The SmarK Rant for Mid-Atlantic Championship Wrestling – 02.27.82
Taped from Charlotte, NC
Your hosts are Bob Caudle & Roddy Piper
Sgt. Slaughter joins us right away, griping that he should be World champion, and he’s got EVIDENCE later.
Terry Taylor v. David Patterson
They trade headlocks and Taylor works the arm with not much going on, while Piper puts him over as having gumption. That’s high praise from Piper. Taylor takes him down and keeps working that arm, while the hot topic of the locker room is apparently Austin Idol videotaping everyone without their permission, like last week. You know what SHOULD be the hot topic of the locker room? Terry Taylor’s armbar, which lasts 3:30 before the jobber finally breaks free of it. Patterson gets a slam and misses a legdrop, and Taylor dropkicks him for two and a backslide gets two. Patterson gives him a knee in the corner and follows with a backbreaker for two, but Taylor goes up with an elbow for two. And an abdominal stretch into a rollup finishes at 5:28. Patterson actually looked kind of like someone they might have pushed, so I looked him up, and damn if he didn’t get a bit of a push later as Fidel Sierra, the Cuban Assassin. Well that’s neat, he didn’t look like anything like that here.
Private Jim Nelson & Private Don Kernodle v. Vinnie Valentino & Mike Davis
Sarge’s guys trap Valentino in the corner and Kernodle drops a knee on him for two and goes to a chinlock. Valentino manages to tag in Davis, who gets a dropkick on Kernodle for two and a backdrop into a facelock. But Nelson makes a blind tag and beats Davis down with elbows before going to a chinlock. Meanwhile, Sgt. Slaughter bitches at Austin Idol about the unauthorized filming, and Kernodle gets a neckbreaker on Davis for two. The heels trade chinlocks on Davis while the fans actually get behind him, and he makes a comeback on Kernodle but runs into a boot in the corner. Kernodle powerslams him out of the corner and bearhugs him while Nelson hits a flying clothesline (the move that was the Road Warriors’ original version of the Doomsday Device) and Nelson finishes with the cobra clutch at 7:00. Mike Davis of course gained some measure of fame later on. And for those who haven’t been reading these, Private Nelson got an unlikely repackage a few years later as evil Russian Boris Zhukov.
Sgt. Slaughter has got some problems with Ricky Steamboat, especially after Steamboat turned down his challenges and spoke to him with AWFUL WORDS. So we get footage of Steamboat having a match with Ric Flair, only to have Slaughter and his Privates attack Steamboat for a 3-on-1 beatdown. Damn Slaughter, sticking his Privates where they don’t belong. Slaughter: “You can see me putting my Privates away now.” And then they go after Flair and Sarge puts his Privates all over Flair, too! Luckily Steamboat makes the save and beats on Slaughter’s Privates with a chair. Bob Caudle: “What a devastating piece of film that was, showing the Privates of Sgt. Slaughter.” Good thing they didn’t have Twitter in 1982.
Kernodle and Nelson point out that Slaughter just wanted to come out and shake Steamboat’s hand for a good match with Flair, but Steamboat attacked them like a coward!
Ole & Stan are here for an interview, but Jimmy Valiant interrupts and he’s dancing all over the place, which is exactly the kind of good times that Ole HATES. So they quickly get into a brawl and Valiant beats on Ole, chasing him out of the ring and robbing us out of our scheduled squash match with Ivan Koloff and some other guy. So Koloff tries to add his own beating, but all the babyfaces rush the ring and make the save.
Mike George v. Mike Miller
George gets a backdrop as we’re now joined by David Crockett on commentary in place of Piper, who got involved in the previous brawl and left. George beats on Miller with forearms and goes to a chinlock. Miller fights out, so George beats him down with CLUBBING FOREARMS, but Miller hits him with a knee and goes to a facelock. George escapes that with a suplex for two and they trade shoulderblocks, but George finishes with a shoulderbreaker at 4:20.
Ray Stevens is tired of Ole Anderson agitating people all the time. Yeah, he’ll do that all right. Also, if Slaughter wants to teach his recruits to wrestle, that’s fine, but ganging up on people ISN’T COOL. Jake Roberts and Blackjack Mulligan Jr stop by and they don’t like Slaughter either.
Bill White v. Ron Ritchie
Ron Ritchie is a very familiar face to Stampede Wrestling fans, although it’s funny to see him playing a young babyface here, because he was firmly into the grizzled vet role in the midcard of Stampede a couple of years later. They trade basic stuff and slug it out with forearms, and Ritchie gets a backdrop out of the corner for two and goes to the armbar. Apparently Roddy Piper is currently in the lead for the fan vote about who the best of 1981 was, which has the announcers questioning the voting process. White gets a slam, but tries another one and Ritchie goes behind and rolls him up for the pin at 5:00.
Afterwards, Ron does an interview with David Crockett and he’s also upset about Sgt. Slaughter and his antics, so Sarge comes out to confront him and Ritchie walks away from the fight. David notes that it takes a real man to turn around and walk away from the fight. A COWARDLY man, if you ask me.
Ole Anderson & Stan Hansen v. Don Gilbert & Kelly Kiniski
Gilbert and Kiniski actually get promo time before the match, and that’s a thing. Caudle: “Did you two work out together and do some wrestling together to prepare for this?” Gilbert: “Yeah, we talked it over and worked out some stuff.” I like their chances! Ole takes Gilbert down and rides him on the mat, but Kiniski comes in for some shine while Austin Idol joins us on commentary, clarifying that all the other wrestlers are jealous of him and that’s why they’re so mad at him filming the matches. Kelly works a headscissors on Hansen and shows off with some pushups while holding it, but Ole comes in and beats on him. And then Kelly makes the mistake of tagging in Don Gilbert, and the heels immediately cut him off and go to work on him. Stan gets a back elbow and then MURDERS him with a lariat for the pin at 3:39.
Stan and Ole join us for the victory promo, and Caudle wants to ask about Valiant and they immediately flip out and yell “NEVER ASK ABOUT JIMMY VALIANT!” before Hansen clarifies that he’s only real Texan around here. Ole: “They say the Japs are coming to town soon too.” Good to know. Also, the Mexicans, but I guess they’re less of an immediate threat. Ole and Stan as Miserable Sons of Bitches were clearly the guys who needed to be tag team champions, although it still took months to finish the series of tournaments.
Fun show this week! Hopefully Slaughter’s Privates don’t get overexposed, though.