkel on the next episode of WCW Saturday Night.
–Eric Bischoff and Bobby Heenan are doing commentary and they are live from Atlanta, Georgia. According to thehistoryofwwe.com, the show drew a packed crowd of 785, with no one having to pay for their ticket.
–Gene Okerlund; in the heel locker room with Avalanche, the Butcher, Colonel Robert Parker, the Blacktop Bully, Bunkhouse Buck, and Meng; urges fans to call 1-900-370-3WCW to vote for who they wish to see wrestle in the main event. The calls cost ninety-nine cents. The babyface locker room, where Tony Schiavone is, features Sting, Hacksaw Jim Duggan, the Guardian Angel, and Dustin Rhodes.
ECW On Sci-Fi #81 12/25/2007
This is a retrospective episode with highlights of Lashley’s feud with The McMahons, New Breed vs. Originals and Morrison vs. Punk. It ends with with Tazz kicking Joey Styles into a Christmas Tree so this GIF saved you an hour.
At Backlash, Vince McMahon won the ECW Title in a handicap match from Bobby Lashley. I remember this annoying a lot of people, even in the yeah-I’m-a-smark-and-read-the-pre-taped-results-and-watch-the-show-anyway crowd were up in arms about the DISRESPECT TO ECW’S LEGACY so well done Vince.
Welp, I was wrong. Backlash is THIS Sunday so instead of Lashley/Vince we start with a recap of CM Punk ”accidentally” throwing a chair into the ring to help Rob Van Dam knacker Elijah Burke. Punk apologises to The New Breed individually before leaving Burke hanging. Punk comes back smiling, saying he’s just teasing. Burke scowls because he’s seen Transformers and hates Starscream.
We’re in London, England and the main event is announced straight away as ECW Originals vs. The New Breed in an elimination tag match.
This is the episode after Wrestlemania 23 so let’s have a quick look at the relevant bits: ECW on Sci-Fi’s CM Punk was involved in the Money In The Bank opener but ended up being the guy Ken Kennedy bashed off a ladder to win the briefcase. Some stuff happened with Kennedy’s MITB, but he’s not in ECW so fuck him.
Dramatic recap of Bobby Lashley becoming the first person to break Chris Masters’ Masterlock, something that went unbroken for two years as Operation: Get Lashley The Fuck Over continues. Masters isn’t happy so he’s wrestling Lashley in a real match tonight, right here in Cleveland, Ohio.
Recap of Vince picking Umaga for the Battle of The Billionaires and Trump choosing Lashley. It made sense from a storyline perspective as Vince was messing with ECW, even though Vince’s issue was with the old guys from the original company. So I guess what I’m trying to say is Trump should have chosen The Sandman.
Tonight it’s OH FOR FUCK’S SAKE Lashley vs. Holly again. Lashley’s beaten him three consecutive times but he gets another title shot. Oh and it’s in a Steel Cage because adding Ranch to stale bread makes it edible.
edit: well I don’t know what’s happened here but the GIFs and images aren’t showing. Bare with me.
edit 2: I’m using Chrome like I always do and I can’t see anything, ditto on Firefox. Apparently some can see this on other browsers, I’m not doing anything different than normal so I’ve no idea.
We’re in Seattle, Wa. (waaaaah?) and Lashley starts the show to a booming reaction. It’s Extreme Rules and he’s wrestling…Holly? Not Snitsky then, the guy who attacked him last week? Aye well OK then.
Sorry about no recap last week, went up to Glasgow for ICW’s biggest ever show and due to bad management I had no time to watch an episode of a C-show from nearly ten years ago. Er I mean ”in the spirit of the original ECW I decided to take the show off the air for a week due to the controversy of er…Sandman smoking indoors. Yeah that’ll work.”
We’re joined mid-Sandman entrance so you know it’s a serious episode. Oh never mind, it’s a Battle Royal because the Royal Rumble is this Sunday.
It’s the last ECW of 2006 and…it’s a Best Of. Oh. Styles and Tazz present highlights of Cena vs. RVD, RVD vs. Show, Extreme Strip Poker (what?), Extreme Elimination Chamber, Lashley winning the title and the three-way from last week. At the end, Tazz gives Joey a Christmas present.
Styles: ”Are you sure? It says ”Michael Cole” on the label…and it’s ticking?”
Bobby Lashley and his incredibly generic theme music start the show. All respect to Jim Johnston but he’d been on borrowed time for years and I’m glad we know have CFO$. He grabs the mic. I’ve changed my mind, put his music back on.
We’re in Buffalo, New York with no opening and December To Dismember is THIS SUNDAY NIGHT. Oh. Paul Heyman starts the show putting over the EXTREEEME Elimination Chamber. ”Inside the chamber it’s total anarchy” etc. He introduces the weapons that are going to be used in the Chamber and that takes a lot away from Heyman’s spiel as he gives us a chair, a crowbar (which gets an ironic ”holy shit” chant) and a table. What a weird way to sell a supposedly unique match by filling it with normal weapons. Oh and there’s a barbed wire baseball bat too, which makes the crowd chant ”we want fire” because it’s New York.
We’re in Manchester, England (looks like the 02 Arena but by the time you’ve read this it’ll have changed it’s name again. Probably the Angry Birds Arena by now). Tazz is recovering from knee surgery so Elijah Burke joins Joey Styles on commentary. It’s where he’d end up ten years later and it means he’s not wrestling so good call.
Paul Heyman reminds us Rob Van Dam defeated Big Show in a ladder match to win a title shot whenever he wanted. RVD has chosen December To Dismember but Heyman has the right to choose the type of match so he makes it an EXTREEEME Elimination Chamber match. Ah, so that’s how we ended up with that. Heyman was trying to fuck over RVD but missed and hit the fans instead.
Tonight’s main event is The Big Show & Test vs. Rob Van Dam & Hardcore Holly. It’s Halloween so everything’s in Spooky Vision.
Tonight it’s EXTREEEME TITTIES as we get ready for ECW Strip Poker. WWE did a better job of hyping this segment than anything else on the show, they may as well have had Lex Luger drive his Express around the country shouting ”Get ready for tits!” out the window. Because posting screenshots of women in their bikinis gets Scott into trouble with the site hosts, here’s the presenter instead:
”I promise you one of these Divas WILL get naked” Balls Mahoney tells us, right before auditioning for the role of Fagin in a Philly Production of Oliver Twist.
We’re in Arkansa and we have The Sandman & Sabu vs. The Big Show & Matt Striker. Oh.
We’re live at Madison Square Garden and instead of a main event graphic, we get Paul Heyman on the mic. He sucks up to the crowd and they buy it until Heyman swerves them. I take it they’ve not been watching this show then? Heyman thanks himself, mocks the crowd for wanting RVD & Sabu and tells them they’re all welcome for his success. ECW was all Heyman’s ideas and vision, dammit. Sabu has enough of this and bum-rushes the ring. Paul does a wobbly runner so Sabu kills Generic Security Number One with an Arabian Facebuster. Heyman’s not happy so he makes it Sabu vs. Big Show EXTREEEME RULES for the ECW title tonight. Wait why would you give someone a title match as a punishment? And the one good thing this show has done the last few months is emphasise how Sabu has the advantage when objects are involved. Huh. Anyway Sabu dives on the security guys to end the segment (and logic) as the commentators flip their lids about how the ECW Title is being defended on the holy grounds of Madison Square etc.
And here’s the big graphic!
Hype video for the McMahons & ECW Champ Big Show vs. D-X in Hell In A Cell at Unforgiven 2006. At least they’re entertaining:
HBK: Is this the place?
*HHH sees ECW shirts*
HHH: Bingo! This is the place!
Two days ago the ECW Title was defended at Summerslam 2006 (the first time the Title was defended on WWE PPV) so we’ll have a look at that.
Thought it was interesting Sabu & Show have different images for different brands. Got to love the Photoshop’d Title on Show and the URGH GRITTY filter for ECW:
Sorry about the delay, went travelling to see Chikara and forgot time causes days to change. Eddie Kingston attacked me so it was worth it.
Due to Rob Van Dam causing a no-contest in last week’s Kurt Angle vs. Sabu match, tonight we are cruelly teased with a three-way ladder match to declare the number one contender to Big Show’s ECW Title. Sure enough, Heyman tells us two days ago Angle tore his groin (yet was still able to win the match) and as such has been medically suspended. It must have been a groin pull the likes of which you’ve never seen before in your life.
So instead it’s Sabu vs. RVD in a ladder match. I’ve included that match twice in Botchamania and could probably do play-by-play with my eyes closed. Then again, it’s not hard typing ”and they fuck something else up” a dozen times.
Last show’s Dreamer & Sandman vs. Knox & Test match. Oh sorry if you’re reading this in 2016 I mean Sandreamer vs. Knest.
Tonight it’s Sabu vs. Kurt Angle in a Number One Contenders Match. Nothing good comes from this match.