The SmarK Rant for Jerry Lawler’s Classic Memphis Wrestling – 07.29.19
YouTube has been RUTHLESSLY putting this one in my recommended list for a week now, so OK SHUT UP ALREADY I’LL WATCH IT.
Your hosts are Lance Russell & Dave Brown
Your theme this week: The Fabulous Ones!
Jackie Fargo starts us out back in 1982 with a promo about how great it is to be retired, including photos of him out on the golf course doing the Fargo Strut. But he’s been watching rasslin’ on the TV, and he sees Jimmy Hart taking “two geeks off of the street” and ripping off his gimmick. There’s only one Fabulous Fargo, and that’s HIMSELF…and Don Fargo. Well, that’s two. But regardless, if anyone is gonna be walking around Memphis in tuxes and top hats, it’ll be a team that HE picks, not Jimmy Hart. And he’s got a team that’s tough and will slap you back if you slap them. Not like the sissy boys from New York that Jimmy is trying to pass off as “Fabulous”. So he’s coming out of retirement and he’s gonna kick the shit out of Jimmy Hart for stealing his gimmick.
Jimmy Hart joins Lance in the studio with his New York Dolls team, and indeed they are wearing tuxedos and top hats, and Jimmy buries the Fargo promo and accuses Stan Lane & Steve Keirn of copying HIM by growing beards. And they don’t want the people behind them because they don’t need anyone. Where was THIS Jimmy Hart in the WWF? The Dolls were Troy “Dream Machine” Graham and Rick McGraw, by the way.
The Fabulous Ones v. Sweet Brown Sugar & Bobby Eaton
Lane gets a couple of slams on Eaton in a confrontation that would mean much more a few years from then, and the Fabs double-team him for a bit in their corner. Eaton comes back and chokes Keirn out in the corner, but Keirn takes him down with a HUGE monkey flip as Bobby just bumps all over for him. Finally Eaton rakes the eyes and Brown Sugar comes in, early in his career before changing his name to Koko B. Ware. And then it breaks into a donnybrook and the New York Dolls run in for the DQ at 3:00.
Next, we jump ahead a bit and meet the Moondogs, who are Jimmy Hart’s next attempt to take out the Fabs, and brutalize Stan & Steve and tear up their expensive sequined jackets, which had been passed down from Jackie Fargo himself. Well you know this isn’t gonna stand.
AWA Southern tag team titles: The Fabulous Ones v. The Moondogs
Off to the Mid-South Coliseum for the payoff, and it’s a crazy brawl before the bell, but Keirn slams Spot and drops a knee off the middle rope for two. The Fabs get a double elbow on Spot an Lane uses his white boy karate on him, but Rex runs in with a knee to the back to put him down. The Moondogs double-team Lane in their corner and Rex gets a backdrop and drops knees on Stan for two. Lane comes back with a sunset flip on Spot for two, but Rex cuts him off and goes to work on him again. Spot with a high knee and the Dogs beat on him to set up an atomic drop from Spot for two. Spot chokes him out on the ropes but Lane dives over a double clothesline attempt and it’s HOT TAG Steve Keirn. He rams the Moondogs together and beats on Rex, but Spot manages to find his bone and takes out Lane on the floor with it. Jimmy Hart takes the ref and Spot comes in and knocks Keirn out with the bone, and Rex gets the pin and the titles at 8:38. This was some rock solid tag team action. ***
The Moondogs v. jobbers
We’re joined in progress as the Moondogs maul the geeks on the TV show following their title win, complete with Jimmy Hart wearing the remains of the Fargo jacket, but the Fabs hit the ring and chase them off. So afterwards, the Fabs do a promo where Stan lets us know that the Moondogs are actually voice trained, so they just need to go “Lay down!” and that’ll be it for them. Also, they’ve got “milk bone dog breath” which makes it tough to wrestle them in the ring. Great charisma from the Fabs here. It’s hard to understand what a big deal they were in Memphis if you weren’t part of that time period, I think.
AWA Southern tag team titles: The Moondogs v. The Fabulous Ones
So this is the rematch and it’s a STRETCHER MATCH. So once again they have a big brawl to start before the bell, and the Fabs double-team Rex, as Lane double-stomps the midsection off the middle rope. Keirn beats on Rex in the corner and Lane slams him and then takes him down with an STO. Stan actually pulls out a chain, but Rex knocks it out of his hand and into the crowd. Spot hits him with the bone behind the ref’s back and Stan is busted open, allowing the Moondogs to go to work. Rex throws Stan over the top rope for some heat, but Lane fights back in the ring with the KA-RAH-TAY. Until the Moondogs cut him off again. Rex tries a splash and lands on the knees while San bleeds all over the mat, and Lane finally lunges over for the hot tag to Keirn. He beats on Spot in the corner while Stan takes Rex to the floor. Keirn is “busting the stew” out of Rex in the ring according to Lance. So Rex is bleeding now and Keirn beats on that cut pretty ruthlessly. But then he goes after Jimmy Hart on the apron, and somehow gets hung between the ropes and choked into unconsciousness. So Stan Lane desperately throws in the towel for his team at 9:30 and then tries to save his partner while the Moondogs try to, you know, murder him. And then the ropes release and Keirn takes an awesomely scary bump straight to the floor and he’s DEAD. And indeed, Keirn goes out on a stretcher, and the Moondogs knock the stretcher over on the way out just to be complete assholes. This was a fantastic piece of business. ****
Jerry Lawler wraps it up in the casino for another week.
Well, there’s only two episodes left in this series, one on the Rock N Roll Express and then one about Lawler in the 90s. I’ll be sad to get to the end, that’s for sure, because this was another great one.