The SmarK Rant for NWA Powerrr–10.22.19

The SmarK Rant for NWA Powerrr – 10.22.19

Episode 3 – The Twilight of Tim Storm

Two weeks ago: Nick Aldis beat Tim Storm to retain the NWA World title and end his chances of getting another shot, and then last week Kamille was offered the chance to give her side of the story and she declined.

Joe Galli admits that perhaps his last couple of interviews with Aldis have been “confrontational”, so for his next one, it’ll only be about his next challenger to the NWA World title.

Taped from Atlanta, GA

Your hosts are Joe Galli & Jim Cornette

Eddie Kingston bursts in and freaks out Cornette, and he’s happy that the NWA hasn’t taken away their title shot, but they still want those Dawson guys so they can bust them wide open. They’ve got nothing to live for and only have pro wrestling! That’s…a bit sad, actually. This was quite the crazy promo from Kingston to kick off the show, with “I love you Jim, but don’t steal my heat!” taking line of the show.

Marti Belle v. Crystal Rose

Crystal apparently comes from skid row and is heavily influenced by grunge. So I guess she’s not from Skid Row then. Sebastian Bach has better hair, too. Belle gets a headscissors and takes her into the corner, but misses a butt splash and Rose beats on her. Rose chokes her out on the ropes and sets up with a fireman’s carry into something, but Belle escapes and makes the comeback with clotheslines. Another butt splash in the corner hits this time and the Pedigree finishes at 2:21. Nothing to this one. *1/2

The Dawsons join us at the desk while the crowd chants “Dawson’s Creek” at them. Despite repeated orders from the heels, the crowd just refuses to shut their mouths, which seems pretty rude. They’re trying to talk! So they offer to fight ANY SINGLE GUY in the backstage area. But not Homicide or Kingston.

Thunder Rosa has half a skull painted on her face.

Aron Stevens joins us and would like to remind us not to make eye contract with him. “We looked at you” yells some guy, and he snaps back “Silence!” with great timing. He’s dressed like a pirate, so the crowd calls him “Captain Morgan”, which Stevens would like to clarify he is not. He’s promoting his new project, “Tropical Pirates”, which is available exclusively on VHS. In Romania. So we get some footage, and it’s no “Black Sails”. Or even “Cutthroat Island”. But he’s still got more chops than Ric Flair when it comes to acting!

Caleb Konley v. Dan Parker

Parker is a proud Canadian, so the announcers immediately bury him and then Cornette apologizes for the jesting. Just like a Canadian! They trade chops and Konley comes from the apron with a flying headscissors and gets a legdrop for one. “That’s a very American cover!” notes some guy in the crowd. Hook the leg, dummy. Konley goes up and gets yanked down by the “D-Man”, and a knee to the gut gets two. D-Man with a Canadian abdominal stretch, but uses the ropes like a real hoser and gets caught. Konley comes back with a backdrop suplex and goes up again, with a springboard moonsault this time, and that’s enough to finish at 3:25. Impressive showing from both guys, actually, given the short amount of time. **1/4

Tim Storm joins Joe at the desk, and man he just seems like a great guy to hang out with and maybe barbeque some steaks. He’d probably make sure to do them medium rare, the way all good people consume their beef products. The crowd makes sure to show their love, but Tim notes that Mama Storm still loves him too. Sadly, Eli Drake interrupts his introspective speech and he’s disappointed that Storm sounds like he’s hanging it up. Drake thinks Mama Storm is going to be worried about her son giving up and being a quitter. So maybe the ten pounds of gold aren’t in his future, but the tag team titles could be within their reach once they team up against the Dawsons. So Tim is gonna think about it and let us know. Come on! Do it for Mama Storm!

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Jocephus joins us and he wants to apologize to James Storm and shake his hand. Also some Canadian in him, I see. So Colt Cabana comes out and he’s playing the role of James Storm this week, complete with cowboy hat and beer bottle. And Colt plays along, but Jocephus turns on him and throws powder in his face, at which point James Storm comes out and superkicks Jocephus to death again. Colt seems to be set up for more of the same, but Ken Anderson pulls him to safety. I’m still a little confused about who’s supposed to be the heel between Jocephus and Storm.

Nick Aldis is here, strictly to be questioned about the #1 contendership to his title and nothing else. There’s a lot of choices for him, like James Storm and others, but no one has stepped up yet, so he’s gonna let it play out and see where it goes. So then Joe AGAIN asks about Kamille, and the crowd is like “LAY OFF IT, JOE!” Aldis is rightly offended and sick of all this tabloid BS and lets Kamille speak, but she doesn’t currently feel like it and blows him off. Good for her.

Meanwhile, we’re all wondering the same thing: WHO IS THE QUESTION MARK?

The Dawsons v. Tim Storm & Eli Drake

So I guess Storm thought about it. Drake gets double-teamed by the Dawsons, but drops an elbow on Zane for two after a neckbreaker. Over to Tim Storm and he gets a big boot and neckbreaker on Zane for two. They double-team Zane with elbows and Drake hits a middle rope bulldog for two. Storm beats on Zane with forearms in the corner and Drake comes in and beats on Zane with forearms, and Storms adds some elbows for some CLUBBERING. Zane grabs a bearhug and Dave finally comes in, and immediately goes to his own. The crowd chants “Mama Storm” to get Tim all fired up again and it’s back to Drake, who hits Dave off the apron and gets a legsweep and neckbreaker on Zane for two. Storm tries to whip Drake into Dave in the corner, but that misses and Drake splats in the corner and he bails to the floor. So the Dawsons double-team Storm and get a splash into a powerslam to finish at 6:43. This was fine.  **1/4 So with Drake still incapacitated, the Dawsons continue beating on Storm until Homicide and Kingston make the save. They chase the Dawsons away, and Aldis comes out to check on Storm himself as we wrap it up.

Another winner this week!