The SmarK Rant for NXT–07.11.12

The SmarK Rant for NXT – 07.11.12

Taped from Orlando, FL

Your hosts are Byron Saxton & William Regal. Byron on PLAY BY PLAY? Oh geez.

Not that this isn’t a fun show to watch from a historical perspective thus far, but I really wish they’d hurry up and get to the tournament already because these early episodes are really struggling to find a point.

Tyson Kidd v. Camacho

Clearly we’re into taping #2, because they’ve added a section beside the ramp and changed ring announcers, with the arena in general starting to look more the Full Sail we know now. They trade basic stuff to start and Kidd works on the arm, then skins the cat and pulls Camacho out with a headscissors. He tries a dive, but runs afoul of Hunico and decides to just run away instead, and the ref throws out Hunico as a result. He didn’t even do anything! That’s racism! 1

1I mean, granted, the ref is black, but black people can still be racist.

We take a break and return with Kidd holding an armbar while Mr. Regal also makes the same point about Hunico being unfairly persecuted, but Camacho takes him to the mat and starts working the midsection with more basic stuff, including Kidd doing the Bret Hart bump into the turnbuckles. At least that was a logical bump. Camacho gets two from that and suplexes Kidd on the top rope, then faceplants him for two. Camacho goes up and lands on his ass, allowing Kidd to make the comeback with a low dropkick for two. They fight to the top rope and Camacho brings him down with a butterfly superplex for two. Blind charge misses and Kidd goes up with the Blockbuster for two. Tyson with the Sharpshooter, but Michael McGuillicutty runs in for the distraction and Camacho hits a DDT for the pin at 12:28. Wow, they’re learning distraction finishes down there, too! Decent match that built well but was pretty boring most of the way. **1/2

Meanwhile, Matt Striker (!) interviews Justin Gabriel about his big match with Heath Slater next week, but Heath interrupts to point out what a failure Gabriel is. This was during the period when Heath was getting squashed by various legends, which Gabriel points out.

Bray Wyatt v. Aiden English

Bray cuts a promo on the way to the ring, sounding and looking more like Waylon Mercy than the spooky character he became. Definitely a work in progress. Bray quickly tosses English and throws him into the railing a few times, and back in for a corner splash and the first ever Sister Abigail to finish at 1:44. He was still working out the kinks, but you could really see the potential that WWE managed to kill once he got to the main roster. *

Meanwhile, Richie Steamboat gets into a verbal confrontation with Leo Kruger that turns physical while geek interviewer Briley Pierce looks on in horror.

Raquel Diaz debuts next week in her battle against ugmos. Man, that relationship went south in a hurry for whatever reason.

The Usos v. The Primetime Players

Apparently this is our main event. OK then. The Usos quickly gain the advantage while the PTP console each other. We get some double-teaming on Young, but Titus comes in and beats on Jimmy, but tries a headbutt and we learn that Samoan hard-headed stereotypes trump head-headed black guy stereotypes. Young comes in and gets powerslammed by Jey, which gives the Usos the chance to steal Darren’s hair pick. The Players bail and the Usos follow with a dive and WE’VE GOTTA TAKE A BREAK. Back with a chinlock, which shouldn’t surprise anyone who has been watching this THRILLING main event thus far. Question: If Darren Young is “Mr. No Days Off”, as indicated by his ass graphics, why has he been out with an injury for months now? His butt cheeks are actively engaged in false advertising. Young works the leg of an Uso, we’ll say Jey, and takes out Jimmy to prevent the tag. Young continues the roller coaster ride of this match with a stepover toehold. And then Titus comes in and he also tries that move, but is unable to execute because that’s how bad he is. He can’t do a STEPOVER TOEHOLD properly. Hot tag to Other Uso, whom JR is now calling Jey, but he mixed up Mark and Jay Briscoe so what does he know? It’s somewhat BONZO GONZO, like 0.1 worth, and the idiot ref tends to one Uso while the PTP finish with the other Uso with a Demolition Elbow at 10:30. Jim Ross thinks they’re just gonna get better and better. Well, when you start at the bottom, there’s only one direction to go. DUD

The Pulse

Take a pass on this week unless you’re really curious to see Bray Wyatt’s debut.