Prime Time Thursday Night: December 17, 2020

“Good evening, wrestling fans, and welcome to another edition of Prime Time Thursday.  Certainly a lot of action to catch up on this week, Brain.”

“You’re not kidding.  Everyone’s appearing on every possible show!  Next week we may have to have a guest on our show!”

“We’ve done it in the past; why not?”

“Just make sure it isn’t the Boss Man’s mother; there’d be no room for the two of us.”

“You really won’t let that go, will you?  Folks, the big story coming out is that AEW World Champion Kenny Omega, fresh off of become the champion of Mexico, will be headlining Impact Wrestling’s next event as part of an incredible six-man tag team match!”

“And lemme tell you, if you’re the Machine Guns or Rich Swann, you’re offended by this.  You see some guy waltz in and take a main event.  This is your chance to defend Impact’s honor… well, what little they have left anyway.”

“Oh, I think Swann and the Motor City Machine Guns have a lot of honor, and they’ll be willing to defend it.  In addition, we here at Prime Time wish to congratulate Cody and Brandi Rhodes on the impending birth of their first child!”

“You think he inherited that birthmark from Grampa?”

“I wouldn’t know, Brain.”

“At least he won’t have that crazy tattoo on his neck.  At least not until he’s 18 and he makes stupid decisions like the rest of his family.”

“You’re one to talk about bad family decisions!  In addition, folks, Sunday will see the WWE put on their TLC show on Pay-Per-View, with a huge double main event!  Drew McIntyre defends the WWE Title against AJ Styles, while Roman Reigns tries to remain the head of the SmackDown table against Kevin Owens.  And in both matches, Brain, there’s going to be all sorts of external hardward involved!”

“Knowing Kevin, he’ll use it all!  He’ll whack Roman with a table, climb a chair, and try to put him through a ladder!  He’s that kind of a guy!”

“I think you need to read the copy a little better there.”

“Nah — Kevin just needs to get his own brain straight.  Too much time eating and not enough fighting.”

“Looks can be deceiving with the Prizefighter, Brain.  We would also like to note that the newest line of AEW Figurines was announced, featuring the Young Bucks, Orange Cassidy, Riho, and Pac!  Available soon!”

“Hey, is the Riho action figure the same size she is?”

“IT IS NOT!  Folks, let’s go to the ring for our next contest here on Prime Time Wrestling, as AEW’s own Orange Cassidy gets set to take on Rickey Shane Page!  Let’s get down to the action!”

“Action?  It’s Orange Cassidy?  What action?”

(Bring the insanity.)