The PG Era Rant: Raw, 10.20.14

The PG Era Rant for Raw, October 20,
On tonight’s show:
  • John Cena and Dean Ambrose face
    the Authority in a Handicap Street Fight.
  • AJ/Paige and Usos/Dusts have been
    added to Hell in a Cell, giving us 8 matches on the night.
  • Six-man rematch: Usos/Sheamus v.
Live from Kansas City, MO.
Your hosts are as always.
We look back at last week’s main event

And our first speakers are the
Authority. Lilian Garcia has taken over for Justin Roberts. I
wonder what that banner is curled up behind them. HHH leads off,
saying he will be proud of the Authority after they face off against
Cena and Ambrose. And then on Sunday, Cena and Ambrose go to Hell.
In a Cell. Unspeakable things will happen on Sunday! 9.99!
HHH makes clear that Hell in a Cell is
not a match you win – even if HHH is the winningest person in it –
but it’s a match you survive. HHH promises that both rivalries will
END on Sunday. The rivalries, of course, being Orton/Cena and
Rollins bats second, saying he’s happy
to be called Mr. Money in the Bank, but (Crowd: YOU SOLD OUT.) he’d
prefer Undisputed Future of the WWE. He thinks it has a great ring
to it. The key is future, which Ambrose will not have after the main
event on Sunday…
…but Orton steps in, saying he’s the
main event because he and Cena have had slightly more than a cup of
coffee in WWE. HHH has to step in: it’s a double main event, so
you’re both right. But Cena and Orton has one more stipulation: it’s
a #1 Contender’s Match for the WWE Championship. Orton likes it.
Orton goes cheap heat on the Royals before promising he will beat
Cena, then Lesnar.
HHH knows the Authority will make him
proud tonight and on Sunday. The Authority always wins, and that’s
best for business. Kane sets off pyro, and we’re out.
We look back at the shenanigans on Main
Event with Sheamus, Sandow, and Miz.
Okay, that banner is probably the
curled-up Russian flag. Anyway, it’s good to know they talked Brock
into getting off his ranch and doing his day job for Survivor Series.
At least, I hope it’s Survivor Series.
Sheamus & Jey Uso & Jimmy
Uso v. Miz & Goldust & Stardust.

Inset promos from both the Usos and the Dusts talk about Sunday’s
match (although they almost start the Dust one during the Uso
entrance – why is Kevin Dunn employed again?). HASHTAG! Actually,
wait, Sandow is going to take Miz’s place. Jimmy and Stardust start,
and Jimmy with an uppercut and slam as Miz goes to commentary.
Senton gets two by Jimmy. Jey in with his flying forearm, and a
snapmare gets one. Stardust cuts Jey off, but Goldust gets
hip-tossed for one. Goldust rushes the corner, and Stardust returns
with the Disaster Kick for two. Goldust tags in and taunts Jey as we
go to break.
#6ManTag, part two.
Goldust with a spinebuster to Jey for two as we return. Stardust
in, and he chokes Jey with his shin. Sandow tags himself in, getting
a headbutt and the Million Dollar Neckbreaker for two. Sandow with a
charge that eats boot, but Stardust stops a hot tag. Goldust in, and
he slugs Jey out on his feet. Jey wins a slugfest, but Goldust with
a kneeling uppercut only to get hit with a Dragon Whip. Hot tag
Sheamus, and Sandow gets the worst of it. Kneelift and Stardust is
sent packing, and this leads to a Ten of Clubs attempt, but Goldust
distracts and Sandow tries to take over. Sheamus with a powerslam
for two, Goldust saves. Goldust slams Jimmy, but Jey with a
superkick and he dives on Goldust. Stardust with a blind dive to the
Usos, and Sheamus dumps Sandow and bowls everyone over. Sandow’s
tossed back in, and the Brogue is warmed up. Stardust misses the
Disaster Kick, and Sheamus Brogue Kicks him. Sandow cradles Sheamus
for the pin at 9:42. Miz acts like HE won. **
I’m not
entirely certain about that rating because they kept cutting to Miz
at commentary rather than show the match. Thanks, Kev.
Orton wants to talk to HHH. He thanks HHH for the chance on Sunday
and promises to win. HHH doesn’t doubt and admits it’s been a long
time coming… but the whole thing was Seth’s idea, not HHH. Orton
can’t comprehend that, but he needs to thank Seth personally.
Wyatt Family is going their separate ways, and somehow this is even
scarier, because Bray Wyatt has Sister Abigail as his prophet. It’s
If you have
DVR, look back at Bray in that video. He’s wearing a jacket that
people in NXT should find very familiar.
Non-Title: AJ Lee v. Alicia Fox.
Paige is at ringside. We view the highlights of SmackDown before
the match. Fox knocks over AJ, but gets caught with a back elbow.
Cradle gets one. Another cradle gets two. AJ skips while holding
Fox’s hair, and a spin kick (allegedly) gets two. Fox knocks down AJ
for two. Fox sends AJ into the corner, and a Northern Lights Suplex
gets two. To the chinlock, using the hair to control AJ. She slams
her face-first into the map and kicks her around, then a tilt-a-whirl
gets two. Fox (screaming at AJ): “I HATE YOU!” Double handed
chinlock by Fox, and she throws AJ into the corner to get a boot
choke. She stops to yell at the ref, so AJ kicks her down and gets a
Thesz Press. Corner clothesline and Rude Awakening follow, then a
head-scissors as Fox bails. Paige tries to fire Fox up, throwing her
back in and distracting AJ. It works, as Fox gets the cradle for the
pin at 4:15. 1/2*
Seth Rollins is admiring his contract backstage when Orton thanks him
for the idea. But why would Rollins DO that? While Orton
appreciates it, he asks Rollins to step aside and let him handle it
himself. Rollins makes it clear: if somehow Orton moves on to beat
Brock Lesnar, he’d be the Champion… oh, and then the briefcase is a
target on Orton.
like the mutual loathing Rollins and Orton have going. I don’t like
how there’s no likeable human being in the Divas’ Division outside of
Brie Bella, and I’m not allowed to like her because she’s not a
Hogan is on WWE Backstage Pass, exclusively on the WWE Universe
Orton is out again. He reminds us this isn’t even their first Hell
in a Cell match. But time flies quickly – their debuts were all of
12 years ago, but even then Orton was the bigger deal. (The crowd
chants for the Royals, so Orton reminds them that he thinks the
Royals will lose the World Series.) Ever since then, they’ve become
the Hogan/Piper or Bret/Shawn of their time. Sure, Orton respects
Cena, but he’s still just a punk from Boston going against wrestling
royalty Take your creed and shove it up your ass because Orton
doesn’t care about anything but himself. That’s why Orton won at the
Royal Rumble the last time they met, and he’ll win Sunday. Orton
will savor every second of beating Cena. And after that…
before we go any further, here’s Cena. (He hangs out with fans
wearing Royals gear at ringside just for fun.) Cena: “Shut up.
Shut up. Shut your mouth!” Everyone respects Orton’s skills and
his status as a future Hall of Famer, but every time he talks, he
proves his own stupidity. Stop talking about the past like a
grandpa. That was then, this is now – and with all Kansas City is
getting right now (applause break), you come here to insult the
baseball team? That was then (and the last time Orton was relevant),
and this is now. The Royals are in the World Series.
Orton reminds people that getting there is one thing, winning is
another. Cena says the idiot has a point – getting to Hell in a
Cell is one thing, winning is something Orton can’t do. Cena may
have wanted Rollins, but no more, because a win means he gets Brock
Lesnar one more time. Sure the structure is Hell, but there won’t be
another chapter on Sunday. Orton will be locked in a Cell with him –
and Cena sees Brock Lesnar when he looks at Orton. And Hell is
coming with Cena.
ladies and gentlemen, his name is Paul Heyman. He’s not into the
revisionist history and how laughable it is – the best of the Class
of 2002 was neither of them. It was Brock Lesnar. So think about it
(like Heyman does, all the time), the current WWE Champion Brock
Lesnar was champion then, too. Sure, this Sunday… (Heyman pauses
to see the Cell) …on Sunday, Cena and Orton will be in the Cell to
win for the Championship Of Each Other. They have an equal as their
opponent. But they are not Brock’s equal because Brock has no equal.
The winner will lose in the long run, because they face a Beast.
Orton wants that title back, but he should want no part of Brock.
Heyman then cuts Cena off from leaving – Cena wants all of Brock
Lesnar. Which isn’t sound thinking, because if – IF – Cena gets
past Randy Orton, he will have to face Brock Lesnar and get killed
one more time.
Cena gives Heyman the AA… or threatens to, then thinks better of it
as Heyman screams for mercy. And it’s an RKO out of nowhere! Orton:
“Who’s stupid now?” Heyman laughs at Cena. “Wrong place,
wrong time.” So Orton RKOs Heyman for good measure. “Who’s the
dumbass now?”
look back at this week in Big Show vs. Rusev.
have enjoyed Orton’s heel work a lot more if it wasn’t patently
obvious Cena’s winning on Sunday. Orton has been treading water for
so long thanks to Evolution and Rollins, he’s a lame duck. And it’s
too bad.
Rusev v. Big E.
Lockup goes nowhere. A second try is a clean break. Round Three
allows Rusev to kick and attack in consecutive corners. Big E fights
out, getting the running Vader attack to send Rusev out of the ring.
Big E follows, and after some reversals, Rusev eats barricade. Back
in, Big E gets a kneelift and works Rusev over in the corner. Rusev
headbutts away to take over, smashing Big E in the back. A front
chancery follows, switching to a side chinlock. Big E fights off,
but Rusev knocks him over out of the ropes and stomps away. An
awkward criss-cross ends with Rusev getting a spin kick to Big E as
we go to break.
sure I understand why this isn’t a squash.
Rusev/Langston, part two.
Rusev gets snapmared, and Big E gets a Greco-Roman suplex. He
charges into a superkick, though. And the Accolade ends it at 7:22,
half of which was commercial. Call it *1/4
for what we saw. Lana then says Big Show will fail on Sunday because
he’s a circus freak instead of a hero. Rusev promises to eat Big
Show’s heart. The people will despise Big Show when he loses. Lana
then asks everyone to rise for the Russian colors… only they don’t
come down.
Show appears on the Tron… and then reveals he’s replaced the
Russian flag with the American flag! Play some “Stars and Stripes
Forever”! But Rusev remembers what Big Show did and decides to rip
the US flag down… only for a “soldier” to enter in protest.
Rusev kicks the soldier’s head off and walks away.
Ago, because a stupid idea that amuses Vince and Dunn must be
now Big Show’s in the ring, with all the flags still present. He’s
so emotional he can barely speak. So we get a USA chant to fill
time. He says that Rusev has crossed the line by attacking the
soldier. Now he has Big Show’s attention. Don’t get in his head;
it’s a dark place. And now Big Show will unleash the wrath on
Rusev’s head. The American Giant will end Rusev’s 15 minutes of
starts to leave, but he has one more thing to add – screw Sunday,
let’s do this now! He keeps yelling for Rusev…
Rusev doesn’t show. Show: “Fine. You won’t come to me? I’ll come
to you.” And now the pursuit is on. (Cole finally addresses the
elephant in the room: no one should’ve rushed the ring in the first
Show is headed for Rusev’s dressing room. He kicks the door down,
and finds it abandoned
Dean Ambrose is watching See No Evil 2 and munching on popcorn. It’s
research for their match. Cena arrives and is not amused. Ambrose
points out the Superman/Batman dynamic between the two. “But
really, we just don’t mix.” Cena tries for a reality check:
they’re in a match with three people who want to put them on the
shelf. Ambrose says he enjoys street fights, and his plan is to take
as many people down as possible. Just fight. Cena can dig it –
but Ambrose is totally more Joker than Batman. Ambrose: “Why so
Superman/Batman dynamic explains why the youths cheer for Cena and
the young adults cheer Ambrose. Me? I’ll enjoy the show. Oh, and
to put a bow on this crap – someone rushed the ring on Rusev. He
is totally within his right to defend himself. And yeah, I know it
was a plant. It still sends the wrong message.
McMahon got an Eisenhower Fellowship. Whatever that is.
Brie Bella v. Summer Rae.
Summer with a kneelift and she sends Brie into the corner. She
shoves Brie down for one. Crucifix by Brie gets two. Brie with YES
kicks to the leg, then more in the corner. Nikki watches as Summer
gets a high spinning kick for two. Summer goes for the Cobra Clutch,
which is sold like a resthold. Summer uses the hair to keep control,
getting one. Back to the Cobra Clutch. Brie snapmares out of it,
and they do the double hairpull slam. Brie with forearms and a
dropkick to take control, and the running knee connects. Brie Mode
missile dropkick misses, and Summer gets two. Summer stomps away,
but Brie reverses a whip and gets the missile dropkick on the second
try. Facebuster gets the pin at 3:40. 3/4*
Take: Honestly, Brie is messing up a lot less than AJ lately. I
don’t know what’s going on with AJ, who has shown she can have a
fantastic match, but she’s looked off her game lately. Combine this
with Paige’s stage fright, and I wouldn’t be surprised if the Bellas
match is better than AJ and Paige. It’s not odds-on, but it’s not a
long shot either.
Ambrose has a huge duffel bag with him as he heads to the ring. He
looks up at the Cell before speaking. He says he’s dreamed about
what he will do to Seth Rollins, and it will happen on Sunday. He
gets that “Power Ranger Suit Sellout” inside the Cell where no
one will stop him. He opens the duffel bag to reveal a Seth Rollins
CPR dummy. He addresses the dummy, calling him a puppet for the
Authority for a pat on the back and a paycheck. But dirty isn’t
right, because Seth doesn’t get his hands dirty. But Ambrose does
still care, so he’ll start by ripping Seth’s hands off (which he
demonstrates). That way Seth will never getting his hands dirty
again. Ambrose slaps “Seth” with his own arm. Seth should know
what Ambrose does – he screws other people back harder as he drives
a screwdriver into “Seth”’s nose. He then smacks the dummy with
a hammer. He then says he “saw” himself chopping off Seth’s
testicles… but Seth’s testicles are Authority property, so instead
he’ll jam the hot dog tongs back into the sensitive area. (“You
don’t need to have kids anyway.”) And then the dummy gets a
now the real Seth Rollins appears, flanked Joey Mercury and Jamie
Noble. Seth says he’s finally found an opponent Ambrose can relate
to. We all know Dean can’t beat Rollins, but at least he can parlay
this into stand-up comedy. What’s next, a watermelon? Balloon
animals? (Ambrose throws the detached arm at Rollins.) Rollins
admits to selling out, and he hates hearing it from fellow
Mid-westerners. But that’s where similarities end. He knew he was
more than trailer-park trash. Rollins says no one can relate to him
because he is a SOMEBODY. That’s why people are taking pictures of
him while calling him a sellout, saying it’s the best part of Raw.
So what if he sold out?
though, has an electric drill and tells Rollins to be quiet or get a
preview. Rollins doesn’t sweat Ambrose. He’s not worried. The Cell
means nothing…
before we go any further, here’s Mick Foley! Mick said he wanted to
visit an old friend (meaning the Cell). He wants to congratulate
both for fulfilling their destinies, since he remembers the TLC match
back in 2012 that stole the show. The bar is high, and he watches
WWE TV all the time (including the Network). And yes, the Shield
were great as a team… but he thinks it’ll be better as opponents.
finds Ambrose “disturbingly poetic”, but in every scenario he
thinks of, he sees Rollins winning. Rollins: “Now we’re talking!”
Just when Foley seemed like a dinosaur who mocks wrestling, he still
has some brains left. But Foley said ALMOST any scenario – the
Cell is slightly different. Foley knows Ambrose can rip Rollins’s
face off. And yeah, Foley has worn Santa attire all year because he
believes in his last vestiges of innocence that he didn’t lose in
Pittsburgh. He’s proud of the Hell he went through then. But as a
veteran of the Cell, he knows those scars will be there – emotional
scars that won’t heal.
says thanks, but… he has no innocence and more scars don’t bother
him. He doesn’t care what he loses, and he knows no one else
understands him. He thinks Foley just might. He’s ready for Hell in
a Cell – will it be worth it, Seth? ASK YOURSELF!
declares them both crazy, but if they think crazy matters on Sunday,
they’ve lost it. It’s not about crazy (and Ambrose is out of his
damn mind). Rollins will beat Ambrose the same way he always does –
through superior intellect. His mind is way above Ambrose’s. It’s
not about crazy, it’s about smart.
then reminds Rollins that brains mean nothing when you’re thrown off
a Cell. The Cell defines Foley, and it will define both of them. He
doesn’t think they’re ready for life on the other side. Tomorrow,
the Kansas City people (cheap pop) will get the game they’ve been
waiting for all their lives. On Sunday, that’s what Ambrose and
Rollins get too. Have a nice day. Ambrose is excited, but Rollins
is hesitant – more so when Ambrose goes to swing a chair at him.
Ambrose throws the dummy at Rollins and the stooges. They sell it.
The bit of Ambrose attacking the dummy probably looked like it
could’ve worked on paper, but in practice came off flat. Foley saved
the segment and provided the contrast needed: Ambrose is more
mentally prepared than Rollins… but that doesn’t say much.
Cesaro v. Dolph Ziggler.
Wait, what? Now? Isn’t this a match for Sunday? HASHTAG! JBL
gives his condolences to Ox Baker’s family. A tie-up goes nowhere.
Both try for some amateur wrestling, leading to a Cesaro headlock.
Cesaro knocks over Dolph and drops on him for one. Another headlock,
but Cesaro blocks a hiptoss and slugs out Dolph. Dolph falls out the
back of a powerslam and dropkicks Cesaro, who bails before the giant
elbow. Cesaro gains control only to be sent to the floor. Dolph
follows, sending Cesaro to the barricade. Back in, Dolph with a
sunset flip for two. Cesaro gets a Stun Gun on Dolph to take control
as we go to break.
Nope, that match isn’t official yet.
Cesaro/Ziggler, part two.
Cesaro has Dolph ties up but Dolph elbows out. Dolph ties a sunset
flip, but Cesaro pics him up and does a clean-and-jerk gutbuster for
two. He walks the middle rope for a double axhandle, then a second
rope elbowdrop gets two. Back to a Cobra Clutch. Cesaro sends Dolph
into the corner, getting a Hotshot out of it, but he leaps off the
top into a dropkick. Dolph begins the comeback, getting the Stinger
Splash and Rude Awakening. Giant elbow gets two. Rocker Dropper
try, but after some reversals it’s Dolph with a cradle for two.
Cesaro tries the Ricola Bomb, but Dolph gets the Kidman counter for
two. Dolph with an uppercut, but the leaping DDT is caught. Kicks
are missed, and Cesaro with an uppercut for the pin at 9:31. That
was abrupt. **
Cesaro adds a Neutralizer while calling for the belt.
and Rollins are arguing when HHH stops them. He names Kane the
captain of the team, since neither Orton nor Rollins can trust the
other. Kane yells them to attention, and says they have to begin the
process tonight, so PUT ASIDE YOUR DIFFERENCES already. It’s time to
give a taste of Hell. Orton and Rollins still don’t trust each
other, but they fall in line.
needs to be a great main event. This show so far has been mediocre.
It’s felt off.
in a Cell Kickoff will have Damien Sandow interviewing the Miz, while
Paul Heyman will join the panel.
in a Cell gets the Royal Rumble “By The Numbers” treatment.
same Wyatt Family video as before.
didn’t say it then, but before the main event’s as good a place as
any: I think it’s a very good sign that Cena/Orton got the 9:00 slot
and Ambrose/Rollins got the 10:00 slot.
Main Event, no DQ: John Cena and
Dean Ambrose v. The Authority.

HASHTAG! It’s a brawl to start, with Ambrose going after Rollins
and leaving Cena to fend off the other two. Kane bails and Orton is
tossed, so Ambrose and Rollins start. Ambrose reverses a whip and
gets a forearm and bulldog combo. Ambrose with the Bret Hart
wishbone stomp and a bow-and-arrow hair pull. Ambrose with a Hammer
Throw next, following up with a clothesline. He clears the apron
before dumping Rollins and following. He clears the announce table,
but the partners jump in to stop whatever happens next. Ambrose
elbowdrops the mob. Ambrose introduces a chair to the match and
throws Rollins in. He uses the chair liberally on Rollins across the
back. Ambrose enters a trance before ducking outside and looking for
more weaponry. He finds a table, but Kane throws Ambrose on it,
denting it. Kane sends Cena into the steps as we go to break.
is this match being held under tag rules? It’s a street fight!
#StreetFight, part two.
Rollins hooks the nose of Ambrose and drops an elbow. He adds a
neck crank for good measure. Ambrose bites the hand to break, so
Rollins stomps away. Orton tags in, dropping Ambrose on the top
rope. He rakes the face with his knee pad and brings Rollins back
in. Rollins punches Ambrose down and looks at the Cell before adding
back elbows. He taunts Cena, so Ambrose tries to fight out but gets
nowhere. Orton helps Rollins work Ambrose over in the corner. He
tags in (“Same team”) and stomps Ambrose’s foot. Cover gets one.
Orton follows Ambrose crawling to Cena, then begins the Garvin Stomp
to stop it. It gets two. Ambrose fights back with some boxing jabs,
but Orton goes low. Blind charge eats boot and Ambrose goes up with
a missile dropkick. Hot tag Cena, and he goes to comeback town on
Rollins. Five Knuckle Shuffle (as Orton can’t see Cena), and an AA
to Kane. Cena finds another table and brings it in (since the first
one broke). He has Rollins stuck with the corner empty, and it’s AA
time, but Rollins avoids the table and sends Cena into a wedged chair
in the corner. Orton works on Ambrose on the outside, sending him
into the steps. Kane picks up the stairs, and Orton sends Ambrose
into them. Rollins has Cena down and puts the table up in the
corner. But Cena gets up and goes for an AA only to be reversed to a
Shiranui for two. Kane drags Cena outside the ring and throws him
into Michael Cole. Cole got out of the way. Kane then sends Cena
into the steps as Cole and JBL try to get mic’d up again. Cena eats
post on the outside, and back in, Kane sends Cena through the table.
Kane drags Cena out of the rubble, but instead of covering, he kicks
Ambrose away. Kane demands the Cell be lowered, and it is – with
Ambrose stuck outside and Cena in it! Kane uppercuts Cena and tags
in Orton as Ambrose barely sneaks in under the lowering Cell and gets
the hot tag. He dives onto all three men and tosses Rollins and Kane
before working on Orton. Dropkick to Rollins sends him into the
Cell, and Ambrose with the rope-tangle clothesline on Orton. Ambrose
has kendo sticks now, and he goes to town on Orton. White Russian
legsweep follows, and Ambrose gets a chair. He goes to the top rope
with it, and it’s a chair-aided elbowdrop to Orton. Kane returns and
tries a goozle, but Ambrose has a chair and uses it. Orton is
dumped, and Rollins is tossed onto Orton. And Ambrose dives into
Rollins and the Cell, knocking everyone out. Orton is up first and
tosses Ambrose into the post. He’s ready for the RKO, but Cena
catches him for an AA. Orton escapes, and Kane chokeslams Cena.
Dirty Deeds to Kane, and Orton gets the RKO for the pin at 18:31.
And right after the match, Rollins gives Orton the Curbstomp. “I
call the shots around here!” Rollins is the only one standing –
on top of the Cell, even – as we go off the air. ***1/4
last week, this show seemed a mess. It was like the show was
re-written at the last minute… which, knowing Vince, it probably
was. Other than that, a typical go-home show.
  1. Sheamus
    beats the Miz to retain the US Title.
  2. Rusev
    beats Big Show by TKO.
  3. In
    the Cell, John Cena defeats Randy Orton.
  4. In
    an added match, Dolph Ziggler defeats Cesaro to retain the
    Intercontinental Title.
  5. AJ
    Lee pins Paige to retain the Divas’ Title.
  6. Goldust
    and Stardust beat the Usos.
  7. Nikki
    Bella beats Brie Bella with aid from Stephanie.
  8. In
    the Cell, Dean Ambrose beats Seth Rollins when Randy Orton turns
TIME: 53:01 over six matches
MATCH: The main event
MVP: Seth Rollins
SCORE: Meh, 4/10.
check the calendar: Matt Perri reviews Main Event on Tuesday. Tommy
Hall does the other shows the rest of the week. Stranger in the Alps
will run the daily discussion. Brian Bayless will run the e-fed.
Danielle Stolman will be tortured with Total Divas. And I’ll be back
in seven days, if not sooner.
be on the Network.