ECW On Sci-Fi #78 12/06/2007

Show starts with Matt Striker forcing CM Punk to choose between wrestling either Big Daddy V or Mark Henry tonight. ”C’mon Straight Edge, pick your poison!”

Read moreECW On Sci-Fi #78 12/06/2007

ECW on Sci-Fi #70 10/09/2007

I was going to post some news from Powerslam Magazine but they’re currently in storage so you’ll have to wait two weeks (just like real Powerslam Magazine!) but the important things to know are it’s the show after No Mercy 2007, we’re in Detroit, Michigan and no-one’s died and John Morrison is challenging for Punk’s title tonight after serving his punishment for Wellness Violation.

Read moreECW on Sci-Fi #70 10/09/2007

ECW On Sci-Fi #66 11/09/2007

We’re in Minneapolis, MN and Armando Estrada proudly introduces us to the new ECW Champion: CM Punk. Punk recognises Armando’s brown-nosing and gifts him the new CM Punk shirt (the one that looked like a bunch of tattoos). Armando puts it on, thanks Punk and introduces his opponent this Sunda–OH FOR THE LOVE OF GOD NOT ELIJAH BURKE AGAIN.

Well if you were expecting a fun write-up, don’t bother clicking the ”more” bit.

Read moreECW On Sci-Fi #66 11/09/2007

ECW On Sci-Fi #64 28/08/2007

Let’s take a look at the relevant news from Powerslam Magazine before we watch this episode because WWE’s reputation was declining quicker than Rickety Cricket in Always Sunny:

Read moreECW On Sci-Fi #64 28/08/2007

ECW on Sci-Fi #62 14/08/2007

We’re live in Mohegan Sun Casino with Coachman continuing his search for WHO IS VINCE’S KID. Oh and he casually introduces the new ECW GM, Armando Estrada. Armando says his name a few times and introduces John Morrison and CM Punk for the contract signing for Summerslam. ”Sitting on the chair next to me with your little tattoos is the closest you’re going to get to earthly paradise.” Morrison asks Punk to think about signing, after all he couldn’t last fifteen minutes with him last week. Punk says he’s right because he beat him before the fifteen minutes. What a stupid set-up bit to remind the audience about last week. Punk says he doesn’t fluff his wear like Farrah Fawcett or wear jackets in August, but he will be wearing the ECW Title after Summerslam. Armando stops them from coming to blows and gives them matches tonight with the ECW monsters. There was a lot happening here with Coach and Armando but the important thing is this:

Read moreECW on Sci-Fi #62 14/08/2007

ECW on Sci-Fi #61 07/08/2007

We have enough plot for a dramatic video recap of last week! Punk won a Three Way Dance last week to get a shot at John Morrison tonight in a Fifteen Minutes Of Fame match. If he wins, he gets a shot at the title at Summerslam. Simples.

We’re in Youngstown, Ohio and THIS IS THE NEW SHIT is back in the intro, so we can have more Manson discussion. Despite enjoying his music, I’ve always been annoyed at him daring to put out Smells Like Children as a full-priced album (that I paid full-price money for) when it was three covers, three remixes and some shit. I don’t care if you recorded Portrait Of An American Family, I’m glad Dita Von Teese left you.

Read moreECW on Sci-Fi #61 07/08/2007

ECW on Sci-Fi #58 07/24/2007

Great American Bash 2007 was this Sunday and had a bit of a rocky build. So Kane vs. Edge was scheduled but Edge ended up injuring his left pectoral muscle after Kane attacked him during the Mardi Gras celebration on the July 10 Smackdown. Edge was forced to vacate his title on the Smackdown before the PPV and a Battle Royal was held to crowd the new champ which was won by The Great Khali (who held the title upside down). The injury to Edge had the unexpected positive of avoiding the fallout from the upcoming Pharmacy Probe steroid scandal he was named in.

Also the announced Khali vs. Batista match was changed to Kane vs. Khali vs. Batista after Kane and Batista went to a non-finish on the same episode of Smackdown after Khali blundered in on their Number One Contender match. The good news was no-one was injured in the process, the bad news was the match happened.

Read moreECW on Sci-Fi #58 07/24/2007

ECW on Sci-Fi #57 07/17/2007

We’re in Laredo, Texas and we still have the Manson intro that inspired so much discussion last week in the comments. Marcus Cor Von is still in the intro and Mechanical Animals was Manson at his best just for ”Yesterday I was a nihilist, today I’m just fucking bored.”

Backstage, a representative for Johnny Nitro declares this is the last time you’ll see Nitro on ECW. Tazz & Styles freak out because he’s the ECW Champ, he can’t leave. Unless you’re Lashley.

Read moreECW on Sci-Fi #57 07/17/2007

ECW on Sci-Fi #55 07/03/2007

We’re in Dallas, Texas and we have a new-ish intro with no Benoit clips and the old THIS IS EXTREEEEEEME song. Shame they’re still clinging to that side of ECW, looking forward to Don’t Question My Heart in a few months.

Tonight, CM Punk and Johnny Nitro engage in Pick Your Poison, which means they choose each other’s opponents and not actually poison, because Nitro could beat Punk by threatening him with a paracetamol.

Read moreECW on Sci-Fi #55 07/03/2007

ECW on Sci-Fi #51 06/05/2007

One Night Stand 2007 was last Sunday so in relevant news:

Rob Van Dam surprisingly beat Randy Orton in a stretcher match which would end up being RVD’s last match for WWE for several years. RVD sold a concussion as if he was drunk for most of the match so he could keep up with Orton’s pace. After dangerously flubbing a dive outside, RVD punched Orton a few times and rolled him across the finishing line.

Read moreECW on Sci-Fi #51 06/05/2007

ECW on Sci-Fi #50 05/29/2007

We’re in (not named), One Night Stand: A Night of Extreme Rules is this Sunday and here’s Raw’s Randy Orton! Dramatic MV covers Orton concussing HBK with The Punt at Judgement Day. RVD claimed Orton lacked respect so Orton punted him too. I always like when feuds segue-way into other feuds. RVD decided to plant himself head-first on the RKO too because he’s Rob Points At Self Van Points At Self Dam Spin-Kick Pose To Crowd.

Read moreECW on Sci-Fi #50 05/29/2007

ECW on Sci-Fi #48 05/15/2007

Another ECW on Sci-Fi, another dramatic recap of Lashley getting beat up by The McMahons and Umaga on Raw. This one turns into a Cannon Films production as Shane escapes by jumping on top of a limo as it drives away, only for Lashley to turn around and get struck down by Vince McNinja.

Read moreECW on Sci-Fi #48 05/15/2007

ECW on Sci-Fi #44 04/17/2007

ECW hails from Milan, Italy in front of a very loud crowd compared to previous weeks. Show starts with The New Breed in the ring and Elijah Burke (the only one who can talk) on the mic. Crowd boos and whistles the hell out of him so this is going to be a good show. Burke introduces the newest member of their group, CM Punk. Tazz thinks it was the best thing for ”this blue chipper”, Styles is pissed at a good guy like Punk joining a group that frequently cheat to win. Crowd is as conflicted as the commentators, with boos and CM Punk chants. Burke asks Punk why he joined:

Read moreECW on Sci-Fi #44 04/17/2007

ECW on Sci-Fi #41 03/20/2007

Dramatic recap of Bobby Lashley becoming the first person to break Chris Masters’ Masterlock, something that went unbroken for two years as Operation: Get Lashley The Fuck Over continues. Masters isn’t happy so he’s wrestling Lashley in a real match tonight, right here in Cleveland, Ohio.

Read moreECW on Sci-Fi #41 03/20/2007

ECW on Sci-Fi #38 02/27/2007

Recap of Vince picking Umaga for the Battle of The Billionaires and Trump choosing Lashley. It made sense from a storyline perspective as Vince was messing with ECW, even though Vince’s issue was with the old guys from the original company. So I guess what I’m trying to say is Trump should have chosen The Sandman.

Tonight it’s OH FOR FUCK’S SAKE Lashley vs. Holly again. Lashley’s beaten him three consecutive times but he gets another title shot. Oh and it’s in a Steel Cage because adding Ranch to stale bread makes it edible.

Read moreECW on Sci-Fi #38 02/27/2007

ECW on Sci-Fi #37 02/20/2007

Show sadly starts with a In Memory Of Mike Awesome. Awesome had a mullet and wasn’t a great talker but was able to live up to his surname every night by being The Heavyweight That Flew Like A Cruiserweight in FMW and ECW where not being the total package wasn’t an issue. Paul Heyman made sure Awesome wasn’t cutting soliloquies and made sure to was pair him with super-bumpers like Masato Tanaka and Spike Dudley so he looked like money (that ECW wasn’t paying him). The teased mega-feud between him, Rob Van Dam and Sabu in early 2000 sadly never happened after RVD got injured and ECW parted ways with Awesome and Sabu. Sadly neither WCW or WWF had Heyman’s ability to cover a wrestler’s weaknesses (something that still hurts WWE today) and Awesome took on humiliating gimmicks and became a Heat regular. Awesome was able to turn back the clock at One Night Stand 2005 and stole the show against preferred rival Tanaka in what would be his final match. To me and many others, it didn’t matter that Heyman presented him as an evil traitor or WCW decided he should be That Seventies Guy, he’ll always be remembered as Mike Fucking Awesome.

Read moreECW on Sci-Fi #37 02/20/2007

ECW on Sci-Fi #36 02/13/2007

edit: well I don’t know what’s happened here but the GIFs and images aren’t showing. Bare with me.

edit 2: I’m using Chrome like I always do and I can’t see anything, ditto on Firefox. Apparently some can see this on other browsers, I’m not doing anything different than normal so I’ve no idea.

We’re in Seattle, Wa. (waaaaah?) and Lashley starts the show to a booming reaction. It’s Extreme Rules and he’s wrestling…Holly? Not Snitsky then, the guy who attacked him last week? Aye well OK then.

Read moreECW on Sci-Fi #36 02/13/2007

ECW on Sci-Fi #35 02/06/2007

Sorry about no recap last week, went up to Glasgow for ICW’s biggest ever show and due to bad management I had no time to watch an episode of a C-show from nearly ten years ago. Er I mean ”in the spirit of the original ECW I decided to take the show off the air for a week due to the controversy of er…Sandman smoking indoors. Yeah that’ll work.”

Read moreECW on Sci-Fi #35 02/06/2007

ECW on Sci-Fi #31 01/09/2007

Last week, RVD got his fan-voted title shot against champ Lashley. The match went to a no-contest after RVD decided to kill himself and his opponent with a huge dive like Holmes and Moriarty. Because of that, it’s the re-match tonight under…er normal rules.

Read moreECW on Sci-Fi #31 01/09/2007