After winning last week, Colin Delaney is officially part of the ECW on Sci-Fi roster. Armando gives him his new contract and books Delaney vs. Knox for tonight. Sadly Delaney didn’t sign it like Arnie in The Running Man.
We’re in Greensboro, NC and tonight we get a special edition of The Cutting Edge.
We’re in Tucson, AZ and our main event is CM Punk vs. Elijah Burke vs. Shelton Benjamin and OH SHIT IT’S THIS MATCH, rev up the GIF making machine. But first here’s some dude’s sign.
We’re in Houston, Texas the week after the historic Gulf Of Mexico match. We get clips of Chavo being saved by scuba divers and he complains about how ill he is after falling into the disgusting Gulf. Oh and he was stung by a jellyfish which amuses some NFL-Dad type so much he gives it a standing ovation.
We’re in Corpus Christi, Texas and Kofi Kingston has been added to the intro but I don’t see him lasting long. CM Punk starts the show to a roaring reaction to a SOLD OUT CROWD here to watch Smackdown afterwards. Punk recaps last week’s Mariachi Celebration, insisting that although he’s Straight-Edge he does like a good party and we get Dramatic Replays of El Kabong.
We’re in Boston, MA home of Sasha Banks, A-Train and that John Cena guy.
CM Punk & Kane vs. Deuce & Domino
We get a recap of Big Daddy V & Mark Henry destroying CM Punk last week and Kane coming to his rescue. This is a warm-up for the just-announced tag match at Armageddon.
Tazz: ”You could never hang with cool guys like Deuce & Domino.”
Joey: ”What if I was their parole officer?”
Show starts with Matt Striker forcing CM Punk to choose between wrestling either Big Daddy V or Mark Henry tonight. ”C’mon Straight Edge, pick your poison!”
Kevin Thorn’s shitty new look has already been added to the intro.
Nice of them to bother but his last televised match is next week.
We’re in Wichita, Kansas. Well ECW on Sci-fi is, I’ll be in sunny Oberhausen watching wXw when this is uploaded, probably nursing a hangover. Oh sorry, hangöver.