As noted in the Dynamite rant last night, I finally managed to snag some AEW Unrivaled figures off ShopAEW, and got Santana, Ortiz and Matt Hardy for $25 US each plus shipping, which is totally worth it to me. So with Hangman Page that brings my total to four now after nearly a year of trying to track any of them down here in Canada. Still need Kenny Omega, still need Chris Jericho, still need Orange Cassidy, but this is a start.
Sorry to break the ECW/NXT streak but I have no absolutely no desire to watch any more Heel Michael Cole and/or Matt Striker. If I’m going to sit down and watch bad wrestling, I want it to be at least fun bad wrestling.
I started writing about Herb’s cocaine-fuelled company a few years ago for my own site but The Great Crapping appears to have wiped the six type-ups I did so ah what the hell, let’s start again.
ECW on Sci Fi Date: January 16, 2007 Location: Alltel Arena, Little Rock, Arkansas Commentators: Tazz, Joey Styles
We are almost to the Royal Rumble and that means it is time to make Test #1 contender. That is about as obvious of a title match as there has been in a bit around here. Last week Test cost Van Dam his title shot so tonight it’s a triple threat. Normally you would think that would be saved for the Rumble if they want the biggest match possible, but ECW can be weird that way. Let’s get to it.
Imagine a world in which WWE and AEW could trade wrestlers between each other like real sports teams do. What trades can you come up with that benefit both sides?
My first trade is Asuka for Nyla Rose. Vince doesn't seem to value her or any other Japanese wrestler, and Nyla seems to have reached her peak in AEW and if he'll push Nia Jax and Tamiya, he'll push Nyla.
Second trade might be too obvious: Ricochet for Kip Sabian and Penelope Ford. Ricochet is obvious, and for some reason Kip Sabian feels like he should be a bigger star than he is and maybe in NXT he'd have a chance.
My third proposal is kind of out there. AJ Styles for Sammy Guevara. The appeal to AEW of Styles is obvious, but they'd have to give up something of value to get him, and that's Guevara. Vince has been trying and failing to create a Latino world champion he can push to the moon, and Sammy Guevara is clearly a future world champion and would give him that.
What trades would you do?
I think Sammy would be too small for Vince, actually. I'd go with Wardlow for the entire Undisputed Era.
Bonjourrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr ya cheese eatin’ surrender monkeys!
Next week we’ve got a Stinker Review on the docket, but first we must close out our journey to the Summer of 1996 with a trip to our old friends from Philly. ECW was on a pretty decent hot streak at the time, although they couldn’t get on pay per view despite Paul Heyman’s many attempts. I used to have the Laserlight Digital cut of this show and I liked it so much I eventually shelled out for the RF Video version just so I could watch it with the real music left intact.
The big stories during this time period were Raven’s feud with The Sandman, which involved Raven quite literally stealing Sandman’s family from him in a super dark storyline that hit all kinds of nerves but never really had much in the way of a satisfying payoff due to Raven needing to divert course to feud with Terry Funk when 1997 came around.
Elsewhere, Taz was in the middle of his “Path of Rage”, where he’d destroy absolutely everyone on route to a big match with his nemesis Sabu. Shane Douglas was trying to connive his way to the ECW TV Title whilst also trying to avoid getting killed by the angry Pitbull’s. D-Von Dudley was trying to wrest control of The Dudley Family from his brother Big Dick.
And in the tag division Da Gangsta’s, The Eliminators, The Samoan Gangsta Party and The Bruise Brothers all hated one another and were feuding amongst themselves in various combinations, with it all building to a Four Way Dance on a future show for the tag belts themselves.
So yeah, lots going on and this show was sure to continue it. It also has genuinely one of the all-time greatest ECW matches on it, so let’s quit our jibber-jabber and watch some chuffing wrestling!
A review of the Chyna documentary from Vice, although it’s not part of the Dark Side of the Ring series. Chyna’s one of those stars who I wasn’t following on and off for all the gory details of her personal life falling apart, although I knew it wasn’t going well a lot of the time.
Dynamite Date: June 18, 2021 Location: Daily’s Place, Jacksonville, Florida Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Excalibur, Jim Ross, Taz
The Friday series continues with a special match inside an MMA cage. That may or may not be your taste, but it is certainly something different, which you have to do at some point. This time around it is Jake Hager vs. Wardlow, which is about as logical of a move as you can get. Let’s get to it.
Not sure how long they’ll last there, but ShopAEW has some of the Series 4 figures available tonight: https://www.shopaew.com/figures I actually picked up Santana and Ortiz for a total of $66 Canadian with shipping, which is pretty damn cheap. I was tempted to grab Matt Hardy as well but I’m holding off for the moment.
Taped from Jacksonville, FL
Your hosts are Tony Schiavone, Jim Ross & Excalibur
Smackdown Date: June 18, 2021 Location: Yuengling Center, Tampa, Florida Commentators: Pat McAfee, Michael Cole
For the first time in over twenty years, we’re getting a Hell in a Cell match on free TV, as Universal Champion Roman Reigns is defending against Rey Mysterio. Why you ask? There doesn’t seem to be much of a reason other than “let’s do it on TV”. That is quite the change of pace and I’m not sure how bright of a move it is. Let’s get to it.
And now we’ve reached the end of what I can find for Joshi in 1994, so here’s my summation for the year! And it was a big one, with the future looking bright! Until it wasn’t! Read on!
Joshi had its biggest year ever in 1993, thanks to the massive Dream Slam, Thunder Queen Battle, and more, all culminating in St. Battle Final by the end of the year- 1994 had a lot to live up to, but went from strength to strength as they cap things off with the biggest joshi card in history at the Tokyo Dome- Big Egg Wrestling Universe is, to this day, the largest gate for any women’s pro wrestling event. Though they didn’t come close to filling the Dome and that’s hard to call a major success, it’s definitely made an impact. During most of the year, Akira Hokuto proclaims the “Dangerous Queen Final Countdown” as she prepares to leave AJW and move to Mexico, so she has all kinds of amazing Dream Matches in cards until Summer… and then she’s just back in AJW and that’s that for a while.
The year starts with a brutal, bloody Aja/Hotta match that sees Aja tear Hotta’s hand apart and dominate her. Kyoko beats Yamada for the All Pacific Title and that’s mostly it for Yamada’s push. The Tag Champs reign supreme for ages until October, and Manami Toyota’s push builds and builds throughout the year. She & Hokuto are the obvious work-horses of the year, putting out crazy batting-averages for great stuff. The year gets off to a great start with March’s Wrestling Queendom ’94, having a ridiculous string of awesome matches (Kansai/Sakie- ****1/4, Manami/Plum Mariko- ****1/2, LCO vs. Ozaki/Cutie- ****3/4, Aja/Bull vs. Kandori/Hokuto- *****), capping off the amazing Hokuto/Kandori feud with a story of them gaining respect for each other in a tag match against the former and current Aces of AJW- Kandori helps Hokuto pin Aja Kong to win the match, then slaps her hand out of respect and marches off leading her LLPW ring girls to the back. Just an amazing moment capping off a huge card.
We can all agree that nearly 10 years later and Brock ending UT's streak was not a good call, as it just lead to something weve already seen before with Brock as a part time wrestler/champ. Right now there is nooooooooo one in WWE or NXTUK that is worthy of defeating Reigns or WALTER, both that they haven't built anyone up even close to sniffing such glory, and i have no doubt they cannot come up with a compellling story and feud after those champs are beat.
What are the WORST possible outcomes for these two champions reigns ending that you can absolutely see this company pulling? Theys seem to love giving Joe Coffey title shots for whatever fucking reason and i'm worried its only a matter of time they pull that bullshit. Even with King of the Samoans making the title more relevant than it has in years, they still see it as props. I have complete faith they'll think the wrestling world will be revitilized and ratings will soar as Dominik Mysterio wins it on whatever ppv happens in the fall. oh and or Thge Miz
It's gonna be Cena. We all need to just accept it now to begin the healing process in advance.
Who would have made great Money in the bank winners in the 80s/90s?
My choices are dibiase (he buys the briefcase off someone; hires people to wear down the champ and then cashes in); honky Tonk man (he tries to find the perfect moment to cash in against hogan/savage/warrior but can never find the right moment), and Owen hart (he wins mitb instead of king of the ring and cashes in on Bret).
Oh my god, Owen Hart fluking into the MITB win and then cashing in on Bret one day is the visual in my head that I never knew I needed until you mentioned it. Can you even imagine the celebration? Especially if it involved getting Yokozuna to destroy his brother first and then proudly cashing in and pinning himself, and then doing a 10 minute celebration? We need to make this happen.
You've mentioned before that Bart wasn't actually deliberately sent out to die against Butterbean at WM15 as punishment for messing up their plans for the Brawl for All. However, since Bart pretty much disappeared from TV after winning the tournament and (as far as I recall) didn't show up again until the WM build, doesn't that indicate that there was some degree of retribution for knocking out “JR's Boy” even if getting murdered by Butterbean wasn't itself part of it?
I still don't think it was ever retribution, it was just that Bart couldn't deliver whatever it was they wanted out of him to capitalize on winning the tournament. Like when has Vince ever given a shit about JR and his favorites before then?
Impact Wrestling Date: June 10, 2021 Location: Skyway Studios, Nashville, Tennessee Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Lo Brown
It’s the go home show for Against All Odds and that means it is time to focus on Moose vs. Kenny Omega for the World Title. Other than that though, we could use some build for the rest of the car. The rest of the card could use some attention of its own and odds are we might get that this week. Let’s get to it.
NXT UK Date: June 17, 2021 Location: BT Studios, London, England Commentators: Nigel McGuinness, Andy Shepherd
Things might be a bit slower this week as we are coming off a pretty awesome title change last week. Meiko Satomura is the new Women’s Champion, meaning we could be in for something a bit slower this time around. I’m not sure what that is going to mean for the show, but NXT UK is pretty awesome at the moment so they should be fine. Let’s get to it.