BoD Daily Update, Part II

Sting Update


According to PWInsider.com, Sting is not scheduled to be in Philadelphia for the Royal Rumble.

http://pwinsider.com/article/91089/royal-rumble-news-and-notes-including-possible-spoilers.html?p=1






Another Former WWE Wrestler Rumored to be a Surprise Entrant in the Royal Rumble


There is a rumor among some of the wrestlers that the Boogeyman will be making an appearance in the Royal Rumble match.

Credit Mike Johnson, PWInsider.com






Layla Update


Layla has recently underwent surgery. It is not known what the surgery was for but it was not due to an in-ring injury. There is no timetable for her return.

http://pwinsider.com/article/91090/layla-update.html?p=1

MeekinOnMedicine On…DDP Yoga Part IV: Wrestling Saves Sanity

One thing I’ve learned about life is that if you really let go, it’s just a joy ride ~Ricky Williams

In New England it seems the best medicine is to ignore any and all
medical problems until you’re dying or bleeding – ideally both. And even
a whisper of getting mental help? You’re weak. You’re faking. Tough it out. Be a man.

I would hand-to-god rather die
than have anyone think of me as a ‘cry baby’ or wuss. And aside from a couple of
stitches as a toddler, and a surgery in second grade to put a testicle
lodged somewhere up around my Adam’s apple down where it belongs, I
haven’t spent any time getting urgent medical care. For a while there, ‘tough it out’ was
my middle name.

But my family tree has more people hanging from it via their own hand
than I’d care to count. With an ocean’s worth
of thoughts swirling around in my head, I sought actual help,
and in addition to a John Holmes-sized load being lifted off my chest, I
was given a drug called Lamictal.

It almost killed me.

Lamictal (generic: Lamotrigine) is a drug given to epileptics to control
electrical impulses in the brain that cause seizures. Psychiatrists
also use it to help folks with bi-polar tendencies – Ya know, the
kind of folks who would post non-wrestling related content to a
wrestling blog, then get actively annoyed when people are actively
annoyed with it – sound like anyone you know?

Lamictal can also cause a very severe rash that…well, Google “Stevens-Johnsons Syndrome” and you’ll see what would have been in store for me had I done by Irish Catholic duty and ignored it. One day I woke up from some very, very, strange dreams to find myself covered in a rash, with a fever, flop sweat, and the feeling I was about to have a heart attack as my chest pulsed furiously.

So, like that, I had my first ever stay in an emergency room. A Vietnam Veteran was mandated by hospital rule to push my hefty ass around the hospital in a wheel chair for an X-ray and from test-to-test.  I got my first ever IV and was given some kind of medication to combat the reaction to the other medication I wasn’t allowed to stop taking right away because it could result in even worse symptoms – like ‘homicidal thoughts’. The words ‘potentially life threatening’ were used more than once.

The fever and pulses turned to intense itching. Little tiny pin pricks, like bugs crawling on the skin and biting with every single step – so painful and intense my limbs would involuntarily flail and I chipped a tooth after hitting myself in the jaw.

I watched World War Z just to find other human suffering on my level. I went *back* to the emergency room the next day, and they gave me medication to combat the itching. Naturally that medicine did jack, and upon calling a dial-a-nurse and being told BOTH of the medicines I was given take 24-48 hours to take effect, I was about broken – what’s this about homicidal thoughts, again?

This is what I got for attempting to get my head right? This is what I got for going against what my parents thought? This is what I get for trying to feel ‘normal’? There’s nothing they could do?  The nurse; “Take a lot of cold showers,”. Thanks.

And then… DDP Yoga. It was not a strong edition of Energy, no. But I flexed on my hulk ups, tucked my butt when DDP said so, and felt every bit the idiot I always did when doing the YRG Warrior Position. On the list of excuses to find your way into an ice cold
shower three times day, clearly this was among the best. By the time I made it through, hopped in the shower, and hopped out..holy shit.

Same Day – Left: Medication / Right: Yoga-cation

These photos were taken the same day, one in the morning, and one about four hours later after working out and taking a nice long cold shower. I was a new man. And yes, that is an actual upper arm muscle. I named him Victor Conte. I bumped up to the ‘Fat Burner’ workout, then threw the Red Hot Core mini-workout onto it, feeling just a bit better each and every time.

Now, seven days and…11 workouts after this whole ordeal started, three new medications to take, with about four hundred dollars in medical bills literally putting a price on my mental health…I find myself compelled to write about this whole thing – but unsure of the point.

Why, again, am I here, telling you about DDP Yoga? Why do I give a fuck if you give a fuck? Do you give a fuck? Does posting yet another photo of myself wearing far-too-baggy pants with a dopey “I can’t believe how much less of me there is!” expression on my face help anyone or do any good? 

Why am I bothering you with this for the fourth time?

Really. Various vegan and health and Yoga oriented sites were interested in bringing me aboard, as there’s nothing more valuable in the health and fitness industry than someone who used to be fat, but they all regarded me with a little bit of…shade. They disliked my lack of enlightenment, the fact I was skeptical of all things yoga and vegan and health and diet, and told me I couldn’t swear or make wrestling jokes.

It’s almost like…the rest of the world doesn’t take pro wrestling seriously, or something. So, face it Otters, you’re the target demo for this DDP Yoga thing, and whether you want to admit it or not, I’m your fun house mirror. The point is in the pointlessness. Some fucking asshole on a wrestling blog can change his entire damn life via some piddle-shit Yoga? I gotta get me some of that.

If you hate me and think I’m pathetic, think about what you, a clearly more talented and better put together person than I, could accomplish via this whole Yoga thing. You’d probably show me right the fuck up and be doing head stands in two weeks.

If you’re portly and simply lack the hutzpah to get started, perhaps this four part series has given you just enough kick to get the program and start the work outs. If you’re in fantastic shape and look down on people who have trashed their bodies with fatty foods and an excess of sodium, you’ll see there hope yet for the great unwashed and over-marinated masses.

And if you’re me, well, it’s all I got. I love games and wrestling and movies as much as always, but that desire to write about them, that passionate fire to shout from the roof tops about the best and worst and the ones worth watching…has dulled. The simple fact that I can bend down on one leg and balance like some
sort of paraplegic airplane with my arms outstretched, while sick with a
potentially life-threatening rash, signals to me that the possibilities are endless – I don’t need to be a ‘critic’ any more than I ‘need’ to listen to well-meaning friends who find it in their heart to tell me eventually “I’ll want to move on to something a little more difficult than…ha..Yoga,”.

The shoulds and woulds and musts are secondary. The future is ahead of me and all doors appear open. I’m not lying when I say my number one goal in life at the moment is to head up to New Hampshire and show ‘The Tomahawk” a ride I got kicked off of for being too fat a year ago, just who’s boss. I may still have a question or six or seven for my shrink, but hey, is Yoga and my own mental resolve can pull through this ordeal, the sky’s the limit. 

Maybe I’ll review WCW Thunder or something. 


MeekinOnMovies On…DDP Yoga Part 1: Impressions
MeekinOnMovies On…DDP Yoga Part 2: Don’t Sweat The Small Stuff
MeekinOnMovies On…DDP Yoga Part 3

MeekinOnMovies On…DDP Yoga: Part 3

秋 7 回立ち上がる 8 – Japanese Proverb

You can’t tell in the photo, but within moments of the picture on the left being taken, the right back leg of the chair I was in collapsed under my own weight, and I spent the night passed out in a three-legged chair.
It was not a proud moment. It was 5 months after high school graduation.

The photo on the right was taken 20 minutes before a date with a very lovely girl with a degree in environmental sciences and an affinity for adventures and cheesy movies and third base. It was a day in which I displayed a confidence I didn’t know I had.

For a time I was bad with that confidence. I had more energy and thereby took on more responsibility
at work, I was churning out a novel’s worth of writing content for WhatCulture and got burnt out right quick, and happened into a couple of romantic relationships with women
who lived pretty far away. Those romantic relationships turned into romantic dinners, turned into
popcorn at the movie theater, turned into skipping my workout to go
spend 40 minutes getting cardio in a different way, if you get what I’m
sayin’.

Thus, what I call being a hopeless romantic, and what
medical professionals refer to as a serious chemical imbalance, has pros and
cons. When I fall for something, I fall hard. Pulp Fiction blows my
mind? I watch everything Tarantino did within a week. Pretty girl asks
me out? I’m half ready to propose on the spot.  But with a snap
of the fingers the shine comes off the apple.

And then…I was hired at a clothing model.

About three and a half months into my DDP Yoga adventure, I was hired (presumably by a blind person) to wear and model fat guy clothes to the tune of 25
dollars an hour, and all the polo shirts I could eat. This isn’t why I stopped, but it was a good an excuse as any to not continue.

My daily yoga went from every other daily yoga, to changing the workout from the longer, more intense “Energy” workout to the easier and shorter “Red Hot Core”. All the mostly healthy choices I made turned into ‘some’ healthy choices, and I found myself at Wendy’s eating a god damn delicious Pretzel Pub Chicken sandwich I swore I’d never eat again…with a large Dr. Pepper.

It was a dark time. I fell out of DDP Yoga the same way a hung person falls out of their boxers – I was flopping around feeling like the world’s biggest dick before I knew it. People complimented me on the weight loss while I was buying junk food from Wal~Mart. People added me on Facebook based on the previous two DDP Yoga entries here, and I preached what I lapsed in practicing.

Then, two things happened about a month ago. First, I read Scott Hall no-showed an event. Whether or not it had anything at all to do with his various demons and shenanigans, it hit me a bit. My entire life I’ve been very…cyclical. I like something, get into it, get out of it, then never go back. I did not want to be one of these people again. If I couldn’t work my creative muscles, I would work my actual ones.

Second, a friend of mine who was doing a “Couch to 5k” stopped the program, and upon asking her about it, she said she felt like a big poop for stopping. “Well,” I said, “The only thing that would stop you from feeling like a big poop would be to start again, right?” She smiled at these words of encouragement.

And in a rare moment of someone actively taking their own good advice, just like that, I was back on the wagon. Energy every day. On days I was sore or busy, Red Hot Core. I was on fire. I worked and worked, mixed Yoga with golfing and hiking, and other physical activities I never liked, but now found myself at least…serviceable at, and actually enjoying my ‘active’ lifestyle.

I don’t know what my modeling boss is going to say when they see there is far less of me than last time, but hey, if I get to hear “You’re too skinny!” for the first time in my life, it’ll be worth it.

I weighed myself for the first time in months, and found I was hovering at a nice, odd, 270.8 pounds, down 20 pounds from the last time I stepped on the scale, and down quite a bit more from my all-time high water mark of 320 pounds. I put on a shirt I knew was too tight on me when I was in college, and low-and-behold, it fit wonderfully. I took the photo you see above, and posted on the DDP Yoga Facebook page because if you can’t tell by now, I crave attention like a commanding officer entering the barracks. 

I was greeted with the following message a few hours later:

It’s entirely possible this was some sort of form letter, but regardless, as far as encouragement goes, I couldn’t ask for more. And encouraged I am. Back on the horse, feeling good, having waded through a valley that I rarely come out of when it pertains to health and fitness.

So, why did I stop? Why does anyone stop? That I can’t tell you. I can tell you people don’t start again because it’s scary.  We only see before and after photos because the middle is murky. We’re told the best way to get back on the horse is to simply get back up on it. But the problem is the horse just threw you off its back like a sack of potatoes.

It’s not getting back on the horse, it’s the fear the horse can throw you off again that sucks. It’s the worry that all the hard work, and tough choices, may not pay off, even though they clearly have, so why bother continuing to make them?  90 percent of the game is half mental. Unfortunately for fat folks, those lacking in confidence, and people who are terrified a work out will leave them behind and feeling fatter than ever, the mental element is the trickiest part to conquer. In my most private moments, I look in a mirror and despite my better posture, loose clothes, real biceps, and healthy complexion, still feel like the guy who got dumped for a lesbian at a sophomore Halloween dance.

But that’s what photos are for. That’s what scales are for. For the first time, ever, suddenly the scale in my laundry room is a comfort. I look at the photo of myself in that Foodler shirt – which I used to wear under all my clothes and tuck into my underwear to make me appear skinnier, and marvel at loose it fits. I tried on a shirt I bought in 8th grade, and it fit. When your mind plays tricks on you, rely on the facts.

The Mirror has…5 faces.

And the facts are as they have always been. There are no secrets. There are no cheat codes. There’s hard work. And that’s scary because working hard on something only to fail is petrifying enough to stop you before you even get started. But DDP Yoga is a good kind of hard work. If you can find
20 minutes a day and a DVD player, and read the booklet, and will
yourself, come hell or high water, to do it? You’ll be blown away by the
changes. But God, you gotta keep at it, because if you stop after seeing what it does for you, it’s impossible to live with yourself.

In the words of REO Speedwagon, if you’re tired of the same old story, well baby, turn some pages. In this case, Diamond Dallas Pages.

…Shut up.

MeekinOnMovies’ Midnight(ish) Mushroom Movie Marathon: Part I

“It’s unfortunate what we find pleasing to the touch and pleasing to the eye is seldom the same.”

After May and June, months where I wrote about 60 thousand words, I was pooped. Kaput. I had ideas and thoughts and topics I could write about, but they
were weak, listless, and got jumbled up somewhere between my brain,
arms, fingers, and keyboard. 

So for the first time in a long time I said fuck this being a writer thing foe a minute, got a big ole bag of
shrooms, and spent all my free time watching every movie I could get my dilated
pupils and rapidly growing and shrinking and breathing hands on.

5 days and 30 movies later, I was a new man. I discovered filmmakers I disregarded, re-discovered movies I had seen as a kid but never understood, and studied any detail I could. This wasn’t a vacation, it was meditation. Picture someone stranded in the desert with tattered clothes, coming
across a can of soda, popping it, drinking it, and making that
“Ahhhhhhh” sound of refreshment. That was me.

I was watching to enjoy, not review – but I am who I am, so here I am
anyway to tell you about why you should see these flicks if you can. The first batch of movies I watched were 90s flicks. Maybe it’s the lack of CGI, maybe it’s the idea that an ‘action’ movie back in those days weren’t all slam-bam action epics, and maybe it’s because I grew up hearing about all these movies as a kid, and wanted to go check them out as an adult.

Thus presented for your apathy are interesting takeaways from the first portion of my fungi-infused sojourn. I hope you enjoy.

 I’ll Do Anything (1994)
Before “As Good As It Gets” James L. Brooks made this movie. This movie,”I’ll Do Anything” was initially filmed as a big-budget musical before test audiences reacted with such vitriol he axed the musical numbers and re-wrote a bunch of scenes. 
This sounds like a recipe for disaster, but instead what you get is a movie with the whimsy of a musical, where characters are a bit more animated, a bit more eccentric, monologue often with wonderful results, and the score feels like a carnival.
For starters, this flick was written by James L. Brooks who had his hands in ‘The Mary Tyler Moore Show’ and ‘The Simpsons’, and a bunch of other TV properties too. Regarding ‘The Simpsons’, it turns out the episode Brooks had the most to do with, creativly, was the “Lisa’s Substitute” episode If you’re seen it, you know he knows his way around a joke as much as he does a tender moment. 
The plot concerns a struggling actor who through a series of circumstances ends up responsible for his daughter, and is woefully unprepared to be a full time father. He eventually ends up dealing with a big time movie exec played by Albert Brooks, gets involved with the ‘who the HELL is that foxy lady’ Joely Richardson, who toward the end delivers an emotional reaction to a certain character’s actions that deserves wild praise.
And then we have Nan, played by Marge Simpson herself, Julie Kraver. Kraver is damn brilliant in this movie, and she is worth the price of admission alone. It’s impossible to find clips from this movie online for some reason, so here’s some choice dialog from her character: 
Matt Hobbs: (asking Nan about moving from Washington DC to Hollywood) Washington, boy, that must have been a big adjustment.
Nan Mulhanney: It wasn’t that bad. Both places have a lot in common: Over-privileged people, crazed by their fear of losing their privileges. Alcoholism. Addiction. Betrayal. The near total degradation of what once were grand motives. The same spiritual blood-letting. I kind of do miss the seasons, though.

Burt: Wanna have a little sex?

Nan: You know, I’ve never hung up on anyone in my life. Because what if the next thing they said solved everything? But I feel I must end this conversation.

Burt: That’s “no”? Hello…?
Anyway, if you’re looking for a surpsingly warm and silly and laugh-out-loud hilarious movie that’s right up the alley of film buffs – including a wonderful scene that explains how ‘acting’ works in a way that makes total sense, I’d seek this one out. If you have Comcast On Demand you should be able to find it under the “MoviePlex” premium channel. 

Trailer:

Shroom Thought: The fact this movie isn’t more popular is a travesty, and I must now Tattoo Nick Nolte’s mug shot on my body.  
—–

Out of Sight (1998)
“It’s like seeing someone for the first time, and you look at each other for a few seconds, and there’s this kind of recognition like you both know something. Next moment the person’s gone, and it’s too late to do anything about it.” 

I caught this movie on Crackle, which is kind of like the Salvation
Army Thrift Store of movie apps. As a kid I remember this flick getting
previewed over and over again on the guide channel, using words like
slick and steamy and sexy.

For what it’s worth, I generally dislike ‘sexy’ movies. In much the
same way  a strip club is an expensive way to get an unusable boner, a
movie featuring a lot of soft-glow love scenes feels like a good way to feel like sleezeball in front of strangers. If
I want to watch people having sex, I want to watch them having sex for real, presumably on a porno site, not
pretending to have sex. So when stuff on Showtime or HBO has that mandated 2-3 minutes of boobage you’ll see in pretty much any of their shows, I’ll roll my eyes.

It’s not that sex in movies is bad, it’s just sex for the sake of sex is bad. In a movie like Jackie Brown, the lone sex scene is played for laughs and conveys something about the characters, instead of conveying naked bodies to the eyeballs of the audience.

So when I say that ‘Out of Sight’ is one of the coolest, sexiest, slickest
movies I’ve seen in quite some time, I mean it. The plot features a
professional bank robber, prison escape, and diamond heist, but is more
about the moment to moment energy of the characters. The way they talk,
the way they act, how they zag when we expect them to zig. 

I’m reminded of something billionaire philanthropist Montgomery Burns said, about how in his day the starlets could tantalize the audience by simply raising a finger or showing a little leg. Here, all it takes a trunk, a little red lighting, and a conversation between Clooney and Lopez that’s weird, esoteric, and forces a smile on your face like you’re watching something you shouldn’t.

In addition to the trunk portion of the flick, there are two scenes, the opening bank robbery, and another involving a ‘date’ between Jennifer Lopez’s character and George Clooney that belong in “That was so fucking cool!” wing of the library of Congress. 

You can watch this movie, for free, right now, and quite frankly, it may be the most fun two hours you have all week.

Best Scene:  



Shroom Thought: Hey, is Michael Keaton playing the same character from Jackie Brown?! (He was!)
—-

Crimson Tide (1995)

Yeah, horses’re fascinating animals. Dumb as fence posts but very
intuitive. In that way they’re not too different from high school girls:
they may not have a brain in their head but they do know all the boys
want to fuck ’em.

Crimson Tide is what I like to call a TNG movie. When Star Trek tossed the science with the 09 reboot, a little part of me was sad. I grew up fascinated by the inner workings of the Enterprise, specifically the Enterprise-D and getting into the nitty gritty of how all the fictional systems functions.

Crimson Tide does a lot of the same things, replacing a space ship with a submarine, and fictional techno babble with, well, real techno babble. If you’re the kind of person inclined to watch a movie because you like a good story, AND you like to know how something foreign and complicated works a bit better, Crimson Tide is one of those ‘entertaining and unintentionally educational’ flicks. The recent ‘Captain Phillips’ was a lot like this too – showing us a lot about how a giant barge and its crew actually functions and works, so when stuff goes haywire, we understand the hows and whys.

Of course that’s just a potato bread bun surrounding the beefy acting of Denzel Washington and Gene Hackman, both good men acting in what they believe to be the best interest of their country, and their duty to the Navy. The tension between the two is like a tea kettle. It boils over, simmers, and after the dust settles both men realize the other was only doing their job to the best of their ability.

This is a wonderful thriller and great fun to watch with parents or loved ones who don’t like hyper violence or intense vulgarity. There’s also some great talking points to pull out of the flick if you’re looking for them. But even if you’re not rest assured you don’t need to look very hard to enjoy this movie a great deal.

Best Scene:


Shroom Thought: I wonder if modern day Submarines get good Wifi?
—-

 A Serious Man (2009)

“…with the right perspective you can see Hashem, you know, reaching into
the world. He is in the world, not just in shul. It sounds to me like
you’re looking at the world, looking at your wife, through tired eyes.
It sounds like she’s become a sort of… thing… a problem… a
thing..” 
There’s a girl I’ve known for about a decade now who is essentially a big yellow light. We’ll go to a salmon run, watch the fish, and she’ll sit a bit away from me, then message me the next day saying I should have kissed her. A few months later I’ll suggest we go look at the stars in a field and smoke hookah, and she’ll decline, only to text me the next day saying how beautiful the sky was and wondering if I saw it. 
I *hate* yellow lights. Which is a problem, because A Serious Man is essentially Yellow Light the movie. There are no real answers to the biggest questions, and you can either soldier through crises or become paralyzed trying to make concrete sense of it all. Either way, you’ll never know.
This is a two paragraph way of saying fuck those cock-teasing Cohen brothers. 
With due respect, of course. Normally I can understand when a movie is good and not my cup of tea, or bad but enjoyable. But for whatever the Cohen brothers are laying down, I’m not picking up. On the first try at least. The Cohen’s make me feel like a moron. I haven’t seen their entire catalog, but what I have seen has always left me with a “huh? Did I miss something?”.
The Cohens remind me of the Hemmingway short story ‘Hills Like White Elephants’ about a couple waiting on the train tracks on their way to get an abortion or on their way back from one. Nothing is every directly communicated about the abortion and the schism in their relationship, but the characters, prose, and construction of the story make it clear what they’re upset about, even though you’re never told with 100 percent certainly. 
And while I appreciate the sentiment, life has enough uncertainties as it is. ‘A Serious Man’ is about a man in a crisis of faith and confidence, as every one of those uncertainties break in the worse possible way. It’s ultimately a bleakly dark comedy with moments of gentle insight and understanding. There’s a scene involving an elder Rabbi, a tape recorder, a stoned boy on his Bar Mitzvah, and a surprising display of respect for Jefferson Airplane that touches the soul like an unexpected compliment from your company’s CEO. 
Still the movie requires studiousness to understand and find fully enriching, and it may not hurt to have someone well versed in religion to ask questions of, depending on your ability to pick up on the definitions of things based on context.
Regardless, the sign of a great movie is that you’re thinking about it days after you’ve seen it, as I have. I don’t know what to think, but I like that its making me think regardless. I’d check it out.
Best Scene:
Shroom Thought: I think having an Italian mom is like having a Jewish mom except you eat better and she has a mustache.

Coming Soon:  Desperado / Jackie Brown / Reservoir Dogs / Dusk Til Dawn / Pulp Fiction / Inglorious Basterds / Death Proof / Django Unchained / In Brughes / No Country For Old Men / The Fifth Element / Zodiac / Kill Bill Vol. 1 / Kill Bill Vol. 2 /Apocalypse Now / Pain & Gain /

MeekinOnMovies On….DDP Yoga: Part II ~ Don’t Sweat The Small Stuff

The photos on the left of the banner are how anyone who has known me in the last…12 years has seen me. The two photos on the right are how I look after barely a month of DDP Yoga, and not stuffing my fat, cow-like mouth with shit as often I used too. Being from a film background I’m fully aware of creative camera angles and all that, but I deliberately did not suck in my gut, nor did I try and ms-represent the results.
Perhaps my body image is playing tricks on me – I feel great, but don’t see much a difference, but two dozen Facebook likes from folks who had no clue I was doing this DDP Yoga thing can’t be wrong, can it?
“share your secret!”, “Where did the rest of Paul go and what did you do with him?”, “Wow!!!! You look amazing! Congrats- I know how hard it is!” From a former “Cosby Show” writer:WTF! NFW! Niiice…GQ ass.” – The only comment I put on this photo was “One Month Later”. 
It’s important to note I was NOT perfect with this, either. I stuffed my face full of crappy potato chips once or twice due to ‘Taker streak-related stress, ate far too many fries, and probably skipped a workout or two I shouldn’t have. 

Before I go any further I want to re-re-re-iterate that I’m not trying to sell you anything, I’m not in the affiliate marketing program, and generally speaking I think 99 percent of anything labeled a ‘miracle’ is 100% bullshit. 

That said, this bullshit is a miracle. 

Indoctrination
The whole endeavor was spurned on by a heart-to-heart with my best friend and soon-to-be-nurse who said in no uncertain terms that if I wasn’t careful I’d probably die at 45 years old and be absolutely inundated with health problems most of my adult life. We made a qausi-pact, I’d get on his ass if he drank too much, and he’d make sure I was keeping my fat ass in check
I then badgered my best friend to try it. I wanted a DDP Yoga sponsor. Someone I could bug about it, brag about it, discuss it with, someone that could share my new found…interest in physical fitness that wasn’t going to beat me over the head if I skipped a particularly tricky move, or think the whole workout was lame because they were already in shape. 
I shit you not, after one Diamond Dozen workout my best friend was hooked. He’s about 6’3 and in pretty good shape, but after the workout he was sweating and as pumped as I was, likely because the dynamic resistance portion of the workout used his (far stronger than mine) muscles against him in a positive way.  In fact, earlier that day he had gone to the doctor for a sciatic nerve, and by midnight he was jumping around like a doofus on both legs with no pain. 
For two weeks running now we’ve met up, done the Yoga, eaten something healthy, then done something really damn stupid to reward ourselves, like drop <rhymes with lake placid> or get really stoned and marathon movies until 8am because we’re so damn energetic from the workout. 
My friend is so far the only die-hard convert. I’ve done a workout with
my sister and her boyfriend, but due to the low cielings in my house
it’s a little tricky to find the room to spread out and do the workout
properly. Thus I’ve been tackling it mostly at work during my ‘break’
where I turn the computer room in my own personal DDP Dojo.

Thus I am still singing the praises of DDP Yoga to anyone who will listen. I’ve suggested it to coworkers, friends, relatives, and often I get a tepid response or a “well I need the space” kind of thing.

I don’t want to sound like a know-it-all after such a short amount of time, nor do I want to seem like all my problems have been solved because I can do a Down Dog for 10 straight seconds without shaking, but it seems the hardest part of anything is starting. 
Once you start, an object in motion tends to stay in motion. Even if that motion is a little stilted or sometimes stalls out briefly.
A side benefit is that if you tackle an ‘Energy’ workout prior to a red-hot date with a Megan Fox / Selena Gomez / Oliva Munn  / Mila Kunis looking chick, you’ll have stamina for hours and hours and hours to the point where you may want to tarp off the ceiling of your car. 

Caveats
 
I’m still on the “Energy” portion of the workout, which is a 21 minute
athletic coup d’état on your body. By the halfway point you’re stunned
by how much you’re sweating and how much you’ve sworn at DDP Yoga as you
drive to get your leg just a little higher in the air, or finally, for
real, attempt and succeed at your first real man push up…ever. 

It also seems the “Energy” portion of the workout focuses on balance quite a lot – and I’m bad at that. getting me in a true runners lunge where I’m only on the heel of my back foot is an incredible disaster every time I try. A lot of the upper body stuff like push ups or holding yourself a few inches off the ground via your upper body is so hard it’s embarrassing. Also toss in the fact that anything that requires me to bend or stretch my foot via my ankle is a pain as I have absolutely zero flexibility there, but I’m working on it.

Regardless of the pitfalls of a given workout, it does get a little easier every time as long as I stick with it. If I skip two days then come back it’s a little harder. A day on / day off cycle seems to work the best, as you get the full day of “WOW I FEEL AWESOME” results.

But here’s the strange thing – I’m not quite sold on myself yet. I feel wonderful, I stand up straighter, I’m eating mostly better, I make eye contact with hot women and don’t feel like Ducky in from “Pretty in Pink”, and the reaction has been pretty incredible. In fact I’m grabbing a hold of the shirt I’m wearing right now and the amount of fabric I can pull away from my body is insane.

But in my head I still have a chip on my shoulder, like all the people saying nice things to me are just doing it to be nice, and all the good things I’m feeling / noticing / experiencing are also all in my head because that’s how I’m supposed to feel. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt this isn’t true, but from my eyes looking outward, I’m still waiting for the other shoe to drop. Some kind of bad news or dark cloud or “Oh well yeah Yoga may be good but did you know it’s actually bad for penis length” or some other kind of crap that tends to happen when stumbling upon something that appears to be too good to be true.

Things like “my clothes are always baggy, my pants are always loose, so maybe I’m just noticing things that aren’t there because I want to notice them” run through my head – as if I’m looking for excuses to NOT believe the very obvious results everyone is seeing. I’ll cheat on the proverbial diet, get a bag of chips, and find myself instantly depressed until I realize I can just make an extra 20 minutes in my day tomorrow and the next day and get back up on the horse.

The Future Soon

When they say 90 percent of the game is half mental, they mean it. For all intents and purposes I am a far healthier person now than I was a month ago, and the results were so damn quick and apparent that my mind hasn’t caught up yet. After 20 years of being fully aware of my fat-load-ness and four weeks or working to change it, and seeing how much better I feel and look and it simply doesn’t quite compute.

And I guess the way to make it compute is to keep fuckin’ that chicken, as they say. More veggies, less fast food, more yoga, more confidence, pushing myself to reach higher and stretch longer,and spreading the word because I simply cannot get over it.

All my life I’ve really, really, really, really, really hated telling people when I was on a diet, because it meant that when and if I failed on that diet they’d likely ask that demoralizing “I thought you were on a diet?” question that shatters confidence like nobodies business.

But this isn’t a diet. I even have a hard time calling it a workout because it comes so naturally and the benefits are so immediate I’m half wondering if they slipped crack cocaine into the heart monitor. As time goes on I imagine the INSANE results will start to die down and it will be replaced by marginal gains over time, which is fine. The point is that of all the things I’ve tried, this is the one thing that’s taken in a way I never expected. I’ve also deliberately avoided weighing myself since I started – I was hovering at 301 pounds without shoes or pants, and I’ll have a new number for you this time next month. 

There’s also the diet element that I’m actually enjoying quite a lot. Carrots, Steamed broccoli, mixed veggies, a little hot sauce, and Almond milk have become my go-to non-special occasion snacks. At first you may find them a little meh, but after a bit – and I’m not just saying this – you’ll find yourself looking forward to eating vegatables as a snack. And again, I’m not perfect. I still get Ice Coffee (with sugar) on my way to work, but go with skim milk. If I absolutely NEED that fried chippy goodness, I’ll get Pop Chips, where you can down an entire bag and only be out 300-400 calories depending on the falvor.

Some of this stuff is more expensive than others, sure, but you’d be surprised how much longer a bag of baby carrots with a little A1 on them goes compared to a 99 cent bag of Sour Cream & Onion Chips or a bag of M&Ms.   

I cannot stress ENOUGH to people who look like me (Kids in school have asked you more than once, to do the truffle shuffle), and have felt like me (namely hopeless), to give this a try and to KEEP trying it. It’s 20 minutes a day. That’s it. It’s one less sojurn into the world of porno, one less cigarette break, one less episode of “Scrubs” or “Trophy Wife” and I SWEAR TO GOD by the end of your second workout you’ll be hooked enough to keep at it.

But for now, try some fucking yoga:

Bump in the Road – Part 6: The Drop


Hey Scott,


Part 6 of Bump in the Road just went live. Could you do your magic and share it, please?


This is the final part of the series, not including the epilogue or afterword. I'll write and post that by this time next week. Naturally, I'm incredibly grateful to everyone who has enjoyed this series. I can only give my deepest and humblest thank you to everyone.

Regards,
Nick Piers

Bump in the Road Part 5?

Hey Scott,

I e-mailed you earlier this week that the fifth part of Bump in the Road had gone up. I wasn't sure if you'd gotten it, though with all the stuff going on with Caliber, it wouldn't surprise me it got lost in the shuffle (along with the gaggle of other e-mails you get).

Anyway, here's the link again. If you could please share it, I'd be very thankful. My paltry little site gets a BIG jump in numbers – over 250 unique visitors. Probably a small number for you, but for a new blog like mine, it's a nice boost.


Thanks again,

Nick Piers

You're not gonna demand an apology first, are you?  

QOTD 110: The Network Part Deux.

This question comes from Magoonie! I hope I spelled that right. Thankfully I was able to locate a photo of Mr. Magoo(nie) and it’s to the left!

His question:

Rumors are going around of the WWE Network having new original wrestling shows (a cruiser weight show). Having said that, let’s say Vince while highly inebriated gave you a weekly show on the Network that would be an entirely different federation with separate characters and storylines. He lets you pluck guys from the main roster that they are doing little to nothing with or NXT guys. No big names like Cena, Orton, Bryan, etc though. You can change these wrestlers up any way you want.

So who would you pick for your roster (10-12 guys)? What changes would you make to them? What type of storylines would you run? How would your show/fed differ from the WWE?
 

Well Mr. Magoo, I would go with bringing back from the dead WMAC Masters with Rob Van Dam:

Bump in the Road, Part 4: Toronto Bound

Hey Scott,

The fourth part of BUMP IN THE ROAD just went up. Do please share it with the Doomers, as you have magnificently done in the past. I must take a moment to thank you, by the way. Every time you post the link, the views on my blog skyrocket. I get around 300+ views, which for me is fantastic. So thank you again for being shameless in helping to promote other people’s work.

Mailbox Roundup Part 2

The deluge of e-mails continues…

Hey, another question for you.   Was Bart Gunn put up against Butterbean to punish him for winning Brawl for All? If Steve Williams had won as planned, would they have done the same thing to him? 

No, the plan for Williams was to program him with Steve Austin when he won.  Bart was put with Butterbean basically as a rib on him because he was walking around bragging about how tough he was backstage. 

Hey Scott,
     Just in case you are getting sick of Daniel Bryan/Batista questions in you mailbox I thought I would go with two old school what if questions. I have two one involving The Hitman and one with Jake the Snake.
1. We all know that Bret was sick/injured/contract was coming up so he had to drop the IC title to the Mountie. This led to the wonderful Rumble moment of Piper winning the belt and then we got the fantastic Hart/Piper match at Wrestlemania. My question is this: what if Hart never drops the title. Do we still get the Hart/Piper Mania match or is Bret in a totally different feud, (or still battling The Mountie) by then.
2. What if Jake the Snake had, as Vince was expecting, been booed when he DDT’d Hogan on The Snake Pit. What happens next? I can’t see anything replacing Hogan/Andre at Wrestlemania but a Hogan/Jake program seems too good to waste just on the house show circuit.

Who could be sick of Daniel Bryan and Dave Batista?  They both have the same initials! 1.  Well, Bret dropping the title was kind of the whole plan, so that he could win it back from Piper and have his big moment at Wrestlemania.  It’s not like they changed plans due to him threatening to leave like Honky Tonk Man did.  2.  Man, if they had 12 PPVs a year in that time, they could have done 2 or 3 at least off that feud.  But I think Jake probably would have been the latest Hogan casualty and then turned babyface as scheduled.  Man, they would have drawn some money, though. 

Hey Scott, I’ve been a fan of your stuff going back to high school ten years ago. I love with the addition of the BOD Daily Update, I can basically get all the big, relevant wrestling news of the day. It cuts back on having to go to another website for news. I love this and was wondering if you ever thought about expanding it to a MMA daily update? There’s obviously a huge crossover of wrestling and MMA fans. So people can not only get your rants and witty banter, their wrestling news, but also their MMA news. One stop shop my friend, eh? Question : I’ve decided to cut loose of my huge cell phone contract and go to the highly-recommended and cheap Republic Wireless. It offers one of the best smartphones on the market for $10 a month, unlimited talk and text. The data for that plan is WiFi only. That’s fine for me because I never surf the web or anything outside of my Home WiFi. I’m just not one of those people constantly with their faces down in their phone. However, I do sometimes use GPS which requires data. Scott, do you and your blog members know of a good GPS app that doesn’t require it? I’ve tried NavFree which is suppose to be the best, but I typed in an address two miles away, and it didn’t work. This certainly isn’t a dealbreaker for me because I do own a Garmin GPS unit, but those units are kinda outdated now, aren’t they? Do people still use them? If anyone is interested in the $10 smartphone plan, here’s a link to join to get a $19 credit, nearly two months of free service. http://referrals.republicwireless.com/a/clk/25WSbv Thanks Scott!

MMA talk on the blog seems to only center on big PPVs and there’s no real interest other than that.  Even I’m pretty burned out on UFC with all the Fox and FS1 shows and UFC Network and stuff.  As for the second question, I’ve never heard of a GPS program that doesn’t need data, or doesn’t need a physical GPS built into the phone for that matter. 

Hi Scott,
Huge fan of the blog since finding it a few months ago. Love your bluntness over issues that some of us just can’t get our heads around or just choose to be too stubborn over!
I know we’re just a day away from the Royal Rumble, but it seems unanimous that the returning Batista is a certainty to win it. So that got me thinking “what happens at Elimination Chamber?”…
Let’s say for argument’s sake Batista does win the Royal Rumble. He is then a fix to main event Wrestlemania and challenge the WWE World Heavyweight Championship. Therefore, at Elimination Chamber I would have thought a throwaway, make-the-animal-look-strong match will be on offer – maybe Batista vs Del Rio (as a result of all the big talk Del Rio has had for Batista in the lead-up to his return).
What then for the WWE World Championship and the Elimination Chamber?
I know it’s not set in stone, but Brock Lesnar laid claim to being the number one contender a few weeks ago. He, along with mouthpiece Paul Heyman, stated that whoever won the Orton/Cena match would face him at Elimination Chamber… therefore what is the point of the Elimination Chamber match this year?
If WWE are going with Batista to win the Rumble then surely his number one contendership for Wrestlemania isn’t in doubt. If Brock is the number one contender for Elimination Chamber then that leaves nothing to play for in an Elimination Chamber match.
What do you think will happen at Elimination Chamber? Has there been any talk of what might happen?
Keep up the good work,

Chamber seems set already, with Batista v. Del Rio and then a six-way for the title with Orton/Cena/Lesnar/Show and maybe Bryan and now maybe Sheamus?  Undertaker can screw Lesnar out of the belt there and set up their match, I’d imagine. 

Hey Scott, I was watching the Austin vs. Rock match from WrestleMania X-Seven and it made think of several questions about blood in wrestling. 1. When was the last, officially-approved WWE bladejob? 2. The intensity of bladejobs is ranked by “the Muta Scale” for a reason, but Eddie Guerrero’s bloodbath against JBL at Judgment Day 2004 is far sicker (fans in the front row were actually given towels to clean off Eddie’s blood!). Where would that rank on the Muta Scale? What about Undertaker in his Hell in a Cell match against Brock? 3. Who would you rate as the “best” five bleeders of all-time — the guys who consistently delivered a “crimson mask” instead of a papercut when it came time to swipe that blade across their foreheads?

1.  Undertaker and HHH got color at Wrestlemania two years ago, didn’t they?  Am I imagining that? 2. I’d give Eddie-JBL around 1.1 Muta and UT-Brock 0.8.  Both are right around the legal limit. 3. I dunno, it’s really not my thing and I’m kind of glad it’s gone.  I like blood as a kicker for a really intense match where called for, but as a spectacle like ECW used to do it’s just kind of gross.  Guys like Abby were really good but look what happened to him as a result. 

Here’s a hypothetical I’ve been thinking about recently.  Hogan remained a draw of sorts in WCW, and then the Hollywood character was a major force behind wrestling’s late 90s resurgence. Let’s say Cena has a falling out with McMahon over contract negotiations, merchandise or whatever and leaves.  He’d never go to TNA because why the hell would you?  Instead he and a business partner manage to get a new promotion up off the ground with a one-hour show on a cable network that is open to extending it to two.  He brings a few of the mid-card guys who he’s good chums with (Ryder, Langston) but no other former world champs/headliners. Would a brand new promotion with John Cena at the top be any kind of a draw or would he find himself in half-full high school gymnasiums by the end of 2014?

WWE is the draw, not Cena.  Cena boosts numbers when he’s on top, but it’s not like he’s talking 10,000 people into an arena like Hogan or Flair used to do.  That’s the beauty of the new system from Vince’s standpoint, in that guys are no longer bigger than the machine.

Scott,
I’d like to preface by saying I like Bryan. I think he’s a great technical wrestler in a time when we are starved for one. However. I personally don’t think the guy is championship material. I wonder if the current upswell of support for Bryan is because we are so starved for a new face.
He’s good. Very good. But as the main man? Dude looks like a homeless guy. Can’t cut a decent promo. His in ring work is great…but that’s about it. Consider this if this were 99, 2000, 01…would this guy be given a second look? MAYBE Shotgun Saturday Night. I think this is us just sick of the status quo. Which is why ratings bombed when he was in the main event. Keep him in the top tier, he deserves it. But as champ, its a recipe for failure. So what do you think? Is Bryan’s rise indicative of how sick we are with the current product or is there something more? Thanks, loved your book.

You know, the ratings bombing is starting to look less than Bryan and a lot more like the other guy who was supposedly bulletproof on top. 

Greetings, Scott!
I kind of have a random thought for you. I was watching ECW’s November to Remember ’99 the other day and I always shake my head at the Rob Van Dam vs. Taz match. You’d figure that would have been such a big deal, ECW’s main man vs. the most over guy on the roster ECW’s supposed biggest card of the year, but I feel it’s the biggest missed oppertunity and pretty much told the world that ECW wasn’t going to survivor much longer. That should have been for the world title and have seen RVD beating Taz to finally become ECW Champion, but instead the match had no heat since it was for RVD’s TV Title, plus Taz had already jobbed the world title away and was practically out the door to the WWF so everyone knew he wasn’t winning. And as a result RVD held the TV belt far longer than he should have and never got the chance to be world champion (yeah, I know Paul E. was building to a match with Mike Awesome for the belt which got scuttled by a freak accident, but that’s beside the point)
I’d like to know your thoughts on this, if you’re willing. Thanks for your time regardless.

Paul was constantly chasing the chase, ya know?  He was awesome at building up anticipation and putting off the payoff, but the payoffs either never came or were terrible.  The Lawler feud, the Douglas-Taz feud, the Douglas-Pitbull feud, the RVD title chase, the Dreamer-Raven feud, you name it.  So many decisions from that period made so little sense. 

Scott, hopefully you can give me a decent answer to this, as I’m stumped. Sting is currently drawing crowds in the hundreds at live events, TNA has had to cut down the number of PPVs because depite him headlining they are brining in buys in the thousands. The tv show which he is a “star” of is bringing in lower ratings than Total Diva’s which star the Bellas. He hasn’t been relevant in the mainstream media for over 10 years. The vast majority of current fans either weren’t around when he was in WCW or were WWF fans. Wrestlemania is WWE’s biggest show which brings in nearly a million buys every year. They have brought in Brock lesnar & Batista, as well as brining back Hulk Hogan, etc for nostalgic purposes. Why would the WWE want to bring Sting in for Wrestlemania? What could he possibly bring to the table that is unique compared to the other options they have?

Because no one gives a shit about TNA or anything that’s happened in it, so bringing Sting in for one or two shots is like bringing in a guy who hasn’t been around for 13 years but gets featured in the WCW retrospective DVDs and talked about like a legend all the time.  It doesn’t MATTER what his true worth is, it’s what they can convince the paying fans that his worth is. 

Place to Be Podcast – Kevin Kelly 2001 Part One!

We recorded an awesome episode with Kevin Kelly tonight. In addition to covering the first half of 2001, Kevin also went into depth on Final Battle, Chris Hero and of course Ring of Honor.
We also put together a Best of Kevin Kelly at Place to Be Nation piece to commemorate our 1,000th published article:
Thanks for sharing with your readers!

Bump in the Road Part One

Hey Scott,

I've mentioned in the comments a few times that I've been to wrestling school, along with saying it was a long story. I've decided to finally start writing that long story. This is Part One of a multi-part article I'll be posting over the next few weeks (likely one part per week). This one is about my beginnings as a fan, including beating up stuffed animals in my basement and some idiotic backyard wrestling in my college days. Next part will be my first time attempting wrestling school back in 1999. Later, I'll go into detail about my time in a Toronto wrestling school about five or six years ago.


Thanks,

Nick Piers

You bet.  And my article "10 Problems Not Caused By the PG Era", as based on your original e-mail, will be up on WhatCulture tomorrow sometime.  

Catching up on ROH part 2: September 14th-15th Edition

I’m back again already to finish playing catch up with ROH.  In this edition, it’s Taven vs Strong, Kendrick vs Steen, and Cole vs Lethal.

Those easily offended by blasphemy are hereby warned about clicking read more…

Open with a recap of Bennett crippling Whitmer 

1st Round Match: Roderick Strong vs Matt Taven w/Truth Martini and the Hoopla Hotties
These poor bastards got the death spot following BJ’s…well, death spot.  The crowd isn’t feeling it early on as a result.  Nigel forces Scarlet to sit next to him since she is not licensed (unlike Truth, Silesia, and Casey Rae–who have a manager’s, bodyguard’s, and wrestler’s license respectively).    Match opens with chain wrestling. The crowd thinks Taven swallows. Roddy gets the better of Taven and beats him in the corner.  Truth grabs Strong’s ankle to stop the assault, but he just shrugs it off and cradles Taven for 2.  Strong’s domination continues with a vertical suplex, so Truth gets involved again!  This time Taven capitalizes on the distraction with a Disaster kick.  Roddy rolls to the floor out to the floor

Commercial

Back with an enzugiri into a sit out suplex from Taven.  A moonsault gets nothing but knees; Strong comes back with that same fucking facebuster that stumped me the last two times he used it.  I tried finding a name, I couldn’t–I have no idea what the fuck this thing is called, and even if I did, it has a highly contrived setup with little visual payoff.  You’re the Goddamn Messiah of the Backbreaker, stick to what you know and break some dome backs–I know what all your variations of that are called!  The whateverthefuckit’scalled gets 2.  Strong fights with knees and elbows; Taven tries to fight back, but it’s a back body drop and a clothesline to the outside for him.  Roddy follows him out; Silesia distracts the ref, and Truth smashes the book of truth over Strong’s back.  Nigel has seen enough and his ready to give Truth a stern talking to damn it!  Strong gets tied up in the argument which allows Taven to recover.  Roddy dodges a boot and Truth gets wiped out by his client.  0.2 Jannettys to Truth for his awkward roll after the bump!  Taven is distraught, Thankfully Strong was there to offer him the consoling embrace of a BACK BREAKER ON THE FUCKING APRON!  It gets a 2 count.  Strong tries for the Strongbow, but Taven escapes and hits the Angel’s wings for 2.  The champ goes up, but Roddy brings him back down with a superplex.  Taven kicks out INTO the Stronghold!  Taven says no to tapping that for the first time in his life and forces the rope break.  Matt uses the tights to hang Roderick on the second rope.  Hangman’s neck breaker sets up a beautiful frog splash that almost gets 3.  Taven wants his Climax–but Roddy isn’t ready for him to finish yet!  He turns it into a back breaker, and then another!  Sick kick puts Taven down–So Strong picks him up and strings him on the Strongbow for the pinfall. *** Great work here.  The TV champion does another non-title job, but he’s honky-tonking the title and not meant to be seen as a deserving champion so, in this case, it works.  This was a simple match, with a “Strong” babyface and cowardly heel, but some easy to enjoy simplicity is what we needed to get back into the show post-Whitmer, so good job guys.

1st Round Match: “Stoned Jesus” Brian Kendrick vs “Mr.Wrestling” Kevin Steen 
Kendrick’s nickname comes from my father, who turned and asked me how much it would have cost them to book Jesus for the show–with him working so many dates in heaven and all.  Casual fans ladies and gentlemen!

The Messiah formerly known as Spanky is out first to a modest reaction.  Steen’s music hits and the crowd goes wild.  Forget Elgin’s hometown pop, Steen obliterates it here.  Jesus starts with a shoulder tackle that finds as much success as a creationist arguing for co-existence on r/Atheism (not much for those of you who don’t speak Internet).  Steen has some advice: “I don’t know about that.  Maybe if you get more momentum.  Gotta really use your hips”.  The stoned savior heeds the advice of the anti-Christ, and tries once more.  The fat devil remains vertical–but concedes “that was better”.  On the third attempt, his holiness dodged a clothesline and took control with a myriad of strikes.  A shoulder tackle takes Kendrick down, Steen celebrates, bathing in the sin of pride.  The prophet of Ghanja takes a powder.  He milks the count for all it’s worth, entering at the ring at the last second; just to turn the other cheek and exit once more.  The crowd boos, because Fuck pacifism.  Steen cannot contain his wrath any longer, and he gives chase.  The Lord (of hash) is caught in Steen’s grasp–but he escapes and hits sliced bread #2 ON THE FUCKING APRON!  I’m noticing a pattern here.

Commercial

Many a sermon put people to sleep, but we are back with Steen escaping a sleeper.  Both guys are down.  They get up at the same time and trade shots in the centre of the ring.  Steen ends up on the apron.  He sunset flips into the ring, rolling it into a sharpshooter!  The crowd approves this tribute to their false idol of Pink and Black!  Kendrick blocks the move from being cinched in however.  He flies high from being catapulted into the corner, lands on the second rope, and springs back with a Tornado DDT for 2.  Steen responds with an F-5 that gets 2. The Package Piledriver is blocked.  Steen channels the holy spirit of Maple Leaf Gardens and reverses sliced bread #2 into a Canuck Commando Unconscious suplex!  Steen wants a cannonball, but Kendrick hides behind the ref.  Steen shoves him out of the way and Jesus kicks him in the nuts.  Christ, what an asshole!  Steen no sells it and delivers a vicious chokeslam.  Cannonball hits and Steen cranks back on the sharpshooter for the submission. **3/4 Joking aside Kendrick seemed…off (by which I mean stoned).  There were three David vs Goliath matches in the first round–and defying all wrestling logic Goliath won all three.  They also descended in quality, with each less spectacular then the last.  Steen is still the most over man in ROH.

Recap of Cole vs Briscoe and Lethal vs Dutt

Quarterfinals: Jay Lethal vs Adam Cole
Code of honor is adhered to.  Long feeling out process to start.  Things speed up into some really good chain wrestling.  Lethal gets the advantage and a pair of 2 counts with a back breaker.  Belly to back suplex gets another 2 count.  Cole fights out of a headlock with a neck breaker for 2.

Commercial

Back with Cole getting dumped.  A Lethal suicide (dive) is stopped when Cole lands a jumping enzugiri from the outside in.  Lethal hits a dropkick and NOW he gets his suicide dive.  both guys make it back into the ring at 17.  Forearms are traded in the middle of the ring.  Cole hits his “Standing Fireman’s Carey Neck Breaker” (number 1 with a bullet on the list of “moves that need gimmick names) for 2.  Lethal cuts Cole off upstairs.  A Sunset bomb and quick shining wizard get Cole another 2 count.  Cole is just not over in Canada, few fucks are given about this match by the audience, and the ones that are belong to Lethal fans.  Lethal combination out of nowhere gets 2.  Lethal hails the King but gets cut off up top by Cole.  Adam is pushed down, but he dodges a missile dropkick.  There is a sloppy reversal sequence that ends in a 2 count for Lethal.  Jay goes for the Lethal injection, but he gets superkicked out of midair!  Kneeling brain buster gets Cole 2.  The younger wrestler spends way to much time arguing and Lethal is able to recover with a jawbreaker.  This time the lethal injection is countered with an O’Connor roll that gets 2.  Lethal superkick sets up the Hail to the King Elbow drop.  Lethal finally connects with the Lethal injection and the crowd finally wakes up.  It still only gets 2.  Lethal places Cole on the top rope, but he slips out and hits a super German suplex. (less insane then it sounds, Lethal took the bump on his stomach)  The Florida Key gets the 3 count. ** did that recap sound like an unenthused listing of moves.  That’s probably because that is what the match was.  Dull contest with a decent finish.  I seem to cool on Cole more every month, and even though I think he’ll win the tournament–he’s my least favorite choice of the 4 semi-finalists.  He’s missing something.  He still has the potential to be great (he’s only 24) but I think it’s too early; the consistency just isn’t there, one week he’ll steal the show, then the next he’ll have an uninspired performance like this one.

The Opener was great, the Steen match was entertaining, but the main event underwhelms. A show worth watching if you are a fan of ROH, but nothing that will turn non-fans into fanatics.  See you all next week for your regularly scheduled review