The SmarK Rant for Smoky Mountain Wrestling – 03.19.94
Well, since Jericho is doing his 30 year celebration deal next week, I thought I’d check out one of the episodes of SMW that was put on the Network to feature him ages ago. I’ve given up waiting for them to fill in gaps for this stuff anyway.
Taped from the Dungannon Elementary School in Dungannon, VA. I’m not even making that up and couldn’t if I tried.
Your hosts are Dutch Mantel & Bob Caudle
Bobby Blaze v. Larry Santo
Santo attacks and slugs away, but Blaze is FIRED up and makes a HOT comeback, chasing him out of the ring with a superkick. Back in, Blaze gets another superkick for two, but Santo uses various cheating tactics to get some offense. Dutch rates this offense as an 8.6 in honor of the Winter Olympics. He goes for a suplex, but Blaze reverses to a northern lights suplex for the pin at 2:23. I mean, Blaze had artwork on his kneepads and boots that was supposed to be flames, but looks more like bacon, which tells you everything you need to know about him. ½*
Bob Armstrong joins us, hyping up the loser-leaves-town match between the Rock N Roll Express and Heavenly Bodies, which will definitely result in one of the teams leaving SMW for good. Also, Bob himself is facing Jim Cornette and a mystery man, but he’s not concerned about who Cornette picks. He’ll be there with bells on! Well that’ll make it hard to sneak up on anyone.
Meanwhile, on last week’s show, Tammy Fitch goes after the Dirty White Girl and rips her blouse open, which has Dirty White Boy asking for a back alley brawl with his woman against Tammy, which is basically a bra and panties match.
Beat the Champ TV title: Killer Kyle v. Mike Furnas
Furnas was supposed to be fresh out of training at this point, and Kyle attacks him to start and beats him down, then hits a sideslam. He misses an elbow and Furnas makes a comeback and hits a running forearm for the pin and the title at 1:24. He’s so flabbergasted by his own win that he can barely do a promo afterwards. Apparently his training didn’t go very well because his career came to an end a month after this.
Meanwhile, we join a “marathon match” between the Rock N Roll Express and the Heavenly Bodies at a house show, tied at 2 falls each with 5 minutes left in a one hour match. Morton gets a sleeper on Dr. Tom, but he gets into the ropes to break it up and then hits a jawbreaker on Ricky to put him down. But then Jim Cornette runs in from the back with an OXYGEN TANK to revive Prichard, and then he hits Morton with the tank for good measure and Tom pins him to go up 3-2 and retain the titles. And then we go to the back while Cornette talks about how the Bodies ran circles around them and they’re in the best shape of their lives, while Del Ray and Prichard are desperately sucking on the oxygen tank. That’s amazing. Of course, today if they put this on WWE TV you’d have Michael Cole telling us how Cornette was lying and they’re completely exhausted on the oxygen, Corey! Perhaps even talking over top of the promo being cut at the time.
Tammy Fitch and Brian Lee join Dutch and apparently the match on April 1 is actually a mixed tag match with herself and Lee against the Dirty White Boy and Girl. I believe I’ve mentioned before but it bears repeating that HOLY SHIT 19 year old Tammy looked like she should have been one of the biggest stars in the sport for years to come. Dirty White Girl charges the ring for some revenge, but Lee tackles her, so Dirty White Boy hits the ring and strips Lee down to his underwear and chases him back to the dressing room. I don’t think it can understated how effective that the promise of Tammy being stripped down to her underwear must have been at the time.
Jim Cornette promises that after 10 years of feuding, it’s COMING TO AN END with the Rock N Roll Express on April 1 at the Bluegrass Brawl. Also Bob will never guess who his mystery partner is goinna be. It might even be Yokozuna! Or Kevin Sullivan! Spoiler: It was Bruiser Bedlam, who was Cornette’s pet project until nearly the end of the promotion.
The Thrillseekers v. The Infernos
Yes, Chris Jericho and Lance Storm finally make their debut after weeks of vignettes. FROM CANADA. Where all the Thrillseekers come, climbing the mountains of Saskatchewan and braving the drive from Edmonton to Calgary without coffee. Storm hits one of the Infernos with a springboard bodyblock for two and hits a dropkick. Over to Jericho for a springboard shoulderblock to the apron, and back in for a delayed suplex that gets two. Double missile dropkick finishes at 3:00 as the crowd squeals for them. And Dutch even scores them a 9.95! That finish with both guys doing the dropkick off the same turnbuckle was pretty unique and I don’t think I’ve seen anyone else do that since. And then Jericho does a completely coked out promo with Bob Caudle, as he’s definitely mellowed out a lot in the time since this. This was all lots of fun.
Ladder match: Chris Candido v. Tracy Smothers
The SMW version of a ladder match sees a clothesline hanging over the ring with a envelope containing $2500 pinned to the middle. I recall this one going around the tape trading circuit for YEARS afterwards. Smother uses the REDNECK KUNG FU right away to put Candido down, and he grabs the ladder and beats on Chris with it. Back in, Candido fires away with chops in the corner, but Tracy fires back and kicks him to the floor, then follows with a baseball slide. He sets up the ladder, but Candido goes low. He goes for the ladder, but Tracy slams him into it and Chris ends up with the ladder on his head, allowing Tracy to swing him around the ring and then beat him down with the ladder. Tracy runs him into the turnbuckles a whole bunch of times and climbs, but Candido yanks him down and chokes away in the corner. He rams Tracy’s head into the ladder and drops the ladder on him, then chokes him out with it and follows with a snap suplex. Dutch rates that one 9.95. Another try, but Tracy reverses to a belly to belly , and then a splash hits knees. Candido slams him onto the ladder and goes up to the top, but he misses and hits the ladder. Tracy makes the comeback and slugs away in the corner, then puts him down with an enzuigiri and heads to the top again with a double axehandle. He got high enough on the move to just grab the cash if he had wanted, but that’s wrestling for you. So he sets up the ladder again and they both climb and slug it out on top, but Tracy suplexes him down and grabs the money at 7:48. Keep in mind this beat Shawn v. Razor to the punch by a week or two and was on free TV, too. This was incredible action for the time and well deserving of the reputation it quickly earned. **** And then of course Candido lays him out and steals the money like a good heel. But Tracy does his promo afterwards and he’s not concerned about the money right now, and they’ll have another ladder match at the Bluegrass Brawl on April 1 and he’ll get it back!
And we wrap it up with the Dirty White Boy, who promises that Tammy Fitch will be stripped completely naked at the Bluegrass Brawl. I don’t have to tell you that this did not happen there. Many years later, sure. But not there.
Well this was a pretty great episode, needless to say.