It is the eve of the Great American Bash and we’ve got a brand new, hilarious co-host for the show: Jim Cornette. A spotlight on the best of his wisecracks throughout the recap, along with a fun tag match with Cornette’s team, and more on this week’s show…
The opening video clip shows the first part of the Road Warrior Hawk/Ric Flair confrontation from last week, which led to a severe and unprecedented beatdown of the Road Warriors by the Four Horsemen…
Jim Cornette & Big Bubba join Tony Schiavone & David Crockett at the podium to start the show from the TBS Studio. Cornette will be the co-host. YES! Hilarity guaranteed to ensue. Cornette says Baby Doll is so fat, when she stands on a street corner, cops tell her to break it up. Cornette introduces his team…
NWA World Tag Team Champions The Midnight Express vs. Sam Houston & George South. Third week in a row Houston faces the MX in a tag match. His teams haven’t fared well the previous two weeks. Houston flips over Beautiful Bobby, cartwheels past him, delivers two dropkicks, a headscissors take down and an arm drag. Solid start. That will end soon because he tags in George South. A rope-running exchange ends with South delivering a flying forearm, followed by a bodyslam. South tags Houston in, who comes off the ropes with the elbow on Bobby’s arm. Houston attempts a back drop but Bobby reads it and executes a neckbreaker. The MX deliver double-shoulder block on Houston that sends him for a 360 flip. Cornette says Houston needs a chiropractor and he’s probably right…
Beautiful Bobby tosses him outside for a big bump. Loverboy Dennis throws Houston back in for more punishment. Dennis works over Houston on the ropes. Vertical suplex from Dennis, followed by a tag and more punishment from Bobby. Houston plays Ricky Morton for awhile, and does it well. He keeps trying to fire back, but the MX are brutalizing him. Houston delivers a small package for a two count, but Bobby maintains the advantage. Dennis slams Houston and drops an elbow, but Houston moves and reaches George South for the hot tag. South catches Dennis with a couple of back elbows and shoulderblocks, but Loverboy Dennis catches him running the ropes and delivers the over-the-knee backbreaker. A powerslam follows, then it’s the Rocket Launcher (the first time they’ve named the move) and the Midnight Express are victorious. Fun match. ***
Afterwards, Tony says they get a lot of cards and letters from all over the country. Cornette says he doesn’t care. Tony says the people are rooting for Baby Doll. Cornette says she’s a dead duck at the Bash…
After a break, Cornette wants to talk about Big Bubba. He says his bodyguard is indestructible and we get the clip of Dusty Rhodes breaking a wooden chair over Bubba’s head, but Bubba does the awesome no-sell. Now, we get a music video of Baby Doll working out in the gym, and it’s really not flattering, though I probably thought differently at the time.
Back live, it’s Ivan & Nikita Koloff & Khrusher Khrushchev vs. Vernon Deaton, Rocky King & Gene Ligon. Cornette says he’s never seen a bull moose sweat before, and he’s in better shape than Baby Doll. Last week he bench-pressed 200 pounds: 20 pounds, 10 times. Impressive! Rocky King gets an early advantage on Uncle Ivan and the jobbers get a series of quick tags as they work on Ivan’s arm. It doesn’t last long as Ligon misses the charge in the corner. Khrusher tags in and works over Ligon, then tags Nikita. Koloff tosses Ligon halfway across the ring with a bodyslam. Vernon Deaton tags in and Cornette says when Deaton went into the store to buy those wrestling tights, he bets they had him arrested for false advertising. All three Russians manhandle Deaton for awhile. Cornette calls referee Pee Wee Anderson the world’s largest midget. Nikita finally finishes him with the standing sickle, as he calls out to Magnum T.A. After the pin, Nikita applies the cobra clutch. **
After a break, the Warlord w/ Baby Doll vs. Mike Simani. Simani tries a wristlock but gets powered off. Simani with a go behind, same result. Cornette says Baby Doll is so fat she has elephants writing her fan letters. The Warlord wins the quick squash with a running powerslam. DUD
Afterward, Baby Doll taunts Cornette and Big Bubba, and challenges Bubba to take on the Warlord. We cut to commercial.
Jim Crockett Jr., wearing a ridiculous hat, joins David & Tony for a Bash update. We get a pre-recorded interview with David Crockett talking to Dusty Rhodes & Magnum T.A. It starts with the guys talking about the greatness of America. Dusty says sometimes we take freedom for granted, and the Bash is a statement of freedom. Dusty says he wants to stop talking about the Bash, and wants to get on with it. We cut to video of Willie Nelson talking about America and the Promised Land.
Back live, it’s Ole & Arn Anderson vs. Tony Zane & Rocky Kernodle. Zane gets a few takedowns on Arn early on, but Arn emerges with a hammerlock and stomps on the arm. He tags in Zane and we get the patented Minnesota Wrecking Crew punishment, working on one part of the party, in this case the left arm, for a few minutes. Zane tags in Kernodle, who lands some punches at Ole’s midsection, but it doesn’t last long and they work on his arm for awhile. Ole drags Zane back in and finishes him off with the flying knee off the top rope into the arm, followed by the armbar submission. *1/2
Afterwards, the Andersons, Tully Blanchard & J.J. Dillon join Cornette at the podium. Dillon says Dusty Rhodes will pay for what he did to Ole Anderson, and rehashes the Horsemen’s demolition of the LOD from last week. Dillon talks about Flair slapping Hawk and hypes their match Tuesday in Philly at the first Great American Bash card. Tully says the Horsemen are like a family and they’ve proven they’re mightier than all the rest. Tully and Ole both says 1986 is the end for Dusty Rhodes. Arn mentions all the title belts they hold and not caring about public opinion. Dillon says the Horsemen are ready and coming for the Great American Bash.
After a break, Paul Ellering joins Tony, who recaps the beatdown by the Horsemen of the Road Warriors last week. Ellering says they’re backstabbers and they’re digging a hole too big for themselves and the walls will come crumbling down. We see the video from last week…
Back live, it’s the Road Warriors and they’re pissed. Animal says they don’t care about titles. They’ve got one thing on their minds, and that’s to have the Horsemen begging for mercy. Hawk says Ric Flair insulted not only Hawk’s pride, but everybody watching, because it took four people holding him for Flair to be able to slap him. Hawk says Flair can’t get the job done by himself, but he’s going to be by himself in Philadelphia. “I’m gonna slap you right outta Veterans Stadium. You can take that to the bank, punk.”
To the ring, it’s the Rock & Roll Express vs. Thunderfoot & Golden Terror. Cornette says the R&R look like an unmade bed. Gibson delivers an atomic drop and backdrop on Thunderfoot. Cornette says Morton looks like a possum with his nose brace on. Morton delivers a dropkick on Thunderfoot. Nice tag team move as Morton whips Gibson into Terror’s midsection, and Morton follows with a DDT. Crockett mentions Baby Doll will team up with the R&R at the Bash. Cornette says Baby Doll’s got a lot of men and her little black book probably looks like the Atlanta phone directory. Thunderfoot delivers a back suplex on Morton, but it doesn’t last, and they put Golden Terror away with the double-dropkick. All action. **
We’ve got a pre-recorded interview with NWA World Heavyweight Champion Ric Flair. He mentions all his challengers at the Bash: Road Warrior Hawk, Rhodes, Garvin, Wahoo, Morton, Gibson, Nikita Koloff, etc. “When you’re Slick Ric, when you’re the man, it really makes no difference, because above all else, the one thing I am that nobody else is, is I’m the champ. When I come through those airports, WHOO, the skycabs are hollering, ‘Here comes the champ’, you know who they’re talking about? They’re talking about Ric Flair, because there’s only one world champion. There’s only one man who’s custom made from head to toe. There’s only one man who’s a kiss stealing, wheelin’ dealin, limousine ridin’, jet flyin’ son of a gun. And that’s the world champion.” He hypes the Bash challenges again and says after the 14 dates, you’re gonna know why he’s the champ. WHOOO!
To the ring, it’s Shaska Whatley & Baron Von Raschke w/ Paul Jones vs. Dave Spencer & Lee Peek. Tony asks why Cornette wasn’t out there when Paul Ellering came out. Cornette says he had to make a call to mama in the back, otherwise he would have slapped Ellering’s face. We see the photoshopped picture of a bald Paul Jones and he and Cornette throw a fit. In the ring, Shaska & the Baron manhandle their foes. Cornette says Baby Doll might look good bald. She certainly doesn’t look good with hair. Shaska delivers the superplex for the win. *
Cornette interviews the Russians. Khrusher says he’s excited about the Bash and the chance to win their six-man tag title back. Ivan mocks Dusty Rhodes and Willie Nelson for talking about America and freedom, and notes they won’t have any freedom inside the cage. Ivan says Nikita is superior to Magnum T.A. and the U.S. Title is coming to Moscow. Nikita talks about his chance at Ric Flair’s title at the Bash card in Memphis on the 4th of July. Nikita says he’s going to hurt and defeat Flair, and it’s been too long since they’ve been in the ring together and Flair’s had that title for too long. It’s going to be the Russian Nightmare, new world’s heavyweight champion.
To the ring, it’s National Heavyweight Champ Tully Blanchard w/ J.J. Dillon vs. Italian Stallion. Stallion gains the early advantage, but Tully outsmarts his man and quickly takes control with shots to the midsection. Blanchard ends it quickly with the slingshot suplex. *
Paul Jones Army joins Cornette to hype the Bash. It will be a pole match in Memphis between the Baron & Jimmy Valiant. Shaska says “Manny Fernando” is going down too. The Baron hypes the pole match with the loaded glove and says he’s going to bash Valiant, and that’s all the people need to know. Shaska says the Baron likes to whup on hillbillies too.
To the ring, it’s Wahoo McDaniel & Ron Garvin vs. Paul Garner & Kent Glover. Garvin ends it quickly with the knockout punch. DUD
Manny Fernandez joins Tony to hype the Bash and says he’s got Jimmy Valiant’s back. That brings out the meth head himself. Valiant says Pistol Pez Whatley & Paul Jones are both gonna lose their hair at the Bash, and he’s gonna beat the Baron’s brains out. And that ends this week’s show.
Fun program, especially Cornette’s cracks. Good job promoting the Bash cards as well. Next week’s program is where it gets really good. Thanks for reading.