MeekinOnMovies On…”Parker”

Director: Taylor Hackford
Starring: Jason Statham, Jennifer Lopez
Runtime: 118 minutes

The pulpy, B-movie thriller Parker is a curious choice for Director Taylor Hackford. Hackford is probably most known as the man behind An Officer and a Gentleman, Ray, Everybody’s All American, The chilling Dolores Claiborne, and one of my all-time favorite guilty pleasure movies, The Devil’s Advocate.
Those movies, while varying quite wildly in terms of quality and
subject matter, are almost entirely focused on human (or non-human)
interpersonal drama and conflict – which is something Hackford
traditionally does well. Even in a rightfully maligned film like the
aforementioned Devils Advocate,
the performances and characters were memorable, if not entirely three
dimensional, and it made for some compelling drama and lasting images.

But, compelling drama direction does not necessarily make for a quality action thriller.

Parker seems to have all the elements in place for a slam-bang B-movie thrill ride, and they never quite
come together. Interestingly enough, the most inspired pieces of the
film are small moments of incredibly high tension mixed with high
comedy, which are few and far between.
Parker follows the exploits of, well, a guy named Parker,
played by Jason Statham. He’s a world-class thief, a master of
disguise, weaponry, hand to hand combat, and continuously sports the
sort of rugged five o’clock shadow that drives the girls batty. Things
kick off with a fairly entertaining robbery of Ohio’s State Fair, where
Parker, dressed as a priest, charms his way into the cash office of the
fair, while his clown-dressed cohorts sneak in from below. Meanwhile,
 Carlson (Wendell Pierce) keeps watch, and Ross (Clifton Collins Jr.)
 is tasked with setting fire to some hay bales to create a distraction.
Parker is a thief with a heart, however, and calmly assuages a
hyper-ventilating security guard before he and his crew make off with
all the money. What a sweetheart.  

things are not all hunky dory, as almost immediately after the heist,
Parker refuses to partake in another, riskier job, and is shot and left
for dead. The betrayal by his crew, creates the setup for this revenge
tale, as audiences watch with relative delight as Parker goes from
practically dead in a ditch to mercilessly coming after the people who
put him there. This country sprawling  trek takes him from Ohio to New
Orleans, with visits to Chicago, and Sunny Florida, as Parker amasses
his resources, reconnects with his trusted contacts, and prepares for a
show down.

does a pretty good job of honing in on Statham’s character. He’s
merciless, but not without a heart, only killing those who he deems
deserves it, but is not afraid to intimidate, hurt, or maim the
(relatively) innocent in order to get his way. Statham’s screen
presence, and ability to take seemingly any material given to him
seriously, go a long way to making Parker more entertaining than it probably has any right being. Parker
is at it’s best while depicting the cunning creativity of it’s
namesake, whether it’s escaping from a hospital with a somewhat willing
hostage, dressing as a Texan to scope out potential hide-outs, or hiding
out in the apartment of Jennifer Lopez’s character while she tries to
distract a cop who’s come snooping around.

other members of the cast do not fare as well. Nick Nolte appears in a
supporting role, providing money and resources in times of need, but
really serves as an expository device, which can be kind of a pain
considering the talented actor’s tendency to mumble through dialog.
While Michael Chiklis is set up as the main nemesis of Parker, sadly he
and his crew is given very little to work with besides the procedural
set-up for their heist, and standard “Oh crap! He’s alive!” style dialog
once they learn the rumors of Parker’s demise had been greatly
exaggerated. The immensely talented Bobby Cannavale pops up in a
supporting role, but only serves as a foil to remind us how hot Jennifer
Lopez is, consistently hitting on her in every scene he appears.
 Jennifer Lopez appears quite a ways into the movie, and while she isn’t
a tour-de-force, does display ample…Charisma (among other things)
that eeks out more than a few smiles from the audience, and her and
Statham do have a midocrom of chemistry within their begrudging

interpersonal relationship between Statham and Lopez, or Statham and
any of the characters, are the highlights of the film, which is weird.
Typically a B-movie action flick would be filled with cheesy dialog,
throw-away characters, and scenes that really only serve to move us to
next action set-piece. But alas, those action set-pieces feel…flat.
Aside from a brutal bare-knuckle brawl involving a toilet-seat cover and
perilous tumble over a high-rise balcony, the rest of the action seems
largely perfunctory. Part of me thinks this was possibly the point –
that Statham’s Parker
is so good at what he does that nothing is spectacular or over-the-top.
The final confrontation at the movie’s climax is actually completely
devoid of real stakes if you think about it, and the heist scenes are
shot in a fairly standard way – which tends to suck the drama out of

most exciting moments involve things like cleverly breaking into the
manager’s office at a nightclub, shooting and robbing an armored truck
driver (in the nicest way possible, all things considered), talking a
document forger out of shooting his very large gun, and a short sequence
where a battered, bruised, and bleeding Parker hides out in Lopez’s
apartment while her typically yippy dog trails in little bloody
footprints on the floor of the kitchen. These moments pulled the
audience in, allowing them to smile gleefully at the cleverness on
display. But beyond these scant few moments and an occasional joke or
two that can catch you off gaurd, the movie is fairly standard stuff.

And standard is the problem here. Parker lives in the uncanny valley between “Bad” and “So bad it’s Good”. It’s not a bad
movie, it’s not embarrassing or stupid, or incomprehensible, but it’s
not inspired either. It reminds me of a theme park roller coaster with
the shortest line. Parker’s not
the fastest, or the longest, or the scariest, but it has one or two
little hiccups that do just enough to serviceably entertain you. But,
there are certainly far better coasters, with steeper drops, crazier twists, and better turns, that you should probably try out first.    


Paul Meekin is a writer, producer, editor, and all around nice guy. You can like him on Facebook, follow him on Twitter  and check out his other writing at Hollywood Chicago  and