The SmarK Rant for WCW Monday Nitro – 12.04.95 Live from Phoenix, AZ Your hosts are Eric Bischoff, Bobby Heenan and Mongo. WCW World tag title: Harlem Heat v. The American Males Stevie beats the ugly off of Riggs in the corner to start, but a pair of dropkicks get two. Stevie puts him down with a sideslam, but Riggs hits Booker with a forearm and the Males clean house. Bagwell with a sunset flip on Booker for two and the Males trap him in the corner while Col. Parker stops by to woo Sherri. We deal with that silliness while Booker gets a sidekick on Riggs for two, and Sherri decides to leave with Parker. The Heat don’t seem to notice the loss of their manager and continue beating on Riggs for a silent crowd. Booker with a nice spinning Black Dynamite style kung fu kick for two, and the Heat get a double gourdbuster while Booker yells at someone who is presumably a famous football person. Yay sports! Hot tag Bagwell and he’s the whorehouse of fire! Pervertplex on Stevie, but Riggs occupies the ref and the Harlem Hangover finishes Bagwell at 7:48. Dull but inoffensive. ** Sting and Lex Luger are out to reinforce their bonds of friendship, and although Sting doesn’t support Luger’s lifestyle choice (Jimmy Hart) he still supports him as a friend. But he’s not gonna cut him a break in the title match at Starrcade. Lex is cool with that. This was a really cool dynamic that you just didn’t see in wrestling before, with Luger acting as a heel but still being friends with the #1 babyface because they were actually separating the business and personal relationships. Sting v. Kurasawa Sting puts him on the floor and they have a quick brawl, but Kurasawa starts working on the arm in the ring. Sting fights back with the Stinger splash and finishes with the Scorpion at 2:35. Pretty much a squash. * Scott Norton v. The Giant Giant unleashes the clubbing forearms and slams Norton, but falls prey to an atomic drop. That was pretty impressive. Norton slugs away as Giant’s selling problems are exposed here. Norton goes up for something, but lands in a chokeslam at 2:40. *1/2 Ric Flair, joined by Charles Barkley, is out for an interview. Nothing much here. WCW World title: Randy Savage v. Lex Luger Savage goes on the offensive and chokes away in the corner to start, but Luger takes over with a cheapshot until Savage elbows him down for two. Savage goes to work on the arm and we take a break and return with Savage working on the arm after running it into the railing outside, and back in for a keylock. Luger makes the ropes and Savage gets a small package for two and goes to a hammerlock. To the floor and he sends Luger into the post, but misses a dive and hits the railing. I feel like we were ripped off from seeing a Savage-Pillman match in WCW where they take turns diving into the railing face-first. Back in, Savage is blinded and swinging wildly, allowing Luger to put him down with a clothesline for two. Luger drops elbows for two and follows with a kneelift as Bischoff clarifies that we’re watching wrestling and not “people talking about wrestling”. Ironically that’s what would beat WCW. The WWF couldn’t beat them at the wrestling, but they sure as shit did the gaga better. Back to the floor and Savage comes back in the ring with a clothesline for two. Luger gets rammed into an exposed turnbuckle, taking out the ref in the process, and the big elbow follows. This brings Flair in for a KO shot with brass knucks, but Hogan makes the save and keeps the ref from counting. So that’s a DQ at 18:32. Hogan goes to beat up Luger with no provocation, but Sting runs in to help his friend and gets belted by Hulk. Mind your own damn business, Hulk. *** Back with everyone talking about wrestling in the ring, and Sting points out that Hogan’s hetero life partner Savage isn’t exactly a trustworthy fellow, either. HOW THE FUCK DID THEY NOT BOOK MEGAPOWERS V. STING & LUGER?!? Next week: Sting & Hulk Hogan v Ric Flair & Arn Anderson!