The SmarK Rant for Lucha Underground S01E18–“No Escape”

The SmarK Rant for Lucha Underground S01E18

“No Escape”

Your hosts are Matt Striker & Vampiro

Pentagon Jr. v. Argenis

Definitely a bigger step up the ladder for Pentagon compared to the jobbers he’s been destroying lately. Argenis kicks him in the head to block a monkey flip and reverses a backbreaker into a tornado DDT for two. Superkick puts Pentagon on the floor and he follows with a quebrada, and back in that gets two. They fight to the top and Argenis takes him down with a rana for two, but Pentagon has had enough and throws a high kick to put him down, then drops him on the top turnbuckle with a press slam. Argenis bails to the apron, so Pentagon clotheslines him to the floor and follows with a tope con hilo. Back in, he wraps him up with the package piledriver, and the ARMBAR OF DEATH finishes at 5:07. And again, poor Argenis suffers a broken arm as a result. Pentagon declares to his Master that he is ready and has zero fear. **1/2

Mientras Tanto, Catrina makes sure that Fenix is ready to bury Mil Muertes, and then vanishes like Batman.

Konnan and his pimp stick continue to work out in a warehouse that’s suffering from an extremely localized rainstorm for reasons never adequately explained.

Angelico v. Ivelisse

Vampiro would like to confirm the internet rumors about Ivelisse: Yes, in real life, she is a hottie. Son of Havoc, wearing his usual gear with a striped shirt underneath the vest, is your special referee for the match. The announcers suggest that their might be some inherent bias there. Ivelisse takes him down with a couple of wristlock throws and a rana to put him on the floor, then follows with a corkscrew dive from the top. Back in, Angelico dodges her on a charge, but he misses a knee after Havoc pulls her aside, and Vamp is like “The fix is in, brother!” Once again, I am shocked and appalled that someone would question the legitimacy of pro wrestling. They do a pinfall reversal that ends with Ivelisse in a very suggestive place, and Havoc isn’t cool with that. So Ivelisse throws chops in the corner while Angelico tries not to hit back, but finally he decides to throw a chop, and Havoc puts himself in the way. Angelico tries a delayed suplex, but she reverses into a guillotine, and he caresses her back to freak her out and make her break. Well, that’s unique. Finally he superkicks her and tries a Splash Mountain, but Havoc rescues Ivelisse from that and she gets a rana for two. She doesn’t want to be rescued and gives it to Havoc, but Angelico puts her down with a high kick and pins her at 6:20. As usual, this doesn’t help the relationship between Havoc and Ivelisse. Nothing to the match, but it’s a fun storyline. **

Mientras Tanto, Catrina appears in Mil’s mirror, and apparently next week is a COFFIN MATCH with Fenix to settle things. Well that’s right up his alley at least.

Cage match: Johnny Mundo v. King Cuerno

Just to be clear, Cage is not involved in this match, despite the name. Talk about bait and switch, though. They slug it out to start and Cuerno wins that battle, but Mundo springs off the cage with a kick for two. Cuerno rolls through to escape the low kick and they’re at a stalemate while Striker is already promising that this will be up there with Race/Flair and Snuka/Muraco as far as historic cage matches go. I’m gonna go with “No it won’t.” Cuerno dives off the cage for two and manages to hot shot Mundo onto the top of the cage and runs him into it as we get some cheese grater action. Cuerno tries to climb out, but Mundo catches him, only to have Cuerno clip the knee on the top rope and bring him down again. Cuerno charges and misses with a running knee, allowing Mundo to come back and hiptoss Cuerno into the cage. Shining Wizard gets two. He misses a dive off the cage, but puts Cuerno on his shoulders and runs him into the cage a few times before hitting a shooting star press for two. Johnny tries for the escape, but Cuerno hits him in the bad leg again and powerbombs him into the cage for two. Cuerno punts him out of the corner and tries an escape over the top, but Johnny grabs him by the mask and pulls him back in. They slug it out on the top and both guys just bump facefirst to the mat off that. Cuerno runs him into the cage, but Mundo fires back until walking into an elbow, then he comes back with a spear for two. Johnny goes up and they slug it out on the top rope again until Mundo hurls him to the mat and goes for the escape…but then changes his mind. He goes to the top of the cage, hits him with a corkscrew plancha instead, and gets the pin at 13:45 to end the feud. Hell of a main event. ****

Another really good show this week as they continue rolling along.