The SmarK Rant for NWA Powerrr – 01.14.20

The SmarK Rant for NWA Powerrr – 01.14.20

Episode 14 – “Strictly Business Takeover”

Taped from Atlanta, GA

Your hosts are Joe Galli & Stu Bennett

LAST WEEK:  Scott Steiner returned to the NWA, and Nick Aldis invaded ROH!

The Rock N Roll Express join Dave Marquez at the desk, and Ricky is raging about the young kids today who don’t realize what they went through to pave the way for wrestlers today.  He’s gotta get up before the sun to pay the bills and feed his kids.  And he’s got a lot of kids.  Ricky promises that his title shot at Nick Aldis is gonna happen, guaranteed.

And now, the NWA TV title tournament brackets:

Tim Storm v. Winner of Dawson v. Dawson!  Ricky Starks v. Mystery Opponent!  Zicky Dice v. Mystery Opponent!  Question Mark v. Winner of Murdoch v. Latimer!

Zicky Dice questions what Ricky Starks is even doing here in the NWA, so Ricky calls him a “broke ass Guy Fieri.”  “I don’t even get that reference!” yells Dice.  Ricky lays out all the things he’s done, including Zicky’s mom.  That’s his one per list, I guess.

TV title qualifier:  Dave Dawson v. Zane Dawson

They fight over the lockup and Zane grabs a headlock, but they do a test of strength and Dave gets a dropkick for two.  Zane comes back with running elbows in the corner and they exchange headbutts and chops while the crowd chants “Older Brother / Younger Brother” in a witty bit.  So Dave goes after Zane’s broken hand, but Zane hits him in the face with the cast and gets the pin at 4:00.  This reminded me of my roommate getting into a brawl with his drug addict brother while I was trying to watch Halloween Havoc 98 and was about as professionally worked.  DUD

NWA Hard Times on PPV, coming January 24.  That’s the same day as When Worlds Collide, isn’t it?  That’s gonna be a fun weekend.  Well, sleep is for the weak, I guess.  Billy Corgan, who apparently still makes music in between living out his 80s mark fantasy with his millions of dollars, sings the theme song for us.

Meanwhile, Ken Anderson and Colt Cabana discuss their love/hate tag team situation, as Colt is pretty sure he can still save Ken and Ken doesn’t see the problem.

Ashley Vox v. Melina

I’m shocked they didn’t drag Melina out for a women’s Royal Rumble yet.  She beats on Vox in the corner and dodges a cannonball, then puts her down with a head kick.  Ashley gets a rollup attempt for one and that’s ugly, but Melina beats her down again and they trade forearms before Melina uses an inverted DDT while doing the splits for the pin at 3:00.  *  Afterwards, Melina calls out Allysin Kay and issues the challenge for next week, but won’t reveal who the opponent is.  But she should get ready to be destroyed.  Not sure how you’d prep for that exactly.

Meanwhile, at Center Stage, Nick Aldis pops up and attacks PCO after his match, and then moves on to Concord NC, and cuts a promo on Marty Scurll before getting thrown out of the building.  So this sets up Aldis v. Flip Gordon at Hard Times as the main event.  Well obviously the two groups have something going on.

The Pope is apparently now managing Homicide & Eddie Kingston.  Where the heck did THAT guy disappear to?  Although I don’t think Eddie Kingston needs someone to do the talking for him.

Eddie Kingston & Homicide v. Aron “Shooter” Stevens & The Question Mark

Question Mark now has a flagbearer, who is apparently studying KARATAY under his tutelage.  Stevens comes in with a karate kick, but Kinston easily catches it and the Shooter runs away in terror and hides on the floor.  Back in for another try and he gets suplexed in the babyface corner for two and beaten up by Homicide.  Homicide misses an elbow in the corner and Shooter goes to work on the taped up shoulder with an armbar on the mat.  Crane style elbow drop and he goes back to the arm.  I’d pop if he used HAMSTER STYLE when he was really mad.  The Shooter stays on the arm and Kingston can take no more and comes in illegally.  But this allows Question Mark to hit both guys with the MONGROVIAN SPIKE and Stevens gets the pin at 4:52. This was goofy as all hell but I’m into the Question Mark nonsense and accept it for what it is.  *1/2  The Pope is pretty disgusted with the performance from his new team and walks out on them already.

Meanwhile, Austin Idol the WRESTLING PSYCHOLOGIST, is here to teach you how to get heat.  Cuss!  Scream!  Hock a big green loogie at the crowd!  555-GET-HEAT

The Wild Cards & Scott Steiner join us and oh dear they’re giving Scott Steiner a live mic.  He’s also carrying around the NWA tag team title belt for some reason.  So he calls everyone potato chip-eating fatasses, and he HATES fat-asses.  But I’m confused, because he’s the Big Bad Booty Daddy!  Doesn’t that contradict itself?

The Wild Cards & Scott Steiner v. Team Ricky Morton (Robert Gibson & Eli Drake & Tim Storm)

Latimer beats on Drake in the corner to start, but Eli takes him down with a neckbreaker and Gibson comes in and trades off with Storm on the arm.  Storm with the neckbreaker for two.  Isaacs comes in and Tim hits him with a fallaway slam for two.  Drake comes in with the Eli Elbow for two, but goes up and gets snapped down by Isaacs.  This brings Steiner in for the first time with a belly to belly for two.  Man, the aura disappeared completely once he actually stepped into the ring.  It’s like watching Superstar Graham doing his comeback in 1987.  Latimer elbows Drake down for two and Isaacs goes to the chinlock and then follows with a backdrop suplex for two.  Old man Steiner comes in again and gets an overhead suplex for two and Drake was doing ALL the work on that one.  They choke Drake out on the ropes and Latimer gets two and goes to the chinlock.  Drake comes back with a DDT and it’s hot tag to Robert, who gets a sunset flip on Isaacs for two.  Sleeper follows, but Latimer breaks it up and it’s BREAKING LOOSE IN TULSA.  Tim Storm gets sent into the post outside, but Drake hits Isaacs with a stunner and Gibson rolls him up for the pin at 9:20.  They kept it really, REALLY simple for the aging contingent in the match and it worked well as a result.  ***

So next week, Ricky Morton gets another shot at the NWA World title, 35 years after his awesome cage match with Flair.  Think about THAT one.

Not everything worked this week, but this show has a direction and ENERGY and I’m looking forward to Hard Times because TOURNAMENTS ARE AWESOME.