by Logan Scisco
–A video package
recaps Shane McMahon screwing Steve Austin over in the WWF title tournament
semi-finals last night at the Survivor Series.
–We get a new RAW
intro where it was always hard to know the exact lyrics, so I always make up my
own, even if they did not make any sense.
So my life in the box and soy la vie!!!
–Jim Ross and Jerry
“The King” Lawler are in the booth and they are live from Lexington,
Kentucky. I remember really wanting to
go to this show, but my dad refused to get tickets for it since he hated
wrestling. He would finally cave and get
tickets for Thunder the next year. At
least that show would feature Hulk Hogan, but it is still a downer to know that
I missed a post-pay-per-view RAW.
Shane McMahon, the Big Bossman, and the stooges come out to massive boos and
Vince rips the crowd for being hypocrites because they kiss up to their bosses on
a regular basis and should do it more.
He introduces the new WWF champion, the Rock, who gets a ton of heel
heat and the crowd chants “Rocky sucks” to his theme
music. The Rock justifies his heel turn
by saying that he did what he had to do to get ahead, unlike the trash in the
crowd that get by on minimum wage. He
also brings up the “Die Rocky die” and “Rocky sucks” chants from his initial
face run, saying he never forgot that and he rechristens the People’s Elbow as
the Corporate Elbow. Vince goes to
explain the conspiracy and he informs Steve Austin when he walks out that under his new contract he cannot touch Vince
unless provoked. Austin shows footage of
how Shane promised him a post-Survivor Series title shot two weeks ago on RAW. Vince says that that shot was changed to Survivor
Series, but Austin counters with legalize, saying that he has a contract
promising him a title match tonight and Judge Mills Lane confirms it. The crowd loses its mind over this news and
McMahon is incensed. They covered a lot
of bases here, but kept things moving in such a way as to keep you interested
throughout this lengthy segment. 1 for 1
Contest: The New Age Outlaws & X-Pac
defeat The Oddities (w/Luna Vachon & The Insane Clown Posse) when Billy
Gunn pins Kurrgan at 2:52:
Remember the Insane Clown Posse’s heel turn on the
Oddities a few weeks ago? Well, things
appear to be patched up before the match, but tensions continue as Shaggy 2
Dope accidentally delivers a flying elbow smash to Kurrgan instead of Billy
Gunn to cost the Oddities the match.
–After the match,
the Headbangers do a hit and run attack on the Road Dogg.
–An angry Mankind
arrives at the arena, screaming that he is coming home.
to get your DX football jersey for $39.99 (plus $9 shipping &
handling). The sports jersey items were
some of the best the WWF was selling during this period.
–Vince directs the
Big Bossman to stay close to him and asks the stooges to go take care of
Mankind. None of them want to do it, so
Vince assigns Pat Patterson the job since he knows Mankind the best. He reminds him that Mankind is gullible.
Champion Ken Shamrock walks out and says that he was screwed at Survivor Series. He issues a challenge to the Bossman and says
he will put his Intercontinental title on the line. These shorter promos that cut straight the
point were the way to go with Shamrock.
–Val Venis beats
Mark Henry (w/D-Lo Brown) with a schoolboy at 2:37:
Ross and Lawler use this match to take jabs at Paula
Jones and her nose job. Chyna makes her
return on the ramp after some back and forth action, distracting Henry, who
loses in the WWF trademarked distraction rollup finish that had not yet become
a running joke at this point.
–After the match,
Henry says he just wants to have a nice dinner with Chyna “with no sex
involved.” He reads a poem to her, but
Chyna just walks to the back.
–Steve Austin gets
some coffee, with a Pepsi cup placed as a convenient product placement. Does this mean CM Punk will even the odds
tonight? TUNE INTO….you get the idea (©
Scott Keith 1998. All rights reserved.).
Vince that he could not find Mankind in the arena and Vince hilariously
responds “you could not find your ass.”
Gerald Brisco volunteers to find Mankind.
– Steve Blackman
& Goldust defeat “Double J” Jeff Jarrett & The Blue Blazer (w/Debra
McMichael) when Blackman pins the Blazer after a pump kick at 2:09:
This match is the result of an angle on last week’s show
where both men were attacked by the Blue Blazer. Ross calls the Blazer outfit something out of
“1960s lucha libre.” This is an
accelerated tag match, where the Blazer jobs in short order to a pump kick, but
you see, it is not Owen Hart under the mask, as Owen runs in for a beatdown on
Blackman after the bout.
–Brisco says there
are some weird noises in the boiler room and he was too scared to go in. Commissioner Slaughter calls him a wuss and
Vince freaks. Slaughter is sent after
Mankind. After the break, Slaughter
comes back and says that Patterson and Brisco are needed to reason with
him. Vince recommends getting some riot
gear to take care of the Mankind problem and that he expects the problem to be
solved in short order. Now THIS is good
(w/Hos) beats Stephen Regal via forfeit when Regal takes the hos:
Is the Godfather worthy of the Hall of Fame? I have to think so as he
successfully pulled off two popular gimmicks with Papa Shango and being a
pimp. Regal’s facial expressions as the
hos flaunt their stuff are great. He
eventually settles for the hos and the Godfather wins via forfeit. However, as Regal is leaving, the Godfather
lets him know that “England is just for the fags,” (chalk that up to something
that will be censored on the WWE Network) which leads to a pull apart brawl
between the two.
destroys parts of the production crew.
Unfortunately, Kevin Dunn is not among the casualties.
–Steve Austin being
screwed by Shane McMahon in his match against Mankind at Survivor Series is the
Glover Rewind segment.
Championship Match: Ken Shamrock
(Champion) wrestles The Big Bossman to a double disqualification at 3:55
Average brawl between these two, which culminates in the
referee getting decked by both of them.
Eventually WWF officials intervene to stop the fight, but the pull apart
brawl does not come across as well. Rating:
*½ (1 for 2)
separate Shamrock and the Bossman, Vince and Shane McMahon walk out. Vince tells Shamrock that he can use a man
with his set of skills and that they are a lot alike because they came from
broken homes. He promises Shamrock a
family if he aligns with him and Shamrock shakes Vince, Shane, and the Bossman’s
hands. Vince’s manipulation of the roster continues.
–Some fans seek
Kane’s autograph outside of the arena and he chokes one of them against the
wall. A police siren can be heard in the
distance. He walks off into the mean
streets of Lexington.
Gangrel (w/Christian) defeat LOD 2000 via count out at 2:12:
This is the Droz and Animal combination of LOD 2000. Hawk walks out less than two minutes into the
match and begins walking up the Titantron.
Droz and Animal go to investigate and get counted out.
commercial break, Animal tries to talk Hawk, who is threatening to go out in a
blaze of glory, off the Titantron. Paul
Ellering says he cares about Hawk’s life and Droz climbs the Titantron. He seems to shove Hawk off and we go to
commercial. I get what they were going
for here, but this was really tasteless and segments like this are a turn off
to viewers who may have struggled with suicide.
1 for 3
–And the fans
quickly forget about that awful segment because Sable, the new WWF Women’s
champion is here for an interview with Michael Cole! Shane McMahon quickly interrupts her
interview to say that she is a creation of his father, which Sable refutes. Shane says that real women like Sable work real
hard for their place, but Sable says that she is not for sale. Like other Sable segments, this has a
punchline and not much else. 1 for 4
–The Rock’s attack
on Mankind at the end of Survivor Series is the MediEvil Slam of the Week.
–The stooges, wearing
UK Football helmets and pads head into the boiler room of Rupp Arena for
Mankind. Patterson screams “Mankind we
love you,” which cracks me up.
Unsurprisingly, Mankind attacks them, much of which we cannot see
because it is so dark. 2 for 5
–Before the main
event, Vince McMahon, Shane McMahon, the Big Bossman, and Ken Shamrock walk
out. Vince says he is not happy about
the upcoming WWF title match and ridicules the Southern hospitality he is
receiving due to the “asshole” chants.
He says that this is Austin’s last title shot.
Match: “Stone Cold” Steve Austin defeats
The Rock (Champion w/Vince McMahon, Shane McMahon, The Big Bossman & Ken
Shamrock) by disqualification when the Undertaker interferes at 7:59:
This was a great piece of booking because Austin regained
the WWF title after he lost it to Kane at the King of the Ring, so it was not
beyond the realm of possibility that he would regain the title immediately from
the Rock. Despite not getting much
action throughout the show, the crowd is engaged in this match from bell to
bell, as both men fight into the crowd and all around ringside. The match is a really abbreviated version of
what Austin and the Rock will do later and is used more as a vehicle to advance
other feuds as Mankind runs out six minutes in to try to get at Vince, but ends
up brawling with the Bossman instead, and the Undertaker does a run-in after
Austin hits a Stunner to cost him the title.
This bout is a prime example of how a crowd can take an average match
and make it seem like something special.
Rating: **½ (3 for 6)
The Final Report Card: I could have done without the Hawk nonsense,
but this show was really all about the Austin-Rock title match and it was a
ratings coup in that regard, drawing the second-highest rating in the U.S. for
a RAW up to this point and pulling in a big rating on TSN in Canada. You could hear some of the moans in the crowd
at the prospect of more Undertaker-Austin, but at least we have a pissed off
Mankind to rally behind for a few months before WrestleMania.
Monday Night War Rating: 5.5 (vs. 4.3 for Nitro)
Show Evaluation: Thumbs Up