The SmarK Rant for WCW Saturday Night–04.25.92

The SmarK Rant for WCW Saturday Night – 04.25.92

Taped from Atlanta, GA

Your hosts are Jim Ross & Bill Fralic. He’s seriously considering wrestling with WCW, apparently. HOT NEWZ!

It’s a baseball week, so get to breeze through this one at 42 minutes.

Scotty Flamingo v. Firebreaker Chip

We get a pre-match rap from Scotty, rapping about how he’s filthy rich and never worked a day in his life, but can still bust your cranium. Scotty works a headlock on Chip, who is proof that the Atlanta fire department must not have much of a drug policy. Chip escapes with a monkey flip and then lands on his feet when Scotty tries his own, and gets an Erik Watts-like dropkick for two. Scotty with a butterfly suplex for two and he tosses Chip. Next week: Alabama lead singer Randy Owen is co-hosting! Amazingly, they’re still touring and they’re actually playing here in Saskatoon next month. I literally couldn’t name one song they do, but rednecks love them, I guess. Scotty takes over with a snapmare and drops elbows, but goes up and lands on Chips’ fist, in a ridiculous spot. Chip comes back with a powerslam for two, looking so stiff and immobile that he might as well be his own LJN wrestling figure. Chip misses a charge and Scotty hits a piledriver to finish at 5:06. Had Chip used a finisher and called it the Backdraft, I’d have given this a pass, but otherwise this gets nothing and likes it. 0 for 1.

WCW Magazine Update! With Eric Bischoff! Sting took a hellacious beating from Big Van Vader at the Omni, and now he’s out until May, where he’ll return for the WrestleWar PPV. In other big news, Greg Valentine & Terry Taylor defend the US tag titles against the Freebirds. Plus DDP is banned from TV by K. Allen Frye. Louise from Maine writes in to ask why Steve Austin doesn’t leave the Dangerous Alliance and “wrestle by the rules.” Austin’s answer: “Louise, you silly bag. That’s a stupid question.” Awesome.

Nikita Koloff joins us in studio to finally answer the numerous questions about his motivations and future. Koloff’s Russian accent is veering WILDLY towards sounding like a bodybuilder from Minnesota this week. Like, he’s suddenly gone from barely being able to string together a sentence to complex English sentences with barely any inflection at all. Anyway, we cover Koloff’s recent history, and he says that he returned specifically to attack Lex Luger, who turned out to be a heel, and Sting was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. Well, that actually makes sense. Also, he has reconciled with the kid who painted his face like Sting at the Clash and now they’re the best of friends. That’s kind of creepy. So yeah, he’s Sting’s friend now and he’s only a phone call away. What a bizarre promo. 0 for 2.

Arn Anderson v. Larry Santo

I could be wrong, but I believe Larry is the unmasked El Santo. I mean, it makes sense, right? L. Santo! Arn chokes him out on the ropes and follows with a hammerlock slam before going to work on the arm in boring fashion. Spinebuster gets the pin at 2:24. Not sure why Arn was even doing singles stuff while he was half of the tag champions. 0 for 3.

World TV title, 2/3 falls: Steve Austin v. Barry Windham

They trade stuff to start and Windham gets the headlock, but Austin hits him in the gut and neither guy is able to get a suplex. They take it to the mat and Austin goes to a headscissors, but Barry slugs him down to escape. Austin goes to the eyes to take over, even after Louise from Maine asked him not to cheat, but Windham floats over with a suplex for the surprise pin at 4:13.

Second fall and Windham slugs away in the corner and rams Austin in the turnbuckles, then goes up and gets slammed off the top as a result. Austin goes to work on the back and hits a lariat, and then sends Windham to the floor and pounds on him on the apron. Windham takes a mighty bump into the railing and Austin chokes him down back in the ring and gets a slam for two. He hits the chinlock and we learn that there’s 2 minutes of TV time left and the finish is now obvious. Austin goes up and misses a legdrop off the middle rope, and Windham makes the comeback. He drops elbows and gets a small package for two. Backslide gets two. Lariat gets two. Floatover suplex gets two, and time expires at 10:30, so Austin retains via draw. It was really too early in the 2/3 falls gimmick to do that screwjob finish, but Windham had his working boots on tonight. 1 for 4.

Not much to this week, but the Windham v. Austin match is worth watching, with an even better one to come in a couple of weeks.

Next week: Arn Anderson v. Big Josh! A main event in any armory in the country.