The SmarK Rant for Mid-South Wrestling–01.06.85

The SmarK Rant for Mid-South Wrestling – 01.06.85

They actually just added a whole bunch more Mid South to the Network, which is apparently the final batch available from the purchase a few years back. So let’s jump ahead a year as we get closer to the “modern” era of the promotion, starting in 1985!

The opening has now been tweaked by Joel Watts, adding more recent clips with guys like Hacksaw Duggan and Terry Taylor.

Taped from Shreveport, LA

Your hosts are Boyd Pierce & Bill Watts

So first up, The Rock N Roll Express have regained the Mid-South tag team titles from Ted Dibiase & Sheik Hercules Hernandez on Christmas night (in a match featured on the Network’s Hidden Gems, I do believe) and the heels are pissed about it. So we get a video tribute to the RNR, complete with horribly overdubbed rock music. I don’t even wanna guess what it’s replacing. Probably “Rock N Roll Is King”?

Also, Bill Watts wants to stress that Steve Williams will no longer be allowed to bring the dreaded MR. HELMET to ringside. It’s only fair.

Iceman Parsons v. Rick Oliver

I’m assuming someone messed up because it’s clearly RIP Oliver, complete with “Crippler” robe, unless he was going by Rick at the time. Iceman has very LOUD overdubbed funky music. Again, no idea what he was using at the time. Parsons overpowers Oliver and rolls him up for two, then goes to the armbar. Oliver chokes him out in the corner to break, but Parsons hits him with chops and headbutts, then goes up with a flying clothesline for the pin at 2:50. Nothing to this one, plus it’s Iceman. But Watts talking about how Iceman wants revenge on Skandor Akbar does set up something later in the show. 0 for 1.

Meanwhile, the Guerreros are demanding a title shot, with Hector doing an uncanny promo that sounds exactly like Eddie’s future “Latino Heat” style heel cadence. So in two weeks, Bill promises them they’ll get their shot at the Rock N Rolls.

Chavo & Hector Guerrero v. Tim Horner & Shawn Michaels

Oh man, the Guerreros as the Trump nightmare team, complete with ponchos, bandoleros, and “Alamo Busters” nickname, are GOLD. The Guerreros take turns working on Horner’s knee as Watts relates how the heels refer to the US as “Northern Mexico”. Chavo takes Horner down with a flying headscissors, so Horner and this Michaels kid come right back with their own headscissors. Shawn gets a dropkick on Hector, but walks into a high knee from Chavo and Hector drops a leg on him. Chavo with a northern lights suplex and Hector comes in with a snap suplex, and Chavo gets a senton from the top for the pin at 3:07. HOT DAMN the Guerreros were pulling out the HOT MOVEZ there, working at triple speed compared to everyone else, and looked a decade ahead of their time. I think that Michaels geek might amount to something, too. 1 for 2.

Mid-South TV title: Buddy Landel v. Terry Taylor

They fight for the lockup in the corner to start and Taylor gets a hiptoss and works a headlock, and a hiptoss slam gets two. Iceman Parsons joins us at ringside, presumably to cheer on Taylor, and Buddy works a wristlock and takes over with a cheapshot in the corner. Slam gets two and Buddy gets a chinlock and slams him for two. Back to the chinlock, but Taylor fights out and Akbar gets involved and trips up Terry, allowing Buddy to hit the corkscrew elbow for two. Iceman goes after Akbar and decides to trip up Buddy in retribution, allowing Taylor to get the pin and the TV title at 5:21. So Iceman gets his revenge. 2 for 3.

Hacksaw Duggan & Private Terry Daniels v. Ted Dibiase & Steve Williams

I feel like this one was on one of those UWF DVDs put out by Micah Watts. Amazing how Dibiase can go from beloved top babyface in 84 to “King Rat” here and be incredibly effective in both roles. I mean, duh, he’s great, but still. The Rat Pack works on Daniels and Dibiase beats on him with the dreaded black glove in the corner, but Daniels brings in Duggan and the heels FLEE, and even the referee runs away in terror because Duggan is FIRED UP. What a great touch. Duggan beats on Dibiase in the corner and clotheslines both heels to clear the ring again. Back in, Duggan beats on Dibiase in the corner, and it’s over to Doc. Despite the loss of Mr. Helmet, he’s still plenty tough, notes Watts. Daniels comes back in and he immediately gets beat up like a goof, so Duggan throws a knee on Dibiase from the apron to help out. Williams hits Daniels behind the ref’s back, however, and Duggan has had ENOUGH of this shit and comes in take care of things himself. The ref tells him what’s what, so Duggan throws the ref aside, and Dibiase loads up the ISOTONER OF DEATH and hits Daniels with it, putting Williams on top for the pin at 6:00. Serves him right for Duggan being such a hotheaded doofus. Loved it, loved it, loved it! Give me all of this! 3 for 4.

North American title: Brad Armstrong v. Sheik Hercules Hernandez

For those who thought that the North American title looked ghetto in 84, the new one WAY overcompensates for that by turning giant and gawdy. Test of strength to start and Brad gets some dropkicks on Hercules. So…doesn’t it kind of make for awkward religious issues when a Greek god is supposedly a Sheik? Is it like Judaism where Hercules would have to convert, or is like how Bret Hart has dual citizenship between the US and Canada? Herc with a delayed suplex for two and a backbreaker, but Brad reverses to a cradle for two. Armstrong makes the comeback, but misses a dropkick and Herc gets the dreaded Shinin…shinanam…cobra sleeper. Brad runs Herc into the ref by accident to break the hold, and Herc goes up, but Iceman comes out again and pushes him off, and Akbar runs in for the DQ at 5:00. Brad looked good here. 4 for 5.

Kamala v. David Diamond

Boom, splash, goodbye, at 0:30. Kamala was looking positively svelte here compared to how pudgy he got just a couple of years later. 4 for 6.

Jake The Snake Roberts v. Rocky King

Time is rapidly expiring so we’re going fast. Jake is definitely into his slimy heel phase now, although the pajama pants aren’t particularly intimidating. The snake tights were an important part of the puzzle. Jake destroys King with knees and suplexes him onto the top rope, then finishes with the DDT at 1:12 to send us home. Awesome squash. 5 for 7.

Next week: Brad Armstrong defends the title against Dr. Death!