Dynamite tonight. Fourth labor of Jericho (Wardlow with MJF as special guest referee) and The Good Brothers defend the Impact Tag Team gold against the Dark Order. Rampage premieres Friday.
No more jokes, I’m not funny. I don’t want to write it, and according to the threads you don’t want to read it. I’ve got problems, apparantly. I thought this would be a fun gig but it isn’t. Anybody who wants to take over my three nights a week (and thinks they can do a better job), let Scott know. PMH is also gone from the comments as of tonight.
Thanks to anyone who actually reads this, critical or not.
AEW Dynamite is coming home to Jacksonville. Cody and Black have their long awaited match, The Juice is back (not that one, the luchador) and The Painmaker has to hit a top rope move to pass the Third Labor of Jericho.
“He may get over, until they do something stupid with him.”- Jim Cornette on Malachi Black
Welcome to wrestling in 2021. There are no stars, just guys. People can make an unheard of amount of money and not even wrestle on television, or be an undefeated champion of their brand and then job like a bitch to Jeff Harvey. They can release the biggest merchandise seller so far this decade and say he costs too much (!), because they already gave his gimmick to a voodoo doll. The companies sell tickets, not the names…. until they drag out Goldberg or Sting or Cena for neverending farewell tours nobody asked for (just wait til AEW gets Flair, I dread it). One company is so designed for children it’s a laughing stock, and the other loses advertisers over bloody pizza cutters and has a VICE PRESIDENT WITH A NECK TATTOO.
So why bother? Why follow a performance art (not a sport, despite the athleticism) that you are afraid to tell some people at work you watch? Why care when these companies make dumb decision after dumb decision? Why pay for merch and Peacock and pay per views?
I think it’s because deep down inside, we’re still that kid on the living room rug, mesmerized by Hogan vs. Andre. Still the high school dork who jumped up and down when somebody, ANYBODY beat the nWo. Still the college kid with the fifth row house show tickets we cancelled that date over (and she could get it. Remember her? Damn.)
When wrestling is good, there’s nothing better in this world. When it’s bad, it’s probably Impact.
Don’t forget NXT is on SyFy this week and has Johnny Gargano vs. Dexter Lumis as YOUR main event. Plus AEW Dark and more Olympics (which unfortunately won’t rep my favorite team, the Really Rottens. Dastardly and Muttly ftw.)
Hey, backyard wrestlers! Tired of maiming and disfiguring yourselves with everyday household objects to disguise your lack of workrate and charisma? Do you think wrestling peaked with ECW back in the bygone days of the 20th century? Have you robbed a bank?
Well, for a limited time only, you are eligible to main event AEW Dynamite! Sponsored by Domino’s….? No longer sponsored by Domino’s. Oops. (You can’t tell me that was a coincidence. It was somebody’s idea of a joke gone wrong. If you make jokes, they go wrong sometimes… own it and be a man.) That style of wrestling has no place on a national stage anyway. You can have a product that appeals to adults without being trashy. Oh well, the BOD rolls on….
Tonight, it’s the Impact Homecoming dance! Because WWE Mixed Match Challenge did so well.
DO YOU HEAR THE THUNDER? It ain’t a storm, pal, it’s DYNAMITE! That’s right, the best night to be a wrestling fan this week… Fight For The Fallen!
Tonight, the Dark Order takes on The Elite in a ten man elimination tag! Chris Jericho goes hardcore! Christian, Jungle Boy and Luchasaurus go wild on the Hardy Family Office! FTR vs. Santana and Ortiz, with Tully and Konaan on the outside probably having their own match! Plus a bout for the IWGP US title! All an hour from my house, but I was too cheap to buy tickets! Exclamation points!
This is honestly, 100 percent unsolicited by Scott, but have you considered joining The Patreon Of Doom? For the price of a McDonalds Crappy Meal, you can help out a great site so we can continue to bitch about wrasslin’ together all week. Like adults!
Well, in the same way Nikki A.S.S. is Almost A Superhero (and almost a world champion, except she won it by cheating and now has to job to CHHHarlotte in non title matches while Rhea Ripley stands around trying to act and MONDAY NIGHT RAW ROLLS ON LOL!!!!1)…. this is almost a night thread, starting…. now.
Oh yeah, NXT has Bronson Reed vs. Adam Cole and more Breakout Tournament. AEW Dark has only five matches, with the usual suspects. Sports and stuff. I guess I would be a crappy reporter. I just want to make you laugh; go with what you know, I say.
Then welcome to the Blog Of Doom. I’m PMH, one letter stands for Paul, the others don’t. CM Punk may be headed to AEW, and tonight, Dynamite has night 2 of the Fyter Fest! Britt Baker and The Mox will defend their titles, and Chris Jericho will get hit with a chair numerous times! (Don’t tell Mick Foley)
I think I accidentally stole my “get to it” line from Tommy Hall. Doomers, I need a new go-home line… winner gets an authentic near mint Marvel No Prize.
Big weekend for wrestling fans everywhere! WWE Universe rejoice; no more creepy ass Thunderdome, unless too many people boo Roman and the noise machine breaks. There is a downside, though; Lesnar and Cena are on their way back, and if they can still go, ok, prove it. But, Goldberg in 2021? I was a big fan of his in the ’90s, but dude is over 50, sloppy and dangerous. Build new stars, we’ve been telling WWE for decades, but they don’t care. I just don’t get this reliance on part timers, but I can’t change it either, so meh. AEW’S BETTER ANYWAY! Fight me!
On that note, to all the trolls: Scott Keith’s gonna Scott Keith. He has been a published author since before some of you were born, and his style remains the same (mostly). It’s his blog, so if you don’t like it, move along. People come here to chat and hang out, not be insulted or bullied. Be a star, shitheads.
Hello there Doomers. This is PMH, coming to you live from Horsemen Country (western NC)… custodial technician, proud foster dad and SK reader since Netcop and The Smarks. Taking over three nights a week, nice and early for all your ranting needs.
Black Widow was awesome, basically a Cap movie without Cap. Cool to see some form of Taskmaster in the MCU, and great performance by Florence Pugh, Paige from that Paige Movie (as a married man, this is all I can say about her safely. Single guys, feel free to comment away).