The SmarK Rant for NWA Worldwide Wrestling–01.30.88

The SmarK Rant for NWA Worldwide Wrestling – 01.30.88

This did OK last time, so we’ll try it again and see how it goes.

Taped from Charlotte, NC

Your hosts are Tony and David.

So first up, everyone is excited because a match between Barry Windham and Tully Blanchard ended via INSTANT REPLAY. Oooo, how futuristic! Sadly, we don’t get the Dusty v. Bobby Eaton US title match hyped last week, due to legal wrangling from Jim Cornette.

Let us take you back to last week, as we get the finish of the Midnight Express v. Superpowers cage match that ended off the show, as only Dusty Rhodes could book a cage match with DQ finish. In this case, Dick Murdoch running in and attacking the babyfaces. Oh, 1988. And they wondered why the territory died.

The Road Warriors are READY for the bench press challenge with the Powers of Pain in Greensboro, and the heels are gonna be all embarrassed and look like complete idiots when they are unable to keep up with the Warriors’ weightlifting prowess.

Sting v. Gary Royal

Funny spot to start as Gary throws a dropkick and Sting doesn’t even move and just glares at him. He stomps away in the corner, but Gary gets a brief flurry and then decides to go to the top rope for god knows what reason. Sting is amused and slams him off, then finishes with the Stinger splash and Deathlock at 1:34. I think they’ve got something with this kid.

CALL THE WRESTLING HOT LINE! 1-900-660-9000! Odds are good it’s probably a sex line now.

Oh, don’t forget to order your video cassette of Starrcade 87, two hours for $20! Speaking of sex workers, that’s cheaper than your mom charges!

The Varsity Club wants to stress that they might not have technically won the TV title from Nikita Koloff yet, but they’ve managed to hurt him and are getting closer. Rotunda gets the title first on behalf of the club, you see, and then Rick Steiner gets to win it second. So they’re building to that storyline even at the very beginning! So we get a clip of Rotunda getting DQ’d against Nikita (because Dusty) and then the Club comes in for the beatdown. Jesus, even the video recaps have screwjob finishes.

Over to Richmond, VA, with Tully Blanchard challenging Barry Windham for the prized, esteemed, Western States Heritage Championship, as they’ve gone 28 minutes into a 30 minute time limit match. Barry is selling the knee and tries to come back with a superplex, but the leg gives way. Barry gets one last lariat for two, but the bell rings (which turns out to be JJ Dillon) and Tommy Young thinks it’s a draw. Lex Luger comes out right away and yells at the ref, so Tommy checks the monitor at ringside, which reveals JJ ringing the bell at the 28:00 mark. So the match continues and Tully immediately cradles Windham for two, but now Luger stops the count and the Horsemen just run in for a DQ and beatdown instead. How many screwjobs can Dusty squeeze into a one-hour show? Well, three so far. Mega-heat for the Horsemen beatdown, with some redneck actually running into the ring trying to save Barry before getting hauled off, and then Sting saves for real.

Afterwards, Luger offers the Megapower Handshake to Barry and promises to be his friend and have his back from now on.

Dusty Rhodes is here and Jim Cornette’s men are AFRAID to face him! Both Eaton and Lane are yellow, egg-sucking dogs, and Murdoch is even worse than that.

Dusty Rhodes v. Mark Fleming

Fleming foolishly attacks the bookerman and gets elbowed at 0:12 for his troubles.

The Rock N Roll Express v. The Sheepherders

Finally, I can hear “Boogie Woogie Street” in all its cheesy and stupid glory again. God bless you, YouTube. I actually didn’t know this match was a real thing that happened. Of course, I probably watched this very episode at the time and just forgot about it. RNR cleans house right away, but Luke pounds away with forearms on Ricky, and the Express hits him with the double dropkick for his troubles and he goes flying out of the ring on the bump. Butch goes to work on Ricky in the ring, but Robert switches in and the Express traps Butch in their corner. Butch tries to haul Ricky back for a shot into Luke’s knee, but he gets distracted by the fans and Ricky runs him into his own partner in a funny spot. That’s classic. Luke comes in and chokes Robert down, however, and we take a break. Back with Robert getting brutalized and thrown onto the floor, and Butch runs him into the railing behind the ref’s back. Back in, Butch with a running knee to the ribs, but Luke misses an elbow and Ricky gets the hot tag and takes care of both Sheepherders. Crossbody gets two on Luke and they hit the double dropkick, but Johnny Ace runs in for the DQ at 5:39 aired. Yup, a FOURTH screwjob on this very program. Ace tries to cut Morton’s hair and gets run off, and I believe Dusty actually wanted them to do that angle for real and that’s why the Express departed immediately after this. They were having a corking good scrap until the stupid finish. ***

The Powers of Pain v. Kendall Windham & David Isley

Ballbearing quickly hits David with a powerslam and Warlord comes in for a press slam, setting up the Barbarian’s flying headbutt to finish at 1:20.

DON’T FORGET TO CALL THE WRESTLING HOT LINE! If you’re on MCI or Sprint, it’s 1-0-288-660-9000. That’s a lot of numbers to ask this show’s audience to remember. That’s like when Bart was dialing to Antarctica.

Paul Jones cuts the promo for the Powers of Pain while they stand there and flex. It is in fact the Road Warriors who will be embarrassed at the bench press challenge!

Larry Zbyszko v. Curtis Thompson

The announcers make vague reference to Larry being happy about his “big victory”, because this was taped before the Bunkhouse Stampede where he won the illustrious, prestigious, ultra-important Western States Heritage championship and aired afterwards. Neckbreaker finishes the future Firebreaker Chip in 1:40.

The Four Horsemen have conquered all their enemies and have nothing left to do, so they’re going to beat the shit out of Lex Luger to teach him a lesson about messing with their matches.

Jim Cornette is here to clarify why he pulled Bobby Eaton out of the match with Dusty, and Jim Crockett himself comes out to force him to make the match next week OR ELSE. What a weird angle. Why is Dusty Rhodes chasing half of the US tag champions for a match?

The Varsity Club v. Max McGyver & another jobber

They throw the unknown jobber around for a bit and McGyver comes in and Rick puts him away with a sugar hold in 1:20.

Next week: No idea. Probably fallout from the Bunkhouse PPV and probably something about Rotunda winning the TV title, since that was happening at the same time this show was airing.