I think everyone has one or two people on their Facebook friends list that use the social media platform as a scheme to push some product they believe in to the annoyance of others and the benefit of whatever affiliate marketing program they’re a part of.
These folks so believe in this product – Plexus Slim, Shakeology, All Day Energy Greens, whatever – that they lay into you with a golden shower of enthusiasm and quasi-subconscious “WHY ARENT YOU DOING THIS!?” talking points. When someone is so blatantly enthusiastic about a product, my ‘BS’ meter goes off. Especially if that product claims to kill the pounds, lose the weight, kick-start my sagging metabolism, or give me rock hard pubic hair.
So it was weird that I was eager to try DDP Yoga. It’s weirder still that I really like it. Before I get started I want to let you know that I’m not trying to sell you anything and my technical mastery of various work out terms is suspect as best. I am to exercise was David Arquette is to WCW World Champions.
The DDP Yoga package is interesting. The deluxe edition I ended up with has 6 DVDs, a heart rate monitor, a booklet (see above), a poster of all the moves, and enough positive energy to jump a dead car battery. It’s all contained in a paper / plastic bag kind of thing, and I’ve taken to carrying my DVDs in a re-purposed “The Sims 2” case for a little more security.
The booklet is pretty wonderfully written and got me to drink the DDP Kool-Aid to a point. He explains his story, how he discovered and invented DDP Yoga, why it works, how it works, what’s contained on the DVDs, and it’s reassuring as all get out. If you cheat on your diet a day? Just work out a little harder the next. Skip a workout? get back on the wagon. DDP has done a kind of wonderful thing here, positioning himself as a surrogate “Cool” uncle. I have half expecting a “Go get em’ champ!” by the end of the booklet.
The actual end of the booklet, when he gets into the nutrition side of things and starts talking about starches, complex carbohydrates, and breaking food down into serving sizes and cup sizes, caused me to go a little cross-eyed, but there is a bevy of quality information in the booklet for those looking to get their diet mostly on track AND get in shape.
Still, considering how approachable the workout has been (so far) it’s a bit of a bummer the diet portion is more technical and complicated that I’d like.
Stick your arms out to
your sides and flap them up and down 10 times. Now do the same thing
again, but while making a clenched fist and flexing where your muscles
should be as you can. The second one is a bit harder, right?
I don’t want to give away the farm, but it seems the ‘secret’ to DDP
Yoga is the idea of dynamic resistance training, and if how sore I am is any indication, it works like a charm.When DDP refers to it as “Yoga for Regular Guys”, he’s not kidding.
There’s several references to making the work out ‘your own’. There’s a few
ways to modify some of the trickier yoga maneuvers if you’re lacking in
upper or lower body strength – which is good. If you can’t bend all the way down, or do a complete push up, he presents a variety of move modifications that still benefit your workout without completely sapping your stamina. In fact that’s what I like so much about this particular program.
There’s an element of shame to working out for the first time – for me at least. After 27 years of being a somewhat sloth-like human being, taking first steps toward fitness can be a little embarrassing if your weight has made you a self conscious individual. You go jogging and immediately feel intimidated by those who are running faster and with more ease than you are. You try to eat right and naturally someone says something about how the thing you’re eating that you thought was good for you, is loaded with sodium or carbs or gluten or some other thing that kind of discourages you from the whole shebang.
But with DDP Yoga, the only person who knows you’re making an idiot of yourself is you….and your Xbox One camera if you’re a conspiracy theorist. Even better, so far, I haven’t felt left behind, or out of shape, or like a fat load with no hope in sight. For whatever it reason it hits a very specific sweet spot that is satisfying and cardio intensive, but not exhausting or overwhelmingly demanding of your chicken-nugget-shaped body.
By the end of the first workout I was sweating, tired, but elated. Filled with so much piss and vinegar I wanted to build a science-fair volcano.
I’m three ‘official’ workouts into DDP Yoga, doing two yesterday and one this morning before work and am about to tackle another after posting this and before checking comments. I’ve also tackled his ‘office’ workout which explains the whole concept behind dynamic resistance better than I can. It’s pretty freakin’ wonderful.
Right now I’m pretty sore, but it’s a satisfying kind of sore. My armpit muscles hurt, my upper arms, my ass hurts, my legs hurt, but at the moment I can’t get enough. I can’t say with 100 percent certainty that I’m going to stick with it for the rest of my life, nor can I say, yet, if it will change my life.
But thus far, in the proverbial glow of a new thing that promises to make my life a little healthier, while ALSO appealing to me as a pro-wrestling fan (One of the moves is a “Hulk Up” kind of thing, its fun!), I can’t get enough.
There’s also a wonderful community over at teamddpyoga.com happy to offer advice. I’m not sure how many of them are going to try and sell you the system and get commission, but it never hurts to sign up and have a peek around.
Anyway, this is the most confident I’ve felt about this kind of thing, ever. I’ll come back in a month or so and provide a status update and maybe some kind of before and after and some updated impressions. Until then, I’m down to answer any questions or whatnot as it pertains to a totally out of shape guy bending himself in ways he’s only seen in the kinky porno.
|He’s a real Doctor|