The SmarK Rant for WWF Rebellion 2001

The SmarK DVD Rant for WWF Rebellion 2001

– Hey, it was $15, and had a good recommendation.

– Live from Manchester, England.

– Your hosts are Jim Ross & Paul Heyman.

– Opening match, I-C title cage match: Edge v. Christian. Christian attacks to start and pounds away, but Edge uses the jacket for nefarious purposes. He tosses Christian around, but Christian blocks a shot to the cage and gets the backbreaker. He makes a go of the cage, but Edge pulls him off for two. This is the goofy hybrid rule version of the cage match, by the way. Edge eats cage for two. Christian chokes away and gets another backbreaker for two. He makes the climb of destiny, but Edge drags him back down again. Edge fights back, but runs into a knee for two. This time Christian goes for the door, but Edge grabs the leg to stop him. They head up and Edge blocks a superplex and follows with a bodypress for two. Catapult to the cage gets two for Christian. We hit the chinlock. Edge fights back and spears him for the double KO. Edge makes the comeback and gets a leg lariat and a bulldog for two. Christian tries the inverted DDT, but Edge reverses, but Christian reverses to the Unprettier, but Edge reverses to the Edge-O-Matic for two. Nice sequence. Edge goes up but gets pulled down, and then rams Christian into the cage a few times in retribution. Back up and over, but Christian follows him up and crotches him. Christian looks to make the easy escape, but in a cool spot Edge pulls his legs through the cage to crotch him, and ties his shoelaces together! That is unspeakably brilliant. Christian is left hanging in the wind, and Edge walks out at 12:09. Solid match with a cool finish. **1/2

– Scotty 2 Hotty v. The Hurricane. They work off a headlock to start and Hurricane takes him down. Well, now Scotty’s mad. Wristlock sequence and Hurricane wins it with a clothesline. Slugfest in the corner is won by Scotty until Hurricane cheapshots him and tosses him. Scotty skins the cat back in and slugs away. Headscissors and clothesline gets two. Hurricane posts him to block the bulldog and gets a flying neckbreaker for two. Suplex gets two. Hurricane goes to the middle with a Buff Blockbuster and a rollup for two. Hurricane goes to the Vulcan Nerve Pinch, but Scotty fights free and walks into a hipblock for two. Hurricane works the back into a straightjacket camel clutch. The cape is donned and Hurricane goes up for the kill, but Scotty knocks him down and follows him up. Hurricane comes down and hits fist, and Scotty gets a DDT for the double KO. Slugfest won by Scotty and he gets a reverse elbow and superkick for two. The back is too sore for a suplex, however. Nice touch. Hurricane decides to try his own version of the Worm, but Scotty was just faking. Hurricane tries the chokeslam, then goes with a superkick instead. Blind charge misses on both parts, and Hurricane cradles for two in the corner. Eye of the Hurricane is blocked and reversed to the bulldog, which sets up the Worm to finish at 8:27. Perfectly Acceptable Wrestling there. **1/2

– Meanwhile, Chavo & Hugh are a couple of peeping toms.

– Meanwhile, DDP motivates England.

– DDP v. Big Show. Show tosses him around to start and hammers away in the corner. Page tries a headlock but gets sent to the floor and then back in. Page goes for the knee and then heads up for a flying clothesline. Figure-four is blocked by Show, but he stays on the knee. Show clotheslines him absently and hotshots him, but Page gets the Diamond Cutter out of nowhere. It gets two. Chokeslam finishes Page at 3:05. Nothing here. ½*

– Meanwhile, Chavo & Hugh walk in on Molly without her cape. Scandalous.

– Meanwhile, Kurt Angle discovers that he might just be sitting at the Round Table of yore. That one goes nowhere.

– WCW tag title match: The Dudley Boyz v. APA v. The Hardy Boyz. Boy, remember when there were two different sets of titles? I don’t even remember who the WWF tag champs were at this point. Bubba & Matt start and Bubba pounds him down. Matt armdrags him to come back, and a clothesline gets two. Matt & Bradshaw work together, but Bradshaw turns on him with a DDT for two. Big boot gets nothing. They head up and Matt gets a tornado DDT for two. Hardyz double-team for two. Bradshaw pounds Jeff down and the APA work him over. Faarooq powerslam gets two. Dominator is reversed and Jeff dropkicks him, but D-Von tags himself in and gets pounded by Faarooq. This match is dying. Neckbreaker, but D-Von walks into a spinebuster for two. Wazzup Drop is stopped by a rampaging Bradshaw, who slams D-Von off the top. Dudleyz give Faarooq a double-team neckbreaker and Matt finishes him with the Twist of Fate at 5:13, leaving Dudz & Hardyz. D-Von gets double-teamed with the usual and Jeff gets caught in the wrong corner soon after. D-Von gets the table, but the fickle hand of irony interjects herself again as Jeff dropkicks it back in D-Von’s face. BubbaBomb ends that rally, however. D-Von stomps away in the corner and Bubba puts the beats on him outside. Back in, D-Von gets two. We hit the chinlock. Powerslam gets two. Bubba drops the elbows for two. Jeff gets hung in the Tree of Woe and Bubba goes up and (I’m shocked, I know) can’t hit the senton. Jeff ranas him off the top for two. Taggery is all around. Matt cleans house and gets the yodelling legdrop on D-Von for two. Poetry in Motion for both, but D-Von’s misses. Jeff recovers with the swanton, but it misses and he gets dumped. 3D finishes Matt at 11:24. This was, as they say, for completists only, in case you’re missing that one Hardyz v. Dudleyz match from your collection. In other words, decent but lethargic and done to death. **

– I am reminded by a video package that Booker T & Test are in fact the tag champions.

– Meanwhile, Vince McMahon tries to negotiate peace between Jericho & Rocky. It works until Jericho makes a smartass remark and triggers a brawl.

– William Regal v. Tajiri. Regal grabs a headlock but walks into a back kick, to start. Pinning reversal sequence leads to a Tajiri headscissors and enzuigiri that sends Regal to the floor. Tajiri chops away but hits the post. Back in, Tajiri backdrops him and gets a standing moonsault for two. Regal overpowers him and waves to the crowd for two. Well, that’s certainly a devastating move. Regal knees him down for two. We hit the chinlock, but Tajiri bodyblocks him, and gets crotched as a result. Double-knee and Regal stomps away. Tajiri comes back but gets swatted down. He heads up, however, and gets a missile dropkick for two. Handspring elbow and Tarantula and Tajiri goes back up, but misses a moonsault. Regal Stretch finishes at 5:37. Pretty much an extended squash. *1/4

– WCW World title: Chris Jericho v. Kurt Angle. They fight over a takedown to start and hammer on each other. Jericho gets an elbow and a leg lariat to take over. Rolling vertical suplexes get two. Angle comes back with a german suplex, but Jericho blocks the Angle Slam and goes for the Walls. Angle makes the ropes. Jericho dropkicks him off the apron and they brawl outside, where Angle hits the post. He recovers and pounds on Jericho, but meets the stairs. Back in, Jericho goes up with a flying bodypress for two. Angle goes for the anklelock, but Jericho kicks away and posts Angle. Shoulderbreaker and he reverses a sunset flip into an armbar. Huh. He keeps on the arm and chops away, but Angle hotshots him. Belly to belly and Angle stomps away in the corner. Jericho comes back, but gets caught in a Boston Crab, which he fights out of. He goes up but lands in a belly to belly for two. Angle short-arms him and gets a suplex for two. We hit the chinlock. Jericho, apparently a babyface again, powers out but gets taken down and Angle works the knee. Jericho rollup gets two. Angle clotheslines him back down and hammers away, back to the chinlock. Jericho escapes with an enzuigiri and fights back with a forearm and neckbreaker. Rana gets two. Angle suplex is reversed to an ankelock by Jericho, but Angle makes the ropes. Angle tries to come back, but gets chopped. So he opts for the rolling germans instead and gets two. Now Angle tries the anklelock, but Jericho reverses to the Walls. Angle makes the ropes again. Evil Ref Nick Patrick messes with Jericho, but he gets a bulldog. Lionsault hits the knees, and the Angle Slam is reversed to a rollup for the clean pin by Jericho at 14:03. Now why couldn’t they ever do that sort of booking in the US for Chris? ***1/2

– Stacy & Molly v. Torrie & Lita. Trish is YOUR special referee. Torrie and Stacy start and some gymnastics follow. Okay, the match is already too long. Torrie rollup gets two. Lita comes in with a slam for two. She charges and hits boot, but no-sells. Backdrop suplex and the faces double-team Stacy. Molly comes in and pounds on Torrie. Stacy does her choking, and Molly gets a suplex to set up a unique camel clutch/Boston crab combo that gets two. Backbreaker and Molly goes up, but misses the Molly Go Round. Hot tag Lita, who headscissors Molly and tries Poetry in Motion, but Molly blocks it. The heels collide, and the Twist of Fate finishes Molly at 4:03. Torrie was horrible here. ½*

– WWF title match: Steve Austin v. The Rock. This is probably the final time we’ll ever see this match. Austin attacks from behind and chops away, but Rock returns fire. Lariat out of the corner and a neckbreaker send Austin sprawling, but Austin blocks the Rock Bottom and bails. Rock follows with the EVIAN SPIT OF DOOM, but Austin fights back and continues the brawl. Austin hits the table, however, and they head back in, where Rock dumps him again. JR declares it a Supreme Slobberknocker already. That’s pretty high praise. We head up the ramp for some more chopping, and Rock suplexes him on the entranceway. Austin tries a piledriver there, but Rock reverses it. Back to ringside, where Rock gets another clothesline and falls victim to a catapult into the post. Austin slams him on the floor and works the neck a bit, and we head back in. Austin stomps away and chokes him out, but crotches himself. He no-sells his own ballshot and clotheslines Rock. That was weird. Rock rolls him up for two. Austin gets a lariat to send him down again. That gets two. Austin tosses him again and they head over to the announce table, but Rock goes low. Austin drops him on the table anyway and does bad things with the TV cable. They exchange chops and Austin drops him on the table again. Back in, Austin goes after the injured knee and chokes away. Rock fights back, but walks into the Thesz Press and FU Elbow, with some extra FU on it. That gets two. Man, you’d think with all those middle fingers it’d get the pin. Austin clips him viciously and heads out to jaw with the fans. Back in, Rock tries a comeback and gets his own Thesz Press and FU Elbow. Man Rock is awesome. That gets two. Austin tries a sleeper and things look bleak for the People’s champ. That goes on a while. Rock of course revives and triggers a slugfest, and gets his own sleeper. Austin reverses to a jawbreaker and gets a spinebuster. That gets two. Steve goes to an Austin Crab, but Rock makes the ropes after a false start. Rock fights back again and we have a double KO. Rock fights back for real and gets a clothesline and the belly to belly for two. Ref bumped, with STANK on it, and Rock reverses the Stunner into a spinebuster and Scorpion King Deathlock. Austin gets his own unique version of the move, but Rock reverses back to his own. Angle and Jericho run in for some shenanigans with the chair, and on cue Rock blames Jericho. Rock Bottom for Austin, and Hebner is still out cold. Angle breaks it up and pounds on Rock, but gets dumped. Spinebuster and People’s Elbow for Austin, but Angle trips him up and lays him out with the belt, KICK WHAM STUNNER, goodbye at 21:01. Really good to a point, but it kind of fell apart near the end wth all the run-ins. ***3/4

DVD Extras You get Rock winning the WCW title back from Jericho from RAW, as well as Undertaker v. Austin & Angle from Smackdown. Nothing to write home about, but it’s two extra matches so hey.

The Bottom Line:

This is actually a PPV-quality PPV, if you know what I mean. Nothing too horrible, a couple of matches in the neighborhood of ****, and a bunch of clean finishes, not including the main event. Plus the last ever Rock/Austin match, which isn’t quite up to their usual level, but is still worth seeing.

Mildly recommended, especially for a cheap price.