The SmarK Rant for Mid-South Wrestling – 06.29.85
Of course normally this would be the Mid-South v. Mid-Atlantic wars, but after I did Mid-South this week, I discovered that in fact the WWE Network is missing three weeks of Mid-Atlantic TV shows at this point. So much like NXT and AEW, Bill Watts gets to run unopposed for the next couple of episodes.
Taped from Shreveport, LA
Your hosts are Jim Ross & Joel Watts
The Fantastics v. Tommy Pritchard & Pat Rose
Rogers controls both guys with armdrags and the Fantastics double-team Rose in their corner. Pritchard catches Rogers in the heel corner for some shots, but Rose misses a blind charge and it’s back to Bobby Fulton, who runs wild for a bit and it’s BREAKING LOOSE IN TULSA, and the Fantastics finish Rose with a Rogers missile dropkick into a Fulton german suplex at 3:00. Neat finish! Fun little fast-paced squash with the job guys getting some shine, too. 1 for 1.
Kamala & Zambuie / Kareem Mohammed v. Jason Walker & Frankie Lane
Akbar gets a good line before the match, threatening to “beat the red right off Dick Murdoch’s neck” if he sticks his nose into Akbar’s business again. I’m not clear on whether Ray Candy is going by Kareem Mohammad or “Zambuie” at this point because they’re kind of using both interchangeably. The heels trade off choking and punching on Walker and Zambuie finishes him off with a splash at 2:14. 1 for 2.
Dick Murdoch v. Randy Beason
Joel Watts decries the “terrorist acts” of Akbar. Oh, for the innocent days when throwing fire at someone was considered the height of terrorism. Murdoch beats on Beason with elbows and he’s mighty over as a babyface, which he stops to appreciate before using a back elbow and elbowdrop combination to put him away at 1:51. Murdoch soaking it up was fun to watch. 2 for 3.
Buddy Roberts v. Private Terry Daniels
Poor Daniels is just getting lazy with the gear now, not even wearing the Marine uniform anymore and just wearing a crop top as his entrance outfit. The rowdy crowd continues their hot streak, giving the Freebirds a huge star reaction. Buddy headbutts Daniels in the front and back and rakes the face on the ropes, but Daniels slugs back, so Roberts hauls him out to the apron for some forearms to put him in his place. Back in, Roberts drops knees on him, but Daniels gets a bodypress for two. So Hayes trips him up, drawing a big babyface reaction, and Roberts goes up with a half-assed stomp and then finishes him off with the bulldog at 2:50. So when did spinning your finger in the air become the universal sign for the bulldog, anyway? What does that have to do with cowboy shit? The Freebirds continue double-teaming Daniels afterwards, but Dick Murdoch decides to come down and we get the hilarious visual of Roberts running for his life while Murdoch grabs him by the trunks trying to keep him in the ring to take his medicine. Match was nothing but the post-match was great. 3 for 4.
Mid-South TV title: The Snowman v. Dirty Dutch Mantel
Dutch grabs a headlock and Snowman overpowers him, while we note Eddie Gilbert watching at ringside, trying to get over his new “Hot Stuff” nickname. Snowman works a headlock, which is the one move it’s really hard to fuck up, but Mantel spits on him and Snowman chases him out of the ring with rights. Dutch thinks it over outside and comes back in with some shots on the ropes as he tries to get Snowman to sell something, but NOPE. Snowman slugs him down, so Dutch grabs the whip and that’s a DQ at 3:30. So Snowman grabs a chair and we get the classic whip v. chair battle, an allegory for life, but Snowman won’t even sell the fucking whip OR the chair, and chases Dutch to the back. 3 for 5.
The Champion v. Brad Armstrong
The Champion is the champion but this is not for the championship. Champion quickly goes for the piledriver but Brad double-legs him into the corner and gets a flying headscissors to take him down. But then he goes for the mask (SPOILER: It’s just Moondog Rex and everyone knows it anyway) but Eddie Gilbert runs interference and Brad stupidly goes after him. Champion attacks him in the corner, but Brad gets all fired up with dropkicks and a backdrop for two. Champion throws Brad to the floor on the kickout and then follows him out with a trip to the post. Gilbert tosses him back in and Champion finishes him off with the piledriver at 3:45. Ugh, Snowman AND Nightmare/Champion in back to back segments. 3 for 6.
Mid-South Tag team titles: Dr. Death & Ted Dibiase v. The Rock N Roll Express
If you thought the panties were coming off in the Fantastics match that’s nothing compared to the explosion of ovulation when the RNR make their entrance here. I think the entire female portion of the crowd instantly became super-fertile. Dibiase immediately beats Ricky down and stomps on his face, but Morton dropkicks the heels and they regroup. But then they walk right into the double dropkick from the RNR and get piled up in the corner. So then the RNR hit them with stereo monkey-flips and chase them out again. Back in, Ricky hits him Dibiase with a rana for two, and Robert comes in with a sunset flip on Williams for two. Finally Doc has had enough of this shit and just grabs Robert and hurks him into the corner turnbuckles to take over. Dibiase comes in with the fistdrop for two and goes to the chinlock, but Robert quickly fights out of it. Doc drops an elbow on him for two and goes back to a chinlock, but Robert fights out of it again. Doc tries a piledriver and Robert reverses out of that, and it’s HOT TAG Ricky. Double dropkick on Doc, but he rolls to the floor on the sell and they can’t cover him. Ref gets bumped by Dibiase and he loads up the ISOTONER OF DEATH, but Ricky rolls him up with no ref evident yet. So with the glove foiled, Doc loads up his arm brace and BLASTS Ricky, putting Dibiase on top for the pin at 7:50 to retain. And that was it for the Rock N Rolls, who jumped ship to Crockett. This was a hell of a main event, of course. 4 for 7.
And Michael Hayes stops by the desk to cut a promo and wrap things up for the week.
Good stuff this week, outside of the double shot bane of my existence that is Snowman and Nightmare. And yeah, I know we’ve still a got a ways to go with them as we slog through the “Out of ideas as booker” portion of Bill Dundee’s tenure. What’s the play here, bloggies? Move forward a year to 1986? Go back a couple of years?