SMOKY MOUNTAIN WRESTLING TV – SEPTEMBER 12TH, 1992
– Last week on SMW TV… The Heavenly Bodies defeated The Fantastics to become the 2-time SMW Tag Team Champions when Jim Cornette assaulted Bobby Fulton with an ether-soaked rag. Whoops, sorry, he was treating a cut and that no-good alcoholic passed out in the ring. The win not only netted them the Tag Team gold but saved Mama Cornette’s $20,000 as well… Brian Lee’s been attacked again, but now we find out through an anonymous letter that the (games)master behind the attacks will reveal himself in due time. I think that hint gave it away, but it’s a reference that’s 30+ years old, so maybe it’ll jump over the heads of my readers… Tim Horner still wants a title shot, Dirty White Boy thinks Tim Horner is a bum, and the Piledriver War wages on between Mr. Wonderful and the Hands of Stone.
– Taped from the Pikeville College Gym in Pikeville, KY (finally, a new taping cycle!), with Bob Caudle and “Dirty” Dutch Mantell calling the action, unless otherwise noted. This week, we’ll see “Mr. Wonderful” Paul Orndorff and Tim Horner in action. We’ll have comments from Jim Cornette and his Heavenly Bodies, and an Update on the Bounty put on Brian Lee’s head. The Dirty White Boy defends the SMW Heavyweight Championship. In the TV Main Event, Robert Fuller and Jimmy Golden face “Nitro” Danny Davis and Dixie Dy-No-Mite. Finally, on Down & Dirty with Dutch, this week’s guests will be Bob Armstrong and “The Most Wanted Man in America” Brian Lee.
– “Mr. Wonderful” Paul Orndorff vs. Ben Jordan:
Orndorff continues to be one of, if not the only, performers to come out without entrance music. Lockup and Jordan goes to work on the arm. Dutch downplays any potential involvement of Orndorff with the bounty on Brian Lee’s head. Orndorff pops Jordan in the ropes with a pair of elbows and sends him into the turnbuckle. Orndorff stomps away in the corner and steps on the poor guy’s face to show him his place. Whip is reversed and Jordan takes Orndorff over with an arm drag. He follows up with a pair of dropkicks but misses a flying body press. Orndorff with more boots and a rake of the eyes with the laces. Now it’s Orndorff’s turn to go to the top rope and he hits a flying knee across the back of the neck for three at 2:22. In case you forgot, the Piledriver is BANNED. Post-match, Orndorff teases a Piledriver, but referee Mark Curtis (Brian Hildebrand) waves it off.
– Bob Caudle is standing by for a post-match interview with Mr. Wonderful. Bob Armstrong is singling him out because he has the face of Robert Redford, the body of Arnold Schwarzenegger, and the mind of Albert Einstein. He’s tired of crybabies and promises to piledrive Ronnie Garvin. That was very generic of him.
– Highlights from the closing moments of last week’s Main Event between The Fantastics and The Heavenly Bodies, where Jim Cornette knocked Bobby Fulton unconscious with an ether-soaked towel to help his team regain the Tag Team Titles (and keep possession of the $20,000 Cornette’s mother fronted them).
– Bobby and Jackie Fulton accuse Jim Cornette on cheating them out of the Tag Team Titles. Bobby says when he woke up, the smell stuck with him for a couple of days, but the hatred he has for Cornette and the Heavenly Bodies continues. He says they have a surprise for them, and they’ve got a return title match signed. This time Cornette will be handcuffed to Commissioner Bob Armstrong!
– Bob Caudle is standing by with Jim Cornette and the SMW Tag Team Champions, The Heavenly Bodies. Stan Lane says he’s been around the business for 13-years, and of all the injuries he’s had, nothing is as bad as what the Fantastics have done to him, forcing him to wear head-gear to avoid permanent brain damage. Tom Prichard says they don’t associate with any women from the Smoky Mountain area because they’ve got their own from LA, New York, and even Texas. Jim Cornette says maybe the “Ether Bunny” came a little early this year. He disputes having to be handcuffed like a common criminal, then accuses of Armstrong of having it out for his team. He says Killer Kyle will have his hands on the $10,000 bounty on Brian Lee’s head and says after being pestered about the Rock ‘n’ Roll Express, he’s signed a title defense for next week, and when the Rock ‘n’ Roll Express lose, they’ll never got another shot at the titles.
– Phil Raney is standing by to hype upcoming SMW events. They’ll be at Haysi, VA on October 12th, with 10-matches signed to take place (this ends up being a TV taping, and no matches are announced). Also, SMW returns to Beckley, WV on October 3rd. Paul Orndorff takes on Ronnie Garvin, the Dirty White Boy defends the SMW Heavyweight Title against Tim Horner, The Heavenly Bodies defend the Tag Team Titles against The Fantastics with Jim Cornette handcuffed at ringside, and in a Barbwire Cage Match, The Rock ‘n’ Roll Express face Robert Fuller and Jimmy Golden.
– Bob Caudle hypes the “Dream Match Contest, where the fans can send in their requests for matches. Just write to Smoky Mountain Wrestling, P.O. Box 1279, Morristown, TN 37816-1279. Matches will be selected throughout the month of November. Weekly winners receive video tapes and t-shirts valued at $50, and the grand prize is an ALL EXPENSES TRIP to Thanksgiving Thunder. That includes Hotel and Limousine, Ringside Tickets, and Dinner with your favorite wrestler! I wonder if Morristown had a Dairy Queen in 1992.
– White Lightnin’ Tim Horner vs. “Golden Boy” Joe Cazana:
The uncrowned #1 contender is still looking for respect and a title opportunity from the Dirty White Boy. Lockup and Horner takes Cazana over with a snap mare. Cazana complains about a hair-pull. Ron Wright comes out to address the title offer situation, accusing Horner of harassing him on the phone at 4 in the morning. Horner and Cazana trade wrist-locks. White Boy asks who has Tim Horner beat in Smoky Mountain to earn a shot at the title? Wright outright claims he’s fighting nothing but tomato cans. Horner with a take down into a hammer-lock. Caudle claims “that’s action and excitement.” I call it basic prelim work. Whip to the corner and Horner meet s a knee. Cazana comes off the ropes with a swinging neck breaker. Horner quickly regains control, taking Cazana out of the corner with a hip toss, followed by a snap suplex. Horner avoids a charge into the corner and the Natural Bridge finishes at 3:37. Meh. According to my sources, Cazana’s final TV appearance for quite a while.
– Tim Horner confronts Ron Wright and the Dirty White Boy about ducking him. Wright says he’s an old broken-down man and his harassment is bringing on a heart attack. Horner just wants to know if his name is in the hat. Wright assures him that is name, along with all the other contenders in SMW, are in there. We’re, what, 8-months into SMW’s run at this point, and Horner STILL can’t cut a good promo. Between him and Brian Lee’s deer-in-the-headlights glare at the camera every time he talks, it’s no wonder the Fantastics were the crutch of the company for so long (and it didn’t hurt feuding opposite Cornette). At least Bobby Fulton knew how to emote.
– Down & Dirty with Dutch Mantell with guests Commissioner Bob Armstrong and “Primetime” Brian Lee. Dutch says the behavior is reprehensible and uncalled for (doing a 180 as he tends to do when in the ring with the babyfaces). Armstrong says he received a second letter. All the police and security cannot stop his henchmen from fulfilling their duties. Brian Lee will not be the last man to suffer, and all of Armstrong’s boys will suffer the same fate if they involve themselves. Armstrong wants to meet the man face-to-face to solve the problem and says anyone that is involved in SMW behind this will be banned for life. Brian Lee promises to rip anyone up that gets in his face, just like he rips up every wanted poster he finds.
– Bob Caudle is standing by with Mr. Ron Wright and the Dirty White Boy. They’ve let the Commissioner write down the top 10 contenders for SMW and promise to defend the title against whomever is drawn from the hat. The winner this week is… Newton Steffey? Somehow, with White Boy’s reaction and quickly crumpling up the paper and tossing it, I don’t think that is the name he drew.
– SMW Heavyweight Championship Match: The Dirty White Boy (c) (w/ Mr. Ron Wright) vs. Newton Steffey:
SHAM! SHAM! Mr. Wright makes sure to take some of his medication before the match. You’ve got to love the commitment of this man. Dutch calls Steffey the “Canadian Champion” to legitimize White Boy’s selection. Lockup and Steffey takes the White Boy over with a hip toss. Whip to the ropes, White Boy blocks a second hip toss and lays Steffey out with a short-clothesline. Caudle wants to see the paper that White Boy has drawn, and the name that was realty on the paper was TIM HORNER. White Boy with a clothesline and elbow drop. He plants Steffey with a slam and comes off the ropes with a leg drop. Every time White Boy goes for a cover, he lets Steffey up at two. The DDT and Choke-Slam finishes at 3:38. That was some tough competition for the White Boy. Tim Horner makes his way to the ring, with a microphone in hand. He’s seen that his name was on the paper. He says the White Boy is scared and a coward. White Boy tells him to do himself a favor and get his butt back to Morristown to momma before he hurts him. Horner responds with a slap. White Boy tells him he crossed the line and offers him a Non-Title Match. If Horner wins, he gets his shot at the belt.
– “Nitro” Danny Davis & Dixie Dy-No-Mite vs. Jimmy Golden & Robert Fuller:
TV Main Event. Considering the babyface side is a pair of JTTS’, the result shouldn’t be a surprise unless the Rock ‘n’ Roll Express get involved. Golden and Fuller come to the ring with a stretcher. BREAKING NEWS! Tim Horner faces the Dirty White Boy NEXT WEEK. Fuller and Dixie lockup into the ropes and Fuller gives a surprisingly clean break. I don’t know what it was, but I never noticed how tall Fuller was during his days in WCW as Col. Parker. Fuller counters a side headlock with a back suplex and struts. They go back-and-forth with hammerlocks until Fuller takes down Dixie with another back suplex. Dixie pops back up and scoops him up for a slam, then mocks Fuller with the strut. Golden tags in and has him arm worked over. Crisscross and Davis takes Golden down into a surfboard. Golden escapes but is quickly back in the same predicament. Fuller gets a knee to the back of Davis, turning the tide in favor of the Stud Stable. Whip and Fuller with a boot to the chest for a two-count. Dixie gets the hot tag and runs wild with rights and dropkicks. All four men brawl in the ring. Dixie misses a blind body press and Golden tosses him over the top rope (behind the back of the referee). Robert Gibson makes his way to ringside to distract Fuller, and as Golden brings Dixie back in with a suplex, Ricky Morton sweeps the leg and holds it down, allowing Dixie to get the three-count at 6:55. Cheating babyfaces? It’s the south, it’s expected. Just a by-the-numbers tag with a surprise finish. *1/2
– Phil Raney hypes the cards coming to Haysi, VA on October 12th and Beckley, WV on October 3rd.
– Bob Caudle is standing by with Jimmy Golden and Robert Fuller. They’re rightfully upset about Ricky Morton’s involvement. Golden says this won’t be over until the Rock ‘n’ Roll Punks are flat on the stretcher and hauled off to the hospital.
– Next Week: Tim Horner vs. The Dirty White Boy, and The Heavenly Bodies defend the Tag Team Titles against The Rock ‘n’ Roll Express!
Final Thoughts: Lots of hype for next week’s show, as the saga between Tim Horner and the Dirty White Boy continues, with White Boy finally exposed as ducking the top contenders and hand-picking tomato cans to remain the SMW Heavyweight Champion. We’re also getting a random match-up between the Heavenly Bodies and Rock ‘n’ Roll Express, predating their official feud by a few weeks. Brian Lee is still being stalked by an unknown master of evil, and Orndorff and Garvin’s feud seems to be never-ending. The news of a “Dream Match” Month in November seems unique, but we’re a while away from that, and I’m not going to spoil anything this far in advance.