The SmarK Rant for WWF Monday Night RAW–01.25.93

The SmarK Legacy Rant for WWF Monday Night RAW – January 25 1993

– So we’re one night removed from Royal Rumble 93 with this one.

– PRE-RECORDED from New York. Wow, when would they EVER say that today?

– Your hosts are Vince McMahon & Rob Bartlett & Bobby Heenan.

Randy Savage v. Repo Man

Savage attacks to start and they brawl on the floor right away, with Savage dropping the knee out there before heading back in. He drops another knee off the second rope, but Repo tosses him, so Savage pops back in and sends him out with a high knee. Why is Savage so pissed off over a HAT? They brawl in the aisle and back into the ring again, with Repo getting the worst of it, and Savage chokes him out in the corner. Finally Repo runs him into the stairs to slow him down and adds a shot to the post. Back in, Repo chokes away in the corner and goes to a bodyscissors on the mat, and we take a break. Back with Repo dropping a leg for two. Funny bit as Rob Bartlett makes a reference so ridiculously obscure that even BOBBY HEENAN exclaims “What is he talking about?” Repo continues choking Savage down and adds a backdrop suplex for two, then into the chinlock as the commentary gets increasingly retarded. “It’s Paul Harvey!” “No, it’s Ronald McDonald.” What the HELL are these morons babbling about? Savage comes back with the slam and drops the big elbow at 8:52. Well that was quite the anti-climactic win, as Repo laid there for like a minute off a bodyslam. But Randy gets his hat back, that’s the important thing. **1/4

Kamala v. The Brooklyn Brawler

Now there’s an inside joke for you. Kamala is a babyface now and has Slick with him. Brawler was of course the secret identity of Kamala’s handler Kim Chee for years and years, so ha ha. Kamala wallops him and gets a buttdrop in the corner, then chokes away on the ropes and splashes him, but can’t figure out the pin. Superkick for Brawler and he tries another pin, but Brawler is still on his stomach. Finally Brawler lands on his back and Kamala splashes him again and rolls him over a few times before getting the pin at 3:30. This was not exactly the high point of either Kamala or Slick’s career. DUD Slick is awesome but as a babyface? No buys.

Career-ending match: Ric Flair v. Mr. Perfect

They exchange bitchslaps in the corner and Flair tries the headlock, but Perfect takes him down and smacks him out of the ring. Flair gets some advice from Bobby (which amounts to Heenan trying to steal the hammer from the timekeeper and smuggle it over to Flair) and Flair heads back in. Perfect starts on the arm with a hammerlock, but Perfect fires back with chops and we get the Flair Flop. Flair goes with the headlock and Perfect easily wrestles out of it, so Flair goes with the chops. Perfect fires back with his own and Flair backs off again. Finally Flair pokes the eye and tosses him, but the ref prevents a chair from being used. We take a break and return with Flair stomping away in the ring, and Perfect bumps to the floor. Back in, Perfect starts bleeding and Flair hammers on the cut, as Perfect takes a bump out of the corner. Flair tries some pins in the corner and chokes him out while arguing with the ref, but Perfect fights up and they slug it out. Perfect hits him with an Ax forearm and rolls him up for two, but Flair gets a cheapshot to take over again. Perfect with a backslide for two and he backdrops Flair out of the corner, then pounds on him in the other corner. Flair escapes with an atomic drop and rolls him up for two. Flair bails to the apron, but Perfect suplexes him back in for two. Flair catches him with a sleeper (“CHOKE HIM!”, says Bobby) but Perfect fights out and runs Flair into the top turnbuckle. Perfect comes back with his own sleeper, but Flair counters with a backdrop suplex. Figure-four, but the ref catches Flair using the ropes. Flair fires away with chops in the corner, but goes up and gets slammed off. And we take another break. Back with Flair finding an object in his kneepad and knocking Perfect out with it, and he drops an elbow for two, but luckily Perfect’s foot is in the ropes. Flair throws more chops in the corner, but Perfect absorbs it and gets pissed off enough to make the comeback. Forearm and backdrop put Flair down, and we get one last Flair Flip into a Perfect clothesline, for two. Flair desperately gets the pin in the corner, but the ref catches him using the ropes and Perfect is able to reverse for two. And now you’re gonna see a Perfectplex at 17:50, thus ending Flair’s WWF career. For the first time. Rob Bartlett had the good sense to stay quiet and let the professionals call this one. **** I always thought this one was longer, actually.

NEXT WEEK: Typhoon v. Doink the Clown! HOLY CRAP!