Impact Wrestling – May 10, 2018

Impact Wrestling
Date: May 10, 2018
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentator: Josh Matthews

We’re still dealing with the Redemption fallout while also starting the build towards Slammiversary. Tonight’s big deal is Eli Drake cashing in his Feast or Fired briefcase for the World Title shot against Pentagon Jr. You also have Austin Aries roaming around near the title and some other people aren’t far behind. Let’s get to it.

We open with Josh Matthews in the studio talking about Sami Callihan wrecking a recent ceremony in Don Callis’ honor. Apparently Sami is livid at Callis for throwing in the towel to save Eddie Edwards at the WrestleCon show and wanted revenge.

There’s currently a meeting going on regarding Sami’s future. We’ll cut into whatever to let you know the outcome.

It’s off to the ceremony in Toronto with Anthony Carelli (Santino Marella) giving Callis an award. Cue Sami to attack Callis and beat him down while busting him open. Fine angle, but Callis has been on camera around here for less than a month. That’s quite a lot of faith to bet on fans caring about something like this.

The regular opening video talks about Drake vs. Pentagon.

Opening sequence.

Andrew Everett/DJZ vs. LAX

Santana and DJZ start things off with a rather speedy exchange until Ortiz comes in for some double teaming to take over. It’s off to Everett for a failed fireman’s carry gutbuster as Santana is keeping his eyes open for anyone trying to interfere. Santana’s cutter gives Everett two and Josh gives us updates on the meeting: it’s still going on. I’ll take nothing new Josh over nitwit/stupid/self praising Josh. Everett rolls over into a kick to Santana before rolling over to DJZ for the tag.

DJZ sends them together so Ortiz DDTs Santana in that spot that is still so stupidly contrived. A double kick takes DJZ down but a double kick takes LAX down. Everything breaks down and DJZ tornado DDTs Ortiz, only to walk into a Santana superkick. Everett hits a very good looking top rope Asai moonsault to drop Ortiz but Ortiz is up a few moments later for a suicide flip dive. The Street Sweeper is broken up and DJZ rolls Ortiz up for the pin at 8:28.

Rating: B-. This is a good idea as there’s only so much you can do with a two or three team tag division. Everett and DJZ aren’t breaking the mold or anything we haven’t seen before but the division needs bodies right now and there’s nothing wrong with that. LAX’s downward spiral is interesting and I’m kind of curious to see what’s behind the whole thing. Nice match too.

Grado is still waiting on his girlfriend but Joseph Park says he smells a rat. Cue Katie Lea Burchill/Winter (now known as Katarina) name she’s going by now to hug Grado and say she’ll see “James” (Park) later.

Austin Aries wants Eli Drake to win tonight because he knows he can beat him.

Rohit Raju vs. Grado

Before Josh can say it: WHO IS THE DESI HIT SQUAD AND WHY SHOULD I CARE? Raju jumps Grado while he gives Katarina his hat but can’t suplex the rather rotund one. Some running boots to the face in the corner give Raju two and we hit the chinlock. Grado is back with a side slam and a falling splash, which Josh calls unique. That would be true, if Ortiz didn’t do the same thing in the previous match.

We go split screen for a second to show that the meeting is still going. Grado takes too much time with his dancing punches and gets kneed in the face. A swinging fisherman’s neckbreaker gets two but Grado is right back with an elbow to the head and the Cannonball for the pin at 5:39.

Rating: D. I never cared for Grado in the first place and now I’m not sure if he’s supposed to be a heel or a face. By nature he’s a face but if you put a hot manager with anyone, it’s going to make them a heel almost by default. Unless Katarina is with him to stay in the country or just using him or something, I’m not sure I get this.

Joseph Park is the latest X victim. Given that one of his finishers is called Weapon X, Cage is a possible suspect.

Video on Tessa Blanchard, who has wrestling in her blood and has to be the best.

Eli Drake and Scott Steiner are in the back with Drake saying tonight, he becomes the new belt collector. Steiner doesn’t like the idea of Drake saying he’ll do this himself.

Drago vs. Aerostar vs. Taiji Ishimori vs. El Hijo Del Fantasma

Lucha rules and the winner gets a future X-Division Title shot. Now that’s all I ask. Ishimori and Fantasma are sent to the floor in about thirty seconds, leaving Drago and Aerostar to trade covers. The other two replace them in a hurry and a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gets two on Ishimori. A good looking middle rope moonsault to the floor drops Drago and we take a break.

Back with Drago kicking Fantasma in the mask and hitting an ankle scissors to take Fantasma down again. Ishimori comes back in with a Regal roll for two on Drago. All four get back in and Fantasma superkicks Drago down. Ishimori drops Fantasma as well and all four are down for a bit. Drago is sent outside for a dive from Ishimori, followed by a dive each from Fantasma and Aerostar. Back in and Aerostar powerbombs Ishimori into the corner for two but the Thrill of the Kill gives Fantasma the pin on Aerostar for the pin at 16:43.

Rating: C+. This didn’t have the energy or the pace as last week’s six man but thank goodness they did something about giving us a new #1 contender. You can’t have these guys out there doing all kinds of crazy stuff and popping the crowd and not move them up, at least a little bit. Good match here, as you probably expected.

Eddie Edwards goes into the meeting and demands that Callihan not be fired. Management tells him to do what he has to do away from the Impact Zone.

From House of Hardcore in Fort Wayne, Indiana.

Moose vs. Kongo Kong

Joined in progress with Moose hitting a dropkick but getting thrown to the floor. Kong follows him out and whips Moose into the barricade as Josh talks about Callihan and Edwards over and over. Kong’s waistlock doesn’t get him very far so he sends Moose shoulder first into the post. Moose switches to a more simplistic offense by shouldering him down but Jimmy Jacobs comes in with a chair for the DQ at 6:08.

Rating: D. Leave it to Kong to pull the good match streak to a grinding halt. I still don’t care for these matches from outside promotions but at least they have something here where it’s continuing a storyline with people we know. Unfortunately one of those people is Kong and I still have no clue why he’s getting so much time, unless he works for dirt cheap.

KM wants Fallah Bahh to become the best man that he can and we get shots of them screaming into the camera.

Montage of KM training Bahh to make him lose weight while eating various bad food. Bahh passes out.

From Pro Wrestling Noah and if what I can find is correct, this is from June 4, 2017.

Brian Cage vs. Takashi Sugiura

Joined in progress with Cage hitting a delayed vertical suplex, followed by a standing moonsault for two. Josh: “If the Avengers ever needed a new member, and they do after Infinity War, they should get Brian Cage.” That’s getting rather close to a spoiler. Cage hits the apron suplex for two more but Sugiura knees him down and hits some running knees in the corner.

A superplex attempt is broken up but Sugiura snaps off a top rope hurricanrana to put both guys down. There’s a buckle bomb to drop Sugiura and an F5 gets two. A German suplex and running knee give Sugiura the same but Cage blasts him with the Tornado Claw for two more. The Drill Claw is good for the pin on Sugiura at 7:49.

Rating: C. They really couldn’t find another match from within the last ten months and had to go this far back? The World Tour idea is fine but come up with something a little more recent. The match was watchable, though telling me who Sugiura was would have been nice, albeit completely beyond Josh’s capabilities. As someone who doesn’t watch Noah, I have no idea if that was a big, middle of the road or meaningless win for Cage, because I don’t know if Sugiura is an all time great, a midcarder, or a jobber. I’m sure I could find it, but Josh and Impact need to be telling us these things. Why that’s so much to ask, I’m not sure.

From Destination X 2009, Suicide wins the X-Division Title.

Allie is looking in a mirror and has flashbacks to last week. She finds a doll with a note pinned to it and opens it up. While we don’t see what it says, Allie looks a little disturbing when she looks in the mirror, almost like something is trying to take control of her.

Impact Wrestling World Title: Eli Drake vs. Pentagon Jr.

Pentagon is defending and Steiner isn’t here with Drake. They trade catchphrases to start and Drake sends him into the corner to stand on his head. Back to back Sling Blades give Pentagon two as Aries is watching in the back, banana in hand. A powerslam cuts Pentagon off as we’re told that next week, House of Hardcore will present Edwards vs. Callihan in a street fight. At least there’s a storyline reason for going to another promotion this time.

We hit the chinlock for a bit before Pentagon headscissors Drake out to the floor. A superkick to the ribs knocks Drake out of the air and the Codebreaker out of the corner gets two. The Gravy Train doesn’t work and Drake misses a top rope Lionsault, allowing Pentagon to hit the Pentagon Driver for the pin at 7:09.

Rating: D+. Uh, where’s the rest of this match? Pentagon defends against a guy who was World Champion about three months ago and it’s barely hyped up and seven minutes long with a clean finish? We didn’t deserve a little more than that for a match like this? Anyway at least the briefcases are already done instead of having them hanging over our heads like the Money in the Bank briefcases so score one for Impact.

Overall Rating: C+. This show was on a roll in the first hour and then rolled off a cliff in the second with some bad matches and lame ideas that didn’t go anywhere. They’re doing a better job of setting up the other promotions’ matches as they seem to have a point now, at least some of the time. The show was watchable but they need to put it together in a better order to really make things work. That and get a louder bell. Seriously I had to rewind four matches tonight to hear where they started. Get something louder.

Results

Andrew Everett/DJZ b. LAX – Victory roll to Ortiz

Grado b. Rohit Raju – Cannonball

El Hijo Del Fantasma b. Aerostar, Taiji Ishimori and Drago – Thrill of the Kill to Aerostar

Moose b. Kongo Kong via DQ when Jimmy Jacobs interfered

Brian Cage b. Takashi Sugiura – Drill Claw

Pentagon Jr. b. Eli Drake – Pentagon Driver

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