The SmarK Rant for Mid-South Wrestling – 08.24.85

The SmarK Rant for Mid-South Wrestling – 08.24.85

Back to Bill Watts again for a bit.

Taped from Shreveport, LA

Your hosts are Jim Ross & Joel Watts

Meanwhile, we journey to the camp of the mysterious MIDNIGHT RIDER.  I don’t want to spoil his secret identity, but he damn sure voted Republican and may or may not have problems with black people.

Hacksaw Jim Duggan v. Mike Scott

Well, we can immediately eliminate Duggan from contention as the Rider, since he’s here in the ring at the same time as the vignette was aired.  Duggan takes Scott down with a hammerlock and then puts him down with a clothesline and finishes with a shoulderblock at 1:25. Scott was hairier than my Husky and probably sheds more.  0 for 1.

Mid-South TV title:  Hacksaw Butch Reed v. Jerry Gray

Before we can begin, Jake Roberts and Barbarian sprint into the ring and Jake lays out a challenge for Reed to face Barbarian because they might be friends, but money is what matters.  Reed wants to know why “the big dummy” can’t talk for himself, but he’ll put the title on the line any time Grizzly Smith wants him to.  So this leads to a shoving match as the referee desperately tries to avoid a wrestling match erupting here on this wrestling show and everyone gets separated.  You know who would be down with making the match immediately and HOOKING ‘EM UP?  Bill Watts!  Too bad he lost that loser-leaves-town match and now he’s gone for 90 days and unable to tell it like it is for us.  If only there was some other person who would be walking tall in his name, taking no guff from anyone.  Grey gets some offense with punches in the corner, but Reed goes up with a fist off the middle and adds the bulldog, then finishes with a press slam at 2:03.  1 for 2.

Jake Roberts & The Barbarian v. The Bruiser & Carl Stiles

The Bruiser is sadly not a masked Bruiser Brody or Dick the Bruiser, but rather just some guy.  Jake takes the Bruiser down with a snapmare and works on a chinlock.  Over to Barbarian, as JR refers to him as “The proverbial weasel slapper”.  EXCUSE ME?  I’d rather not hear about John Nord slapping his weasel here on this show that children watch.  Barbarian gets a couple of press slams on Bruiser, and Stiles comes in and gets laid out as well, and Jake DDTs Bruiser for good measure and it’s a double pin at 2:15.  1 for 3.

Meanwhile, we get another video of Jake and Barbarian, set to the dulcet non-copyrighted tones of whatever Ratt ripoff they’re using.

Steve Williams & Bob Sweetan v. Mark Ragin & Wendell Cooley

Cooley quickly takes Sweetan down with a pair of headlock takedowns and the heels bail.  Back in, Doc pounds on Cooley with forearms, but Wendell gets a bodypress for two.  Over to Ragin, who gets a dropkick for two, but he’s too far down the jobber totem pole and thus Doc cuts him off with a backdrop suplex immediately.  Over to Chester the Molester, who pounds away and gets a bearhug, and then Doc switches in and gets his own.  Ragin manages to make a hot tag to Cooley, but he puts his head down and gets cut off by Doc again.  Sweetan drops knees on Cooley and goes to an armbar, but Cooley fights back on Doc and backdrops him.  Sweetan cuts him off with an elbow for two and the heels stay on the arm, but Doc comes off the middle rope and hits Cooley’s knees.  Back to Ragin with a JOBBER HOT TAG and it’s BREAKING LOOSE IN TULSA, but Sweetan hits him in the throat behind the ref’s back, and the Oklahoma Stampede finishes at 5:50.  Pretty entertaining tag match here.  2 for 4.

Superstar Bill Dundee v. Dale Williams

Dundee, still smarting from getting pinned by a midget last week, takes Williams down and works the leg right away while the crowd’s female population shrieks about something, which turns out to be Bobby Fulton coming to ringside.  For a minute there I thought maybe Bill Watts was returning from his suspension!  But that’s not to be.  Dundee works the arm and gets a double arm suplex for two, but Bill gets all distracted by Fulton and Williams hits him from behind.  Hasn’t he ever watched RAW?  You should always do a schoolboy rollup in that situation.  It’s literally an unbeatable move when distraction is used.  And indeed Dundee just shakes him off, splashes him, and gets the pin at 2:30.  Afterwards, Bobby Fulton wants to know if the deal for beating Dundee and getting his jacket is still valid.  Bill reminds us that it is, so Fulton reminds him of the loss last week, and then Little Coco runs out in Dundee’s hot pink gear for a funny payoff.  And then Dutch Mantell hits the ring and lays out Fulton, with Tommy Rogers making the save to set up the next program for the Fantastics.  I like it, they paid off a couple of previous angles and set up a new storyline.  3 for 5.

Al Perez v. Brody Chase

Perez takes him down with a headlock and works the arm for a bit, but Chase makes the ropes.  Chase makes a comeback, but just as the announcers talk about how Perez needs to show some more grit, he just unloads on Chase with a pair of rights and then pins him at 1:34.  Point taken.  3 for 6.

Meanwhile, for those who missed it the first time, let’s return to the camp of the super-mysterious mystery man known only as the MIDNIGHT RIDER.  The audio is all weird so I’m assuming they were overdubbing Ennio Morricone here or something.

Dutch Mantell v. Tommy Rogers

Tommy goes around ringside personally hugging every woman at ringside.  Hopefully they sell replacement panties at the gimmick table.  Dutch attacks and works the arm, but Rogers takes him down with a flying headscissors, but then tries a second one and gets dropped on the top turnbuckle and Dutch gets two.  Dutch with the powerslam for two and he drops an elbow, then goes up to the middle rope with a double axehandle.  Snap suplex gets two.  Short clothesline and he drops a knee on Tommy’s back, but Rogers makes a comeback with a dropkick and then dodges Dutch’s dropkick.  Tommy continues making the comeback and dodges another dropkick from Dutch, and a sunset flip gets two.  Rollup gets two as Dundee pulls down the top rope and Rogers goes out over the top to draw the DQ at 4:51.  And of course it’s a PIER SIX BRAWL between the Fantastics and the heels to end the show.  4 for 7.

Pretty hot show, but now I’m gonna be in suspense all week wondering who the mysterious Midnight Rider could be!