PG WEEK: A Very Raw Christmas 2013

Yes, folks, it’s PG Week here on
Scott’s Blog of Doom. With Scott on vacation all week, he’s handed
the keys to me (I volunteered). Every day from today to December
30th, I’ll be providing you with new content: recaps,
retro rants, audience participation, everything. Sit back, relax,
and enjoy, as we open PG Week with a look at a Very Raw Christmas!
Welcome aboard!

When last we left our heroes, they had
come within inches of the brass ring. Although in a non-title match,
the proof remained that Daniel Bryan could hang with the best of the
best… and were it not for a DQ, he would’ve won. But the show
ended with Orton standing tall over not just Bryan, but John Cena.
With Christmas around the corner, who will enter the holidays with
something to cheer for, and can it be us?
The USA Network ad focuses on the Santa
Fight. The allegedly live look-in does as well.
The PG Era Rant for Raw, aired December
23, 2013.
Almost Live from Stone Cold Steve, TX.  This will be important later.
Your hosts are Ebenezer Scrooge and
Hermie the Elf. Herr Drosselmeyer has the night off.
Mark “Good Santa” Henry and Damien
“Bad Santa” Sandow read Twas the Raw Before Christmas.
And what would Christmas be without HHH
opening the show? He’s joined by Stephanie McMahon, Kane, and an
elf. Kane is handing out candy canes to the aiselway fans. He even
shoves it into the chest of a Daniel Bryan “fan”. HHH talks
about what a special time of year it is, and he says they’ve sent
Superstars to volunteer. But Stephanie makes it clear they would
rather be here in the WWE. They wish us a Merry Christmas with a
great show. And yes, they ham up the Santa Fight, complete with
ominous music. Stephanie: “YAY!” Also, we’ll get Rhodeses/Bryan
v. Wyatts in a 6-man tag. BUT WAIT, THERE’S MORE! With our MAIN
EVENT ANYWHERE IN THE COUNTRY, it’s Langston/Cena/Punk v. Shield. I
get the feeling we’ll be light on angle advancement tonight. HHH
wishes us a Merry Christmas… and just as I’m looking forward to a
short segment, here comes Randy Orton. Did I mention Stephanie and
HHH are wearing Santa hats? Stephanie looks girl-next-door cute in
hers. Orton wishes us a Happy Holidays, and the crowd doesn’t buy
it. Orton thanks the Authority for their support in his quest to be
WWE World Champion. And yeah, he won on his own, but they inspired
him. Orton’s in a giving mood, so he’s going to give the Authority a
Christmas gift. But what do you give to the McMahon who has
everything? Himself. Really. Orton assumes he has the night off,
and we get a group hug. But Kane has something to say: Merry
Christmas to all and to all a good night. And he punctuates it by
setting the corners on fire. Welcome to the WWE.
Tonight, six-on-six women’s action in a
Jingle Belles match. JoJo is missing from the Total Divas side,
which makes it look like she’s in trouble.
It’s PG Week on the Blog of Doom, and I
will use this time to announce that on Saturday, I will do a recap of
NBC’s Tribute to the Troops!
Natalya, Eva Marie, Brie Bella, Nikki
Bella, Cameron, and Naomi v. Vickie Guerrero, Alicia Fox, Aksana,
Kaitlyn, Summer Rae, and Tamina Snuka. Manthief is at commentary.
For the record, AJ isn’t in it because she’s the champ and she’s
scouting. Tamina slams Nikki to start, only to get a tilt-a-whirl.
Kaitlyn jumps in and misses a charge, but catches Eva Marie and slams
her down. Summer Rae walks into a knee smash, and enter Naomi with a
snapmare. She misses a dropkick, but Summer Rae knocks her down and
Alicia Fox enters only to get caught with a rana. Enter Cameron, and
the Funks have a double suplex and bootylicious legdrop combo. Brie
gets caught in a Northern Lights suplex for two. And here comes
Vickie to slap Brie and leave. Yup. Aksana in, and Brie cradles her
for two. Natalya enters next as AJ mocks every single Diva. Nice.
A rollup gets one, but Aksana kicks Natalya and does a DDT/elbow drop
combo for two. And now everybody races in for on reason. This
allows Natalya to get a discus clothesline USING BRIE, then it turns
into CRACKING THE WHIP on all the heels. This may well be the best
and worst comedy spot ever. Having knocked them all down, the Total
Divas take a bow. Everybody leaves, and Natalya gets the
Sharpshooter for the tapout at 3:49. AJ: “Yay! Natalya finally
won something! Good for her!” Last I checked, Natalya has a
winning record in decisions against AJ. The Total Divas do a
not-so-coordinated dance to celebrate. Eh, it’s Christmas. 3/4*
Of note: Michael Cole wasn’t paying close enough attention during the
match and accidentally called Summer Rae “Rosa Mendes”. He then
covered for it by saying it was because he wanted to use Feliz
Navidad. AJ rightly let him have it for that mistake.
Your
Do You Know is about Santa. Hey, if you’re gonna go theme, go
all-out.
Curtis
Axel v. Sin Cara. The transformation is complete: Hunico is the Sin
Cara in Sin Cara’s TitanTron. Sin Cara does the Superstars promo
bilingually. Axel gets a headlock to start, twisting to an armlock
and a slap to the back. Round Two, and Sin Cara returns the favor
and does an armdrag. Tilt-a-whirl headscissors follows, but Axel
trips Cara on a quebrada attempt. Axel shoulderblocks Cara to the
floor and follows, throwing him into the post back-first. Back in,
Axel with an elbowdrop and front facelock as JBL keeps saying Cara
has something to hide. After all, masks mean bad people, right?
Cara fights to his feet but gets slugged down as Cole namedrops
Vampiro Americano. Cara with a bizarre pinning combo for one. Axel
with a dropkick for one. Axel facewashes Cara and taunts the crowd
before going back to the gutwrench. JBL endorses child labor on
commentary (I think) as Cara fights back up only to get slugged down.
A series of reversals sends Axel to the ground, and Cara follows
with a somersault plancha. Back in, Cara with a bodypress for two.
Another headscissors, and Cara does the Tajiri elbowsmash for two.
Axel with a Northern Lariat to avoid the finish and get a two-count.
Cara with the Angle Slam and he goes up, and the Senton Bomb ends it
at 5:22. *1/4 On a
related note, I think Cole and JBL have had eggnog before recording
commentary.
We
recap last Friday’s 3-on-2 handicap match, which sets up tonight’s
six-man. Speaking of, here on PG Week on the Blog, on Friday I will
review one of my favorite SmackDowns – the Mexico SmackDown,
featuring Lucha De Apuesta and a shockingly good Show/ADR match!
Backstage,
we replay Bad Santa’s announcement that he wishes to cancel
Christmas. Because tonight, we have a Battle for Christmas.
Next
week’s Raw is being hosted by Big Show as Baby New Year. I mean, at
least it’s not Ken Jeong in the back of a trunk, but on the
disturbing meter, it’s up there, right?
Batista
is due back: 1/20/14!
Earlier
today, Bad News Barrett was working for the Salvation Army. No, it’s
not a setup for a joke. It’s just Wade doing good things.
We
look back at the Wyatt Family torturing Daniel Bryan. It’s a
collection of crazy things Bray said, following up with the notes
that Bray and Bryan could work together and be stronger than ever.
We follow this up with Bryan fighting all three Wyatts but falling.
Then, on SmackDown, the Rhodes Brothers lost to the Wyatt Family with
help from Bray, after which they tortured Cody some until Daniel
Bryan stormed in to make the save. Then, the Wyatts used their
numbers to take Bryan out of the main event. It appears Wyatt has
finished trying to recruit Bryan and will now destroy him instead.
Rhodes
Brothers and Daniel Bryan v. Wyatt Family. Goldust has a new shirt.
Crowd opens by chanting for Bryan. Wyatt’s shirt has seven tick
marks on it. Cody and Rowan start. Sign guy sign: “IF YOU CAN
READ THIS YOU’RE NOT A WYATT”. Rowan pounds down Cody to start,
but a blind charge hits boot and Cody dropkicks the knee. The
Rhodeses double-team and get one off of it. Rowan powers Goldust
into the corner, but Goldust wins a slugfest and they put him in the
corner. Bryan tags in and kicks away, adding knees until Rowan
shoves him away. Cody tags himself in, and he and Goldust
double-team Rowan. Goldust with a headlock, but he’s in the wrong
corner and Harper tags in. A long eyerake follows, and Harper bashes
Goldust in the corner. A blind charge is two steps slow, and Goldust
uppercuts Harper but can’t snapmare him. He lifts his boot so Cody
can tag it, and Cody takes over on Harper with a dropkick. Bryan in,
and he gets kicked repeatedly in the legs. Harper stops it with a
right hand and works him over in the corner. A big boot is once
again slow, and Bryan puts Harper in the Tree of Woe and begins
kicking like crazy, ending with a baseball slide. Bryan demands
Bray, and he gets the crowd to encourage it, but Harper stays the
legal man as we go to break. When we return, Rowan drops an elbow on
Cody for one. Cole informs us Bray and Bryan didn’t face off.
Harper tags in and taunts Goldust before hitting a charging elbow on
Cody. Harper with the Gator Roll as Cody is busted open from the
elbow. Harper with a headbutt, but Cody steals Ted DiBiase’s
follow-on lariat to knock over Harper. Goldust in, and he bowls
Harper over and nails the kneeling uppercut and inverted atomic drop.
Ten-punch countalong follows, complete with taunt between 9 and 10,
and Goldust stops a blind charge and gets a rana before getting
booted down. Harper brings Bray in now, and he laughs at Bryan
before dropping elbows on Goldust. Bray works Goldust over in the
corner as Cody gets stitched up. Bray blows a kiss at Goldust and
lands an avalanche before doing the inverted look. Harper tags in
and drops an elbow on Goldust on the second rope. Harper steps on
Goldust’s throat, but he misses a drop before clearing the face apron
to keep Goldust in. Rowan clubs away on Goldust as the ref is
pre-occupied with Bryan. Big splash by Rowan gets two. Rowan puts a
neck crank on Goldust and works his gut, but misses a blind charge
only to catch Goldust and keep him cornered as JBL mocks Tony Romo.
Rowan with the IRON CLAW on Goldust, throwing him across the ring for
two. Harper in, but he throws Goldust into the Wyatt corner, and he
beats everyone up with a facejam on Harper. It’s a long crawl to the
corners, and it’s Rowan and Bryan. Bryan’s immediately dropkicks
Bray and goes to town on Rowan with kicks to the leg. He follows
with the cross-corner dropkick, twice, before working on Rowan in the
corner until he’s thrown down. Bryan sticks and moves with a
dropkick to the leg, and now it’s the YES Kicks. Including the
roundhouse! Must be a special night. Bryan goes up, and it’s the
Ram Jam to Rowan. Wyatt charges in, and Bryan punches him and chases
only to be steamrolled by Rowan on the outside. The Wyatts taunt the
Rhodeses as we go to break AGAIN. We’re back for Act 3 as Bryan
elbows out of Harper’s grasp only to get hit with a knee to the gut.
Harper guillotines Bryan in the ropes as we look at the set-up the
Wyatts did just before the break. Bray tags in and headbutts Bryan
before taunting him and boxing him in the corner. This just annoys
Bryan, and he gets fired up only to be floored with a right hand.
Bray goes ground-and-pound now, then drags Bryan into the corner and
tags in Harper, who does a Tope Atomico (!!!) for two. (That’s
Eddie’s flip senton over the ropes.) Rowan in, and he slams Bryan
and adds a diving forearm. Rowan goes back to the neck crank, but
Bryan twitches out of it and blocks a charge, getting a Tornado DDT.
Bray directs traffic, but it’s hot tag Cody, who gets a springboard
dropkick on Harper and a jumping knee. Cody with the Brisco rollup
for two and the sliding uppercut. Disaster Kick hits Rowan, and
Harper eats buckle and moonsault press, Bray saves. Goldust is sent
out, but Bryan leaps in with a missile dropkick on Bray and a tope
suicida as the fight gets personal. Rowan pulls Bryan off and into
the barricade, and Goldust with a flip senton on Rowan. WHERE DO
THEY LEARN THIS STUFF? Harper sent to the apron, but Bray tags
himself in. Harper eats Disaster Kick, and Bray follows with Sister
Abigail’s Kiss to win at 22:28. Goldust races in to help, and Harper
sends him out. Bryan eats stairs courtesy of Rowan as the crowd
chants NO. It’s a 3-on-1 on Bryan, and Bray has Bryan dragged to the
middle of the ring. He taunts Bryan and says it doesn’t have to be
this way. “I could’ve given you the world!” The Wyatts stand
tall as we go black, and when we return, they’re lounging in the
aisle. Given enough time, just about anyone in WWE can put on a good
match. ***3/4
Tomorrow,
PG Week continues on the Blog as I will give you a special What If.
It isn’t about a booking decision; it’s about life or death.
And
now, we have Good Santa being informed of Bad Santa’s intentions and
vowing to stop it. The Force of ham is strong in this one.
Meanwhile,
the WWE sent each Cy Young winner a replica WWE Title belt.
Back
in the streets, Bad News Barrett is still working the kettle and
bell. Barrett is saying all proceeds go to charity. I can only
assume that’s the name of Wade Barrett’s escort.
CHRISTMAS
CAROL SINGING CONTEST! Yeah, why not. R-Truth and Xavier Woods are
up first. Woods does a decent “O Holy Night”, with R-Truth
providing Diddy-esque remix comments. Jinder Mahal and Drew McIntyre
are next; they butcher a rock version of Jingle Bells. You know, it
takes talent to sing this badly. JBL: “Was Jillian busy?” Team
#3 is Santino Marella and Great Khali. They do “Deck the Halls”,
with Khali doing the fa-la-la’s… not well, mind you. Although
Santino’s falsetto singing isn’t the worst I’ve heard. The Cobra is
wearing reindeer antlers, too. Your winners: Santino/Khali. Yes,
really. 3MB are sore losers and attack, but Truth and Woods cut them
off and it’s a mass jobber beating. Santino apologizes for the
fight, and in order to make up for it: a four-man Wish You a Merry
Christmas. Khali doesn’t know the words. You get the feeling Vince
knows nobody is watching?
Up
next, a Christmas Present on a Pole Match between Fandango and Dolph
Ziggler. Yeah, Vince knows.
As
I’ve said several times, it’s PG Week on the Blog, and I’m going to
close it on Sunday with a special WrestleMania Rewind! You, the
fans, get to decide which WrestleMania I recap! Feel free to discuss
what sort of torture to put me through in the comments!
Pole
Match: Fandango v. Dolph Ziggler. The candy cane pole has a present
on it; first to claim it wins the match and, presumably, the gift.
Were they giving out Santa hats to the first five rows, or did they
all co-ordinate? All the big names are here: We Hate Cena Guy, Sign
Guy, Brock Lesnar Fan… it’s like a greatest hits in the crowd. We
then learn that the prize is an I-C title match. Wisely, both men
race to the corner and try to get up to the pole, but neither one
succeeds. Fandango punches Ziggler as we get into the match proper.
Cole: “I’d like to see [JBL] scramble up a pole.” Dolph with a
dropkick and he climbs, but Fandango stops it. Fandango works on
Dolph in the corner, then follows with a back elbow. He climbs, but
Dolph yanks him off the corner. Dolph with a big right, but Fandango
fires in a knee only to get Hammer Thrown away from the pole. Dolph
is all alone and climbs, but Fandango catches him for a powerbomb
only to get sunset flipped and Rocker Dropped. Cole more or less
admits they gave away Santa hats. Good for them. Dolph is climbing
again, but Summer Rae trips him (I think) and Fandango charges Dolph,
sending both to the outside. No, on replay, Dolph just slipped to
buy time. Fandango is higher up, but Dolph follows him and they’re
both on the top rope. Fandango goes down, but bounces back up with a
rope-assisted roundhouse kick. Fandango then climbs OVER Dolph to
the top, but Dolph recovers and makes a soprano out of him. Dolph
goes up and has his hand on it before Fandango stops him and sends
him off the ropes into the steps. And with that, Fandango will face
Langston next week. Time of the match: 4:43. It’s a pole match;
they’re kind of all the same. 1/2*
Coming
up later: Cena, Punk, Langston v. Ambrose, Rollins, Reigns.
I’ve
never plugged a commercial before (so far as I can remember), but for
our military I’ll make an exception: www.HireHeroesUSA.org.
Prime
Time Players v. The Usos. Darren gets mad that Titus O’Neil does all
the talking, then immediately addresses “Houston”. They’re not
in Houston. Darren is pouting over his mistake. Titus says they
want three things: a win, a title shot, and a superdance. O’Neil and
Jey start, and Titus with a tackle and bark. Jey with a headlock,
but Titus shoves him off and catches him with a flapjack. Young in,
and Titus suplexes him onto Jey. It doesn’t even get one. Young to
the headlock, and he catches Jey with an elbow, but Jey gets a
hiptoss as the Austin crowd lets us know where we are. Jimmy with a
hiptoss of his own and he works the arm. Crowd starts a Houston
Sucks chant as Jimmy gets a flying back elbow for one. Another
armdrag follows, and back to the arm. Jey back in, and he drops an
axhandle on the arm and covers for one. Back to the arm with a
chickenwing as Jey yells “This ain’t Houston!” He’s never going
to live this down, is he? Jimmy in, and Young gets beaten up with a
pair of double elbows for one. Back to the armbar as JBL and Cole
speculate on the University of Texas coaching job. Young with a
Northern Lights out of nowhere for two. He slugs away on Jimmy and
gets a roaring elbow and Greco-Roman throw. Jey tags himself in with
a cradle for one and superkick-throat thrust combo. Samoan Drop
follows, then a hip check on Young. Titus saves, but Jey low bridges
Titus and Young gets superkicked again. Jimmy puts on a Rudolph nose
and flies with a Superfly Splash for the win at 4:52. Not so much a
match as a sheer mockery of Darren Young. *3/4
Titus helps Young up, and everyone makes nice after the match with
the Millions of Dollars dance. Titus has to help Young do it like
Young’s a ragdoll. I got nothing.
We
get a Tale of the Tape on Good Santa and Bad Santa. That will be
next. Cole is marking out for Good Santa, and JBL is cheering for
Bad Santa.
Hey,
the Rock has earned ALL the money in 2013. WWE wins! Sort of. You
know, assuming Dwayne cares about his first job.
Mark
“Good Santa” Henry v. Damien “Bad Santa” Sandow. I’m calling
them Henry and Sandow and you can’t stop me. Both men are introduced
as Santa. Sandow comes to the ring with a giant lump of coal. And
yes, they’re both dressed as Santa. Let’s just say this won’t be a
scientific classic. Sandow charges, but gets slugged down by Henry.
Henry grabs a ginormous present in the corner… and it’s a toilet
bowl. Sandow attacks and gets headbutted. And from there, Sandow
gets the SWIRLIE OF DEATH in the corner. Sandow bails and grabs a
nearby gift – a fire extinguisher. He holds Henry at bay, but
can’t figure out how to operate it. So Henry shows him… about the
way you’d expect. Sandow crawls to the entrance as JBL and Cole
debate whether Santa’s suit is fireproof or Santa himself is. They
fight on the entranceway, where Sandow finds a kendo cane and
destroys Henry AND the decorations at the top. Henry blocks and
headbutts, breaking the stick in half and throwing Sandow down the
aisle. Henry sends Sandow into a tree and pounds him with a present.
Back in, Sandow jumps Henry and pounds away. He gets the
extinguisher, but again doesn’t know the next step. Henry kicks him
down and uses it instead. World’s Strongest Slam (which Cole
re-christens the Sleigh Ride for this occasion) finishes as Christmas
is saved at 3:17. Honestly, they should’ve given this more time like
Orton/Otunga. Henry finds some sleigh bells in a present as JBL
calls Santa a thief because those gifts are for kids, doggone it!
Henry then finds cupcakes and throws them into Sandow’s face for fun.
Eh, it’s a comedy match, what do you want? *
Renee
Young gets to interview CM Punk. She asks about Punk’s plan, and for
once he has one. It’s the middle of the holiday season, and the
Shield’s trying to ruin it. So Punk asks for help – yes, the loner
asked for help. And he asked SANTA for help. And now that Santa
saved Christmas, he gave Punk the gift of John Cena and Big E
Langston. Langston appears and says his gift is a beating for the
Shield. Cena is a little too excited about the Christmas season.
Cena found the Shield’s list, and tonight they’ll give them their
gifts. Reigns needs Big E to knock his teeth in, Rollins needs an
Attitude Adjustment, and Ambrose needs to Go 2 Sleep. Langston:
“Believe in that!”
Well,
since Christmas is saved, I’ll have a Christmas gift for you on the
Blog as part of PG Week on Wednesday as I recap my favorite nostalgia
PPV of all time! No hints, other than it’s not a WrestleMania, so
you can choose whichever one you want for Sunday.
We
the People v. Los Matadores. Zeb Colter wants us to remember one
thing during Christmas: Santa’s an illegal immigrant, sneaking across
our border and taking our jobs. But at least Santa’s only around for
one night every year. And by the way, don’t say “Feliz Navidad”;
it’s “Merry Christmas”. As always, I’m calling them Epico and
Primo. El Torito is white this week. Cole compares him to the
Abominable Snowmonster from Rankin/Bass. Crowd chants that OU stinks
as Cesaro works on Primo with uppercuts. Primo vaults over the
corner and lands on his feet, then flips some more before getting
headscissors. Twice. Cesaro misses a blind charge, but Primo gets
caught and it’s the GIANT SWING OF DOOM. We get to 22 and a half and
Primo has to bail. Even Epico is getting sympathy dizziness. The
two switch off, and Epico is thrown in, cradling Cesaro until Swagger
saves. Epico thwarts a double-team and dives onto Cesaro as Primo
gets a senton cradle for two. Swagger flips Primo, who does a
headstand rana on Swagger followed by the Boss Man Straddle. Up top,
as Epico cuts off Cesaro only to get sent into the barricade. Primo
argues with Cesaro, and Torito gores Cesaro. Primo then gets a
diving crossbody on Swagger for the pin at 3:19. NOSOTROS EL PUEBLO!
*1/4
And
if that translation’s wrong, blame Babelfish.
Another
look at last Friday’s main event to set up tonight’s main event.
Batista:
still coming.
Kofi
Kingston v. Ryback. Someone wanna clean up the entrance? Ryback
opens with a hiptoss and taunt, but Kofi kicks away and takes over.
Kofi works a headlock, but runs into Ryback. Ryback catches Kofi,
but Kofi lands on his feet and gets a dropkick. Corner forearm and
running dropkick and Ryback bails. He argues with the referee, and
Kofi sends him to the floor instead. Ryback looks to leave and is
intercepted by a Kofi somersault plancha. Back in, Ryback sends Kofi
back out. He goes to the outside as the crowd chants Goldberg, and
Kofi’s head hits the apron. Back in, a Hammer Throw to Kofi leads to
stomping. Ryback chops Kofi in the corner as JBL plugs everything he
can think of. Bearhug by Ryback to Kofi as the announcers discuss
what the wrestlers are getting for Christmas. Kofi elbows out but
runs into a stalling suplex. Ryback gets two off of it. To the
second rope, but he dives into Kofi’s feet. Ryback eats elbow on a
blind charge, then a springboard dropkick for two. Soccer kicks to
Ryback follow, then the Boom Drop. He calls for Trouble in Paradise,
but Ryback knows it and hides in the corner only to get pendulum
kicked. Crossbody by Kofi gets two. Kofi vaults onto Ryback, but
Ryback gets a faceplant on the top rope and Meathook. “Happy
Holidays. Get up!” Ryback gets Shell Shock for the win at 5:45.
Man, Ryback’s really fallen into a slump in his in-ring work – he
was BAD on offense. 1/2*
There’s
a main event tonight that you want to watch!
Thursday
on PG Week, I’ll have a little essay about recent off-screen WWE
antics, comparing them to times past and wondering whether hypocrisy
is involved.
Vince
McMahon and a few expendable superstars went to Afghanistan this
week, apparently returning “earlier today”. So R-Truth raced all
the way to the arena to take part in the sing-off? Sorry, I can’t
resist.
So
now the payoff: Bad News Barrett is at ringside to let us know that
he’s gathered money for charity. Thousands of dollars, in fact. But
the bad news: he’s not working for any charity, so the money is all
his. Cole: “Bah Humbug!”
The
Shield reports from an undisclosed location and says Punk has three
thorns in his side. Ambrose says Punk’s pain gives them pleasure.
Rollins then questions Cena and Punk being allies. And why are they
trying, since the outcome is always the same. Reigns lets us know
that Langston’s the big target and in over his head. Tonight, they
will rip everything apart.
PG
Week on the Blog will end next Monday with the final Raw of 2013,
live from Richmond! SmackDown will be pre-taped in DC, my backyard.
I’m very tempted to go, but I couldn’t tell you about it because I
don’t do spoilers. Big Show sold separately.
Main
event: CM Punk, Big E Langston, and John Cena v. Shield. Punk raises
the roof for Langston. Cena gives a kid in the front row a
T-Shirt… which would be more awesome except it appears Santino gave
the same kid a Cobra. Ambrose looks to start against Cena as the
crowd gets their duelling chant on. Cena with a headlock on Ambrose,
adding a shoulder tackle. Rollins tags in to test his luck. He
kicks Cena down, but Cena pounds away and gets a cross-corner whip
into… his comeback? Yup, tackles and spinning slam, but Rollins
rolls out before the Shuffle can get started. Shield call a huddle
before returning. Reigns tags in now and stares down Cena. A
shoving match breaks out, and Cena lands some punches only to run
into a Samoan Drop for two. Reigns corners Cena and stomps away
before tagging in Rollins as we go to break. We return with Rollins
pounding Cena in a neutral corner, but Cena reverses a whip just to
get caught with an elbow and Buff Blockbuster for two. Ambrose in,
and he punches down Cena and gets a Power Drive Elbow for two.
Headbutts and right hands follow. Cena tries to fight out of it, but
gets caught in a sleeper. It’s on for a very long time, as the crowd
gets into it, and Punk tags in DURING THE SLEEPER. Leg lariat to
Ambrose, and Punk follows with a tope suicida. Reigns is knocked
over for good measure, and Punk with a twisting neckbreaker to set up
the corner knee and short-arm lariat. He goes up top, knocking
Rollins off the apron before he can get there, and that allows
Ambrose to send him to the floor. Ambrose with a suplex on the
floor, and he rolls in, begs off to the ref, and rolls back out.
It’s the little things, really. Back in, it gets two. Rollins tags
in and kicks Punk in the back. Rollins points to his black eye (“You
did this to me”) before trying to return the favor. Rollins with a
Hammer Throw, as Cena begs for a tag only to get Rollins’ attention.
Rollins keeps kicking at Punk, stomping him down and taunting the
crowd. Punk sends Rollins into the HBK Corner Flip to get to the
corner, but Ambrose cuts him off with a front chancery. Punk gets to
his knees and tries to get the tag anyway, but Ambrose stops it and
throws him into the corner instead. Reigns tags in and headbutts an
exposed Punk. Reigns shoves around Punk, but it allows Punk to get a
flurry of offense only for him to run into a bearhug. Punk elbows
out… only for Reigns to turn it into a spinebuster for two.
Leaping elbowdrop gets two. Rollins tags in, and he hooks a
bodyscissors. Cena leads a Let’s Go Punk chant as Punk elbows out of
Rollins’s grip. Rollins charges but gets back suplexed, and now it’s
time for a hot tag. Ambrose knocks Cena off the apron to prevent it,
which allows Langston to distract the referee and Reigns to steamroll
Cena. Ambrose (somehow the legal man) stands over a prone Punk, then
looks at Langston all alone in the corner. Ambrose pulls Punk up
only to get a roundhouse kick to make him dizzy. Reigns cuts off the
hot tag (BARELY), but his blind charge airballs and NOW Langston
FINALLY gets the hot tag. Langston destroys Rollins and Reigns,
sending the latter out of the ring and hitting the former with a
Greco-Roman throw. Ambrose misses Langston and hits Rollins, and
Langston gets the Ultimate Splash on both men. The STRAPS ARE DOWN,
but Rollins tags in Ambrose. Ambrose runs into the Big Ending, but
Rollins dropkicks Ambrose on top, Cena saves. Rollins dives into an
AA, but Reigns spears Cena to stop it. Punk off the top to knock
down Reigns as Rollins and Punk are dumped. Ambrose taunts, but
Langston scoops him up for the Big Ending, but the Shield all attack
en masse for the DQ at 16:00 or so. They set up the Triplebomb, but
Cena pulls Reigns away and throws him into the barricade. Langston
bowls over Ambrose and Rollins, who get AA/GTS in stereo. Play ALL
the face music (Cena, then Punk, then Big E) to end as we all
celebrate. ***1/4
FINAL
THOUGHTS:
This
was basically a house show, since I think Vince was betting on this
show being poorly watched due to the holidays. If that’s the case, I
can’t hold anything against anyone. There was no angle advancement
tonight, and the matches didn’t really matter that much. The only
real thing you need to know is Fandango and Langston will meet next
week in an I-C title match.
So if
you didn’t watch tonight, you didn’t miss anything, and we all knew
you wouldn’t miss anything. On the other hand, I had fun watching,
so does that count for something?
STATS:
MATCH
TIME: 69:35 over nine matches
BEST
MATCH: The Wyatt six-man
WORST
MATCH: Kofi/Ryback
NIGHT
MVP: Fandango
FINAL
SCORE: N/A. No need to rate this one, since it’s basically a house
show. If you get a chance to find the whole show on YouTube and have
a few hours to spare, enjoy. Otherwise, catch what you want.
Stay
tuned all week as I fill the Blog with content! I’ll be back
tomorrow with a What If as we begin PG Week! Merry Christmas,
everyone!

A+ Match of the Day

Hope the BOD Universe had a great weekend and those of you celebrating the holidays finished up all of your shopping.

I was thinking about all the negativity surrounding Triple H these days (I’m just as guilty as anyone) and got to thinking that it wasn’t always like this. HHH used to be really good and used to do a very good job of giving guys the rub.

Case in point, Chris Jericho had been hanging around the WWF for close to a year and while he had been doing some good stuff with Angle and Benoit and had even been given the title for about 5 minutes on a RAW, Jericho had yet to have that first real defining match in his WWF career. Well at Fully Loaded 2000 it happened as Jericho took on HHH in a last man standing match. It was a tremendous, bloody, brutal classic that took Jericho to the next level and set up his future success in the sport.

So enjoy it for the first time or enjoy watching it again, HHH-Jericho, Last Man Standing.

BoD Daily Update

Batista Update


The current plans for Batista include him wrestling on TV and at house shows, as well as appearing in storylines after WrestleMania.

Credit Mike Johnson, PWInsider.com

WWE.com RAW Preview


http://www.wwe.com/shows/raw/2013-12-23/five-point-preview-26172556

American Wolves Update


As of now, there has not been word that the Wolves (Davey Richards & Eddie Edwards) have signed with the WWE. This is after both guys made their farewell at a recent PWG show, stating that they were heading to “Orlando.”. TNA is apparently high on both guys.

Credit Mike Johnson, PWInsider.com



WWE.com Article on “Top Ten Shocking Tag Breakups


http://www.wwe.com/classics/classic-lists/10-shocking-tag-team-breakups

Dave’s Updated Rasslemania Rumorz

So according to the radio show this morning, we are WAY off in our pointless speculation. Current direction until they change their mind again:

John Cena against someone in the undisputed main event. Not Hulk Hogan. Dave has no idea who is even left to book for the spot, but WWE feels Cena is the guy and people will buy the show based on him being on top.

Brock Lesnar v Undertaker

Royal Rumble winner Batista v WWE champ Randy Orton

HHH v Vince's guy

Bryan and Punk probably doing something.

Boy, that lineup sure makes you wanna run out and buy the Network, huh?

Random blogness

Scott, hope all is well.  Thought I'd give you a break from the Bryan/HHH stuff…
I don't think I've EVER seen you give your opinion on the streak… Should it be ended?   If so, would you end it in Takers last match, end it to put over the heir apparent (guy like Reigns), or end it to set up a huge rubber match (like have Cena/Taker split the first two and then build to a rubber match in Takers final WM match)? Or would you keep it in tact for whatever value is in that?

The value in the streak is chasing it, not actually ending it for whatever theoretical rub that Undertaker might give a guy, since they'd just fuck it up anyway and have someone else beat the Streak-Killer so as to try and get everyone over and thus get no one over.  Plus once you've taken that genie out of the bottle, you can't just build up another 20 year run of some guy, so why even take the chance?  On a related note…

I must have missed this somewhere, but could you please explain why UT-Cena is so desired for WM? I mean, we assume UT goes over because Streak, but then why do we want Cena not to go over at WM? I mean, yeah, suspense booking and all, and Cena doesn't NEED to go over, but what's the point?
It's desired because it's one of the last big matches we've never seen on that level, and one of the last ones where the result would be in doubt enough for people to suspend their disbelief.  Plus it would be a great fucking match and one I would pay money to see.  

Bret Hart Question

> Hi Scott,

>

> Quick question. Did Vince want Bret to leave in 97? I know he signed him to that deal and then told him he couldn't afford to pay him. So did he want Bret to leave? I don't understand that part.

Vince was very clear about wanting Bret to leave for WCW instead of paying him that money. The whole thing came across to me as a passive aggressive way to move Bret out.

WWF Championship Wrestling July 20th, 1985

July 20, 1985
Your hosts are Bruno Sammartino and Vince McMahon.

This week’s main event will be Don Muraco vs. Ricky Steamboat. Also, we will see a clip of Tito Santana defeating Greg Valentine for the Intercontinental Title in a Steel Cage Match. Plus, Terry Funk, Adrian Adonis, Uncle Elmer, and the Killer Bees are all in action.

Steve Lombardi & Ron Shaw vs. Killer Bees
The Bees theme song is pretty crappy, generic whiny rock music. Bruzell uses his speed to take advantage of Lombardi. The Bees then use quick tags and double-teams to isolate Lombardi. Shaw tags but Blair hits an elbow smash then works the arm. They have a major miscommunication during a snapmare spot then Freddie Blassie joins the announcers after we are told that he is in the lead for the “Manager of the Year” Award. Lombardi tags and shortly after that, Blair puts him away with a top rope sitout splash (3:03). And I guess to go along with the awful music, the camera uses a freeze frame as the Bees perform a leaping high-five, making them look incredibly lame.
Thoughts: The crowd reacted favorably to the Bees, who debuted their bee jackets and tights. They were good in the ring and having another established team on the face side of the roster is a good thing at this time. 
WWF Update with Lord Alfred Hayes. They are debuting a brand new set and desk with the WWF logo, along with new music. The subject this week is Tito Santana and how he overcame an injured leg to win the Intercontinental Title. We are shown a clip of him in a TV squash.
A WWF Magazine Plug airs, with a feature on “Hulk Hogan’s Rock ‘n’ Wrestling.”
Gary Starr vs. Adrian Adonis w/Bobby “The Brain” Heenan
Adonis is handcuffed to the briefcase and before the match, Heenan handcuffs it to himself. Adonis has gained a lot of weight since returning. He takes down Starr and drops several elbows. He then gives Starr a sleeper hold while grinding his knuckles into the side of his head and he gets the win after Starr passes out (2:57).
Thoughts: Not much of a match. Adonis could still actually move around well at this point but that would be coming to an end soon. 
Freddie Miller is plugging the August 3rd show at the Boston Garden. Don Muraco comes out and lets us know that he won the “King of the Ring” tournament and now wants to be known as the “eliminator.” He will be teaming with Fuji to take on Ricky Steamboat & Junkyard Dog. Muraco was ridiculous on interviews but always entertaining. 
Doc Butler vs. Uncle Elmer w/Hillbilly Jim
Butler lands a dropkick and Elmer doesn’t budge, drawing a big laugh from Vince. Elmer does a wiggle as Butler bounces off of him a few times then Elmer puts him away with a leg drop (1:18). After the match, Elmer tries to pose like Jim and Vince laughs like an idiot. They then both help up Butler.
Thoughts: Elmer was horrendous in the ring but the fans were still buying into the act. 
Freddie Miller is now with Ricky Steamboat. He cuts a generic promo about his upcoming match at the Boston Garden
Terry Funk vs. Jose Luis Rivera
Funk backs Rivera into the ropes. He elbows him down then takes him down with a shoulder block. Rivera hits a backdrop and fires away in the corner. Funk comes back with a suplex then tosses him to the floor, as you can hear Rivera hit the guardrail. Funk follows him out and hits an atomic drop and when Rivera gets back into the ring and lands a few punches but Funk grabs his hair. Rivera fucks up a spot completely and they repeat it as Funk catches Rivera on his shoulders then drops him throat first on the rope. Funk then puts him away with the sleeper (3:43).
Thoughts: Funk was great here. He was also such a different type of heel than anyone else on the roster too. 
Piper’s Pit with guest Capt. Lou Albano. Piper calls Albano one of the biggest pigs he has ever seen in his life. Albano warns him not to touch him then Piper taunts him. Orton holds Albano down and as things heat up, Windham & Rotundo come out. Piper said that they haven’t fought anyone as they challenge Piper & Orton to a match.
We are shown some footage of the Steel Cage Match that Tito Santana defeated Greg Valentine for the Intercontinental Title. Does a full length copy of that match exist?
Ricky Steamboat vs. Don Muraco w/Mr. Fuji
Muraco attacks Steamboat before the bell. Steamboat fights back with his “martial arts” and does a pose to fire up the crowd. He lands some more kicks and chops until Muraco catches him with a powerslam. Muraco dodges a charge then both men trade chops. Fuji tries to interfere but it fails. Steamboat hits Muraco with a flying chop but Fuji is back and ties a strap around Steamboat’s neck for the DQ (2:27). Steamboat then gets tossed over the rope as they hang Steamboat. Muraco whips Steamboat with Fuji’s belt then Tito and JYD run out for the save.
Thoughts: Awesome segment and a great way to start off a feud. They can never do the hanging angle nowadays but it looked awesome here. 
Miller is backstage with Paul Orndorff, who talks about his match in Boston against Roddy Piper. He can understand how people hate him and says that Boston has been behind him for a long time because they have respect, unlike Piper. He also claims that Piper doesn’t know who is own father is and puts over Boston before the interview ends.
In action next week will be Greg Valentine, Randy Savage, Iron Sheik & Nikolai Volkoff, Tito Santana & Pedro Morales, and Junkyard Dog & George Steele. Plus, an appearance by Paul Orndorff.

Final Thoughts: Decent show. The kickoff of the Steamboat/Muraco feud was the highlight and we got to see a clip of Tito regaining the IC title. The tease of a Windham & Rotundo vs. Piper & Orton feud was fun too. 

QOTD: MATT HAYDEN

By Gawd, a wrestling QOTD!

Send suggestions to: [email protected]

This was sent in by Matt Hayden…

General consensus seems to be that Roman Reigns is definitely gonna get the rocket push. We all know that timing is often everything with these things, and pushing a guy too fast, or waiting too long, can mess with his heat or even cause the push to fail. 


My question is: if you were booking the Reigns ascension to the top, what’s the general gameplan and timeline you’d follow? How soon do you do the Shield split? Does he feud with Ambrose first? Do you give him a long run and a variety of feuds with the IC/US belt? When do you plan on having him regularly wrestle in main events, and, ultimately, capture the world title? Given that it seems Reigns may get to showcase himself in the Rumble, I thought now would be a good time to ask the BoD how they’d proceed with the Reigns push from here.


My only stipulation is that my question assumes the push WILL happen, so answers like, “I wouldn’t push him at all, I’d strap the rocket to Ambrose instead!” don’t cut it.