The SmarK Rant for Monday Night RAW–11.29.93 / 12.06.93 / 12.13.93

The SmarK Legacy Rant for Monday Night RAW – December 6 1993

– Taped from the same place as last week. White Plains, NY?

– Your hosts are Vince & Bobby.

Shawn Michaels v. 1-2-3 Kid

Shawn is of course still wearing the I-C title despite being stripped of it, which marked the first of many titles that he lost without dropping it in the ring. These days he just refuses to win them in the first place. Shawn slugs away in the corner and Kid fires back, and they criss-cross into a great stalemate sequence. Kid follows with a series of kicks to put Shawn on the floor, then follows with a springboard bodypress. He suplexes Shawn back in, then turns it into a bridged german suplex for two and goes to a headlock. Shawn tries a pair of suplexes to escape, but can’t shake him. Finally a third one breaks the hold, but Kid entices Shawn into a chase and then tries a flying headscissors in the corner. Shawn dumps him in a nice bump, but goes after the Kid and ends up taking a bump of his own into the post. Kid follows with a dive off the apron, but Shawn powerslams him onto the floor to counter. We take a break and return with Shawn getting a backbreaker for two. Superplex is countered by Kid with a cross body attempt, but Shawn slams him on the way down and gets two. Backbreaker submission attempt follows, but Kid breaks free and gets a leg lariat for two. They collide for the double KO and Kid makes the comeback, slugging away in the corner. Leg lariat into the corner and Kid goes up with the moonsault for two. To the top again, but a senton bomb misses and we take another break. Back with Shawn hitting the superkick and then going for a Razor’s Edge (complete with mocking gestures), and he actually nails it. That gets two, as Shawn picks him up, and you just know that’s the cue for a run-in. Shawn hits another one and now Razor comes out, wearing the kind of shirt only worn by gay guys or big fat party animals, paired with Zubaz pants no less, and the brawl is on. Double countout at 11:00 or so. Shawn actually gives Razor a pair Razor’s Edges on the floor! And people said this match was DISAPPOINTING? ***1/2 Great piece of business with a hot match and a hot angle to follow.

The Quebecers v. Bert Centano & Mike Walsh (?)

I never know these jobbers names because they talk over the intros. Jacques offers to fight the vertically-challenged Centano on his knees, but the jobber tags out instead. Johnny Polo, meanwhile, gives this match all the attention it warrants by reading a magazine at ringside while relaxing on a lawn chair. Pierre tosses Walsh around and then the short jobber comes back in and gets clobbered. Jacques backdrops Pierre onto him, then a piledriver and the cannonball finish at 4:21.

Meanwhile, Owen Hart promises that soon he’ll have a surprise that will make everyone in the WWF talk about HIM.

Doink the Clown v. Tony Devito

Doink takes Devito down with an armbar and then an STF while Dink frolics in the corner. OK, clearly this isn’t Matt Borne, but he’s not tall enough to be Ray Licachelli yet, so it must be either Keirn or Lombardi playing the clown at this point. Doink with a backdrop suplex and an overhead belly to belly, and he goes to a side headlock. Finally he finishes with the Whoopie Cushion at 5:51 after a boring squash.

Crush v. Tony Roy

Bobby notes that this is a big weekend for Mr. Fuji, because he’s celebrating the anniversary of Pearl Harbor. That’s very wrong, but you have to laugh. Crush’s tights attain a new level of gaudy this weekadding a stylized silver and orange graphic of his name like in the babyface days, but retaining the black and purple color scheme otherwise. Pick a damn color and stick with it! Crush pounds on Roy and chokes away on the ropes, then hangs him in the Tree of Woe for a further beating. Lots of standing around and yelling from Crush here. Crush presses him onto the top rope to finish at 3:54. OK then.

Next week: The Undertaker, Adam Bomb, The Smoking Gunns! Fatu v. Randy Savage!

But before we go, one last piece of business, as Gorilla Monsoon heads out to ringside and finally gets his ultimate revenge on Bobby Heenan, physically removing him from the broadcast position and kicking him out of the building once and for all. And so it’s off to WCW for the Brain. I’m actually kind of sad watching it now, because we know that Heenan didn’t really want to leave and didn’t end up being particularly happy in WCW.

A memorable show with a great match, can’t ask for much more than that.