The SmarK Rant for Lucha Underground S01E21–“Uno, Dos, Tres!”

The SmarK Rant for Lucha Underground S01E21

“Uno! Dos! Tres!”

Your hosts are Matt Striker & Vampiro

Dario Cueto is busy polishing a belt, when Big Ryck pops in to introduce us to his boys, Killshot and The Mack. Word on the street is that Dario put a hit on Ryck, and that’s not good for him. So Dario is like “You know, I’m introducing a new Trios title, so how about I let you fellas into the tournament and call it even.” Ryck wisely demands another wad of cash on top of that, and they’re apparently good.

Angelico v. Johnny Mundo

I feel like there will be some flips and kicks. Mundo takes him down and Angelico is more offended by having his hair messed up, and they exchange kicks and fly all over the ring. Yup, this is EXACTLY what I thought it would be. Angelico bails and Mundo follows with the corkscrew dive, but that misses and they bounce all over the railing with parkour until Mundo hits a knee strike on the floor. Back in, that gets two. Mundo gets more spinning kicks and a shining wizard for two. Angelico comes back with a sunset flip for two, and a rollup for two, and they move into a pinfall reversal sequence, but Angelico blocks a sunset flip with a double stomp for two. They slug it out and Angelico wins that with kicks, then ducks a legsweep and gets an enzuigiri for two. Mundo hits him with a springboard kick for two. Mundo misses a moonsault and Angelico gets a knee in the corner and then hits him with a crucifix powerbomb into the turnbuckle for two. Another try, but Mundo hooks the ropes to block it and goes up. Angelico kicks him down and follows with a rana attempt from the top, but Mundo blocks that and hits the End of the World to finish at 7:43. Parkour-riffic! ***1/2

Mientras Tanto, Black Lotus is trained by El Dragon Azteca (the mysterious masked guy who kidnapped her a few weeks back), as she does Kill Bill-esque training in order to get strong enough to avenge her parents’ death and destroy whatever monster is caged up in Dario’s basement.

Johnny Mundo bumps into Alberto El Patron backstage, and they catch up on what’s been going on since WWE, and Patron is like “Oh hey, I saw your match. And here I thought you were doing something different now.” Sick burn, bro.

Dario offers Sexy Star a place in his Trios tournament, and even gives her two partners: Super Fly and Pentagon Jr. She doesn’t appear impressed. I dunno, I’d sure as hell rather be on Pentagon’s side than against him.

Best of 5 Match #4: Drago (1 win) v. Aerostar (2 wins)

Aerostar gets a headscissor takedown for two, but Drago superkicks him and throws kicks in the corner until Aerostar fights back with a springboard dropkick. Drago bails and Aerostar hits a double-jump dive off the ropes, and back in with a sunset flip for two. Springboard splash gets two. Majastral cradle gets two. Aerostar misses a charge and lands on the floor, and Drago hits him with an electric chair into an armbar submission. Aerostar escapes that, but Drago dropkicks him to the floor. Back in, Drago with a powerbomb into a faceplant and he goes up with a corkscrew bodypress, and rolls him up with a crucifix for the pin at 4:34. So we go to SUDDEN DEATH and a fifth match. Too short, but I’m sure the finale will be suitably epic. **1/2

Dario calls Havoc, Angelico and Ivelisse into his office, and he’s frankly disappointed and embarrassed by all of them. So he’s making them a Trios team to hopefully redeem them from being such losers. Although for the record, Havoc wants him to know that he dumped Ivelisse. God, Dario is such a great character.

Trios title tournament: Big Ryck, the Mack & Killshot v. Sexy Star, Super Fly & Pentagon Jr.

Pentagon immediately protests being forced to team with “these two wimps”, but don’t worry, because he’ll just win the tournament by himself. Vampiro gives us a brief history of trios wrestling in Mexico, and Mack takes Pentagon down with an armdrag and does a nice kip up despite looking like JYD. Blind charge misses and Pentagon hits him with the big chop in the corner before Mack comes back with a Pounce for two. Mack throws forearms in the corner, but Pentagon flips over him with a backstabber for two. This sets up the armbar, but Mack escapes to his corner and brings in Killshot. Super Fly tags himself in and dominates Killshot with flying moves, and Sexy Star works a headlock on him. Killshot takes over with chops (“That’s not right!” yells some guy at ringside) but Sexy takes him down with a headscissors for two. Ryck comes in and just hits everyone, and then tosses Sexy onto her partners and orders his men to follow with dives onto them. Back in, Sexy sneaks in on the top rope and hits Ryck with a crossbody for two to break up his dive attempt. Ryck pounds on Pentagon as Striker notes that “the pace comes to a screeching halt when Ryck comes into the ring.” What a terrible way to get a match over. Pentagon dropkicks him to the floor, and Killshot comes back in and hits a weird tombstone into a faceplant for two. Pentagon gets the package piledriver for two. He superkicks Killshot into the corner and actually works with Sexy Star, elevating her into a rana, into a frog splash from Super Fly from two. Great sequence. Ryck breaks it up and chokeslams Super Fly for two, and fights to the floor with Pentagon. Back in, Killshot hits Super Fly with a diamond cutter and Mack gets a brainbuster for the pin at 10:57. Mack looked AWESOME here and instantly got himself over, but holy crap is Ryck terrible and completely out of place at this point. He just dragged the match to a halt every time he was involved. **1/4 Pentagon decides to take his frustration out on Super Fly’s arm, but Sexy Star saves her partner and we’re out.

More of the Mack, please! I really like that they wrapped up a bunch of stuff last week, and then it’s BOOM, onto the next focus, which is the Trios tournament.