The SmarK Rant for AEW Dark Elevation – 02.21.22

The SmarK Rant for AEW Dark Elevation – 02.21.22

Taped from Nashville, TN

Your hosts are Excalibur, Mark Henry & Paul Wight

Tay Conti, Anna Jay & Red Velvet v. Freya States, Arie Alexander & Angelica Risk

Tay hits Freya with chops and pops up to the top for a sunset flip, but States blocks it, so the faces take her to the corner and work her over.  Velvet with the Nash choke and a standing moonsault for two, but Freya manages to bring Red to the enhancement corner for a weird reverse headbutt from Alexander.  Risk comes in and misses a charge, so Anna comes in with a rolling kick on Risk for two and then finishes with the sleeper at 3:40.  Mark Henry:  “it looked like their opponents were not a good team.”  No kidding.  That’s an understatement, this was sloppy as hell.  0 for 1.

2point0, Daniel Garcia & The Gunn Club v. Dean Alexander, Dominic Garrini, Chico Adams, Ariel Levy & Kevin Ku

Matt Lee immediately throws a release german on Dollar Tree CM Punk, who is apparently Kevin Ku, and it’s over to Garrini.  Austin comes in and helps set him up for Colten to hit a neckbreaker, but then the heels all argue about who gets to tag in.  Luckily they bond and all team up to pancake Levy, before bringing Garcia in to clean house with some pretty vicious suplexes.  Sharpshooter finishes the guy in the plaid trunks at 2:56.  Garcia was pretty intense here.  1 for 2.

The Bunny v. Kaitland Alexis

Alexis does some mocking hops around the ring, so Bunny chokes her out with her jacket and puts the boots to her in the corner.  Bunny with a kneelift and finishes with Down the Rabbit Hole at 2:04.  Nothing to this one.  1 for 3.

Andrade, the Butcher, the Blade and Private Party v. Shawn Dean, Carlie Bravo, Baron Black, Jameson Ryan & Chandler Hopkins

Lots of 10 man tags this week for some reason.  Also Shawn Dean gets an actual entrance and everything for some reason.  Him and Carlie Bravo seem to be positioned as a real team so I bet they’ll get some shine here.  Butcher continues to look lean and badass in his return.  Wight thinks that the AHFO should change their name to the Andrade Hardy Mercenary Office so that they can have a catchphrase of “AH!  Mo!”  And then Mark Henry comments on the excessive amount of people with blond tips in the match.  Quen gets a slingshot senton on Ryan, but Hopkins comes in to try a double-team and accidentally hits his partner with a leg lariat.  Butcher beats on Hopkins, but Captain Shawn Dean gets a hot tag and cleans house on Private Party, hitting a floatover DDT on Quen to set up a double-team flatliner with Bravo for two.  Quen fights him off and brings in Andrade, who hits Bravo with the double knees and hammerlock DDT.  And then he kindly tags in Kassidy, who takes the pin at 4:40.  Well that was nice of El Idolo!  And then everyone celebrates with Kassidy while Matt Hardy comes out to watch.  2 for 4.

Ruby Soho v. Haley J

Ruby takes her down with a wristlock and beats on her with shoulderblocks in the corner, then hits her with running boots, but Haley blocks a suplex with a thumb to the eye.  Clothesline gets one for Haley.  Ruby hits her with more kicks and the Riot Kick finishes at 2:02.  Haley’s selling was a little wacky but this was a fine squash.  3 for 5.

Lance Archer v. Joey O’Riley

As usual, Archer hauls his own opponent into the ring, prompting Justin Roberts to quip “throwing his opponent down the ramp” for the intro.  Chokeslam and Blackout prompts a ref stoppage at 0:24.  Well at least it wasn’t a DQ for kicking too much ass.  I always laugh at him destroying jobbers.  4 for 6.

Nyla Rose, Emi Sakura & Leyla Hirsch v. Keira Hogan, AQA & Skye Blue

Emi Sakura is like the queen of Elevation lately.  AQA quickly gets triple-teamed by the heels and Hirsch gets a corner dropkick for two, but AQA dropkicks her for two.  Over to Hogan, who had a pretty interesting video piece about her song on the AEW CD before this match, and she gets a low dropkick for two.  Skye Blue comes in and hits another dropkick for two, so Leyla brings Sakura in and Blue rolls her up for two as well.  Sakura does her Queen routine to setup the running splash in the corner, but Blue manages to get AQA back in.  And Nyla immediately destroys her before missing a charge.  AQA goes up for her shooting star, but Vickie trips her up and Nyla slams her off the top.  So Blue comes back in again and blocks a rollup from Hirsch, which gets two.  And then Nyla just chokeslams Blue, and Leyla hits AQA with a nasty german and pins Blue with a running knee at 4:50.  A fun, fast-paced match here and they’re really protecting AQA.  5 for 7.

Jay Lethal, Frankie Kazarian, Brock Anderson, Lee Johnson & Matt Sydal v. Peter Avalon, Cesar Bononi, JD Drake, Luther & Serpentico

Nice to see that Arn can devote his full attention to his real son now.  I will say, Peter Avalon’s new hairdo is SPECTACULAR.  You cannot take that away from him.  It’s so great he has to strut, and you can’t even blame him.  So Avalon and Lethal trade struts and Lethal takes him down with a hiptoss into a dropkick.  Over to Drake, who is apparently the “heater” for the team, and Brock immediately works his arm.  Over to Serpentico and Sydal hits him with kicks and takes down both Chaos Project at once in a move so baffling that Mark Henry has no idea what to say about it.  Luther cuts him off and the heels beat on Sydal in the corner, including Luther smashing his own partner’s head into Sydal repeatedly in a funny spot.  Poor Serpentico.  Avalon comes in with a fistdrop for two and I just cannot take my eyes off his hair, as he looks like an 80s action hero according to the announcers.  Over to, you guessed it, Frankie Kazarian, and he runs wild and dropkicks Serpentico into Drake.  Ryan Nemeth gets involved (after “getting fired from the set of Tron where he was working as an extra” according to Wight) and Arn takes him out, and IT’S BREAKING LOOSE IN TULSA.  Serpentico rolls up Kazarian for two (“No!  NOT LIKE THIS!” notes Henry) and then all the babyfaces dive onto him with their flying finishes and Lethal pins him with the big elbow at 6:02.  6 for 8 thanks to Avalon’s hair.  That’s MAIN ROSTER hair now.  Hopefully it at least got him a contract extension.

Another fun show that flies by and gets people over.  What a concept.