Impact Wrestling – May 8, 2015

Impact
Wrestling
Date: May 8, 2015
Location: Impact Zone,
Orlando, Florida
Commentator: Josh
Matthews
Reviewed by Tommy Hall
For the first time in
weeks, we actually have a special episode. This is airing live from
Orlando with the promise of a former World Champion returning in the
first five minutes. Other than that we have Kurt Angle defending the
World Title against Eric Young to probably blow off their feud.
Let’s get to it.

Eric Young is in the
ring to start and promises to win the title back tonight. This
brings out the returning World Champion and it’s Bully Ray, who will
referee Angle vs. Young. Eh cool but it’s nothing earth shattering.
It doesn’t help that it’s for Angle vs. Young which is just a
placeholder until Cater challenges Kurt.
We get the opening
recap video. They’re treating this like a huge show.
Here’s Ethan Carter to
talk about the democratic process which has lead us to a gentlemen’s
contest: arm wrestling. This brings out Mr. Anderson to show us the
results: falls count anywhere wins with 85% of the vote. Shocking
indeed.
Mr. Anderson vs.
Ethan Carter III
This is billed as falls
count anywhere but the rules make it sound hardcore. Anderson
quickly sends Carter and Tyrus to the floor but the big man gets in
some cheap shots. That’s fine with Anderson who sends Tyrus into the
post and chases after Carter as he tries to get away. We get the
first weapons brought in as Anderson pulls out a bunch of chairs to
pile up on the floor.
A Mic Check onto the
chairs doesn’t work so Carter backdrops Anderson onto the ramp for
two. Carter makes the mistake of spitting in Anderson’s face,
earning him a Regal Roll onto the chairs for two. Back in and
Anderson hammers away before planting Carter with a swinging
neckbreaker. Tyrus comes back in to earn his check with a t-bone
suplex and a corner splash. The spike to the throat puts Anderson
down for the pin at 5:39.
Rating: C-.
Well that was quick but they were smart to keep this quick given how
obvious the booking seems to be. Young is a guy who could bounce
right back after all these losses so why not feed him to Carter to
get us on the fast track to Angle vs. Carter? Everyone knows that’s
where it’s going so why not just keep this quick?
Bully
Ray likes the look of Angle’s World Title.
Gail
Kim goes up to Awesome Kong and asks if they’re on the same side
tonight. Kong walks away.
Quick
recap of BDC vs. the Rising.
Here’s
the BDC, wearing masks during their entrance, with something to say.
MVP holds up his mask and
says it belongs to Homicide, but he can’t be here tonight because
someone blindsided him on his way back here, sending him to the
hospital for surgery shoulder. Now he’s not saying the Rising did
it, but they must know something about it. MVP
goes on a rant about the American government taking foreign oil
fields and being cheered, but when the BDC tries to take something,
they’re called thugs. That’s a new word for something censored,
which was
probably a racial term given how MVP was going.
Cue
the Rising, who says they
fight in a ring instead of the streets. Think
about it though: a man called Homicide isn’t the most endearing
person in the world. The
Rising had nothing to do with the injury, but maybe it was someone
closer to home. Where was Kenny King last night for example? MVP
says he doesn’t care about wrestling. It’s all about the money and
power that comes with the job. Drew cares about workrate but MVP
cares about interest rate. Wasn’t
MVP the one who came to TNA to make things better for wrestling? MVP
wants a match right now so let’s do it live. The brawl is on and we
take a break.
MVP vs. Drew
Galloway
Joined in progress
after a break with MVP choking on the ropes and bending the arm
around the ropes. A slam off the middle rope gets two and they trade
big boots with Drew’s knocking MVP outside. Drew follows him and
gets slammed head first into the barricade for a loud thud. Back in
and the Playmaker is countered into the Futureshock to give Drew the
pin at 4:45.
Rating: D+.
The match was watchable but this is one of the least interesting
feuds I can remember in a long time. They’re doing the right things,
but there’s just nothing to make me care. The (maybe) racist part
could be interesting and feels like Corgan’s first story addition.
It’s not likely to make me care about the feud, but the wrestling and
promos have been fine. I just don’t care.
Post match Eric Young
(in CRAZY pink) comes in and helps the BDC beat down the Rising with
a chair. Despite Young being an associate of the team when it
formed, this is treated as a surprising turn of events.
James Storm is here
with a present for a special friend. They should just call him
Christmas because he’s always giving.
The preview for next
week is all about Kurt Angle and asks who’s next. I know that’s a
Destination America ad but it’s almost guaranteeing that Angle
retains tonight.
Here’s James Storm with
his present. He can talk about being tough and drinking beer, but
it’s time to give someone else the spotlight. This brings out Mickie
James to a very nice ovation, but Storm wants to talk about her being
a mother. Everyone should love their mother, but Storm quickly
switches over to Mickie’s music career. She’s an amazing mother,
wrestler and singer, but she’s also a great friend. He holds up the
box and it’s a new guitar. Storm tries to sing a bit but Mickie
politely shakes her head no.
They take a picture
together (not a selfie Storm) and here’s Magnus with a forced smile.
Storm has a gift for him too: the spiked helmet from the Brutus
Magnus days. Magnus and Mickie leave but Storm pulls out a blanket
for their son Donovan. That’s too much for Magnus, who comes back in
and breaks the guitar over Storm’s head. Like a truly creepy man,
Storm starts smiling. They are NAILING this story and Storm is
making it awesome. How can he be the same guy that led the worthless
Revolution?
Eric Young wants the
BDC to have his back to deal with Bully Ray tonight.
We go backstage at
Robert Irvine Live (Gail Kim’s real life husband and a celebrity
chef) where Taryn Terrell shows up. Gail gets in her face and that’s
about it.
Gail Kim/Awesome
Kong vs. Dollhouse
Jade jumps Gail to
start but gets thrown down by a hurricanrana, so it’s off to Marti
vs. Kong. Everyone but Taryn comes in and the Doll House is thrown
into the same corner and splashed by the monster. We settle down to
Marti hitting a running faceplant on Gail, setting up a cannonball
from Jade for two.
Marti slams her down
for two but it’s off to Jade, who is very slowly slammed down onto
Gail’s knees. Kim’s Black Widow is broken up by Taryn but Gail dives
over for the hot tag. The Dollhouse has to save their boss from an
Implant Buster and everything breaks down. Jade takes an Implant
Buster but Taryn counters the Eat Defeat on Marti with a rollup for
the pin at 5:32.
Rating: C.
This was fine and the right ending as I’m still loving Taryn and the
Dollhouse as a whole. They’re setting up the big blowoff with Gail
vs. Taryn, but I’m hoping we don’t get another Gail title reign.
We’ve been there time after time and I don’t see what else she can do
with the title.
We
look at Jeff Hardy breaking his leg and see Matt holding both Tag
Team Titles.
Magnus asks Mickie to
have nothing to do with James Storm anymore. Mickie isn’t thrilled
and leaves.
Here’s Matt Hardy to
address the Tag Team Title situation. Jeff is going to be healing
for a long time, so as of right now, the titles are vacant. That
means it’s time for Matt to go home and figure out what’s next for
him.
As he leaves, here are
Bobby Roode and Austin Aries with something to say. Aries hasn’t
forgotten Young putting him on a stretcher to send him out of the
Impact Zone on a stretcher. That brings Aries to another piece of
gold: the World Tag Team Titles, which seem to have a curse on them.
Yeah they’re constantly being vacated, but that sounds like an
opportunity. He and Roode have held the Tag Team Titles and didn’t
get hurt, so Roode thinks the titles should be defended by two of the
best wrestlers in the world today.
This brings out Davey
Richards, who says no one has fought more battles for those belts
than the Wolves. Aries likes the idea, but there’s no team in front
of him. Not quite says Davey, because Eddie Edwards is back. Eddie
has been cleared to wrestle and who better to start against than
Roode and Aries? That’s fine with them, but Eddie wants to one up
it: a best of five series. Hands are shaken and the series is on.
After a break, Matt
Hardy goes to leave but Drew Galloway stops him to offer him some
food for thought: things are changing a lot and he could use a good
man.
Angelina Love is in the
ring to talk about being asked everything going on lately. However,
she just wants to talk about herself because she’s the only Beautiful
Person around and the best Knockout ever. Cue Velvet Sky because
these two are cursed to be around each other for all eternity.
Velvet looks…..sleepy. Anyway, Angelina sucks up to her but
Velvet, now with pink/purple highlights and a left arm tattoo sleeve
doesn’t say anything. Instead it’s a spear to start a catfight as
the fans are going mild. Security breaks it up.
Recap of Young beating
Angle in a stretcher match last week.
Young asks Ray if he’s
going to be the next one to stab him in the back. Ray says he’s just
here to referee.
TNA World Title:
Kurt Angle vs. Eric Young
Bully Ray is refereeing
and Angle is defending. Josh on Angle: “If anything ever happened
to Captain America, Kurt Angle could easily be an Avenger.” A
quick belly to belly puts Young down but he fires off some elbows in
the corner to take over. Eric is sent to the apron so he runs to the
top, only to have Kurt run the ropes and superplex him down. The BDC
is watching from the stage as we take a break.
Back with Young getting
two off a neckbreaker and choking in the corner. The chinlock slows
Angle down for a bit before Angle fights up and wins a slugout. Now
we hit the rolling Germans before the ankle lock sends Eric to the
ropes. Kurt won’t let go so Eric rolls Angle out to the floor. A
CRAZY low blow puts Ray down and the BDC starts triple teaming Angle.
This brings out Chris
Melendez and the Rising to help Angle before fighting to the back.
Young loads up a piledriver on Ray but gets backdropped down, setting
up the Angle Slam for two on Eric. Why there hasn’t been a DQ called
yet isn’t clear. Eric hits a quick piledriver for two but goes up
for a cross body, only to have Angle roll through into the ankle lock
to retain at 14:33.
Rating: C.
The match was ok but the most obvious ending ever and an unnecessary
brawl in the middle didn’t do it any favors. Now hopefully we can
get away from the Young vs. Angle story and get on to Carter taking
the title at Slammiversary because I never want to see Eric get
another title shot.
Angle
poses on the stage for a long time and no one attacks him to end the
show.
Overall Rating: C.
Good enough show this week but it’s really nothing memorable. Ray
coming back is cool, but they would have been better off by not
announcing it as a former World Champion as Dixie’s clues made it a
pretty obvious reveal. The Sky return was the same obvious swerve,
which doesn’t leave a lot going on here. This was basically a
preview for what they have coming, which is fine as it’s the start of
a new cycle, but there wasn’t much to see here.
Results
Ethan Carter III b. Mr.
Anderson – Pin after a spike to the throat from Tyrus
Drew Galloway b. MVP –
Futureshock
Dollhouse b. Gail
Kim/Awesome Kong – Rollup to Kim
Kurt Angle b. Eric
Young – Ankle lock
Remember to check out my website at kbwrestlingreviews.com and head over to my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:
http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

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