The SmarK Rant for Mid-Atlantic Championship Wrestling–01.09.82

The SmarK Rant for Mid-Atlantic Championship Wrestling – 01.09.82

Taped from Charlotte, NC

Your hosts are Bob Caudle & David Crockett

Sandy Scott kicks the show off in his usual electrifying manner, introducing the equally electrifying Terry Taylor, who is anxious to roll up his sleeves and jump into the action. Meanwhile, Sgt. Slaughter stops by to complain that no one has answered his challenge since Blackjack Mulligan Jr. failed, so the challenge is OVER and he wants his $1000 back. However, lawyers have put an injunction on the money, so he can’t have it back yet. What kind of bullshit is that? IT’S HIS $1000! Why must this promotion continually screw over a real American hero like Sgt. Slaughter?! I hope he cobra clutches the shit out of some jerk like Blackjack Mulligan Jr. this week.

Doug Vines & Mike Miller v. Jake Roberts & Blackjack Mulligan Jr.

The babyfaces control Miller in the corner with headlocks while Caudle continues to put over Rookie of the Year Terry Taylor, who is not only good-looking, but clean cut as well. Good to know. Slaughter joins us at ringside while Vines gets worked over by Mulligan and a kneedrop gets two. Miller comes in and takes Roberts down with a headlock, while Slaughter concedes that he’ll give Mulligan another shot at the money, but only one more time, and then he’s taking his money and going home. He should stipulate that Mulligan needs to get a damn haircut and shave off the moustache first. Damn hippies. Vines sends Jake into the turnbuckle and works a facelock while Sandy Scott has to chase off Slaughter. Miller drops an elbow for two, but Roberts finally gets a hot tag to Mulligan, and he finishes Vines with a bulldog at 8:22. That was a needlessly lengthy squash, but they needed a backdrop for Slaughter’s rant, I guess. 0 for 1.

Billy Robinson v. Keith Larson

Billy is now managed by Lord Alfred Hayes, and that’s a hell of a combo. Billy works a headlock on the mat while Hayes stops by and clarifies Robinson’s title belt situation in a snotty British accent. He’s not just the British COMMONWEALTH champion, he’s the British EUROPEAN champion, you see. Robinson with a neckbreaker for two, which Hayes notes is a “half twisting chancery” Larson takes him down and works a half-nelson for two, and Hayes wonders if they’re trying to “make him laugh, or something” by saying he nearly got Robinson. Billy takes over again with a butterfly suplex, and a gutwrench gets two. Larson works the arm, so Robinson tosses him into the corner and Larson gets all fired up and slugs away. This goes badly for him, as Robinson suddenly unleashes a flurry of strikes and puts him down with a neckbreaker for two, then finishes with the elevated backbreaker at 6:24. Robinson was actually working really light here, so he must have liked the kid. He continues to be a highlight of these shows. 1 for 2.

Buddy Landel and Tony Anthony are interviewed by David, and David is pretty much like “Well, you’re facing Ivan Koloff and Ole Anderson tonight, so you’re pretty much fucked” and Buddy cuts a nervous rookie promo about training hard. I’m assuming this one was a “dark promo” where they’d overdub a local one later.

Jimmy Valiant v. Jeff Powers

Valiant basically stretches out the match to allow Ivan Koloff time to rant on commentary, and the gist is that Valiant is a coward who is unworthy of receiving a TV title shot. Jimmy waits until he’s gone, then finishes with the elbowdrop at 1:30. 1 for 3.

Ray Stevens reveals that he has returned the tag title to Sandy Scott, on the condition that Ole is forced to defend it right away. Well that didn’t happen. Blackjack Jr. wants another shot because he got out of the hold after the show went off the air. Yeah, well, that wasn’t the deal.

Terry Taylor v. Bill White

Roddy Piper joins us on commentary and he is unimpressed by Rookie of the Year Terry Taylor, but more importantly he was won everything there is to win and he’s now done with wrestling on TV. Taylor with a monkey flip on White and a headscissor takedown while Caudle goes for the hard-hitting journalism: Is Roddy Piper jealous of Terry Taylor? What an offensive question. White goes to work on the knee while Piper is actually trying to call the match in a professional manner down the middle, and this has got to be building to something. Taylor with an armbar and a slam for two, but White comes back with chops in the corner. Taylor hits him with a forearm in the corner, and finishes with the abdominal stretch rollup at 5:43. Sadly, the Piper bit did not pay off with an attack. 1 for 4.

Carl Fergie & Ox Baker actually get promo time. Ox Baker has enjoyed beating people up ever since he beat up his sister to steal her Tootsie Pop and then punched his principal in the teeth for trying to make him study. Man, that’s a rough childhood. Fergie clarifies that he’s not hiding behind Ox, but if anyone tries to go after him, they have to go through Ox.

Ole Anderson & Ivan Koloff v. Tony Anthony & Buddy Landel

Roddy Piper remains on commentary in place of David for some reason and I have high hopes for this segment as a result. Koloff works a facelock on Anthony while Piper rightly points out that if a football game ends, the losing team doesn’t get another 30 minutes to win, so Blackjack Jr. lost the challenge. Sandy Scott announces that if Ole doesn’t defend the tag titles within 30 days, he’ll be stripped of them. So Piper is like “Why isn’t this match for the tag titles, then?” Tell ‘em, Piper! The heels take turns on Landel, but he fights back with a slam on Ivan and a small package on Ole for two. Another small package on Koloff gets two. Tony Anthony gets a hot tag, but the heels quickly cut him off and Ivan finishes with the falling knee off the top at 5:00. Good enough for a point. 2 for 5.

Sgt. Slaughter lets us know that he’ll give Blackjack Jr one last shot at the money, but he’s not gonna let go of the hold even if he screams and cries in pain. Which he will. Also, Ole Anderson has both belts back, and it’s a good thing too, because he was just about to come kick Ray Stevens’ teeth down his throat for not returning the belt, but now that has been averted and he’ll get down to the business of finding a new partner. And we’re out for the week!