The SmarK Rant for WWF Superstars – 11.28.92
Damn, new intro for the show, with Yokozuna edited in now.
Taped from Terre Haute, IN
Your hosts are Vince McMahon & Bobby Heenan, and Bobby is pretty pissed at Mr. Perfect.
Bam Bam Bigelow v. Jerry Fox
Bigelow gets a corner clothesline and a suplex, while Bobby wonders if Bam Bam would be open to breaking Perfect’s leg for some extra money. Well, he WAS a former bounty hunter. Bigelow with the enzuigiri and lariat, and he gets a gut wrench and goes up to finish with the diving headbutt at 2:20. Ran a bit long, but still an impressive debut squash for the Bammer.
UPDATE! WITH MEAN GENE OKERLUND! Brought to you by cheap Coliseum Videos!
Let us take you back to Flair and Razor exiting the arena after Survivor Series, and they cut a quick promo against Perfect on the way into the limo.
The Headshrinkers v. George Anderson & Kevin Kruger
Vince notes that “one generation ago” there would likely be a shrunken head on the end of their spears. Afa is standing RIGHT THERE, Vince! Geez. The Shrinkers double-team Kruger while Vince again calls for Sgt. Slaughter to step in. It’s been a month now, he’s not coming. Fatu superkicks Kruger and bites on him while Vince is still railing against the poor officiating. Fatu chokes the jobber out and then Samu goes to an STF as this squash drags on. Finally they finish with the double faceplant and Fatu’s flying splash at 4:06. God, that took forever.
Event Center! With Sean Mooney!
Mr. Fuji tells the tale of vacationing in the “Polynesian Islands” and finding Yokozuna swimming in the ocean, at which point he took him to Japan and made him into a sumo champion. I somehow doubt that account. Also, Undertaker would really like to burn Nailz in the dark side. Sadly, he would never get the chance.
Meanwhile, Reverend Slick has seen the light and now he’s just thankful to have what he does. Well that’s nice.
Bob Backlund v. Tom Stone
Backlund controls with armdrags while Heenan keeps bringing it back to Perfect. Vince: “You need to learn get over things.” Now there’s the pot calling the kettle black. Backlund frustrates Stone with mat wrestling and finishes with the rolling reverse cradle at 2:16. And to think that two years later he’d be winning the WWF title.
Meanwhile, Harvey and Kim Chee assure us that Kamala will be much more docile and open to their training from now on.
Damian Demento v. Joey Maggs
Demento drops a leg on Maggs for two while the mysterious clown does tricks in the audience. Damian chokes him out and adds a neckbreaker, then finishes with the kneedrop at 2:32. This character was just dead in the water.
Meanwhile, last January, Shawn Michaels throws Marty Jannetty through the Barber Shop window in an angle you may have heard about before. And then he came back last month for REVENGE and was supposed to get a pretty big push out of it before fucking it up as usual.
Marty Jannetty joins us for the special interview, and they actually manage to find people in the audience who are visibly excited to see him there. Marty lets us know that he’s been recovering in his home for the past 8 months. Yeah, and they put a special “healing ankle monitor” on him while he was there, I heard. Anyway, he’s here to kick Shawn’s butt, and in fact he heard that he hasn’t even called Sherri to see how she’s doing! What a cad. When your featured interview is MARTY JANNETTY you’ve got a boring show on your hands.
Razor Ramon v. Gary Jackson
Razor beats on Jackson and stretches him on the mat while pulling on the man’s ears. Razor stomps away and gets the middle rope suplex, before finishing with the Razor’s Edge (which is named here for the first time on this show) at 2:47.
Crush v. Red Tyler
Bobby notes that Vince has always been a nice guy, who even helps people across the street when they don’t want to go. Ha! Tyler gets some offense before Crush cuts him off with a belly to belly and drops the leg, then follows with a press slam and tilt a whirl backbreaker as Bobby offers some extra cash for breaking Perfect’s leg. Head vice finishes at 1:42.
Event Center! With Sean Mooney!
Virgil offers congratulations to his good friend Bret Hart and wants everyone to take off their hat to him, and hey, if Bret Hart can climb to the top, so can Virgil! I think his logic is a bit faulty there. Also, Rick Martel is targeting Bret and High Energy is still coked out of their minds.
Next week: The Network’s collection wraps up with Kamala, Yokozuna, Nailz, Jim Duggan and Shawn Michaels!