The PG Era Rant for AEW Elevation Episode 35 (“I Know That Guy!”), November 1, 2021.
From Boston, MA.
Your hosts are Tony, Mark, Paul, George, and Ringo.
TONIGHT! Emi Sakura and Nyla Rose team up again, this time against Kris Statlander and Ryo Mizunami! Meanwhile, the other Best Friends are in six-man tag action facing The Acclaimed with Serpentico!
PLUS – Tay Conti, Frankie Kazarian, FTR, and Riho!
Opening match: Nyla Rose (#5 women, 21-5) and Emi Sakura (8-2) (w/Vickie Guerrero and Lulu Pencil, respectively) vs. Ryo Mizunami (11-3) and Kris Statlander (#3 women, 23-3). Paul Wight thanks Alex Marvez for providing him with his crib notes. Both Statlander and Nyla got byes in the TBS tournament, with Nyla facing Hikaru Shida in the quarterfinals.
Mizunami and Sakura start with pleasantries, by which I mean chopping each other very hard, and Sakura takes over with a hairpull slam. Romero Special by Sakura, but Mizunami back drops out of the double underhook. Kobashi machine gun chops by Mizunami, with exclamation point, and Statlander enters as Mizunami PULLS THE ROPE to get Statlander into Sakura in the corner. Snapmare and dropkick follow, for two. Sakura takes over with an inverted Cross Rhodes, and Nyla enters, but Statlander takes out the legs and adds a half-senton for two. Mizunami wants in, but Nyla clears the corner and lets Statlander bounce off her on a crossbody attempt.
Sakura back in, and she gets the corner crossbody before telling Lulu to get out of the camera view. Nyla back in, and she boxes Statlander and puts her up top. Statlander knocks Nyla away and comes off, and this time the crossbody connects. Hot tag Mizunami, and she spears Nyla and goes for the uranage. Nyla elbows out, but runs into it on second try for two, Sakura saves. Statlander runs into Mizunami and gets DDT’d as Nyla gives Mizunami a neckbreaker. Senton bomb gets Nyla the win at 4:11. This match should’ve gotten more time in my opinion. *3/4
Jon Moxley book ad.
Frankie Kazarian (30-6) vs. Victor Benjamin (debut). YES! Not for Kazarian, but he’s cool. It’s for Benjamin, who is someone I have worked with in Nova Pro and CRAB, and I can safely say he’s one of the coolest dudes I’ve been around in the locker room. He and his wife Lady Frost deserve to be big names in this business, and let’s hope his run in Beyond and appearance here leads to something.
Kazarian and Benjamin switch off on arms to start, with Kazarian getting hiptosses after escaping. Benjamin backs him into the corner and fakes a clean break, but Kazarian ducks a wild right and chops away. Russian legsweep off the ropes, but Benjamin with an uppercut to take over. Deadlift German suplex and Benjamin does the HHH formal bow. Flying knee across the ring for Benjamin, but Kazarian lands on his feet on an alley-oop and begins the comeback into a cross-chop and spinning heel kick. Kazarian goes up top, and a missile dropkick connects. Charge eats an elbow, though, and Benjamin with a Hammer Throw. HE misses a blind charge, though, and Kazarian with a lariat. CFCW ends it at 2:19. Well, I’m glad he got the appearance even if it was short. 1/2*
Full Gear ad.
Riho (6-2) vs. Kayla Sparks (0-1). Riho is such a perfect smiling babyface, and that entrance music just fits her. Henry: “I don’t know if I’ve ever seen a smile more infectious.”
Riho with the headlock, and she cartwheels over on a drop-down by Sparks. They fight for armdrags, with Riho getting it after a Rocker Dropper flip, but she walks into a kneelift. Blind charge misses and Riho with a guillotine on the top rope. Diving crossbody follows, for two. Northern Lights try, but Sparks elbows out only to get tripped into the middle rope. Riho with the Area Code Kick and she goes up, and the double-stomp connects. Now the Northern Lights hits for the win at 1:46. Mark your calendar: Riho wins a squash.
AEW Elite GM App ad.
Non-title: AAA Tag Team Champions FTR (Dax Harwood and Cash Wheeler) (w/Tully Blanchard) (next challengers, 25-3) vs. Waves and Curls (Jaylen Brandyn and Traevon Jordan) (0-2). If you’ve been watching Uncharted Territory, you’re familiar with Brandyn and Jordan. This isn’t their first appearance on Dark, either, in case you still think they sound familiar. It’s official: FTR and the Lucha Bros will happen at Full Gear – but, oddly, it was the champs who issued the challenge.
Brandyn and Harwood start. Harwood gets the arm, but when Brandyn flips out of it, Harwood clotheslines him down and brings in Wheeler. Wheeler with an axhandle off the ropes, then a big chop. Harwood in, and they get the WWE2K drop toehold and elbowdrop combo. Harwood with an uppercut and he mocks Jordan, but Brandyn with an enzuigiri to Harwood and a rana to Wheeler. Big hot tag to Jordan (yes, already), but FTR are still playing dead so there’s no house of fire segment. So Jordan covers Harwood, who wakes after Not Even One and lifts him for the Big Rig for the pin at 2:06. Henry: “I’m not even mad.” 1/2*
Tay Conti (next challenger) vs. Little Mean Kathleen (debut). Kathleen is going by LMK here, but because I instinctively type MLK a lot I’ll call her Kathleen. Conti doesn’t get a chyron because we’re too busy shilling the Dallas show on 12/15.
Kathleen goes behind and smacks Conti with forearms before flexing, but Conti is unimpressed and takes over with the swinging gutbuster. Three pump kicks in the corner set up the DDTay to win at 49.0 seconds. Conti says Baker is “DMDone” when they meet.
The Acclaimed (Max Castor and Anthony Bowens) (#5 team, 25-6) and Serpentico (12-51) vs. Best Friends (Wheeler YUTA, Chuck Taylor, and Orange Cassidy (#2 men)) (6-1). Gotta say, Wheeler Yuta’s fit in so well in this group I don’t even miss Trent. But I know someone who will: The Acclaimed. “The city is a damn disgrace / it’s why Tom Brady went to Tampa Bay.” “Yuta and Chuck are a double Jannetty!” “OC you gonna get your head rock / you’ll be eliminated like the Red Sox!” BUT WAIT, Orange Cassidy… has the mic?
“Yo. Yo. Okay, listen…”
And he begins giving Caster the SHIN KICKS OF DOOM before rolling under a clothesline and landing the dropkick.
“Word to your mother.”
Commentary loses it as we get a pier-six to start. Caster works over Yuta and brings in Bowens, and the Acclaimed get a double Russian legsweep into a soccer kick into a full senton, getting Bowens two. Bowens clubs down Yuta and brings in Caster, then after a Bowens suplex, Caster brings in Serpentico to slam him onto Yuta. It doesn’t work. Twice. Yuta with a shotgun dropkick on both of the Acclaimed, and Taylor runs in to run them over with all the lariats. Taylor then slams Serpentico onto each of the Acclaimed, but he succeeds.
Serpentico shoves Taylor away but runs into a knee, and Orange comes in as Taylor dives onto Caster. World’s Laziest Elbowdrop gets two, Bowens saves. Orange with a Flair Flip and he goes up, diving with a crossbody onto Bowens. Orange kicks Caster away, but Bowens catches him. The Acclaimed with Critical Acclaim, and Serpentico adds the low DDT for two, Taylor saves. They set up Acclaim to Fame on Taylor, but Yuta shoves Caster away and Taylor gets Soel Food. Serpentico with a SUPERKICK to Yuta and Taylor, but Orange with the Orange Punch to win at 3:14. That was basically a match at double-speed. *1/2 And we HUG IT OUT with Statlander as we’re out after 30 minutes like it’s some Queen’s Crown retrospective.
See you tomorrow!