The Ron Simmons era begins as Bill Watts tries to recreate the glory days of Mid-South almost a decade removed.
Intro: Tony and Jesse reveal that Larry Zbyszko, in the final bit of payback for fucking up for the Dangerous Alliance in the War Games match, recently got his arm broken by Arn and Bobby on Saturday Night. Jesse says he knows that’ll piss off Larry, because it means no golf for him that summer.
The Steiner Brothers vs. Mike Sampson and GQ Stratus
Stratus is a big, heavy guy, so Scott shows that means nothing to him and throws him about with ease. Jesse continues with his ribbing of Rick Steiner by questioning the mixed up boots. Rick comes in to inflict some brutal punishment. Sampson comes in as the headgear falls off. Scott finishes with the Frankensteiner. My word, I thought they were going to show they could do a move off the shoulders to Stratus just to show they could.
WCW Magazine (w/Eric Bischoff): Dustin Rhodes faced Dick Slater last week and almost got screwed over by Greg Valentine until Ole Anderson reversed things. The feud is not over yet… shame.
Van Hammer vs. Eric Davidson
One of the worst wrestlers of all time is back, either from rehab or filming Knights and Warriors, I forget which. Completely fucks up a bunch of moves and barely knows how to do the slingshot suplex for the win. At least his latex tights were good.
Tony and Jesse take us back to Saturday Night, where Doc and Gordy left the job of taking out the Steiners to Paul E Dangerously. We’ll get there, but Arn and Bobby ended up taking up Gordy’s old partner Michael Hayes on as their advisor so that they could take out their employers too. Kinda surprised Paul E wasn’t paired with the champs, but then Bill Watts didn’t like him.
Flyin’ Brian and Marcus Alexander Bagwell vs. Beautiful Bobby and Arn Anderson
Arn and Bobby attack early, but eat double dropkicks. Arn gets a cheap shot in to take control. Arn goes for a double axehandle off the second and meets another dropkick, allowing Marcus to tag in. He whiffs on a blind charge into the corner and hits his shoulder. Bobby wraps his arm around the post too. The DA break down the arm Anderson-style, including Bobby pulling out the Divorce Court. Finally, the flying kneedrop into the shoulder sets up Bobby submitting Bagwell to the armbar. This was a fantastic half-hour match condensed into four minutes, and not being anywhere near as good for the brevity.
WCW Magazine: Ron Simmons is the world champion, so let’s see him stumbling through an interview before he got the belt on the subject of the Super Invader as well as dancing around whether he’d challenge Sting in an Up Close interview with Tony. He then talks as the new champion in an interview at the CNN Centre. Appreciate the effort, but doesn’t help that you can see a canteen till behind him as he speaks.
Barry Windham vs. Tracy Smothers
Tracy is still being announced as half of the Young Pistols, even though Steve Armstrong was long gone by this point. First appearance on TV of Erik Watts in the crowd, watching on. Yeah, even with last week’s events the bloom is already off the rose. Jesse goes off on a rant, via Erik, about how quarterbacks should wear skirts, which Tony does his best to ignore, doubtless knowing Cowboy is listening and not best pleased. Tracy uses redneck martial arts after escaping Barry’s headlock, but meets taped fist when coming off the second and jobs to the lariat. Tracy would be in Smoky Mountain not long after, having never worked out exactly where Cheyenne, Wyoming, was.
Tony and Jesse look back at the events in Baltimore on August 2nd, focusing on Jake’s attack on Sting. Just filling time.
Ron Simmons vs. Doug Superior
Introductions are cut off, as this was recorded before Ron was champ. His opponent is a big Italian-looking guy in black trousers with a belt and white shoes. He dares to get a single punch in on Ron, so Ron just kills him after that, finishing with the powerslam. That was a Steiners-like massacre.
WCW Magazine: Confusing the timeline a bit, we see Ricky Steamboat seemingly beating Steve Austin for the TV title, but getting the decision reversed on him because he used brass knuckles that Paul E threw in. Their feud continues.
Ricky Steamboat vs. Cactus Jack
Announced as a match that happened a few weeks back, further confusing things. Ricky has the DDP tape around the ribs, giving Cacti an easy target. Ricky gets a comeback with a spinning neckbreaker and chops. It’s not a thrilling match, disappointing for both, but at least Ricky is committing to the injury somewhat, only doing his moves at half power. They take a tumble to the floor together, allowing Jack to drop the elbow on him from the apron and getting back in for the count-out win. I’m sure the house show matches were a lot better, but this stunk of something they’d inserted to fill time and didn’t do Steamboat the justice it should’ve, but that was the story of his career.
Close: Jesse takes this time to question Tony on why he never pays for lunch. “You never ask”, replies Tony, commencing a frisk.
The Bottom Line: Best bits were the brutal squash matches, but this was an example of trying to fix a mess in the editing room.