All I have to say is watch this video to get the real scoop of what happened backstage at the 2015 Rumble
The SmarK Rant for WWE Royal Rumble 2015 Live from Philadelphia, PA, home of ECW and King of the Ring 95. Your hosts are Michael Cole, JBL & Jerry Lawler The New Age Outlaws v. The Ascension The circle of life continues, as the Outlaws originally got themselves over by busting on the LOD, and now they’re the old fogies defending the honor of the previous fogies. On the bright side, the Ascension can always say they lasted longer than the Public Enemy. Apparently we’re supposed to use “#tagteamtitles” for this match, which probably earned Cole a stern yelling. The crowd lets the NAO know that they’ve still got it, which is a very generous assessment of their talents. The Outlaws work Konor over and Dogg drops the knee while JBL tells the tale of Bob Armstrong v. Buddy Colt. Bradshaw is so fucking old now. Dogg gets caught in the corner and pounded as we’re already well over the point of exposure for these clowns. Speaking of exposure, closeups of Billy Gunn’s face in HD in 2015 is a BAD IDEA. We get some chinlocks on Dogg until he fights them off and gets the hot tag to Billy, but the fameasser misses and the Fall of Man finishes at 5:22. Shit match to start the show and really the supposed world-beating monsters should have obliterated the old geezers. ½* Meanwhile, after two commercials and a RAW recap, HHH and Stephanie ponder the whereabouts of Sting. Apparently the crap he got away with in WCW won’t fly here. I bet he used to rappel in and just use ice packs WHENEVER HE WANTED. Fucker. Paul Heyman interrupts and offers Brock as the solution to their problems. WWE tag titles: The Usos v. The Miz & Mizdow Finally, a fresh matchup! Mizdow is of course over huge as a babyface. The Usos double-team Miz to start and we get the wacky Mizdow stuff, which Cole makes sure to explain in detail to kill the joke. Miz necks Jimmy on the middle rope to take over and goes to the chinlock while teasing a tag with Mizdow. Backbreaker gets two. It’s really weird that they’ve actually corrupted the original joke so much, in that Miz was originally trying to avoid doing any work and has now shifted to doing ALL the work himself, which is a point they’ve never made for some reason. Miz showboats and allows Jimmy to tag out to Jey, but Miz rolls him up for two. Short DDT gets two. Jey comes back with an enzuigiri to put Miz on the floor, but Miz sacrifices Mizdow to block a dive. Back in, Jey misses the flying splash and Miz gets two. Jey superkicks him and hits another splash, but Mizdow saves. Skull Crushing Finale gets two, although Mizdow hit the move so it might not have had all the impact it should. Miz and Jey fight on the top, which results in a top rope powerbomb and splash to retain at 9:23. Finish was really flat, as the match built weird with the Miz-Mizdow stuff screwing up the tag formula. Good action otherwise. **3/4 Meanwhile, J&J Security play video games in the back like a couple of lazy millennials, annoying Seth Rollins. The Bella Twins v. Paige & Natalya Apparently this is stemming from something on Total Divas. I’m guessing Paige turned babyface at some point? Because reasons? Frankly I’m still not even clear on why the Bellas are back together in the first place. The Bellas work Nat over as the commentary is already getting derailed into stupidity, before the match even has a chance to die. Paige and Natalya with a double suplex on Brie for two and then the crowd gets bored and starts chanting for Sami Zayn. Nattie gets worked over in the corner while Cole recaps the thrilling storyline on Total Divas. Because I’m sure all the 40 year old housewives watching that show decided to order Royal Rumble. Not to mention they basically ignore 90% of the show anyway. We get a whole bunch of chinlocks on Nattie and a sad spot with Brie yelling “Brie mode!” before hitting a running knee for two, as no one cares about what Brie Mode is. More chinlocks and Nikki misses a blind charge, but Brie trips Paige off the apron and Nikki pins Nattie off a forearm at 8:18. THAT was the finish? * Yay, more commercials. WWE World title: Brock Lesnar v. John Cena v. Seth Rollins The crowd gloriously resurrects singing “John Cena sucks” in time with his music and then gives Brock a hero’s welcome by contrast. Brock immediately suplexes Cena and then takes out J&J to get at Rollins. So everyone gets suplexed multiple times and Brock tries the kimura on Cena, but Cena powers out. FU on Brock and Rollins gets one off that, but Brock just dumps both guys and we head to the floor. Back in, Cena comes back on Rollins, but sadly Lesnar is in fact able to see John and kills him with another suplex. Rollins dumps Brock and Cena slams Rollins for two, but Seth comes back with a Blockbuster for two. Rollins gets rid of Cena, but dives at Brock and gets caught in an F5 for two. Well that was ill-advised. Brock preps the table, but walks into three straight FUs, which gets two for Cena. Rollins with the curbstomp for two on Lesnar. Brock takes a breather and Cena tackles him through the barricade and then sends him into the stairs. Come on, you have to freeze him and then dump him in molten metal to really finish him off. So Rollins puts him on the announce table and drops an elbow from the top rope onto him as this match turns into a complete video game. In the best way, of course. Back in, Rollins cradles Cena for two and superkicks him for two. Cena comes back with a powerbomb for two while Heyman screams for a doctor. Cena and Rollins fight on the top, and Seth brings him down with a powerbomb into the opposite turnbuckles, for two. Cena reverses the curbstomp into the STF, but J&J make the save. Triple powerbomb on Cena gets two. Cena gets rid of Rollins and does his customary beating on J&J while Brock gets put on a stretcher, and the FU gets two on Rollins. Slugfest and Rollins gets an enzuigiri and curbstomp for two. And then Brock makes a miracle comeback, destroys both guys with suplexes, and F5s Rollins to retain at 22:40. So yeah, I guess we’re getting Brock v. Reigns. Thankfully the match delivered what the crowd wanted and showed Seth could hang on the main event stage. ****1/2 Royal Rumble: Miz is #1 and R-Truth is #2. Oh man, the final explosion of Awesome Truth! They fight on the apron early and Truth gets a leg lariat, but goes up and gets crotched…and Bubba Ray Dudley is #3. He’s looking a bit fatter than his TNA run. Bubba and Truth debut the What’s Up Drop and Bubba sends Truth to get the tables. And then they hit Miz with 3D and toss him at 4:00. Luke Harper is #4 as Bubba tosses Truth at 4:15. Bray Wyatt is #5 and thankfully cuts his entrance short, and the Wyatt Family reunites to beat up Bubba. The crowd wants D-Von, but Bubba is thrown out at 6:57. Well so much for that. Bray and Luke decide to team up as Curtis Axel is #6. And Rowan emerges to destroy him and take his place, and we get a three-way Wyatt fight. You have to be pretty low on the totem pole to get punked out by Rowan. Bray tosses both Wyatt geeks at 8:50 anyway to clear the ring. Boogeyman is #7. Really? This is the bottom of the barrel we’re scraping for surprise appearances now? So Bray quickly tosses this loser at 11:05. Sin Cara is #8 as the parade of jobbers continues. Cara gets some offense but walks into Sister Abigail and gets tossed at 12:18. Bray stops to preach to us and Zack Ryder is #9. Apparently Zack has been out with surgery for months. How would we ever know the difference? Zack gets his sad offensive flurry and then gets tossed at 14:01. Daniel Bryan is #10 as we finally get star power here. Bryan immediately runs wild on Bray with dropkicks in the corner and goes up with a rana as Fandango is #11. The New and Improved Fandango! Or is that a thing still? Bryan headkicks him into an airplane spin, but can’t get him out. Tyson Kidd is #12 and gets to run wild on everyone, but collides with Bryan and everyone is out. Stardust is #13 and they’re acting like it’s Cody’s Rumble debut. What? Bryan suplexes Tyson out at 21:06 and then dumps Bray through the ropes before following with a dive. DDP returns to the WWE at #14 and Stardust immediately punks him out. And that results in a Diamond Cutter. Fandango goes up and gets crotched and DDP hits a Diamond Cutter from the top on him. Bray also takes one and Rusev is #15. Rusev casually blocks the Cutter and tosses DDP at 24:31. Fandango at 24:38. Bryan hits both heels with a missile dropkick and throws kicks, but Rusev puts him down and Bray tosses him at 25:35. Uh oh. This is gonna get ugly. Goldust is #16 and you can tell they’ve deflated the crowd like Tom Brady’s football. Stardust tries to toss his brother and the crowd just ignores the match and chants for Daniel Bryan, booing EVERYONE. Kofi Kingston is #17 and they boo him too. This is some awesome sour grapes. YOU’RE GONNA GET ROMAN REIGNS AND LIKE IT, PHILLY! Adam Rose is #18 and the Rosebuds catch a flying Kofi and save him. And then they ignore Rose flying out at 30:33. And then Rusev eliminates Kofi at 30:49 anyway. I’m glad they at least did the crowd surf spot before killing the Rose character off. Roman Reigns is #19 and the crowd is PISSED. They are NOT buying in on this one. This man is being sent out there to die. Reigns cleans house and dumps Goldust at 32:37 and Stardust at 32:38. It’s Bootista time as the crowd turns on the match. Big E is #20 and the crowd can’t even be bothered to boo him. No, wait, they can. Everyone stands around punching each other and Mizdow is #21 and he’s the one guy who at least the crowd spares. And then Miz sends him back and takes his spot, so Roman shoves him out and Mizdow goes in after all. And then Rusev tosses him right away at 36:03. So the crowd turns on the match again. Jack Swagger is #22 and no one cares about that either. Swaggerbomb on Reigns and then it’s back to standing around and kicking. Ryback is #23 and goes after Rusev, but can’t put him out. Now the crowd wants CM Punk. Kane is #24 as the ring piles up with stiffs with nothing going on. Dean Ambrose is #25 and we’ll see what stupid way he eliminates himself. Philly is willing to back him in his quest to make this match not suck. Titus O’Neil is #26. Well that won’t help. The Shield reunites to dump him at 43:38. Bad News Barrett is lucky #27. So that leaves Big Show, Dolph Ziggler and someone else. More nothing going on with dead weight piled up. The match basically died off with Reigns. Cesaro is #28 and he gets some offense on Ambrose and Big gets Rusev’d at 48:23. Big Show is #29 and he dumps Ryback at 49:33. Swagger at 49:40. And Dolph Ziggler is #30, so we’re getting Reigns winning this dog. Dolph tosses Barrett at 51:01, but walks into the Giant Swing. Cesaro can’t put him out, however. They slug it out on the apron and Ziggler supkerkicks him out at 52:01. And then Show just punches him out and tosses him at 52:47. Kane and Show dump Bray at 53:17, leaving a Final Four of Show, Kane, Ambrose and Reigns. We do the big slugfest and the crowd shits all over it. Superman Punch for Show, but Reigns runs into a big boot from Kane. Dean gets dumped at 55:13 like a geek, leaving Reigns alone. And the crowd just SAVAGELY turns on the match, booing Reigns’ comeback. Kane and Big Show turn on each other and the crowd is just booing this whole mess with a wall of white noise, and Reigns dumps both to win at 57:15. And the crowd BOOS HIM OUT OF THE BUILDING! Holy fuck. There was literally zero reaction to him winning. Kane and Show beat on him afterwards, but The Rock makes the save, momentarily redeeming this mess, before the crowd goes back to booing Reigns again. And then Rusev returns, having never been eliminated, and Reigns tosses him out to win for real at 59:48. And the crowd still boos him. WORST RUMBLE EVER. At least 1999 had trainwreck appeal. This was just boring. ** The Pulse This show is gonna be legendary for all the wrong reasons. Thumbs way down.
year, Batista entered late and won the thing much to the chagrin of the
WWE Universe. This year, I’m not quite sure WWE is ready to make
another stupid mistake.
- Team Cesaro defeats New Day.
- The Usos SHOULD beat Team Miz. I’m tired of this angle. We’ve seen it.
- The Ascension beats the New Age Outlaws and I cannot believe we’re having that match.
Cena beats Lesnar and Rollins. Heyman turns on Lesnar, screwing Lesnar
over. Lesnar attacks Cena and Rollins gets the strap with the MITB
case…tho, I’d prefer it if Rollins won the next night on RAW, but
- Nattie and Paige should win this thing.
- Roman Reigns wins the Royal Rumble because WWE just sucks balls.
Also, The Rock is here — and that’s added some drama to this thing.
Let’s see what happens…
We start with a bunch of Superstars telling us what the Royal Rumble means to them.
We are LIVE(!!!) from the Wells Fargo Center in Philadelphia!!!
JBL, Cole and King are on the mics.
MATCH #1: New Age Outlaws (“Road Dogg” Jesse James & “Badass” Billy Gunn) vs. The Ascension (Konnor & Viktor)
and Viktor start and the fact that this match isn’t over yet is
aggravating. James hip tosses Viktor after a series of counters. Tag to
Dogg. Viktor tags Konnor but Dogg does his series of goofy moves.
FINALLY, the new guys beat up on Dogg and Viktor gets a tag. Headlock by
Viktor. Dogg fights out but gets thrown to the mat. Viktor drops an
elbow and Konnor is tagged in and he works over Dogg as JBL tries to
tell us that “a win over The Outlaws will mean a step up the ladder for
these guys.” Dogg eventually makes a tag to Gunn and he takes both
members, tossing Konnor outside. Gut Wrench on Viktor, but Gunn misses
a Fame-Asser. The Ascension hits The Fall of Man at 5:27 and the crowd
just hates it.
WINNERS: The Ascension via Push Prank
RATING: *1/2. Why this couldn’t have been on the pre-show is beyond me.
Cole runs us through last Monday when Sting appeared on RAW.
H and Steph are backstage. Steph is worried about Sting. She asks where
he hides all the time. Wasn’t he in the dressing room? Triple H doesn’t
get it: everyone was talking about Nikolai Volkoff being here but Sting
is mentioned and nobody cares. Triple H says it doesn’t matter — he’s
gonna destroy Sting. Paul Heyman shows up. Steph says she never invited
him in here. Heyman says he can go and take his problems with him but
he’s here to solve their problems. Heyman says he has the solution to Sting: Brock Lesnar.
#VOLKOFFWINSTHERUMBLE – let’s get that trending.
#2: The Miz & Damien Miz-dow (challengers) vs. The Usos (Jimmy
& Jey) (champions) for the WWE Tag Team Championship
and Miz start this out. Crowd chants for Miz-dow but Miz isn’t having
it and chews them out. Jey chops at Miz, then they botch a Demolition
Decapitation. Two count. Jimmy chops at Miz and ends up in the corner.
Miz hits a Miz-line. Jimmy attacks and puts Miz on the buckle. Miz-dow
imitates this. Miz gets hit coming off the buckle and Miz-dow imitates
that too. Jimmy hits a kneelift on Miz but Miz sends Jimmy into the
ropes, neck-first. Crowd still wants Miz-dow but Miz won’t tag. Miz hits
the Back and Neckbreaker and gets two. Miz-dow wants a tag again and
Miz puts his hand out. Miz-dow goes for the tag but Miz moves his hand.
Hot tag to Jey and he’s all over Miz. Samoan Drop and Rikishi Splash.
Series of roll-ups get two each and Miz hits a quick DDT for two.
Miz-dow comes in and gets dumped outside. Miz does too. It’s a Flying
Uso by Jimmy and Jey and there are Bodies Everywhere™. Back in the ring,
Jey misses the Superfly Splash. Miz hits the SCF — but only gets two.
Crowd is hot for Miz-dow but Miz just beats Jey in the corner. Miz goes
for a Miz-Line but Jey hits a Supkick and Superfly Splash. TWO COUNT as
Miz-dow makes a save. Jimmy attacks but Miz-dow dumps him, then hits the
SCF on Jey…Miz crawls over — and NEARLY gets the fall. Miz-dow
cannot believe it. Miz pulls Jey up on the buckle for a Superplex but
Jey fights out of it. Miz-dow goes after Jey but Jey kicks him. Jimmy
suddenly gets up and tags himself in. Jey tries a Powerbomb but Miz
won’t let go of the ropes. Jimmy Superkicks Miz, then hits the Superfly
Splash and the Usos retain at 9:25.
WINNERS: The Usos
**3/4. Barely passable. Look, use Miz-dow or have him turn already.
This gimmick and feud are like beating the bones of a dead horse.
We get a status recap from the WWE CNN News Desk of Doom.
Mercury is playing Immortals: The Game Which Takes WWE Superstars Into a
Supernatural Realm in a Mortal Kombat Rip-Off. Jamie Noble tells him to
stop. Rollins comes in and tells them that he wants them focused. He’s
not “The Future”. He’s “The Right Now”. TRENDING!!!
MATCH #3: The Bella Twins (Nikki & Brie) vs. Natalya & Paige
and Paige start out. Nikki hits uppercuts. Paige comes back with a kick
to the gut. Tag to Nattie and the two double team Nikki, tossing her to
the mat. Nikki gets to Brie to make the tag but Nattie lifts her up and
tags Paige and they hit a delayed standing double suplex. Paige goes
for Dry Hump Pin and gets a one count. Paige smashes Brie in the face
with some knees and tags Nattie. Kinda. Nobody knows what the fuck is
going on. Paige is the legal woman in the ring. In any case, Paige
Superkicks Brie and gets a one count. The crowd starts doing Euro
Football chants as Brie seems to botch a side suplex. Tag to Nikki who
puts a headlock on Nattie. Nattie escapes but Nikki puts her to the mat
for two, then struts around the ring. Tag to Brie who hits a running
lariat. Two count. Brie applies the Chinlock of Doom. Nattie fights out
but gets hung up on the ropes for the Brie Mode Knee Smash. Tag to Nikki
and it’s a double team and a nice body toss using their legs. Nikki
goes for Head Scissors but Nattie gets to her feet and drops Nikki
backwards. Nikki tries for a leglock but Nattie reverses for the
Sharpshooter. Nikki kicks out and misses a corner splash. Nattie tries a
tag but Brie yanks Paige off the mat. Nikki just levels Nattie with a
forearm. Pin at 8:04.
WINNERS: The Bella Twins
**. This was uninteresting from the start and remained so. No Bella
Twin turn, no Paige/Nattie friction. Nothing doing. Just filler.
We get a nice shot of the Wells Fargo Center.
like Roman Reigns, Stardust, Goldust, Rusev, Miz, Miz-dow, Big Show,
Fandango, and Daniel Bryan. They’re all ready to win. Dammit, we still
have four minutes until 6 PM. Let’s hear from the 72 other superstars in
WWE and NXT…
We get the build-up for the Triple Threat Match for the WWE World Heavyweight Championship.
#4: John Cena (challenger) vs. Seth Rollins (challenger) (w/ Jamie
Noble & Joey Mercury) vs. Brock Lesnar (champions) (w/ Paul Heyman)
in a Triple Threat Match for the WWE World Heavyweight Championship
– trending! Cena and Lesnar go right after Rollins. He bails and Lesnar
hits a German on Cena, then goads Rollins to come into the ring.
Another German on Cena and Rollins runs into the ring. Lesnar grabs him
for an F5 but J&J come into the ring. J&J get a German each.
Rollins gets one. Cena gets #3. Heyman just smiles. Lesnar hits a
suplex, then turns to Rollins. German #2. Lesnar just suplexes Cena and
Rollins. Rollins rolls out of the ring, so Lesnar turns to Cena and
locks in the Kimura. Cena gets to his knees, then to his feet. Rollins
hits a Springboard kneedrop from the outside, knocking both men down,
then goes to work on Lesnar, kicking at him. Lesnar fights back. Cena
attacks Lesnar. Double Suplex to Lesnar by Rollins and Cena. Cena hits a
quick AA on Lesnar but Rollins dumps him outside. One count by Rollins.
And the fight spills outside. The crowd loves it.
chases Rollins back in and it’s Moves 1 through 3. He tries the 5KS but
Rollins kicks at him. Series of counters and it’s #3 again by Cena.
Lesnar comes in and hits German #4 and #5 on Cena. Rollins superkicks
Lesnar in the head to stop the massacre, then hits a knee to Lesnar.
Cena hits a Falling Powerbomb to Rollins and nearly gets a fall. Rollins
hits a nice Reverse Neckbreaker off the ropes for two. Lesnar gets back
into the ring, works over Rollins, then dumps him. Cena attacks Lesnar
and hits a nice clothesline, knocking Lesnar down. Rollins pulls him out
of the ring and leaps at Lesnar who hits an F5 out of nowhere. He
NEARLY gets a fall but Cena saves the match. Lesnar hits German #6 to
Cena, then looks around the ring. He goes outside and takes apart the
Spanish desk, then goes for Cena who hits THREE AA’s and NEARLY gets the
fall. Rollins pulls him out of the ring.
gets into the ring and hits a Curb Stomp! NEAR fall. Cena saves it.
Lesnar rolls out of the ring and gets to his feet. Cena comes running
over and knocks him into the Timekeeper’s pit. Cena gets to his feet and
tosses Lesnar into the steel steps. Lesnar gets to his feet and Cena
clocks him in the head with the steps. Rollins kicks at Cena from inside
the ring. Lesnar ends up on the Spanish Table…ho boy. Rollins goes
top rope and hits Lesnar with an elbow into the table. Cena gets to
Rollins as the crowd is at THIS IS AWESOME levels. Cena rolls Rollins
into the ring as Lesnar is dead outside. Cena goes to pick him up but
Rollins rolls him up for a close fall. Rollins flies at Cena who catches
him for an AA. Rollins breaks it and tries a Frankensteiner — but Cena
reverses into a Powerbomb! TWO COUNT. Holy shit.
tend to Lesnar as Cena puts Rollins up for a Superplex. Rollins rakes
Cena’s eyes and hits a Turnbuckle Powerbomb for two. Cena kicks out of
his pin and locks in the STF — and J&J come running in to take out
Cena. Triple Powerbomb by the three guys and it’s a two-count. Rollins
gets the MITB case but misses his swing. He goes flying from the ring.
J&J enter the ring and Cena hits a Double AA, then hits an AA for a
CLOSE FALL. Wow. Both men get up and Cole tells us that Lesnar “has a
broken rib”. Cena tries an AA but Rollins hits an Enzuguri and Curb
Stomp. Two count. Rollins gets to his feet and goes top rope with a 450
Splash! Lesnar bolts into the ring and it’s Germans to both men. He
tries another but Rollins lands on his feet and clocks Lesnar with the
MITB case — twice. He puts Lesnar’s head on the case and goes for a
Curb Stomp but Lesnar stands up and hits the F5 to retain at 22:45.
WINNER AND STILL CHAMPION: Brock Lesnar via F5.
RATING: ****. Not bad at all. ‘Cept, now Lesnar still has the title.
Post-match, everyone is out of it. Rollins can’t believe it and holds onto the case. Lesnar staggers off.
We get the Royal-Rumble-By-the-Numbers montage.
MATCH #5: Royal Rumble
I didn’t think it was
possible to produce a worse Rumble than last year. This year, I have
been proven horribly, unfortunately wrong. Daniel Bryan was in the
Rumble less than a half hour and was eliminated halfway through the
match. WWE had about two more shots to get it right with Dolph Ziggler
or Dean Ambrose — and went with Roman Reigns, the safe, predictable
choice. We had a swerve where The Rock helped Reigns win the Rumble —
who had one more guy to beat ANYHOW because “Rusev was never actually
eliminated”. Of course, neither was Curtis Axel — but who gives a shit
about Axel, right? Anyhow, Reigns wins the match after the Rock’s
interference which makes no sense whatsoever except that The Rock “was
reported to be here”. The crowd booed louder than when Batista won it
last year — and they were already pissed after Bryan exited. On top of
that, the roster is SO dried up, they scraped the barrel for some of
these people: I don’t know about you, but The Boogeyman, Zack Ryder,
Curtis Axel, Sin Cara and Adam Rose don’t get me going. DDP and Bubba
Ray belong here. The forementioned do not. The results (followed by the
person who dumped them) are below.
- The Miz (Bubba Ray)
- R-Truth (Bubba Ray)
- Bubba Ray Dudley (Bray Wyatt)
- Luke Harper (Bray Wyatt)
- Bray Wyatt (Big Show/Kane)
- Curtis Axel (Erick Rowan, I guess)
- The Boogeyman (Bray Wyatt)
- Sin Cara (Bray Wyatt)
- Zack Ryder (Bray Wyatt)
- Daniel Bryan (Bray Wyatt)
- Fandango (Rusev)
- Tyson Kidd (Daniel Bryan)
- Stardust (Roman Reigns)
- Diamond Dallas Page (Rusev)
- Rusev (Roman Reigns)
- Goldust (Roman Reigns)
- Kofi Kingston (Rusev)
- Adam Rose (Rusev)
- Roman Reigns (WINNER)
- Big E (Rusev)
- Damien Miz-dow (Rusev)
- Jack Swagger (Big Show)
- Ryback (Big Show/Kane)
- Kane (Roman Reigns)
- Dean Ambrose (Big Show/Kane)
- Titus O’Neil (Rusev/Ambrose)
- Bad News Barrett (Dolph Ziggler)
- Cesaro (Dolph Ziggler)
- Big Show (Roman Reigns)
- Dolph Ziggler (Kane/Big Show)
*. This show is an absolute example of the bullshit WWE has pulled in
the last year. They had ONE job to do — and they failed miserably.
Reigns celebrates as Triple H and Steph come out to watch.
**. Not even the title match saves this. Not when you consider that the
title will be on a guy who won’t be on TV after tomorrow night. My
advice: have Rollins cash in that case ASAP.
Er, that’s it.
The kickoff show starts at 7pm EST. Matches include:
The rules for this contest are as follows: These are the numbers that were chosen at random. They will match up with the actual WWE numbers and whatever number the entrant of the WWE Rumble winner has, that number will end up winning the contest. For instance, if the winner of the WWE Rumble was the #20 entrant, whoever has #20 in this contest will win and get to pick the shoot interview that I review for this Thursday.
Here are the results of the drawing:
- Handleman 20
- Bulldog Bob Brown
- The Ricker
- Duthtys GoRilla
- Biff Kensington III
- Ghost of Faffner Hall
- Kyle Warne
- John Petuka
- Rodney Rankin
- Bob Patel
- Battle Kat Litter
- Jonathan Meisner
- Dean Andrews
- Darren X
- Average Joe Everyman
- Adam Curry
- Fake Danimal Crossing
- Crikey Mate Down Under
- Logan Scisco
- Danimal Crossing (Real Bro)
- The Whispering Joker
- Grail Ron Swanson
The Royal Rumble the most prestigious battle royal ever devised but what about the title matches that take place on the show, there have been some true classics.
Angle vs Benoit from 2003 and Cena vs Umaga from 2007 instantly spring to mind as being the best but do you have any other favourite title matches which took place at the Rumble?
Good afternoon everyone…it’s Royal Rumble weekend and over at PTBN, we had some Rumble related content as well as some other pieces we feel you would enjoy, so check ’em out!
Aaron George reviewed and ranked all of the Royal Rumble matches: The Definitive Ranking of Royal Rumble Matches
Matt Davis delivers 101 Facts you may or may not have known about the Royal Rumble: 101 Facts You May Not Know About the Royal Rumble
Scott, Justin & Graham Cawthon looked back at Royal Rumble 2004: Place to Be Podcast Episode 358: Royal Rumble 2004
Our Royal Rumble rewind series checked out the 1991 and 1997 installments: Royal Rumble Rewind Series
Dan McGinn previews this Sunday’s event: 2015 Royal Rumble Preview
Charles Williams is back with his weekly This Week in 90s Wrestling column: This Week In 90’s Wrestling: January 18th – 24th
Round Three of the Greatest Song of the 90s Tournament wraps this weekend, so get in and catch up on voting if you haven’t yet: PTBN Greatest Song of the 90s Tournament
Graham Cawthon debuted his History of Wrestling podcast with a look at wrestling memories from the Meadowlands: History of Wrestling Podcast #1: Remembering the Meadowlands
Scott Keith joined the PTB Podcast for another trip through the mailbag: Place to Be Podcast Episode 359: Mailbag with Scott Keith #5
Back in late 1987, the WWF started messing with the NWA’s pay per view
schedule by airing Survivor Series 1987 on the same night as Starrcade
1987. This worked so well that they decided to do it again in January
1988 but as a free special on the USA network. Nearly thirty years
later, the show has become one of the biggest events of the year and
contains one of the most important matches on the Road to Wrestlemania:
the Royal Rumble.
For twenty seven years, the Royal
Rumble has given us the biggest battle royal of the year and some of the
best matches of all time. Ranging from Chris Jericho vs. Chris Benoit
in a ladder match to Triple H vs. Cactus Jack in a street fight to Chris
Benoit vs. Kurt Angle in a technical masterpiece, you’re almost
guaranteed to get a solid title match in addition to the Royal Rumble
In this book, we’ll look at every edition of the Royal
Rumble starting in 1988 and break down every show, segment and match as
WWE starts their Road to Wrestlemania. The book contains twenty seven
pay per view reviews and looks at everything that has taken place at the
first major show of the year on the WWE calendar. As usual I’ll be
providing play by play, historical context and analysis of every show.
books runs about 350 pages on a Kindle and only costs $3.99, or the
equivalent in other currencies. If you don’t have a Kindle or e-book
reader, there are several FREE apps you can use to read it on pretty much any electronic device. You can find those from Amazon here.
You can pick up the book from Amazon here.
From the UK Amazon here.
From the Canadian Amazon here.
Or if you’re in another country with its own Amazon page, just search KB Rumble and my book will be the first thing that pop up.
you can still get any of my previous books on the WWE Championship,
Monday Night Raw from 1998 and 2001, Monday Nitro from 1995-97, In Your
House, Summerslam, Starrcade, ECW Pay Per Views and Clash of the
Champions at my author’s page here.
I hope you like it and shoot me any questions you might have.