QOTD 118: Eff you, Smark Ass.

Today’s question comes from ToddLorenz.

He wants to know Why Does Triple H Hate Smarks? 

Well, Todd, I think it’s for the same reason Dante and Randall of “Clerks” fame hate their jobs. “This job would be great if it wasn’t for the fuckin’ customers”.

 I’ll get into this more after the jump, but my thoughts on the subject are, if I was Triple H, I wouldn’t like me either.

But for now, secondary questions:

If you were Triple H or Kevin Nash, would you hate smarks? Is there a ‘good’ kind of smark and a ‘bad’ kind of smark? 

How often do you think smarks get ‘worked’ by various ‘leaks’ and shoot interviews and such, where pro-wrestlers know the key to a big payday is often times some level of real animosity or some controversy that happened ‘IRL’ that should be settled in the ring? 

See also: Hardy, Matt, Edge,Edgerton, and McBigBoobs, Lita

I think Triple H hates smarks for the same reason I’m not very fond of my first kiss. In 4th grade there was a girl – Rachel. For whatever reason – most likely because we were both fat, the upperclassmen (8th and 9th grade cheer leaders leaders) thought we’d make a cute couple and encourage Rachel and I to kiss at a dance the cheerleaders were putting on.

Which is fine – except that when a lot of people are encouraging you to do something, to the point of annoyance – that any joy or validation of confidence you’d get from that experience is either tainted or dwindled – especially if you intended to do it anyway on your own.

It’s like getting ready to take out the trash and having your mom tell you to do it right before you would have gotten brownie points for being proactive.

Thus if I had to guess I think Mr. H’s problem with Smarks is three fold.

1) He thinks they know better than him. In theory I’d argue this is true. In much the same way sports fan can happily sit back and scream at their TV, call into radio, or blow up twitter, when a coach makes a bone-head call or refuses to feed the ball to a given player, the fact is unless you’re ‘in the shit’ your opinion *is* shit.

Worse, when he does do something we ‘approve of’ instead of giving the man credit, we say ITS ABOUT TIME or LET’S SEE HOW THEY SCREW IT UP.

2) He’s a heel. It’s one thing to get booed at a show, but I mean, when seemingly every HARDCORE pro wrestling fan hates your guts or generally dislikes you, I have to imagine in some, backasswards way, he enjoys it.

Similar to how I love using Blog Otters because everyone hates it, I imagine Triple H happily shits on the Smarks because he gets a rise out of it, and knows they’ll keep showing up and watching Raw and bumping live threads.

3) He has a chip on his shoulder. For better or worse, Triple H remains and I imagine he feels wildly disrespected. Rock left. Stone Cold left. Lesnar left. Lashley left. Benoit died. Eddie died. And I imagine it pisses him off that we don’t respect the guy.

Triple H save for an injury or two was WWE’s Anchor for seemingly ever. He didn’t do drugs. He didn’t drink. He never beat his wife or left to make a movie, then left for good to make more movies. Here is a guy who eats, sleeps, and BREATHES pro-wreslting, and we all hate him.

So he hates us back.


I was looking for some kind of insightful quote from Triple H, and this is the first thing that popped up, which is ASSUREDLY NOT from him, but cool anyway:

The best thing for being sad, replied Merlyn, beginning to puff and blow, is to learn something. That is the only thing that never fails. You may grow old and trembling in your anatomies, you may lie awake at night listening to the disorder of your veins, you may miss your only love, you may see the world about you devastated by evil lunatics, or know your honour trampled in the sewers of baser minds. There is only one thing for it then to learn. Learn why the world wags and what wags it. That is the only thing which the mind can never exhaust, never alienate, never be tortured by, never fear or distrust, and never dream of regretting.