Random Match of the Day: Dibiase/Andre v. Hogan/Bigelow

I think the blog would really appreciate this rare match featuring World Champion Ted DiBiase / Andre the Giant vs. Hulk Hogan / Bam Bam Bigelow.  http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x3iy7g_hulk-hogan-bam-bam-bigelow-vs-andre_sport?search_algo=2#.UOiRk-TLTbg

Sweetness.  For those who don’t know, this is the only existing footage known of Ted Dibiase with the WWF World title following the Main Event in 88. 

Quick question

Hey, Scott.  I'm a fan of TNA, in part due to the idea that competition breeds better wrestling programming (a sentiment I know you've expressed before).  This summer TNA really was putting out a quality product, and I think for the most part most of their stuff is enjoyable.  Which brings me to Aces and 8's.  You've been killing this angle for a while, and as much as I want it to work, I have to concede, it doesn't.  Rather than concentrate on what they could have done I was wondering what could be done.  My challenge to you is to book TNA out of this mess and salvage the angle; is there a way?  

Nope.  They need to have Sting or whoever run through these goofs at the next available PPV, unmask them all, and then have them ride off into the sunset.  The entire group has been comprised of hasbeens or jobbers thus far, and there's no one on the horizon (D-Lo, Brisco, Garrett) who is going to redeem this thing and make people take them seriously.  Especially since they lose every match.  I know TNA has a hard-on for decompressed storytelling and making sure they do EVERY BEAT of their storyline exactly when they planned it, but it's time for some damage control with this shit.  Have Dixie just fire them all and go scorched earth with it.

This Week on the PTB Podcast

Welcome to This Week in the PTB Podcast!

Episode 186: 2012 Year in Review

In this new episode of the PTB Podcast, Graham Cawthon joins Scott & Justin to review the 2012 Year in Wrestling. They give their votes for the Best and Worst of the Year and combined with the votes of the Nation, we decide the Winners of the prestigious PTB Year in Review Awards.

Episode 187: Suburban Commando

In this new episode of the PTB Podcast, Scott, Justin & Andrew Flanagan settle into the PTB Man Cave and fire up the 1991 classic, Suburban Commando for a live review. Starring Hulk Hogan, Christopher Lloyd & Shelly Duvall, this movie will cause a lot of laughs…and tears.

So, kick back and fire up the newest episode of PTB…At the Movies!

www.placetobe.podbean.com


www.bigelow34.proboards.com

Coming this Week:

– King of the Ring 1998 Vintage Vault

– Interview with James J. Dillon

Waiting for the Trade – Wynonna Earp

Waiting for the Trade

by Bill Miller

The Complete Wynonna Earp

by Beau Smith

collects Wynonna Earp 1-5, Wynonna Earp: Home on the
Strange 1-3 and a story from Tales of Terror.

 Why I Bought This: This is roundabout so bear with me. From 1995 – 2000 Fleer produced a
card game called Overpower that featured characters from Marvel, DC and Image
that to this day is still one of the most fun games I’ve ever played. The rules
of the game involved teaming four characters to make a team; however there was
a 76-point cap on team-building–characters had values between 16 and 23,
making four 19’s the average. Captain America was a 20-point character
and most of his ideal teammates were 19 or 20 points as well usually requiring
a 17-pointer to make a legal team. Wynonna Earp was the 17-point character that
best complimented Cap’s game mechanics, so consequently I ended up playing her
card (which being the 90s was also a foil-enhanced promo card that looked
pretty damn neat) on my team quite a bit even though I had never read a comic
she had appeared in. From time to time I’d try to find her in a back issue bin
just to see who the hell she was but to no avail (probably because she got
cancelled after five issues). My curiosity persisted because her basic premise
on paper has the potential to be quirky-fun—she is a descendent of Wyatt Earp
who works for a secret government law enforcement agency tasked to deal with
the supernatural and consequently ends up fighting vampires and mummies while
dressed like a cowboy even though it’s the 20th century. Lo and
behold a decade later you can find anything on the Internet: including this
trade paperback discounted well below cover price at MyComicShop.com, who gives
free-shipping at $50. One day I was close to that number and figured why the
hell not give Wynonna Earp a try after all these years.

The Plot: Wynonna
Earp, descendent of Wyatt Earp, is tasked by the U.S. government to crack down on
supernatural activity. This is a collection of several different stories that
ultimately sees her face just about every classic monster archetype by the time
it is done.

 

Chapter 1 – We open in
flashback to five years ago when police officer Wynonna Earp intervenes in a
hostage crisis in Arizona
on the night of the full moon. She unloads her pistol on the perp only for him
to pop back up and claim to have known her ancestor despite looking like he’s
only 30-years old. They fight and eventually she has to decapitate him with a
meat cleaver to get him to stay dead. Government agents arrive on the scene and
put the body and its head in two different morgue vans. The next day Wynonna is
approached by U.S. Marshalls and clued in that supernatural monsters are real
and the government established a sub-agency within the U.S. Marshalls Office
to deal with it since the administration of Teddy Roosevelt. She is offered a
chance to join up, thus becoming a U.S. Marshall much like her famous ancestor.

            Flash forward to present time (1995 publication date) in San Francisco where Earp
is dressed in a remarkably skimpy costume for a law officer and there is
another hostage situation. She takes over for the FBI since the perp is again
supernatural, although what the hell he’s supposed to be is beyond me. He looks
like your typical 1990s Wolverine/X-men villain with brown spiky skin and big
claws. Anyway Earp walk in the room and casually shoots him while he’s holding
a female hostage, and then decks the hostage since she knows the perp’s M.O. is
to use his current girlfriend to stage fake hostage situations whenever he’s
almost caught.
    Earp’s next assignment takes her to San Diablo, New
Mexico where a group of vampires are synthesizing
their own blood into a drug called Hemo that is “five times more intoxicating
than Heroin” and causes violent rampages far worse than PCP as the users
eventually start to become vampires themselves. We meet the head vampire, Bobo
Del Ray: who is drawn a lot like the last monster with brown scaly skin, long
tongue and large claws along with his fangs and the oversized musculature
popularized by Cable and Venom in the 90s that just about every Image Comic
ripped off. Anyway Bobo disembowels some delivery boy because the delivery bay
didn’t like Mayberry (with Andy Griffith) and that’s his favorite show. We see
some lesser vampires rob a blood bank while two Native American Indians look on
under the full moon. Wynonna’s plane arrives in New Mexico for the not exactly a cliffhanger
ending.

Chapter 2 – Wynonna marches
into a dive bar, beats up the bartender, pulls out her guns and arrests
everyone in the bar claiming it’s a front for Hemo selling all while observed
by a vampire in his bat-form (although like in the film Van Helsing their bat-form is really a full-sized humanoid bat
hybrid). Said vampire reports to Bobo, who instructs him to take bring Wynonna
to him. Two vampires then attack her in her hotel room but she fights them off
hand to hand before using a sword to decapitate them. When his men don’t come
back, Bobo sends a larger vampire posse after Earp; who by now is on her horse
and riding off to take the fight into the desert. This time three vampires get
the drop on her and seem to have the upper hand when the two Native Americans
from last issue show up and transform into werewolves and tear two of the
vampires apart giving Earp time to pull out a machine gun that shoots wooden
stakes. With the vampires dead, she stands off with the werewolves.

Chapter 3 – The werewolves
resume human form and explain they are registered with the government as bounty
hunters, so Earp is all like “that’s cool.” The werewolf and vampire clans are
at war (ala Underworld) so Earp is
willing to let them tag along for the big fight. Bobo meanwhile reacts to his
second posse not returning either, and heads into town with his entire vampire
army and initiates a massacre. Earp and friends arrive in town guns ablaze
before Bobo attacks her one-on-one. They trade punches while the werewolves mop
up the vampire underlings, until Earp attaches a bomb to Bobo’s arm and blows
it off. Then she pulls out a knife and stabs him a bunch until he casts some
spell to invoke a demon and grows into a giant. This just makes him a bigger
target for the stake guns and when she throws some holy water in his mouth he
melts.

Chapter 4 – Mobsters in Russia, Japan,
China, Italy and Columbia
have all been found dead next to bloody Egyptian symbols. Now the mobs of NYC
are meeting to make sure it doesn’t happen to them and the government is
sending Earp to stake it out and make sure there isn’t a supernatural element
to the killings. We meet the Egyptians and they have a mummy working for them
(revealed in a very nice looking splash page) named Raduk. We meet the various New York mobsters
including head mobster Don Vito, burly bodyguard Guido, and head of security
Nicholas Deffero. Meanwhile Wynonna, ever a fan of the direct approach, waltzes
into a club that is a front for the Egyptian mob and throws her badge around
until the club owner Amir meets with her. She questions him on various mystic
mumbo jumbo and he feigns ignorance but offers to meet with her at the Egyptian
museum the next day. We learn Wynonna and Deffero have a romantic past. The
next night the mummy attacks Don Vito at an Italian restaurant using super
strength to mow through his generic thugs and kidnap him. At the museum Amir
lures Wynonna to the mummy. She gets captured and he announces he intends to
mummify her.

Chapter 5 – Amir has a magic
knife that he says will resurrect Tiamat when he uses it on Earp, who is now
bandaged like a mummy. First however Amir has to cut symbols into Don Vito for
no adequately explained reason. Deffero and Guido arrive and begin shooting.
They scatter the Egyptians but the mummy is immune to bullets. Deffero frees
both hostages and hands out guns while the mummy out strengths Guido. They
split into groups of two, Earp of course with her former lover. They banter
until they encounter the mummy again; bullets are still useless but Deffero
(with a last minute save by Guido) buys time for Earp to prepare a mix of Tanis leaves that immobilize
the mummy so she can decapitate it. And then Earp and the good mobsters shoot
all the evil mobsters in the head. Afterwards Earp and Deffero go on date.  She tells him it will never work out between
them because he’s a crook but that doesn’t stop her from taking him to bed thus
bringing the original Image 90’s series to an end.

Chapter 6 – (Now published by
IDW in 2003). In 1929 Curly Bill, Brocius, Ike Clanton and Tom McLaury
(apparently all real outlaws killed by Wyatt Earp) return from the grave and
kill Earp in a hotel. Apparently they made a deal for immortality in Hell predicated
on ending the Earp family line. They’ve been killing family members and saving
Earp for last but what they don’t know is he has a secret child with an
actress, which of course will lead to Wynonna Earp. Back in the present, Earp
is battling zombie mailmen led by the fabulously named Postmonster General. She
uses the usual combination of headshots and flamethrowers to deal with them.
Back in California,
we learn the immortal outlaws set up the whole zombie thing to take out Wynonna
since they are now aware of her. They decide to call in another contingency
plan to deal with her.

Chapter 7 – In West Virginia one of the
outlaws is sticking a bag of hairy creatures under an airplane. Back in LA two
more of the outlaws and a random Bigfoot kill some mobsters. Cut to Earp on a
plane when suddenly hillbilly gremlins show-up mostly eating the wings,
although one sneaks inside and eats a stewardess. Earp and an inexperienced male
field agent find two more gremlins in the cockpit having killed the pilot and
sabotaged the controls. Earp tasers one of them which causes it to explode,
then takes the other hostage and forces it to teleport her and the other agent
to the ground. Meanwhile the Outlaws notice gray hairs and weight gain as their
immortality is wearing off when they get word the gremlins failed and Earp is
in Arizona.
She meets with her superiors who inform her there is a monster conspiracy
against her.

Chapter 8 – The outlaws
decide to arrange a trap for Earp in Tombstone.
They have a sorceress named Mimi throw up a big glowing force field to both
keep regular law enforcement out and get her attention. Earp peaces together
what is going on with the outlaws and their immortality. She calls in her
werewolf bounty hunter friend from the first story arc as back-up. Some dude named
Smitty, who is apparently her Q, gives her some fancy guns that can kill
anything immortal and a sword made of metal from the Roswell crash. He’s also outfitted the
gremlin (Bob Earl) from the last issue with an internal bomb so they can get
him to cooperate and teleport them through the force field. Finally they are
joined by another buxom female marshal Holly Day. Both Earp and the outlaws
dress in traditional cowboy gear and its time for the showdown at high noon.
Earp dispatches some minor demons with her guns and generic thugs with her
sword as the spirit of Wyatt Earp shows up to watch over her. Three werewolves
prepare to attack her but then one of them turns on the other two and its
bounty hunter dude saying he snuck in with the rest of the monsters and no one
noticed. The five heroes dispatch various underlings and then Wynonna takes out
the sorceress with one punch so it comes down to a five on five shoot out at
the OK Coral (literally). The heroes of course win with their immortal killings
guns although Holly takes one in the chest and Smitty takes one in the leg; the
werewolf also takes several shots but it doesn’t bother him much. The last
outlaw (I think Ike Clanton) shoots at Earp point blank but his bullets
mystically miss as we see Wyatt Earp take possession of her body. He reveals
himself as he (she/they) shoots Clanton in the head and then departs Wynonna’s
body. Johnny Ringo (I assume another real life outlaw foe of Wyatt Earp’s)
arrives and reveals himself as the mysterious leader of this whole thing, and
Wynonna finishes him off on her own. She then has a moment with her famous
ancestor’s ghost, who gives her his approval to carry on his legacy and fades
into the ether. She then tends to her wounded allies and we learn Holly is also
an immortal. Wynonna vows to make good on Wyatt’s legacy.

Chapter 9 – In Black Crow, Kansas a farmer is
killed by a mysterious something with a scythe one night. Earp arrives to
investigate and the sheriff fills her in on a haunted wheat field —there have
been five murders in the wheat and with each murder the wheat grows taller;
also farm/electrical equipment won’t work within 150-feet of the field. She does
some research and learns a family was murdered here 100 years ago. That night
she and the sheriff search the field and find an evil scarecrow. Bullets don’t
work and in a humorous scene Earp questions it on its back story by running
through all the horror clichés from ghost of the 100-year-old murder victim to
children of the corn to ancient Indian burial ground before realizing he’s just
a living scarecrow; at which point she casually sets him on fire and ends the
story.

Critical Thoughts: This a middling collection of stories at best, although the one
positive is it gets better as it goes.

The first story is frankly
terrible and really fits the worst parts of every cliché about year one Image
comics to a tee: it’s all big art, big guns and mild gore with zero
characterization. The protagonist has no personality at all in this story (and
really that barely improves throughout). It feels like Smith named her after
Wyatt Earp and figured that was all he had to do to establish character. But
that assumes all readers know what Wyatt Earp is like; and if you’re like me
all I know about him is he existed and he had two movies released in the same
year in the 90s neither of which I bothered to watch. I really think a key
chapter is missing in this story, and that’s a “Year One” mission. We see Earp
encounter the supernatural for the first time and get recruited and then BAM it’s
five year later and she’s casually shooting vampires and spiked mutants.
Where’s the story where she learns how to fight the supernatural or even reacts
to the fact the supernatural is real? Heck why is there no supporting cast at
all? She’s really nothing more than boobs with a gun in that first story.

The second story is a slight
improvement. The villains have an actual plan; albeit not a very good one. We
have a semblance of supporting characters with the mobsters caught in the
middle—although the romance feels kind of shoe-horned from left-field and
consequently falls flat. The big mobster bodyguard Guido demonstrates snippets
of actual personality in his loyalty to his boss and a few humorous asides.
Even the Image art style works a lot better in this story as the splash pages
in this one are the best in the issue. Still it’s not a very good story especially
since you could take all the mob elements out and still have the same story
about Egyptians trying to resurrect Tiamat since it’s never clear why they are
targeting mobsters to do whatever the hell it is they are doing. The ultimate
crux of the plan involves sticking the monster’s spirit in Wynonna’s body,
which you think the villains could find 1,000 different other ways to lure some
woman into their trap that don’t involve pissing off heavily armed gangsters.

The IDW relaunch proves to be a huge
improvement for the series. We get a lot more monsters per issue and many of
them have the zany attitude I expected when hearing the premise of this series.
We also finally meet some of Wynonna’s fellow agents. I for one always like a
good Q scene in the Bond films so ripping that aspect off and giving her
specific weapons for specific supernatural threats is a big improvement over
just having her decapitate every type of monster each issue like the Image
series did. While I’m not really invested in cowboy lore, creating villains
that have an actual personal connection with the hero is an improvement over
the monster of the month approach in the first five chapters. Finally if you
are going to build the series around her connection to Wyatt Earp as her chief
selling point-characterization then a story that explicitly strengthens that
lineage was definitely needed. Her goodbye with Wyatt is the only time we see
any emotion from the protagonist in the entire trade. I still wouldn’t call
this great story, but it’s both tonally and narratively light years better than
the Image stuff and it has some enjoyable moments.

The last story is a short
funny throw-away and works quite well on that level. Again I think this title
is better served by having a little deliberate silliness in it. Having Wynonna
be in on the joke gives her a little more personality too, something she sorely
lacks in the early stories.

Grade D+.  There’s nothing here anyone needs to read, but it is something
different than the usual superhero fare that dominates the medium and sometimes
variety is nice. Maybe if you enjoy westerns or crime stories more than I do it
might be your cup of tea. And while the quality to start is terrible, the book
shows continuous improvement with every story arc. I still think the premise
has more potential than what I’ve seen here, so who knows maybe one day I’ll
grab the second trade on the cheap; but as for this collection, to use Scott’s
terminology, it’s a mild recommendation to avoid.

“Part-Timer” Another Way of Saying “Special Attraction”?

Scott,


Long-time reader, first-time e-mailer.

When you posted the Piper/McGraw match, one of the best aspects was that Piper hardly wrestled on free TV, making a Piper jobber match seem like a can't-miss segment. Many commentators pointed to how a Cena/Ziggler match or a Sheamus/Big Show match, for example, aren't going to draw on PPV when we get those matches (or a tag team version) on TV every other Raw. In short, there's nothing from the current crop of stars that seems "special" anymore.

If that's the case, why is there so much backlash against "part timers" like Rock, Brock, Triple H, and Undertaker?  Instead of slagging them as "part timers", why not look at them as "special attractions," the modern equivalent of how territory promoters would use someone like Andre the Giant to boost attendance for a few weeks?  After all, Brock's matches obviously helped boost the buy rates of Extreme Rules and SummerSlam 2012 over the 2011 buy rates for the same PPVs, and Rock's match likewise helped Survivor Series 2011 do better than 2010 or 2012.  Seems like smart business to me that if you want to see any of these guys compete, you have to buy the PPV, so WWE is doing the right business move on that part.  Hell, I'm planning on ordering Royal Rumble just to see Rock/Punk and I haven't bought a PPV in ten years.

Of course, since WrestleMania does big numbers anyway it seems foolish to blow all four on that show — especially since Brock's match on a throwaway PPV like Extreme Rules boosted the buy rate by 25%. Also, spreading the group around wouldn't hurt so more wrestlers get the rub.

So which is it — are these guys selfish part-timers or special attractions?

HHH is a selfish part-timer, the rest are special attractions.  
But yeah, obviously I've never been on the side of bitching about Rock and Brock because they're two of my favorite wrestlers of all-time, so I'll take whatever I can get from them.  

Another Vader question

In WCW he was "Big Van Vader". Did WCW own that name or did Leon? 


I'm pretty sure NJPW owned the rights to it and WCW was basically using it under an agreement.  

In the WWF he was "The Man They Call Vader" (technically). Was the WWF afraid that LucasFilm would sue them?

I would imagine so.  If there's anyone more litigious with their trademarks than WWE, it's Lucas.  

By the way, Vader is German for "Father", so maybe the "They" the WWF was referring to is a bunch of his illegitimate kids?

Eh, maybe not… 

Wait, so "Darth Vader" literally means Dark Father?  Isn't that a tad on-the-nose even by George Lucas' standards?  

Smackdown – January 4, 2013

Smackdown
Date: January 4, 2013
Location: Richmond
Coliseum, Richmond, Virginia
Commentators: John
Bradshaw Layfield, Josh Matthews
Reviewed by Tommy Hall
Welcome to the day of
the year where more stuff happens in wrestling than any other.
Whether it be the NJPW supershow or the Fingerpoke of Doom or Foley
winning the title or Hogan debuting on Impact or Bret and Shawn
burying the hatchet, something ALWAYS happens on January 4. Odds are
not much of note will happen tonight, but things in the WWE will pick
up big on Monday when Rock returns. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is
about Orton returning to fight the Shield tonight as Alberto
attacking Big Show after Ricardo got beaten up.
Here’s Orton to open
the show. He says that his new year’s resolution is to become World
Champion again. For some reason Smackdown isn’t his show anymore, so
he’s entering the Royal Rumble. This brings out Sheamus who enters
the Rumble as well. He’s also here to thank Orton for his help with
the Shield on Raw. Orton says that was for himself and now Sheamus
and starts talking about the Rumble again. Sheamus says he knows a
bit about the Rumble since he won it last year. They say they’ll
eliminate each other, so here’s Big Show with something of his own to
say.
The champ says all the
winner of the Rumble gets is a shot at his fist, which is what
Sheamus has gotten every single time they’ve fought. If Orton wants
a shot, that’s fine with him so come take a shot. Cue Cesaro who
makes fun of these bragging Americans. Sheamus says he’s from
Ireland but Cesaro doesn’t really care. Orton says how about this
lazy American comes and RKOs Cesaro. Booker, tag match set, end
opening segment.
Kingston gets his
rematch tonight.
The Miz vs. Heath
Slater
Did Drew always have
that cowboy hat? JBL: “Here comes the air guitar playing version
of the Spirit Squad.” So which one is Dolph Ziggler? Apparently
this is because of 3MB being on MizTV the week before the Slammys.
Feeling out process to start with Miz cranking on Slater’s arm. A
dropkick of all things puts Heath down and Miz works on a headlock.
That stays on for a good while, suggesting this is going to be a long
match.
Miz makes fun of the
air guitar playing and pokes Slater in the eye. I would say it
worked for Roddy Piper but Miz hasn’t acted like Piper in years.
Think back to the time he was champion: he ran his mouth a lot, he
wasn’t the best technical guy in the world, no one could seem to beat
him no matter what, he had a lackey who was better in the ring than
he was, and he somehow kept getting by the top guy in the company.
Sound like any famous kilt wearing wrestlers?
Miz hiptosses Slater
down but McIntyre trips him up to change momentum. Miz has to fight
off the other 3MB guys, drawing an ejection for them and a quick
rollup for two on Slater. We take a break and come back with Slater
pounding away in the corner. Miz fights back so Slater bails again,
only to get clotheslined down again. JBL talks about how important
it was for Miz to team with Cena on Raw. Remember kids: title reigns
from two years ago aren’t as important as a one off tag match that
opens up a New Year’s Eve episode of Raw that no one watched.
Back inside, Miz misses
a charge and his shoulder goes into the post, giving Slater something
to focus on. After escaping a quick arm hold, Miz grabs a sunset
flip for two before having his head kicked off for the same result
for Slater. The sequence works so well that we do the exact same
thing but with a clothesline instead of a kick by Slater. Miz comes
back with a knee to the ribs and a kick to the face for two, only to
have Slater send him into the buckle to stop the comeback.
Slater wraps Miz’s arm
around the post as JBL goes back and forth between praising Slater’s
abilities and blasting his non-existent singing abilities. Miz
suplexes out of a headlock and both guys are down. Slater goes back
to the arm so Miz uses the good elbow to take over again. A
neckbreaker gets two for Heath but Miz shrugs it off and hits his
signature stuff, finishing Slater with the Skull Crushing Finale at
12:22 shown of 15:22.
Rating: C.
My first guess as to why Miz isn’t getting over as a face: it took
him fifteen minutes to beat Heath Slater in a one on one match. That
being said, I’m not going to complain about a match with a decent
story in it and some psychology thrown in. The fact that Slater had
nothing to be able to finish Miz off with didn’t help, but I could
come up with far worse ways to kill time on this show.
We recap Kofi losing
the title on Monday.
Barrett doesn’t want to
talk about losing to Kofi in a gauntlet match on Main Event.
Great
Khali/Hornswoggle/Natalya vs. Primo/Epico/Rosa Mendes
This is an excuse to
show the Mae Young stuff from Raw again. You know, because THAT is
something to be proud of. The girls start things off with Natalya
taking over with ease. Rosa tags in Epico, who gets to fight Khali.
Epico turns around, sees Khali, and tags out to Primo. Khali hits a
big chop and it’s off to Horny for some comedy offense. He hits a
Stunner on Epico but Primo finally takes him down with a shot to the
head. JBL: “Doesn’t PETA have rules against that?” Horny
finally tags Khali, house is cleaned, and the big chop pins Epico at
4:03.
Rating: D.
I feel sorry for Epico and Primo. They aren’t ever going to be the
kings of the tag division, but man alive they deserve better than to
have to sell for Hornswoggle’s offense. This was one of those comedy
matches that was lacking the comedy, but at least it was pretty
short.
Kofi says this isn’t
about momentum because it’s likely his last chance at the title. I
highly doubt that.
Intercontinental
Title: Kofi Kingston vs. Wade Barrett
Feeling out process to
start with Kofi using his speed to escape the power brawling Barrett.
Off to an armbar by the challenger which doesn’t last that long.
Wade bails to the floor but Kofi follows him out and sends him into
the steps to take over again. Back in and a springboard forearm to
the head gets two. The champ sends him into the corner and things
slow down again. It’s rather interesting how the fans seemed to be
WAY more interested in Miz vs. Slater than they are here for a title
match. I’m sure the fans not moving during the Miz match isn’t
noteworthy at all.
We hit the chinlock
which doesn’t last long as Kofi tries some fast rollups for two each.
Barrett gets backdropped to the floor, followed by a dive from Kofi
to take him out. Barrett seems fine to chill on the floor for a
countout while claiming an injury but Kofi will have none of that.
Wade hides in the ropes again as we take a break. Back with Wade
knocking Kingston down with something we didn’t see for no cover.
Back to the chinlock
before Barrett shifts his attack to the ribs, firing off some kicks
and dropping a middle rope elbow for two. Kofi gets placed in the
ropes and kicked to the floor again, drawing what appears to be
legitimate heat from the crowd. Kingston gets back in at nine and
immediately has to block a superplex. The top rope cross body gets
two on Barrett and Kofi wins a slugout.
Kofi loads up another
springboard but Barrett avoids it, only to get caught in the SOS for
two. A BIG running kick to the side of Barrett’s head sets up the
Boom Drop. Kofi loads up Trouble in Paradise but Barrett ducks,
setting off a very hot sequence of near falls for both guys. Winds
of Change (Boss Man Slam) gets two for Wade but Kofi kicks his head
off, sending him out to the floor.
After Kofi finally gets
him back inside, Barrett grabs the rope at two. The place is really
getting into this. Kingston charges into a boot in the corner but
ducks the Bull Hammer, only to jump off the middle rope right into
said Hammer, which retains the title for Barrett at 13:14 shown of
16:44.
Rating: B-.
What is with all this wrestling tonight? That’s two matches out
three that broke fifteen minutes, which is almost unheard of anymore.
Kofi continues to be the guy that can have a good match with anyone
and contrary to some opinions, there is absolutely nothing wrong with
having that role for the next five years for him. Just because he
doesn’t make it to the main event doesn’t mean he’s a failure by any
stretch. Good match here as you would expect from these two.
Layla vs. Tamina
Snuka
Tamina chokes Layla
against the ropes to start. Layla stares at Tamina like an idiot
before getting shoved to the outside. We hit the chinlock as the
crowd is SILENT. JBL makes fun of Josh’s inability to talk to women
as the match is dragging despite only running a minute and a half so
far. Layla makes her comeback and hits a dropkick to the side of the
head before screaming. When you can understand every word she’s
shouting, you might need to do a better job at firing up the crowd.
The bouncing cross body is caught in a slam and the Superfly Splash
gets the pin at 3:05. I think you can figure out the rating by
yourselves.
The Raw ReBound is the
really stupid ending to the show.
Randy Orton/Sheamus
vs. Big Show/Antonio Cesaro
Cesaro and Sheamus
start things off and pound on each other for a bit as you would
expect the two of them to do. Off to Orton for a suplex for two and
here’s Sheamus again. Cesaro gets pounded some more as Big Show
yells instructions to him. Orton comes in and pounds him in the head
for a bit before Sheamus gets another tag. Cesaro finally gets in
some shots to the ribs and there’s the tag to Big Show.
Show puts Sheamus down
and swings at Orton, allowing Sheamus to come back with a shot to the
head. The good guys double clothesline Show to the floor and we take
a break. Back with Sheamus sending Cesaro to the apron for the ten
forearms. Show makes a blind tag and spears Sheamus down as momentum
really shifts for the first time. Cesaro can be heard telling Show
what to do (a recurring theme tonight) as Show gets two off an elbow
drop.
The referee tells Show
to let Sheamus out of the corner, but Show yelling at the referee
allows Sheamus to get in some offense for a change. Show misses a
charge in the corner but comes back with a chokeslam for two. I
guess that’s officially just another big move for Show anymore. The
KO punch misses and Sheamus kicks Show’s head off to put both guys
down.
Double tags bring in
Cesaro and Orton and it’s time for Randy’s finishing seq uence.
Cesaro counters the Elevated DDT and Sheamus tags himself in, much to
Orton’s annoyance. White Noise takes Cesaro down but as Sheamus
loads up the Brogue Kick, Orton comes in with an RKO. Sheamus
reluctantly gets the pin at 10:36 shown of 14:06.
Rating: C+.
Standard main event tag match here but it’s clear that they’re sowing
the seeds for at least the Rumble and possibly an Orton heel turn and
the world title match at Wrestlemania. They didn’t have any actual
contact but they didn’t need to, which is something a tag match like
this is good for. I’m talking about Orton and Sheamus if that wasn’t
really clear.
Sheamus and Orton stare
each other down (not really out of rage) to end the show.
Overall Rating: B.
When you have three matches that are about fifteen minutes each, it’s
hard to say it’s not at least a pretty good show. This is the kind
of stuff that Smackdown can offer as a legit different style from
Raw, as there were zero backstage segments here and almost all
wrestling. The quality wasn’t always great, but it was nice to see a
wrestling show for a change. Good stuff.
Results
The
Miz b. Heath Slater – Skull Crushing Finale
Great
Khali/Hornswoggle/Natalya b. Primo/Epico/Rosa Mendes – Chop to
Epico
Wade
Barrett b. Kofi Kingston – Bull Hammer
Tamina
Snuka b. Layla – Superfly Splash
Sheamus/Randy
Orton b. Big Show/Antonio Cesaro – RKO to Cesaro

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and check out my website at kbwrestlingreviews.com

CM Punk: Streak-buster

> Hello, Scott!  It's your Friendly Neighborhood VintageGamer!
>
> I know the assumption has been that we'd get a CM Punk/Steve Austin match for Wrestlemania.  But if Austin isn't in ring shape or can't go because of his injury, is there any chance that Punk would take a stab at Undertaker's Streak?  Given that Cena's paired with Rock and Lesnar's probably doing a rematch with Triple H, it does leave Punk as the odd man out, doesn't it?
>
> -VINTAGEGamer First up, thanks to everyone offering their support on Facebook over the loss of my smelly but faithful Boston terrier Rebel earlier today.  It's much appreciated. Anyway, this is pretty much the assumption for their plans at this point.  Austin is a complete no-go so yeah, it'll probably be Punk v Taker.  Plus I got namedropped in Will Cooling 's guest column on Meltzer's site so now they better not make me look silly.  Sillier.