Not much to say, let’s keep on going.
Coming up: A preview of the main event, strangely.
Intro: Tony and Jesse talk up the main event and an appearance from Sting!
Big Van Vader vs. Greg Casey and Doug Cazee
Still no Harley Race – must’ve skipped these tapings. Cazee is so skinny he’d have to tie knots in his legs to have knees and looks like a roadie for Lemmy. Vader has broken Sting’s ribs recently, so Tony and Jesse talk that up. Casey gets brought into the ring by his ears for daring to hit Vader from behind while he makes mincemeat of Cazee. Chokeslam for one, powerbomb for the other, both pinned at the same time.
WCW Magazine (w/Eric Bischoff): More on Sting’s injury, with a flashback to the previous time Vader attacked Sting. Pictures from the Omni (almost totally dark) show us the action and Sting having to be escorted out after suffering his injury. Vader attacked the referee and got disqualified. How will this affect WrestleWar? Not too much, to be honest.
Diamond Dallas Page vs. The Z-Man
Zenk has the habit of leaning into the fans to interact with them, but they all seem to back away as soon as he does. DDP is doing his insider gossip deal at the moment. Jesse wonders aloud who’s and settles on “that big mouth Jim Ross – Ross would sell out his mom!”. Tony struggles to stifle a giggle. Page is about three years away from being any good here, so there’s not much to the match, despite it being inoffensive. He’d obviously been watching some Randy Savage matches because he pulls out the neck snap and double axehandle. Page misses a charge into the corner and straddles himself to a big pop. Zenk finishes with a superkick and missile dropkick, pinning him with what looks like a teabag.
PSA: Barry Windham talks about steroid abuse. Well, he can’t say he didn’t use them with how much he bulked up in ’89, but at least he wasn’t a poster child for them.
Promo: Vader tells us the legend of Sting is over and declares himself the uncrowned champion and boasts of nine different world championships on three different continents. Actually, six on two, which is impressive enough.
Nikita Koloff vs. John Peterson
“Formerly of Lithuania, now living in the United States of America!”, announces GMC, like he hadn’t been for years. This is Nikita’s return to the ring after almost a year off, coming out to his new Rush-esque music. I fucking love Nikita’s intensity and looking out into the crowd. Nikita has heard by now about Jesse saying they look alike and has complained to Tony about it. Peterson annoys him too, so he finishes quickly with (Lithuanian?) Sickle. Good squash for Nikita.
WCW Magazine: Are Vader and the Dangerous Alliance in collusion with one another? Vader and Rick Rude recently teamed up to defeat the Patriots, so maybe. Good linking of the two, as Vader was connected to them through a lot of ’92, even substituting for Rude at Halloween Havoc. Vader cuts another promo mocking Sting, before Sting rebuts from home with his shades on and no paint on. He’ll be back, he promises. It’s just a broken rib, baby! And he ain’t going to the school of pain either!
Promo: Dusty’s back! One week until the Nintendo Top Ten Challenge, baby! But how do you do at Super Mario Bros. 3, Big Dust?
Ravishing Rick Rude (w/Paul E Dangerously) vs. Dan Garza
Rude is wearing an updated version of his 1990 pink tights with him kissing a lady on it, except he’s got shorter hair on these. Jesse takes credit for training Rude from when he came into his gym in Minneapolis as a teenager, in case you ever wonder why he was INCREDIBLY pro-Rude. Backbreaker and Rude Awakening finish. Tony promotes the Great Muta coming back soon again to team with Sting and Jesse wonders how Sting can team up with someone who was instrumental in the bombing of Pearl Harbor. Rare bit of disgust from Tony: “Muta wasn’t even born during Pearl Harbor! His father wasn’t even born during Pearl Harbor, probably!”
Greg “The Hammer” Valentine and the Taylor Made Man vs. The Fabulous Freebirds
The Freebirds are at least in better gear than the mix-and-match stuff they’d been wearing the last two years, but ‘I’m a Freebird and What Was Your Excuse?’ is to ‘Badstreet, USA’ as ‘Hunka, Hunka Honky Love’ is to ‘Cool, Cocky, Bad’. Valentine has a vocal fan in the front row as he peppers Hayes with forearms and punches: “There you go, Hammer! That’s why they call him the Hammer! My man!” – Greg looks like he appreciated it! The ‘Birds handle the champs well in this non-title match as Tony and Jesse finally start rubbing each other the wrong way in nagging old wife fashion. Valentine starts working Garvin’s legs and works through his usual offence with Taylor. Hayes comes in to commence the comeback, so Taylor dumps Garvin over the top rope for the DQ. Here’s where it starts heating up! Taylor gives Garvin a piledriver on the outside to take him out, then the champs double up on Hayes, with Valentine applying the figure four leglock and Taylor splashing the legs to blow his knee out, which they’d established already as their weapon of last resort. Match was alright, but everything after the bell, bar the referee going to count a pin after he’s already called for the bell.
WCW Magazine: And those four men are going to wrestle for the belts at WrestleWar! Couldn’t they have left this until next week, give the angle some time to breathe. The match was actually signed off the back of a previous match, which is just Because WCW all over. Also, Marcus Alexander Bagwell to wrestle newcomer the Flamingo Kid, Scotty Flamingo! Fuck, and they wonder why he didn’t get over.
Next week: Nikita Koloff speaks! And Tony better have his The Body Is Back t-shirt or he’ll be in trouble with Jesse!
Conclusion: Absolutely fine show, not spectacular, but good angle to close with the US tag team champs and the Freebirds.