The Thursday Night PRIME TIME Thread: August 20, 2020

“Good evening, folks, and welcome to Prime Time Thursday here on the Blog of Doom.  Gorilla Monsoon alongside Bobby the Brain Heenan as we bring you the calm before the storm that is SummerSlam.”

“And if you’re talking storms, you gotta mention the humanoids getting to decorate the ThunderDome.”

“That’s right, Brain; hundreds of the WWE’s biggest fans will be able to watch remotely from Orlando starting tomorrow night!”

“Do you realize there will be hundreds of cameras going tomorrow night?  Kevin Dunn will be so busy switching we won’t see a minute of the action!”

“He does resemble that remark, Brain.  For the rest of you, this is also a weekend with some important action coming to the Midwest as Crown Point, Indiana hosts a doubleheader on Saturday!  The opening show will be headlined by the one and only WARHORSE as he puts the title on the line against A Very Good Professional Wrestler.”

“…which one?”

“Which one what, Brain?”

“Who’s the very good professional wrestler?  He has a name, doesn’t he?”

“That IS his name.  A Very Good Professional Wrestler!”

“Are you telling me that ham-and-egger couldn’t come up with a name?  Just calls himself a Very Good Professional Wrestler?  Who does he think he is, Mr. Perfect’s understudy?”

“Well, I’m sure there’s a good reason for it, Bobby.”

“C’mon, Gorilla!  Just saying you’re something doesn’t make it so!  I bet he’s not very good at all!”

“Is that like when you say you’re the Brain?”

“What are you getting at!?”

“Nothing.  And in the nightcap, Kylie Rae will be defending the territory’s Midwestern title against Blake Christian, while the disturbing Gangrel looks to take a bite out of the flamboyant one himself, EFFY!”

“There’s a contrast right there.  They’re one manager away from being the Rocky Horror Picture Show.  I wonder if Gangrel’s going to suck the Time Warp out of the building.”

“Will you be serious.  Then on Sunday in Atlantic City, New Jersey, it’s another double-header out on the beach.  We start with the hometown Bad Boy, Joey Janela, taking on the Vegan Queen herself, Kimber Lee!”

“Some bad boy he is, beating up women.”

“Come on, Bobby, women have become a lot tougher than in the days you or I went at it.”

“Why, did they clone Mae Young?”

“Well, maybe.  And in the nightcap, new sensation Lee Moriarty will be in the main event taking on a territory legend in the Dirty Daddy, Chris Dickinson.”

“And don’t forget, Jordan Oliver will be there too, facing KTB.  What does KTB stand for anyway, Monsoon?”

“I’ll tell you later.  Folks, it’s time for our featured bout here on Prime Time as we go back in time to Chicago, Illinois.  Undisputed Era member Kyle O’Reilly finds himself going one on one with the classic cruiserweight, Zack Sabre!”

“There’s a real clash of cultures, Monsoon.”

“I don’t know, Brain, both men have that excellence of execution that I like to talk about.”

“No, I mean, one’s from Canada and one’s from England.  Well, okay, maybe culture is giving those two places too much credit.”

“I’ll have you taken out of here if you keep that up.  Let’s go to the ring.”

(Bring the insanity!)