The SmarK Rant for Lucha Underground–S01E23

The SmarK Rant for Lucha Underground S01E23

“Fire In the Cosmos”

OK, so I need a quickie show tonight, and a few people have been asking for the return of these. The show leaves Netflix here in Canada on 11/15, so it’s not likely I can finish the first season, but we’ll see how it does.

Your hosts are Vampiro & Matt Striker

Last week: Prince Puma retained the LU title over King Cuerno, and the best of 5 series between Aerostar and Drago was tied up at 2 wins a piece!

Dario Cueto is chatting with Aerostar on the roof to start, and reminds him that should he win, everything he wishes for has a price.

Trios Tag Team tournament: King Cuerno, El Texano & Cage v. Johnny Mundo, Hernandez & Prince Puma

Winner of this advances to the final three-way next week. Vampiro’s unwavering hatred of Konnan is always hilarious. And people thought I gave Konnan a lot of crap during the WCW days! Hernandez throws chops on Cuerno to start and toys with him before a slam, then hits him with a press slam and Cuerno brings Texano in. Hernandez runs him into the corner and Mundo comes in and throws kicks in the Tree of Woe, which gets two. Puma comes in for a double enzuigiri with Mundo, which is awesome, as Daivari appears to be checking out the match from ringside. Puma gets caught in the rudo corner and worked over, but he throws cool kicks to escape and Hernandez beats on the heels while Vampiro very grudgingly admits that this friend of Konnan might have some talent. Texano works on Mundo with a half-crab and Cuerno gets two, but Cage can’t catch Johnny and it’s back to Puma. Puma gets an amazing counter on Cuerno where he hits a neckbreaker and makes Cuerno DDT his own partner Texano while taking the bump. The faces clear the ring and we get stereo dives from Puma and Mundo, but Cage hits Puma with an elbow back in the ring. The heels take turns with corner clotheslines on Puma, but the faces come back with their own series of clotheslines and then hit a series of finishers on him, but Puma’s 450 only gets two. What an astonishingly choreographed sequence. Texano hits a codebreaker on Hernandez, but Mundo spears Texano. Puma with a powerbomb on Cuerno and both guys are down. They slug it out and Puma rolls him for two while Texano knocks Mundo out with a bullrope, and Cuerno finishes Puma with the Michinoku Driver at 10:30. Man, this just kept getting crazier and crazier! ***1/2

Dario Cueto wants a sneak preview of next week’s finals, so up next we’re gonna have a three-way match with one member of each team represented.

Cage v. The Mack v. Son of Havoc

Havoc quickly tries a sunset flip on Cage and that goes badly for him, the Mack cleans house on both guys. Havoc and Mack take turns with running elbows on Cage in the corner, but Havoc turns on Mack and puts him down with a big boot and standing moonsault for two. Cage posts Havoc and goes after the Mack, but Mack fires back with an exploder suplex and goes to the top, only to get cut off by Havoc with a rana. Mack takes a bump onto Cage, and Havoc gets two and grabs an armbar on Cage. Mack breaks it up with a senton on Havoc for two, and Striker notes the “PCP eyes” on the Mack. OK then. We get the Tower of Doom spot, which Striker actually calls by that name. I dunno about that. It’s kind of taking you out of the match to actually use that term. The giant men trade dives outside and Cage gets two on Havoc, but Mack breaks them up with a superkick on Cage and tries a superplex on Havoc. Havoc fights him off and then misses the shooting star thanks to Cage, who then finishes with Weapon X at 6:00. Quite the push for Cage. **1/2

Meanwhile, Dario continues spreading his motivational message, this time to Drago in the bathroom.

Pentagon Jr. pops into the ring and tells Melissa Santos to announce that he dedicates a sacrifice to his master, and then goes after Melissa with an armbar attempt! Vampiro is about to make the save, but Sexy Star comes out first. So Dario Cueto handles the ring announcing for the main event himself.

Best of Five finals: Aerostar v. Drago

Unsurprisingly, Cueto is also an amazing ring announcer. I so hope that WWE brings him for something when this company finally breathes its last. Drago immediately hits a brainbuster for two, but Aerostar springboards in with a senton. Drago hangs him in the Tree of Woe and dropkicks him, then hits a facefirst powerbomb for two. Double clothesline puts them both down, but Aerostar dropkicks him to the floor and follows with a crazy no-hands quebrada where he does a “trust fall” onto Drago. Back in, Drago hits him on the way back into the ring and gets a spinning uranage for two. DDT gets two. Drago misses a charge and Aerostar runs up his back and stomps him for two. Running double stomp on the ropes sets up a slingshot splash for two. Drago catches him with a lariat for two. They head to the floor and Drago finds a table, which Dario cackles about, thus revealing who put it there. What a nice character moment. Aerostar escapes the table and puts Drago on it, then follows with a tope onto Drago and through the table. Back in, senton gets two. Both guys are out. Aerostar recovers with a pair of cradles for two, but Drago dropkicks him and they’re both out again. They slug it out and Drago gets a DDT, and then wraps him up with a rolling cradle for the pin at 10:18. A bit disappointing, but still a hell of a match. ***1/2 The luchadors make up after the match, and Cueto gives him his Unique Opportunity: A title shot against Puma…but…if he loses, he’s banned from the Temple forever.

Well that’s a toughie.

Next week: The Trios tournament concludes!