Impact Wrestling – May 3, 2018

Impact Wrestling
Date: May 3, 2018
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Don Callis, Josh Matthews

Things are starting to get more interesting around here and a lot of that is stemming from the World Title scene. Pentagon Jr. won the World Title at Redemption and now a nice list of people are starting to go after him. It seems that Austin Aries is at the top of the list, but there’s also Scott Steiner, who is getting to be a bigger and bigger name as the weeks go by. Let’s get to it.

We open with a rather detailed recap of last week’s show.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Eli Drake with the Tag Team Title and the World Title Feast or Fired briefcase. Standing on the middle rope, Drake talks about all the dummies that he sees around the arena tonight. Why are they dummies? That’s because they’re booing one half of the World Tag Team Champions. He’s out here with the briefcase and now he wants to talk about becoming a two time World Champion.

Then Austin Aries and Pentagon Jr. want to come out here and talk about being champion, but that doesn’t matter because they’re not E-Li-Drake. Eli is cashing in his briefcase next week and Pentagon can take a one way trip on the Gravy Train while Drake takes the World Title back. Cue Pentagon for CERO MIEDO and trash talk ensues. Things don’t get physical and they both leave.

The announcers run down the card.

Earlier today, Kiera Hogan said she was ready to challenge Taya Valkyrie to a rematch. Tessa Blanchard came and laughed at her for thinking that any of it mattered. All that matters is Tessa and that’s not changing.

Grado is back (erg) and talks to Joseph Park about his (Grado’s) newest hot woman. Cue Austin Aries to mock them both and give Grado a banana.

OVE vs. KM/Fallah Bahh

KM runs Jake over to start as the announcers talk about an upcoming seminar in Pittsburgh later this month. Jake drives him into the wrong corner and it’s off to Dave for some choking. KM manages to suplex them both at the same time and it’s off to Fallah for a big man crossbody. Both Crists are down so Bahh rolls over the two of them in succession and then does it again for good measure. Jake pops up and superkicks Bahh down for a rollup and the pin at 3:43.

Rating: D+. So Bahh and KM are the newest oddball tag team, meaning you can probably pencil them in for a title run later in the year. Just by being a team they’re already in the top four (at worst) teams in the division and that’s a problem for this promotion. At this point, it might be a good idea to just drop the Tag Team Titles. You have two hours a week and that’s not enough to make those work very well, especially not with the low level of attention they put on the belts.

Moose promises to win the World Title this year. Jimmy Jacobs comes in and laughs the idea off so Moose chokes him. Jacobs issues a challenge for Moose to face Kongo Kong next week. Tell me they wouldn’t have him go over Moose too.

Taya Valkyrie vs. Kiera Hogan

Rematch from Redemption. Taya wastes no time in sending her face first into the buckle but misses a charge. Kiera knocks her to the floor but here’s Tessa to jump Hogan for the DQ at 2:43.

Tessa beats the heck out of Hogan post match.

Video on Brian Cage.

From World Series Wrestling in Australia.

Brian Cage vs. Brodie Marshall vs. Mick Moretti vs. Slex

It’s not mentioned but this is a Wrestle Circus Ringmaster Title match with Cage defending. At least Josh explains who the three people are and it’s a big brawl to start with Marshall being sent outside. Marshall crawls away from Moretti (sounds like an Ivory tribute) but it’s Cage coming back in with a running hurricanrana. Cage backdrops Marshall and it’s time for a pose down with the fall smaller Moretti.

Marshall takes an F5 and Slex hits Cage by mistake, meaning his days are numbered. Moretti’s F5 to Cage is no sold and he carries Moretti and Marshall at the same time for a double fall away slam. A big no hands flip dive takes all three down but Slex gets two off a springboard spinning kick to the face. Moretti hits a fisherman’s buster on Slex for two but Cage hits a buckle bomb to drop Slex. There’s a German suplex to Cage but he pops back up and hits the Drill Claw on Slex to retain at 7:57.

Rating: D+. This might as well have been Cage beating up three jobbers in the Impact Zone. The wrestlers were fine but I know as much about them as I do about any given local competitors, which is what TNA never understands: I need a reason to care about these people and at the same time, a reason to believe they’re a threat to Cage. That wasn’t the case here and that’s really annoying.

Drago/Aerostar/El Hijo Del Fantasma vs. Dezmond Xavier/DJZ/Andrew Everett

Lucha rules. Fantasma and Xavier (who has done nothing after winning the Super X Cup last year) start things off and it’s a standoff, allowing Aerostar to come in with a springboard hurricanrana. Things speed up in a hurry and the luchadors clear the ring without much effort. Everett scores with a springboard spinning kick to the face and let’s hit those upcoming date announcements because it’s not like there’s anything going on in the ring at the moment.

Fantasma chops Everett to slow things down and a kick to the face gives Drago two. Things speed up again as Everett goes to the floor and it’s off to Dezmond for a Backstabber. Everett and Dezmond try stereo Lionsaults from the same rope (cool) but only hit mat. It’s off to a four way submission until Aerostar breaks it up, likely due to the high levels of implausibility. Stereo Octopus Holds are broken up with stereo kicks to the face, followed by Xavier hitting a cartwheel into a moonsault onto the floor.

DJZ, with the horn, hits a dive of his own. Fantasma adds his suicide dive and Aerostar hits a springboard trust fall to take us to a break. Back with the luchadors down and the three Americans going to the top (same corner) for a trio of top rope splashes/dives for three near falls. Aerostar is back up with a springboard backsplash for two on DJZ, only to have Dezmond backflip kick Aerostar. Everett catches Aerostar on the top and the DZT is good for the pin at 16:32.

Rating: B-. It was fun, as most lucha matches are, but this went longer than it needed to go. These things don’t need to go very long as you get the idea in the first half. Why go longer and lose the impact that they can have later? And as a bonus, why are none of these people going after the X-Division Title? Could it be because there’s a certain group that goes after that title and these guys aren’t in it for whatever reason?

They do the big post match handshake. It wasn’t THAT good of a match.

Aries asks Drake about cashing in next week and wishes him luck. Not that it matters as he’s coming for the title no matter what. He knows he can beat Drake too.

We look at Ultimate X from Destination X 2012 with Zema Ion (DJZ) winning the title.

KM and Bahh argue with KM saying he can change Bahh’s life and make him cool. As they talk, we see someone else down in the back. The X symbol is seen again.

Last Friday, Eddie Edwards was released from jail when Tommy Dreamer came up and had him get in a car. Eddie: “Really?”

X-Division Title: Taiji Ishimori vs. Matt Sydal

Sydal is defending. They start slowly until Ishimori sends him to the floor for a teased springboard dive. Back from a break with Sydal grabbing an inverted Muta Lock, followed by a spinwheel kick. Double knees in the corner rock Sydal but he goes right back to the leg in a smart move.

The standing moonsault hits Ishimori’s legs but he has to roll through the 450. With that not working, the Tombstone into the double knees to the chest rock Sydal again. Not that it matters as he pops up and pulls Ishimori off the top for the front flip into the rollup to retain at 11:55.

Rating: C+. Nice match but I’m still not sure how interesting Sydal is as champion. The third eye and all that jazz doesn’t exactly thrill me and while his matches are good, they’re nothing all that great. Ishimori is a case of I’ve seen him a few times and I don’t need to see him again. He’s perfectly fine, but these ten minute matches aren’t going to let him showcase how good he can be.

Dreamer talks to Eddie about wasting so much time of his life trying to beat one person and says you can’t do this in 2018. You can however continue talking about ECW. It’s only been seventeen years.

Rosemary doesn’t want Allie at ringside with her tonight because that’s how it has to be.

LAX is panicking because they’ve lost everything, including the money and the girls. Maybe sell the clubhouse?

Su Yung vs. Rosemary

Yung tries to jump her on the floor and the fight starts on the outside with Yung being sent into the steps. The Panic Switch plants Rosemary on the floor and here come the army of demonic bridesmaids with a casket. There was no bell so no match.

Allie comes out for the save but the bridesmaids pull her away. Rosemary is back up and grabs the kendo stick to point at Yung. Su spits in her eyes and hits a Panic Switch off the stage through a table. Rosemary is put in the casket to end the show. Why do I have a feeling this is going to turn into Rosemary as Yung’s minion?

Overall Rating: C+. I liked this more than I was expecting to as it feels like they’re starting to turn things up a few notches. It’s nice to see them do something fresh and while they’re still doing some of the stories from before Redemption, at least they’re starting to go in some different directions with those stories. Better than what they’ve been doing lately and I can more than take that.


OVE b. Fallah Bahh/KM – Rollup to Bahh

Kiera Hogan b. Taya Valkyrie via DQ when Tessa Blanchard interfered

Brian Cage b. Brodie Marshall, Mick Moretti and Slex – Drill Claw to Slex

DJZ/Andrew Everett/Dezmond Xavier b. Aerostar/El Hijo Del Fantasma/Drago – DZT to Aerostar

Matt Sydal b. Taiji Ishimori – Front flip into a rollup

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