The SmarK Rant for WWF Superstars–10.31.92

The SmarK Rant for WWF Superstars – 10.31.92

Taped from…wait for it…SASKATOON SASKATCHEWAN!

So this is a big ‘un after weeks of spinning the wheels. Buckle in!

WWF tag team titles: The Natural Disasters v. Money Inc.

So we actually cut to Gorilla & Bobby on Wrestling Challenge (taped in Regina), which was always weird to me. Why not just tape the title change on Superstars? The Nasties head out before the Disasters and put the badmouth on Money Inc and Jimmy Hart, which prompts Dibiase to shove a bunch of money at them. So they take the money and then attack anyway and lay them out. The Disasters double-team Dibiase as the heat machine is really overdone. I know people who were at this taping and the crowd was apparently really dead for this match in reality. Typhoon comes in and immediately gets caught in the corner and double-teamed as whatever injuries suffered at the hands of the Nasty Boys are already forgotten. IRS drops elbows on Typhoon for two, but tries a suplex and that doesn’t work. Hot tag Earthquake at 3:00 into the match and he beats on Dibiase in the corner and tosses IRS. And then the mysterious new team of the Headshrinkers comes down for the distraction, and Typhoon yells at them like an idiot while Money Inc runs Quake into the post. And we take a break as Superstars rolls on! Back with Money Inc. working Quake over as Irwin goes to a sleeper, but Quake fights out. So Dibiase comes in with the Million Dollar Dream…and Quake is just out at 9:26 with Typhoon not even trying to break it up, as Money Inc. regains the titles after getting attacked by the Nasty Boys before the match. The Disasters choked harder than Kyle Lowry in a big game there! (Am I doing that right?) Anyway, this was no good, but good riddance to the Disasters and their lame ass title reign.

And the Nasties interrupt Jimmy’s hard-fought celebration afterwards, tossing him off the stage onto Money Inc and thus turning babyface. And then they got their spot scooped by Hulk Hogan a couple of months later. Also, you’d think this would naturally set up Money Inc. v. Nasty Boys at Survivor Series and Headshrinkers v. Disasters, but NOPE. Never got either one of those outside of house shows. And in fact, the Natural Disasters last PPV appearance was Survivor Series, and they did a couple of jobs for the Headshrinkers at house shows and then Earthquake left the promotion in December. Talk about a fast fall from the top!

Yokozuna v. Bill Jordan

A very big debut here, as Yokozuna comes in fully formed as a character, albeit “from the Polynesian islands” instead of Japan here. The jobber charges in and Yoko hits him with a Rock Bottom and drops the Hulkbuster leg on him, then follows with a belly to belly and corner splash to set up the BANZAI DROP to finish at 1:48. Now THAT was a squash. Although he was still refining the character in some ways, like for example here he was much less stoic than he would become, sneering and laughing like a traditional heel instead of the more “silent but deadly” mannerisms he would adopt soon after. Still, hell of a debut here!

Event Center! British Bulldog is pretty sure he’s not getting shocked by the Mountie at Survivor Series. Well, he’s not wrong.

Meanwhile, Bam Bam Bigelow is coming back! Goddamn, this is like a post-WM RAW or something.

Tatanka v. Dale Wolfe

And then it’s ANOTHER historic debut, as there’s some kind of clown in the stands wandering around. Tatanka works the arm while Vince puts over the amazing range of styles that Tatanka can work. He can mix it up roughstyle style with fisticuffs! He can subscribe to the scientific method! Or he can, you know, chop guys. Speaking of which, Tatanka survives Wolfe’s flurry of jobber offense and chops him multiple times before going up to finish with another flying chop and the Wig Wam Bomb at 2:34. Man, the director is sure giving that guy in the clown suit a lot of screen time. Wonder if he’s anyone important?

New interviewer Joe Beavins (sp?) brings out Razor Ramon & Ric Flair for words about the Survivor Series. I don’t even remember that guy so he must not have lasted. Nothing notable from the heels here.

SURVIVOR SERIES REPORT! WITH MEAN GENE!

So yeah, we’ve got Warrior & Savage v. Ramon & Flair, Bret Hart defending the WWF title against Shawn Michaels, and now Big Bossman v. Nailz in a “nightstick on a pole” match, plus Tatanka v. Rick Martel in a dead feud and Undertaker v. Kamala. So we cut to a barn somewhere in Death Valley, where Undertaker is shaving some wood and working off a blueprint for a coffin. Do you really need a blueprint to make a wooden box? I mean, I’m no carpenter, but I’m pretty sure I could handle it.

Shawn Michaels v. jobber

By the time that this show aired on October 31, they had already taped Saturday Night’s Main Event and Shawn was the IC champion, although I guess it didn’t air for another couple of weeks. Although they acknowledged Bret’s title win from these very tapings a couple of weeks back, and we’re only now actually airing the shows that were taped! You need Doc Brown and his chalkboard to be a wrestling fan some days. We never find out the name of the jobber, because MARTY JANNETTY pops out of the crowd and beats the hell out of Shawn, then steals Sherri’s mirror and takes a swing at Shawn, only to miss and knock Sherri out instead. This was due to Shawn actually pulling Sherri into the path of harm to save himself. Who says chivalry is dead? Well, she’s a tough broad, she can take it. Shawn is so concerned that he uses the distraction to run for his life.

Event Center! Tatanka is apparently going to take back his feathers at Survivor Series, as though anyone gives a shit about that angle months later. Martel hasn’t even been wearing them in his last few appearances!

Next week: Money Inc. defend against High Energy! Plus the Headshrinkers debut!

This show was spitting HOT FIRE from start to finish!