The Ascension, Descended

So apparently Kenneth Cameron of the Ascension was arrested for a DUI and fired, thus breaking up the Ascension team.  Yeah, it's a shame for the tag division and another black eye on the "young wrestlers in WWE just hang out in hotel rooms and play video games" nonsense, but really, the biggest WTF thing for me is that his real name is Tom Latimer.  What kind of butt-ass stupid writing system do they have when the best wrestling name they can come up with someone is KENNETH CAMERON?!  I had just assumed that name was so stupid that it had to be his real one, but no, someone actually thought that was a better name than "Tom Latimer".  Why not "Lazarus" instead of "Latimer", which at least kind of sounds like his real name and would play better into the mysterious heel team gimmick?  Even sillier, his partner Conor O'Brian's real name is Ryan Parmeter, which at least sounds more exotic and dangerous than a play on a talk show host.  

I would seriously sit at home and think up awesome wrestling names for these goofs if WWE would pay me for it, because I seriously couldn't do any worse with only 15 seconds of thought than they do.