Mr. Perfect vs. Papa Shango (and other Dream Matches!)

WWE/Indy News: Indie wrestler reveals how Papa Shango plans his voodoo spots

Possibly the greatest variance in quality between a wrestler’s visual appearance/gimmick and their in-ring ability.

Welcome back to more Dream Matches! I have some extremely rare stuff for you tonight, as the dreaded “1993 WWF” rears its ugly head once more, giving us a pair of beauties- Mr. Perfect vs. Papa Shango and The 1-2-3 Kid vs. Bastian Booger! Talk about main events in any arena in the country!

Then it’s a look at a crazy WCW rookie team I’d somehow managed to miss entirely- our own Oprah Noodlemantra turned me on to The Pit Crew- Dale “Demon” Torborg & Chad Fortune as guys decked out as WCW racing team pit crew guys. Naturally, their opposition is the Dream Matches favorite squad of Mean Mike & Tough Tom- Disorderly Conduct!

Then it’s the most “1996 WWF” match I could find, as it’s Jim Cornette dream match Barry Windham vs. Tony Anthony… except it’s the worst incarnations of both men- The Stalker vs. T.L. Hopper, in The Stalker’s debut! Then it’s more WCW jobberhood, as Al Green gets set up against Lash LeRoux! And finally, one of those great WCW weirdo mismatch bouts that inspired this column in the first place, as High Voltage face WCW’s lowest-tier luchadores- Ciclope & Galaxy!

(WWF Mania, March 5th, 1993)
* One more from the semi-short run of Papa Shango, where he faces a rising Mr. Perfect. Shango had by this point been jobbing all over the house show scene to guys like Undertaker & Bob Backlund, but was beating El Matador & Typhoon around the horn as well.

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Koko B. Ware vs. Bastian Booger (and other Dream Matches!)

BASTION BOOGER | Wiki | Wrestling Amino

That’s right- you know it’s a good day when BASTIAN BOOGER is featured in the article!

Welcome back to more Dream Matches! This time I have another doozy from WWF Mania, as their featured match is Bastian Booger vs. KOKO B. WARE, at this point a member of High Energy in the world’s most ridiculous pants. Then it’s the No-Limit Soldiers/West Texas Rednecks feud continuing in WCW, as Redneck leader Curt Hennig takes on the Power Plant jobber Chase Tatum, now a white-boy rap fan. Then it’s 3-Count vs. Disorderly Conduct, as the DC boys continue jobbing to every team coming down the pipeline!

And try to control your excitement as “Squire” Dave Taylor faces wunderkind rookie Prince Iaukea on a Spring Break Nitro while the cameras ignore them in favor of nWo stuff! Then back to the WWF as The Blue Blazer (Owen Hart as a JTTS) takes on The Warlord of the Powers of Pain- mini-star vs. tag guy! It’s actually up in the air who might win! And finally, a double-whammy dream match as HUGH MORRUS faces RICK FULLER on two separate occasions!

(WWF Mania, April 16th 1994)
* Man, what fresh hell is THIS? Booger vs. a tag wrestler? Apparently this is Booger’s last televised match in the company, too- he even gets the “already in the ring” deal.

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Yokozuna & Bastian Booger vs. Men On A Mission (and other Dream Matches)

Richard Land on Twitter: "An absolute TRAVESTY we never got a Yokozuna vs Bastion Booger feud!… "

It’s a shock and a tragedy that I can’t find any solo matches between these two.

And we’re back with more of wrestling’s wildest Dream Matches! Can you withstand the power of Yoko & Booger working the world’s softest match with Mo & Mabel? More Booger, as he wrestles Rick Martel in a battle of opposites! Also watch the Dungeon of Doom’s B-Team crush High Voltage, Joe Gomez & The Renegade! Speaking of “Plain Old Rick”, watch his last match as he fights Wrath during his “Goldberg” Run! And did you know that Terry Taylor had the world’s most forgettable run in the WWF during 1992-93? True story! He takes on Jim Powers!

As always, these are all readily available on YouTube.

YOKOZUNA & BASTIAN BOOGER (w/ Mr. Fuji) vs. MEN ON A MISSION (Mabel & Mo, w/ Oscar):
* An Oakland, California house show gets this AMAZING Dream Match, featuring four huge fat guys (when Mo is the Cruiserweight, you know a match will be good). Yoko was actually WWF Champion at this time, apparently. He tosses his salt right on a ring attendant and shoves the announcer after announcing the faces, then he & Mabel won’t get out of each other’s faces, practically squashing Hebner between them- dude has gotta be ribbing these guys. The terrible video and sound transfer has robbed us of Oscar’s famous diction, sadly.

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Earthquake’s Dream Matches (Boss Man! Paul Roma! Booger!)

mengs-mullet: “Earthquake's tryout match Earthquake Evans w/ Slick vs Paul  Roma September 20th, 1989 ” | Mens tops, Men casual, Paul roma

Tenta as Yukon lumberjack “Earthquake Evans” in a 1989 tryout match, with Slick as his manager!

I’ve long felt that John “Earthquake” Tenta is a tragically underrated “Big Man” worker, but, much like Haku, he’s had a bit of a renaissance as former Workrate Snobs like me have learned to appreciate what a hard-working big guy can bring to the table. I was gonna make a more varied list for a column, but I had enough for a full one of JUST Tenta, so here’s a random selection of fun or weird Earthquake matches! Watch him take on such luminaries as Paul Roma (back when he was trying out in a Lumberjack gimmick!), The Big Boss Man (with one hell of a power feat), Tugboat & Bastian Booger!

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