The SmarK Rant for RAW / Nitro – 11.27.95

The SmarK Rant for Monday Night RAW – 11.27.95

Taped from Richmond, VA

Your hosts are Vince McMahon & Jerry Lawler

Rad Radford v. Ahmed Johnson

 Radford was such a bizarre gimmick, in that he was barely even able to establish himself as a headbanging grunge rocker before he suddenly decided that he wanted to be a Bodydonna as well.  And then that ended up going nowhere anyway.  Radford pounds away in the corner, but Ahmed puts him down with an ax kick and finishes with the spinebuster and Pearl River Plunge at 2:44.  Ahmed has some harsh words for Dean Douglas afterwards (I mean, I assume that’s what he’s saying, but then who knows?) and challenges him to get in the ring, but Douglas backs off.

Let us take you back to last week when Shawn Michaels collapsed in the ring in the aftermath of a beating from nine thugs.

Aja Kong & Tomoko Watanabe v. Alundra Blayze & Kyoko Inoue

This is pretty random for RAW.  The babyfaces double-team Kong, but Inoue gets overpowered and is your face in peril.  Watanabe with a surfboard and Kong comes in with a delayed suplex for two as we take a break.  Back with Inoue fighting back with a flying elbow on Watanabe and she makes a hot tag to Blayze, who gets a pair of missile dropkicks on Kong.  The heels double-team her, but it’s back to Inoue, and Kong drops her with a backdrop suplex and backfist to finish at 8:10.  That was certainly a change of pace.  **1/2

Speaking of random, Brother Love returns from getting killed by Ultimate Warrior six years previous, apparently now in a position of booking power and putting himself on TV.  This immediately comes off as incredibly dated and out of place.  Both the Love character and the gimmick interview segment in general quickly died off in the faster-paced Monday Nights Wars.  Bret has words for British Bulldog, and Bob Backlund bursts out of the darkness with a chickenwing on Bret to set up a later RAW match.

Hunter Hearst Helmsley v. John Crystal

Hunter pounds him down with a forearm and quickly catches him with the Pedigree at 1:30.

Undertaker v. Kama

Nope, turns out that Kama is on crutches (and had given notice in real life according to the WON), so Dibiase buys a replacement:

Undertaker v. Sir Mo

Vince feels like Kama might be faking his injury.  Mo clotheslines Taker to the floor, but Kama attacks and Vince is VINDICATED because Kama is fine.  We take a break and return with Taker cleaning house and finishing Mo with a chokeslam at 6:00.  This was junk.  DUD  Mabel of course comes out after that win, as does Yokozuna, and Mabel beats up Paul Bearer and steals the urn/necklace. This was literally the fourth or fifth “heel steals the power of the urn” angle in a row and you’d think Undertaker was getting pretty bored of it by that point.  Thankfully he would have the Diesel and then Mankind feuds to sink his teeth into within a few months.

Next week:  Razor Ramon v. Dean Douglas!

This show was another snooze, which is a shame because the previous week was a classic.

 

The SmarK Rant for WCW Monday Nitro – 11.27.95

So it’s the night after World War III, and Randy Savage is the new World champion in a twist that not many were expecting at the time.

Live from Salem, VA

Your hosts are Eric Bischoff, Bobby Heenan and Mongo.

World TV title:  Johnny B. Badd v. Diamond Dallas Page

Kimberly is now with Badd, but Page is bearing flowers.  Page attacks with the flowers and gets a tilt-a-whirl slam for two, but Kim finds a piece of chain hidden in her bouquet, which gives us some Dixie Carter level acting.  See, he CHEATED.  So the whole match is shot from the perspective of Kimberly for some reason, and she tosses Badd the chain, as he KO’s Page to retain at 2:04.  Badd questions who the chain was for, but Kimberly covers up the confusion with a well-time victory celebration.  *1/2  This was actually leading to the goofy bingo storyline for DDP and the “mysterious benefactor” angle that never paid off.

Jimmy Hart and Kevin Sullivan get into an argument due to the events of the PPV and Sullivan is ready to go his own way with the Dungeon.

Cutie Suzuki & Mayumi Ozaki v. Akira Hokuto & Bull Nakano

Clearly WCW had more lenient cocaine policies than the WWF did.  Hokuto clears the ring and chokes Ozaki out in the corner, allowing Bull to just wallop her and toss her around by the hair.  Bull with a splash for two and it’s over to Suzuki, who hits Hokuto with a dragon suplex for two.  Back to Bull, and the flying legdrop misses, allowing Suzuki to hit a victory roll and a double-team double stomp for two.  That’s crazy.  Bull suplexes both babyfaces and Hokuto flies in with a splash on both girls, then powerbombs Ozaki for two.  Ozaki comes back with a rana for two, but the faces collide and Hokuto gets a northern lights suplex for two.  Bull tries a powerbomb and Suzuki reverses to a sunset flip, but Bull sits down for two.  They all fight to the floor and Hokuto gets a dive that accidentally hits Nakano.  Back in, Nakano clotheslines both faces and Hokuto gets a missile dropkick on Suzuki and finishes with a SICK Fisherman’s Buster at 5:25.  GET ALL THIS.  ***3/4

Hugh Morrus v. Hulk Hogan

Hulk takes him down with a drop toehold and puts him down with a clothesline before slugging away in the corner.  Morrus rebounds out of the corner with his own clothesline and the fans are CHEERING him.  Moonsault gets two, and Hulk comes back and finishes with the usual at 3:32.  DUD

Randy Savage comes out for his celebratory interview, but wouldn’t you know that Hulk Hogan comes out like a crybaby to complain about getting screwed out of the title.  And then they lose their own tape of the evidence, because WCW.  This prompts the big, nasty, stinky, wart-infested Giant to come out and chokeslam Savage on the concrete and then attacks Sting, before big man Hogan beats on him with a chair as the third man in a 3-on-1 fight.  WHAT A SPORTSMAN.  So after settling his own personal grudge and chasing Giant off, Hulk finally goes to help his supposed best friend, who is unconscious on the floor still.  Thankfully Bobby still has the guts to call Hogan out for being the big orange coward he is.

Arn Anderson & Brian Pillman v. Sting & Lex Luger

Good thing Sting has a partner he can trust after the Flair fiasco!  Um, yeah.  Arn quickly hits the spinebuster on the injured Sting and pounds away, but Sting comes back with bulldogs on both Horsemen and we get some stereo press slams.  The heels regroup, but Luger cleans house on them and hits Arn with the STAINLESS STEEL FOREARM OF DOOM.  Sting with the Stinger splash and Scorpion, but Luger “accidentally” shoves Pillman into them to break it up.  Luger goes after Pillman outside while Arn beats on Sting to get the heat, although there’s shockingly little heat here.  Sting rolls up Pillman for the pin at 5:40 while Flair heads out for the ambush and the Horseman beatdown commences.  Hogan makes the save and then goes to beat up Luger as well, but Sting calls him off.  Not much to the match.  *1/2

Next week:  Nothing announced.

The whole Luger-Sting-Hogan deal continues to make no sense and really didn’t go anywhere in the long run, but that women’s match was the bee’s knees, as the kids say nowadays.